do I have the horniest parents?

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Postby black drum » Wed Feb 08, 2017 11:55 am

What I am saying is that I am the horniest parent
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Postby Splash Montgomery » Wed Feb 08, 2017 11:58 am

i am not a parent and i don't fuck
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Postby Catullus » Wed Feb 08, 2017 1:22 pm

I can picture DRAGONS mother and I'm loving it
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Postby milano boy » Wed Feb 08, 2017 1:28 pm

MOTHER OF DRAGONS





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Postby groupb » Wed Feb 08, 2017 1:30 pm

Catullus wrote:I can picture DRAGONS mother and I'm loving it

patricia clarkson?
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Postby milano boy » Wed Feb 08, 2017 1:34 pm

wait this one is better

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Postby Swelling Itching Brain » Wed Feb 08, 2017 6:48 pm

DRAGONS wrote:my mums a weird hippy with long red hair down to her butt and always buys clothes at the shop in the mall that sells dragon statues and drives around in a vw that has a picture of bob Marley smoking a joint painted in rasta colours if that helps you picture this situation better

This explains a lot
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Postby inspectorhound » Wed Feb 08, 2017 6:53 pm

your parents should open an artisan furniture shop
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Postby fox » Wed Feb 08, 2017 7:25 pm

Catullus wrote:I can picture DRAGONS mother and I'm loving it


Should be an option for your thread
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Postby Paul » Wed Feb 08, 2017 8:17 pm

DRAGONS wrote:my boyfriend met my mum for the first time when we were on holidays overseas staying at my parents resort so we were all v cocktail drunk and my bf complained that whenever I had to leave to use the bathroom my mum was asking about if he can leave wet patches like what the heck mum


Oh man
lordofdiapers wrote:Paul is worthy

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Postby quinine » Wed Feb 08, 2017 9:54 pm

Paul wrote:
DRAGONS wrote:my boyfriend met my mum for the first time when we were on holidays overseas staying at my parents resort so we were all v cocktail drunk and my bf complained that whenever I had to leave to use the bathroom my mum was asking about if he can leave wet patches like what the heck mum


Oh man



can someone plz explain this charming strayacism
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Postby fuckyoudad » Wed Feb 08, 2017 10:03 pm

i hate to be a debbie downer but blenders sound nothing like vibrators
Note: mildly comedic.
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Postby quinine » Wed Feb 08, 2017 10:07 pm

immersion blenders




:ahuh: :ahuh:
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Postby groupb » Wed Feb 08, 2017 10:15 pm

fuckyoudad wrote:i hate to be a debbie downer but blenders sound nothing like vibrators

i was thinking more like a muffled mini mixer, not a powerful blender

it's still not a good joke but i'm glad we're analyzing it
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Postby abs » Thu Feb 09, 2017 12:40 am

i once put an unmarked vhs into the player that i can never unsee
☽ ☾ ● ◯ ● ☽ ☾
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Postby Paul » Thu Feb 09, 2017 12:42 am

atomicbombshell wrote:i once put an unmarked vhs into the player that i can never unsee



:o

I walked in on something I'll never unsee either. Whether or not that helped lead to my non-existent sex life, I don't know.
lordofdiapers wrote:Paul is worthy

guy forget wrote:Woah wait a minute Phish is dumb as hell
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Postby ocean pimp » Thu Feb 09, 2017 1:49 am

DRAGONS wrote:just tryna navigate parents and sexuality


i was about to post "black drum to thread" but i got to this page and saw he was here
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Postby Permafrost » Thu Feb 09, 2017 3:04 am

what kinda vw are we talking about
vintage combi? brand new touareg? well maintained 90s soft top golf?
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Postby Jefferson Zeppelin » Thu Feb 09, 2017 3:17 am

midnight smoothies, anyone?
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Postby DRAGONS 666 » Thu Feb 09, 2017 6:26 am

Image it now has a sticker that says more karma less drama with a big yellow smiley face on the front window across in big letters
remember to please don't feed the trolls ;)
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Postby DRAGONS 666 » Thu Feb 09, 2017 6:35 am

they have two of these cars and a modern convertible vw with private number plate of tree hippy, they also have a canoe in the same design and another of their boats is called the 420 explorer. I appreciate my mothers commitment to aesthetics.
remember to please don't feed the trolls ;)
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Postby DRAGONS 666 » Thu Feb 09, 2017 6:37 am

anyway how are u board, I have the worst period cramps right now so I ate a bunch of codeine and got a big pile of grapes and back home and gonna stay up all night high playing the new yakuza life is beautiful
remember to please don't feed the trolls ;)
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Postby Swelling Itching Brain » Thu Feb 09, 2017 6:42 am

BOTP'ing with this banger
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Postby DRAGONS 666 » Thu Feb 09, 2017 6:46 am

I think codeine is very underrated if u like to roll around bed naked appreciating ur sheets as u wait for load screens in video games
remember to please don't feed the trolls ;)
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Postby apostrophe » Thu Feb 09, 2017 7:48 am

Your parents seem cool. Definitely hornier than my parents. I will try to be a horny parent.
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Postby grammatron » Thu Feb 09, 2017 10:20 pm

good thread, excellent vw thing
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Postby ocean pimp » Thu Feb 09, 2017 11:33 pm

Midnight smoothies, anyone?
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Postby groupb » Thu Feb 09, 2017 11:39 pm

is it my catchphrase now?
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Postby Paul » Fri Feb 10, 2017 12:15 am

I could really go for a midnight smoothie. Maybe shake things up a bit.
Last edited by Paul on Fri Feb 10, 2017 11:04 am, edited 1 time in total.
lordofdiapers wrote:Paul is worthy

guy forget wrote:Woah wait a minute Phish is dumb as hell
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Postby joe » Fri Feb 10, 2017 1:19 am

I either helped traumatize my ex's kids or they were deep sleepers, because we were not very quiet
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