The Homeowner Thread

Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
Courtney Love, and Marilyn Manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in

Postby Shotfrog » Mon May 14, 2018 7:33 pm

Today I put flowers in my window boxes for the first time. We’ve been here 8 years.
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Postby tgk » Mon May 14, 2018 7:55 pm

I just replaced my fridge. It was the last major appliance still around that came with the house. It musta been over 20 years old and in the end had to be taped shut lol.
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Postby fresh salad » Mon May 14, 2018 7:56 pm

Thanks wop I might look into it.

Look at this place, I could live the rest of my days here.
https://imgur.com/a/sqsQA8y
Listing photos obvs none of that furniture is mine
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Postby uncledoj » Mon May 14, 2018 8:16 pm

Where is that, near Como?
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Postby fresh salad » Mon May 14, 2018 9:02 pm

Pretty close.
Shit maybe I shouldn’t post that here
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Postby Paul » Mon May 14, 2018 9:24 pm

just put a deposit on a town home. :twisted: :|

i'm a little excited and a little frightened of not having money again. $3000 just to upgrades cabinets? Jesus. 30year mortgage here I come.
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Postby pulled pork » Tue May 15, 2018 12:40 am

what the schmuck wrote:my structural engineer friend is trying to convince me to do do a seismic retro fit to my house since we have 70% of the foundation/pony walls exposed.

i'm totally going to not do it then regret it when The Big One hits 6 months after i close up the walls.



See if you can get your friend to write up the seismic plans. It cost me close to a grand to hire a structural engineer for retrofit plans of our place near the Hayward Fault in Oakland. I signed the WO today to authorize our retrofit job, and then we just had a 3.5 earthquake close by this evening.
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Postby identikit » Wed May 16, 2018 9:58 am

I want to do a reality check on myself since we have a slight storm brewing on the homefront:

does anyone have experience with bulletproof glass in their own home? how ridiculous is it to put that into all basement - correction - ground floor windows, on a scale from 0-10 please.

mister identikit opted for that without as much as telling me first, let alone ask, since he knew damn well I would laugh into his face. I am steaming mad!
Last edited by identikit on Wed May 16, 2018 10:52 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby mcwop23 » Wed May 16, 2018 10:14 am

does it cost significantly more
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Postby identikit » Wed May 16, 2018 10:22 am

yes, because he opted for several layers of that stuff (thicker), but that is not really why I am mad. I am mad because he already starts creating his nuclear fucking bunker.

what are the odds that a bullet from the street will kill either of us downstairs in our home, I mean, come the fuck on. Begs the question what his plans for the garden are, you know, if a bullet from the street offs us in the kitchen, what about being in the garden? can I get a rocket defense system in the garden, please, and also a stone wall that is 3 meters high, just to be on the safe side?

I need to cool off or I will bite his head off. with his damn puppy eyes he also just informed me he ordered the "full package" of a security system. that should be fun, I love me some motion detectors. hope he doesn't forget the panic room.

I am married to a doomsday prepper and didn't know it.
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Postby mcwop23 » Wed May 16, 2018 10:35 am

i’m ok with crazy as long as it’s cheap
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Postby mcwop23 » Wed May 16, 2018 10:35 am

sounds like it’s not cheap tho
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Postby tgk » Wed May 16, 2018 10:38 am

just get a dog, best security system money can buy
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Postby transitive » Wed May 16, 2018 10:40 am

identikit wrote:yes, because he opted for several layers of that stuff (thicker), but that is not really why I am mad. I am mad because he already starts creating his nuclear fucking bunker.

what are the odds that a bullet from the street will kill either of us downstairs in our home, I mean, come the fuck on. Begs the question what his plans for the garden are, you know, if a bullet from the street offs us in the kitchen, what about being in the garden? can I get a rocket defense system in the garden, please, and also a stone wall that is 3 meters high, just to be on the safe side?

I need to cool off or I will bite his head off. with his damn puppy eyes he also just informed me he ordered the "full package" of a security system. that should be fun, I love me some motion detectors. hope he doesn't forget the panic room.

I am married to a doomsday prepper and didn't know it.


Why didn't he just go with glass block windows for the basement?
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Postby tgk » Wed May 16, 2018 10:42 am

You can use this to determine how much shooting/burglary/etc actually occurs on your block here

http://gis.chicagopolice.org/clearmap_crime_sums/startpage.htm#
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Postby identikit » Wed May 16, 2018 10:47 am

oh his head would be off by now. glass block look like shit, I want to actually see, the windows are big, and many of them. I picked the wrong term, not basement basement, the ground floor, entry level, so kitchen, dining room, living room etc.

yea see he found a crime report on drive by shootings in exactly our street, from years ago. that is what he is stating right now.

sigh, too late now anyway. as for the dog - we had one in our last home in chicago, mister dog now lives with the inlaws. that argument isn't a really good one, since that dog loved everyone and would welcome strangers by wiggling his tail and licking their shoes, and eventually mister identikit punched a person who was kicking the dog to defend the dog instead of the other way around...


mcwop23 wrote:i’m ok with crazy as long as it’s cheap


haha, I will try to go with that one. I am okay with crazy as long as....puh....it makes him happy?
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Postby what the schmuck » Wed May 16, 2018 11:00 am

I assume the rest of the house is stone/brick because otherwise bulletproof glass is kinda a waste.

I can only imagine the costs of putting in bulletproof windows correctly.How much do they weigh vs a regular window? That would need to be potentially mean putting in a different sill, also since they are on the ground floor i would assume that you might want to open them in case of a fire to escape or have the fire department pull them out (because they sure arent breaking them).
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Postby transitive » Wed May 16, 2018 11:07 am

identikit wrote:oh his head would be off by now. glass block look like shit, I want to actually see, the windows are big, and many of them. I picked the wrong term, not basement basement, the ground floor, entry level, so kitchen, dining room, living room etc.

yea see he found a crime report on drive by shootings in exactly our street, from years ago. that is what he is stating right now.

sigh, too late now anyway. as for the dog - we had one in our last home in chicago, mister dog now lives with the inlaws. that argument isn't a really good one, since that dog loved everyone and would welcome strangers by wiggling his tail and licking their shoes, and eventually mister identikit punched a person who was kicking the dog to defend the dog instead of the other way around...


mcwop23 wrote:i’m ok with crazy as long as it’s cheap


haha, I will try to go with that one. I am okay with crazy as long as....puh....it makes him happy?


Oh ok. I mean, I don't think I would shell out for bulletproof on the ground floor. I don't know. Where do you live? Kabul?
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Postby tgk » Wed May 16, 2018 11:13 am

Personally I don't like security systems because it implies that I have something worth stealing in my house. That's also why I keep my yard and front porch looking shabby and rundown, at least, that's what I tell myself.
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Postby mcwop23 » Wed May 16, 2018 11:17 am

if someone broke into my house i think we’d be out like, maybe $1000?

basically whatever to replace a tv and ps4
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Postby identikit » Wed May 16, 2018 11:24 am

transitive wrote: Where do you live? Kabul?

apparently. I just figured out a nice tactic though, I will keep up my super madness for a bit longer, and then make sure I get away with whatever I fucking want inside that house by playing the "but you did all that shit, remember?" card. so we will end up broke but with a lot of shit we want.

figure that's how you operate smoothly.

oh oh, update:
what the schmuck wrote:I assume the rest of the house is stone/brick because otherwise bulletproof glass is kinda a waste.



thank you so much. yes brick bunker, but confronted with this question:
That would need to be potentially mean putting in a different sill, also since they are on the ground floor i would assume that you might want to open them in case of a fire to escape or have the fire department pull them out (because they sure arent breaking them).

turns out he doesn't know. hasn't discussed it with the construction company, either. is now terrified of fire. and realized he wants a sprinkler system but maybe windows you cant open aren't a great idea.

man.... I thought getting this house fixed up in our absence while we are thousands of miles away would be a walk in the park. I had not properly calculated the crazy factor.
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Postby Spoilt Victorian Child » Wed May 16, 2018 1:27 pm

If the situation actually calls for bulletproof windows, that money is probably better spent moving to a different house.
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Postby Spoilt Victorian Child » Wed May 16, 2018 1:28 pm

Has he considered tactical armor? Works outside the house too.
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Postby what the schmuck » Wed May 16, 2018 1:53 pm

identikit wrote:
transitive wrote: Where do you live? Kabul?

apparently. I just figured out a nice tactic though, I will keep up my super madness for a bit longer, and then make sure I get away with whatever I fucking want inside that house by playing the "but you did all that shit, remember?" card. so we will end up broke but with a lot of shit we want.

figure that's how you operate smoothly.

oh oh, update:
what the schmuck wrote:I assume the rest of the house is stone/brick because otherwise bulletproof glass is kinda a waste.



thank you so much. yes brick bunker, but confronted with this question:
That would need to be potentially mean putting in a different sill, also since they are on the ground floor i would assume that you might want to open them in case of a fire to escape or have the fire department pull them out (because they sure arent breaking them).

turns out he doesn't know. hasn't discussed it with the construction company, either. is now terrified of fire. and realized he wants a sprinkler system but maybe windows you cant open aren't a great idea.

man.... I thought getting this house fixed up in our absence while we are thousands of miles away would be a walk in the park. I had not properly calculated the crazy factor.


Sprinkler systems are insanely expensive to install and maintain from what I gather. Is the water line coming into the house able to handle the pressure of when they open up the flood gates? Are you willing to literally have everything ruined if you have a grease fire in your kitchen, because a system doesn't know the difference between a small and big fire.
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Postby mcwop23 » Wed May 16, 2018 2:07 pm

fires are why you have homeowners insurance
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Postby tgk » Wed May 16, 2018 2:09 pm

Aren't you legally obligated to have homeowners insurance?
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Postby Ted Pikul » Wed May 16, 2018 2:11 pm

I would point out to him that bullets can also pass through walls
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Postby identikit » Wed May 16, 2018 8:14 pm

on tonight's episode in "they don't know what they are doing", for your entertainment:

it is 2am, I come from 16 hours work, and we are at it again. so I am simply thowing everything I just read at him. works great.

different house - over my dead body, you only find a house like that once. and the area is not crime ridden at all, certainly not with home invasions that come along with shooting people through their windows. this "my god bullets" thing is just in his damn doomsday head all of a sudden.

tactial armor - I suggested he partrols the lawn 24/7 to properly protect us, because the lawn will be where he lives if he keeps this up, so good call.

sprinkler system - is out for now, because thanks to that post I introduced him to the scenario that the things why he wants that fancy alarm system (namely film cameras, stored at home) will be, as he very well knows, ruined by water and our insurance does not cover water damage you could have prevented - like sprinklers over cameras.

so now he looks lost, fire fighters won*t be able to rescue us from being burned alive because they cant't get in,that is too bad. if I keep going to 3am with the tactic to describe in detail how we will burn to death behind our unbreakable windows, he might crack!

bullets penetrate walls, too - this is currently my favorite. imagine, gasp, with all the bank glass, and then, one of your family members, will get shot - THROUGH A WALL; and bleed to death, slowly. how will you feel? when you clearly failed to BUILD A FUCKING BUNKER.

he does not like this story arc very much, I, no the other hand, am loving it. I can be so annyoing (duh!), by 4am he might drop all the plans just to shut me the fuck up.

:barney:
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Postby fresh salad » Thu May 17, 2018 4:49 pm

Welp,
When I was "pre-qualified" for a mortgage last Monday the rates were under %4.89, now they are creeping up and past %5.
Any prognosticators on where the mortgage rates are going in the next month?
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Postby mcwop23 » Thu May 17, 2018 4:51 pm

only up
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