Hipinion Plays Mass Effect 3

[Merciel]

So much of the dialogue in this game does not make any sense.

"THEY USED OUR OWN TACTICS AGAINST US!! OVERWHELMING FORCE!!"

uh that's not really a "tactic" dude

And I mean I get how hard it is to write portentous "the galaxy is ending!!" dialogue and not have it sound completely stupid but come on.

[Merciel]

on another note. is mass effect 3 worth playing if i'm a big fan of the hpn movie series.

Maybe? I think it's more fun to shit on things in realtime but I guess you can figure out from this thread whether it's worthwhile to you.

We met Jack and then SVC died three times in quick succession to those Bioshock diving suit guys and quit playing for tonight.

[iambic]

Bioshock diving guys?

[iambic]

The deaths of Mordin and Thane were pretty affecting, but it's almost as if Bioware are going out of their way to kill off everyone I like while sparing the douchebags. at least Udina bought it.

I have now turned down/crudely said "no homo" to four people, including meltyface Chobot. with Ashley I just forbade her from rejoining the crew so I wouldn't have to marvel at her botox mouth a minute longer

[beave]

edit: actually i dont know

[powderfinger]

man that AV Club review is something

We’ve seen our home invaded before, but Mass Effect 3 manages, with extreme economy, to make this attack mean something. That’s because BioWare immediately makes it personal. Players discover a young boy huddled in the smoldering ashes and offer to escort the boy to safety. “You can’t save me,” the kid says. And he’s right.

I'm starting to think the actual Onion has started to distance itself from the increasing fucktardism of its AV Club.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/online-recap-of-tv-show-attracts-25000-readers-who,27581/

that Onion bit is perfect

[chairkicker]

ashley's a genetic experiment. and it's funny how they made a big deal about getting hair right this time around only to have it fixed to each female's frame like parasitic molasses

[Boo]

the best thing about ME3 is the instant one button save with back button. all console games should have this.

[Spoilt Victorian Child]

that onion article jeremy posted is making me laugh so hard.

Yeah that is amazing.

Why exactly is Cerberus attacking this school full of people who need a life raft. Wouldn't it make more sense to just offer them a life raft and then take them wherever you want.

[mikey]

are you talking about the grissom academy? Cause they only needed the evac because of cerberus

[Spoilt Victorian Child]

No they need the evac because the reaper frontline is approaching.

[Blackeyed]

I liked how EDI started to explain how it's possible that a Reaper could get taken down by a simple thresher maw and then just sort of abandoned the thought in favor of taking about how to justify her feelings of wanting to ride Joker's rod.

[iambic]

it was only when I saw EDI sitting in the cockpit that I realized her design effectively had her wandering about in thigh-high stockings

[Spoilt Victorian Child]

EDI getting a sexy robot body is such a perfect development.

[nibelheim]

p much done with this game, nowhere near 100%

[iambic]

someone needs to release a save game editor that lets me change my galactic readiness without doing multiplayer

because having to suffer through a substandard ending just because I pirated isn't acceptable

[Merciel]

EDI getting a sexy robot body is such a perfect development.

Somehow it came as an unexpected development to me, even though this thread had kinda warned me about it, but godfuckingdammit I was really hoping that would go somewhere else.

Like why doesn't Kaidan/Ashley get hit with Cerberus nanobots when Dr. Eva attacks him/her? Then it would make more sense that you can't just medigel the injury away AND it would possibly have some urgency in terms of "gotta fix this before they take over" AND it could be an interesting subplot development.

But nope instead the AI gets metallic '60s hair (which somehow nobody noticed when Dr. Eva was passing herself off as human because I don't know why, I guess if you spraypaint it black it suddenly doesn't look like robot hair anymore).

[Feech La Manna]

While EDI is visiting the Purgatory Bar, Shepard has the opportunity to inquire about the technical specifications of her new body. According to EDI, the hair and face are comprised of a flexible alloy that mimics certain organic features, specifically, healing and softness. As an additional feature, these parts can harden to protect the synthetic brain inside from damage. EDI also mentions that the hair can change shape or form. She has set the hair to "protection mode", a hard shell encasing the skull in the manner of a helmet. But should she choose to do so, she could separate the strands and have actual hairstyles. But there is a technical drawback, if the synthetic strands become wet, they cannot hold the pattern set by the control program. EDI's exact comment is "I can't do a thing with it".

[Feech La Manna]

Really it only becomes more perfect when you realize that Bioware expects their players to become invested in getting the emotionally crippled guy who barely ever leaves his station laid by the computer he has a deep connection with (which happens to have a sexy, sexy robot body).

Although they're probably right in most cases so whatever.

[Spoilt Victorian Child]

Hajime Sorayama.

That is who I was trying to remember.

[miss black america]

Hajime Sorayama.

That is who I was trying to remember.

huh

turns out this japanese artist isn't a worksafe google image search

who knew?

[Spoilt Victorian Child]

lol sorry about that.

[iambic]

While EDI is visiting the Purgatory Bar, Shepard has the opportunity to inquire about the technical specifications of her new body. According to EDI, the hair and face are comprised of a flexible alloy that mimics certain organic features, specifically, healing and softness. As an additional feature, these parts can harden to protect the synthetic brain inside from damage. EDI also mentions that the hair can change shape or form. She has set the hair to "protection mode", a hard shell encasing the skull in the manner of a helmet. But should she choose to do so, she could separate the strands and have actual hairstyles. But there is a technical drawback, if the synthetic strands become wet, they cannot hold the pattern set by the control program. EDI's exact comment is "I can't do a thing with it".

this part is really creepy, fwiw, especially the softness

it's kind of amazing how they took the Joker/EDI relationship in ME2, where it was just about the right kind of absurd and discomfiting, and turned it into an actual fandork wet dream

half expecting there to be a "gather Tali's sweat" subquest

[Spoilt Victorian Child]

While EDI is visiting the Purgatory Bar, Shepard has the opportunity to inquire about the technical specifications of her new body. According to EDI, the hair and face are comprised of a flexible alloy that mimics certain organic features, specifically, healing and softness. As an additional feature, these parts can harden to protect the synthetic brain inside from damage. EDI also mentions that the hair can change shape or form. She has set the hair to "protection mode", a hard shell encasing the skull in the manner of a helmet. But should she choose to do so, she could separate the strands and have actual hairstyles. But there is a technical drawback, if the synthetic strands become wet, they cannot hold the pattern set by the control program. EDI's exact comment is "I can't do a thing with it".

this part is really creepy, fwiw, especially the softness

it's kind of amazing how they took the Joker/EDI relationship in ME2, where it was just about the right kind of absurd and discomfiting, and turned it into an actual fandork wet dream

Yes to both of these.

[MADONNA WAYNE GACY]

ok i'm kinda disappointed i'm not playing this now

how is this not a japanese game.

[Feech La Manna]

I think my favorite part is the lame, mildly sexist joke at the end of that paragraph.

"See! Wee have a sense of humor about it!"

[Feech La Manna]

Based on my limited playing experience and some youtubes it appears that this game has fully embraced the idea that "Renegade" moral choices are more about arbitrarily being a dickhead than disregarding rules or ethics

[Paul E. Pasta]

Just beat this. I liked the game for the most part, especially the combat which i thought was the strongest of the series. I am a completionist so I found every artifact I could and delivered them to all the people on the citadel which was probably the most annoying part of the game. Usually I would do one or two missions and then go to the citadel and walk by every person on it to check for more missions or to see if I could drop something off I found.

Kind of iffy on that ending. I think this article mostly sums up how I feel about it. Spoilers obviously http://tinyurl.com/7xd8bya

The part where you have to chose between the Geth and the Quarians fucked with me. I chose Legion to allow the upload and the consequences were not what I wanted. I almost reloaded the game but I stuck with my guns. The Quarians were told to stop attacking and they didn't so fuck em.

1>3>2

Going to play through the entire series as a girl next.

[Paul E. Pasta]

Based on my limited playing experience and some youtubes it appears that this game has fully embraced the idea that "Renegade" moral choices are more about arbitrarily being a dickhead than disregarding rules or ethics

Yeah I played the first one as a Renegade girl on my third playthrough and it just turns the game in to a comedy because of how much of a dick you are. In the end, you're still trying to save the galaxy.

[Merciel]

Bioshock diving guys?