Dedicated Horror Nerd Thread

Let's talk Aguachile Alley

Postby Ampersand » Tue Nov 07, 2017 7:28 pm

The Lure is so good.

This is An Official Ampersand Take.
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Postby all of the world » Wed Nov 15, 2017 6:05 am

kept putting off writing about what i watched and the more i put it off the bigger the list got and the less i felt like doing it. but here's what i've watched since i last checked in:

The Satanic Rites of Dracula (1973)
Peter Cushing is the reason to watch Hammer Dracula movies so much more than Christopher Lee. This one is sort of like a less interesting Prince of Darkness with its technological approach to evil. still, any movie that has Dracula planning to wipe out humanity for, uh, some reason has to be worth watching.

Fantom Kiler 3 (2003) / Fantom Kiler 4 (2008)
okay all four of these are horrible woman-hating pieces of shit but part 4 really turns it up to 11 by moving to hardcore sex (sort of) and having the killer (who is sort of different in each movie but really i think they just don't care about a mythology in this series) dedicated to humiliating professional women. like i knew this stuff wouldn't be good but i didn't expect something i would hate this much. so there's that.

The Spectre of Edgar Allan Poe (1974)
kinda like Soderbergh's Kafka approach - Poe stuck in a Poe-like story when his fiancee goes catatonic and is institutionalized but Poe gets bad vibes from the place and sneaks around and investigates. it isn't exactly good but it's interesting enough.

Tomie: Rebirth (2001)
the fourth one. definitely love this series so far and each entry gets slightly better. i am pacing myself here because i know by part 9 it has to start sucking. right?

Mother's Day: What a Horror! (1995)
this is a comedy and it's not a good one but it is an oddball film with some zombies and if you ever are thinking of checking it out, you can stop after the opening credits, which contain the best thing: a theme song that imagines what Goblin filtered through C+C Music Factory would sound like singing/rapping about Deep Red

Passengers (2008)
Anne Hathaway in one of those horror movies Hollywood makes for people who don't like horror movies. i've seen worse films but this is very bland. and okay, it's the second time i've seen it so i guess the joke's on me, but i have to rewatch these films i only half-remember from the time years ago when i would watch films drunk

The Wicksboro Incident (2003)
a decent faux documentary about aliens. decent as in so-so. on my stupid rating scale it's a 4.5/10

American Burger (2014)
swedish people pretending to be americans visiting a swedish place called American Burger where the ingredient is... i'll let you wonder about that. this films is all stalk and slash with a cast so huge you can't keep track of anyone or give a shit about them. also it's a "comedy"

Night School (1981)
not a very memorable 80s slasher but still a pretty decent one

The Unseen (1980)
from the director of Friday the 13th: A New Beginning! so-so tale of reporters covering an Oktoberfest parade and staying in a museum that used to be a hotel with a crazy family. the climax goes on way too long.

Panga aka Curse III: Blood Sacrifice (1991)
white people in africa cause problems and get a curse put on them. i liked Christopher Lee in this and there's some fun effects. okay.

Cover Girl Killer (1959)
a very loose proto-slasher with a killer who only kills models who have been on the cover of a particular gentlemen's magazine. more interesting than entertaining.

Death Magic (1992)
a confederate ghost/zombie soldier versus satanists. pretty entertaining sov

Evil Streets (1998)
sov anthology with a theme of stalkers/assault. not good but i don't regret watching a musclebound hunk in a gstring stalking a stripper in the halls of a school. because that's some high concept right there

Superstition II (1989)
excruciatingly irritating teens run afoul of a witch and she cannot kill them fast enough

Halloween II (1981)
every time i watch this i find more things wrong with it but i still enjoy it despite its myriad flaws

Symptoms (1974)
Angela Pleasence is great in this (and reminiscent of her father) sorta moody gothic piece. watch the extras on the bluray and find out that jose ramon larraz is a huge asshole.

Zombie Cult Massacre (1998)
some of the zombies have an interesting look in this and the concept of a christian doomsday cult causing a zombie apocalypse is interesting but this movie sucks

The Old Dark House (1932)
didn't suspect i would completely love this movie nor did i expect to find it so (intentionally) funny. awesome.

Crimson Peak (2015)
holy shit i hated this.

Annabelle: Creation (2017)
this also sucked, which is too bad since I liked Lights Out. but at least it had that funny YOUR SOUL moment. could someone explain to me why this couple chose to take orphans in?

Can't Take It Back (2017)
basically what if supernatural forces punished you for facebook bullying. 3.5/10

Day of the Animals (1977)
still not sure how all these animal attacks are so boring. leslie nielsen as a creep makes it worth watching, hotshot.

Totem (2017)
while the end goes on a little too long this is a very solid horror movie with good characters. dad's girlfriend is moving in and the dead mom's ghost is showing up to his youngest daughter.

Leatherface (2017)
i'm probably in the minority that i found most of this series enjoyable save The Beginning. Well this is worse than that one. so pointless. and i even liked Teas Chainsaw 3D

Wake the Dead (2017)
haunted house, seance, possessions, not very good

Cherry Tree (2016)
pretty good witchcraft tale from ireland

The Island of Dr. Moreau (1996)
first time watching this after seeing the Richard Stanley documentary and i still can't bring myself to hate this. i find it entertaining at least.

The Lawnmower Man (1992)
hey this still sucks. other than Jeff Fahey's outfit and portrayal of a god. should i bother watching the director's cut?

Disconnect (2010)
toy phone can call the past and a woman uses it to prevent her mom's murder but just mucks shit up more. bad time travel stuff here.

Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (1977)
still lukewarm on this one

Fragile (2005)
calista flockhart in a haunted institution. okay.

Boardinghouse [director's cut] (1982)
watching this made me wonder what it would be like if it was a 19 hour series on Showtime.

Creepshow (1982) / Creepshow 3 (2006)
i don't know how controversial this is but i'm not really a fan of the original. but of course part 3 is worse.

Dying Day (1983) / Dark Night (1985) / Raiders of the Living Dead (1986)
this is certainly interesting to see one film made into another and then another but only Dying Day comes close to being good

Night of the Demon (1957)
one of those classics i've taken decades to get around to and it lives up to the hype. great film.

Anarchy Parlor (2015)
like Hostel, but at a tattoo parlor! it isn't good!

Documenting the Grey Man (2011)
the only good part of this bullshit documentary is when Chad the psychic/medium starts bleeding from the eyes and runs into the bathroom and shuts the door. when the others open the door the bathroom is empty. the lead investigator says "It's just Chad being Chad."

Talon Falls (2017)
what if the stuff that happened at haunted house attractions was real? you know, the ones where it's just a bunch of little rooms with people being convincingly tortured and chopped up and screaming. oh you don't know what i'm talking about?

Found Footage 3D (2016)
definitely worth it although at least half the fun was the anaglyph 3D,

I Am Zozo (2012)
shot on super 8 - that's the best thing about this ouija board/possession movie

Scent (2014)
zombie movie that breaks the fourth wall and has the director as the bad guy and it sucks

The Small Woman in Grey (2017)
UK slasher that's pretty unremarkable

Black Ghosts (2015)
fuck i have a feeling this will be another opinion i'm alone on but i loved this. it took awhile for me to settle into the rhythm and atmosphere but i did and i guess i'd describe it like this: what if those silly captain howdy images in The Exorcist were deeply disturbing and creepy. you know, like they were i suppose intended to be

Day of the Dead 2: Contagium (2005)
when this came out i hated it so much but watching it again now i can definitely say they at least were putting some effort into it. still no excuse to try and link it to Day of the Dead, but whatever. also still not actually good.

Sounds of Silence (1989)
what if you found out you inherited a haunted orphanage in sweden? this is nothing special but it looks nice and isn't a total waste of time.

The Appointment (1981)
i went from chuckling to disbelief to loving this. so yeah, i love a horror movie with The Equalizer in it. that car crash! that daughter! everything in it, basically

I Saw What You Did (1988)
Shawnee Smith, Candace Cameron, Robert & David Carradine (as brothers!). the cast is really the only reason to watch this remake. the original is a much better (still silly) movie

Netherworld (1992)
no

Lilith's Hell (2015)
let's get Ruggero Deodato to be in a found footage movie and talk about Cannibal Holocaust but make the movie utterly cookie-cutter in every other way

Fiend (1980)
someone on imdb or something described this as the tale of a good ron swanson versus and evil ron swanson and that description is more fun that the movie. but it looks great

Dark Shade Creek (2012) /Dark Shade Creek 2 (2014) / Dark Shade Creek III: Trail to Hell (2017)
slasher movie where the killer is a logger driven mad by lsd. unfortunately they do nothing interesting with that idea. the first movie sucks and the sound and video are awful. the technical side improves in part 2 but nothing else does. in part 3 there was one minorly amusing scene. by part 20 they'll have a good movie on their hands.

The Suckling (1990)
sure seems like a troma movie. aborted fetus exposed to radioactive waste attacks back alley abortion clinic. fun trash

Dead Body (2017)
a game about murder turns into the real thing! who is the killer? blah

Bloody Murder (2017)
this is a lot like Dead Body but in this case it's strangers gathered together instead of friends.
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Postby aububs » Wed Nov 15, 2017 7:09 am

all of the world wrote:Boardinghouse [director's cut] (1982)
watching this made me wonder what it would be like if it was a 19 hour series on Showtime.


haha yes. PERFECT.

perfect.

that's what they should do.
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Postby goofjan » Thu Nov 16, 2017 10:41 am

hm.

plz if u get a chanse put some flowrs on algernons grave kthxbye
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Postby manvstrees » Thu Nov 16, 2017 10:49 am

that looks like another amityville that they gave a fake title to like the first blair witch trailer
except no one would ever care about amityville reboot
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Postby goofjan » Thu Nov 16, 2017 10:52 am

but maybe it will have cool monsters?
plz if u get a chanse put some flowrs on algernons grave kthxbye
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Postby mcphee » Thu Nov 16, 2017 10:53 am

Canadian Todd (for Canadians) wrote:I

10. XX

The interstitial stop-motion animation just felt cheap and ineffective. Like, it was sub-Tool music video shit. The segments were wildly inconsistent. The first one was really good - a nice portrait of a family unraveling. It’s total Ketchum. The last one was dece - a satanic cult/conspiracy that slowly reveals itself to the audience. The actress playing the mom was really good and the most disturbing part of the whole thing was the Satan son forcing her to get on her knees. It was debasing and a gross shift in power dynamicsToggle Spoiler. The St. Vincent one sucked and failed at being bleakly comical. It had these stupid subplots that felt like barely baked digressions (e.g., what’s up with the personal assistant drinking alcohol and maybe hating the mom?) It was bad. The monster/haunted desert one was just too trite/uninspired to be anything other than technically competent.


I really loved the first segment in this. I thought it was a great short film and it was cool to see a horror film that was about something unique. Very interesting / creepy take on parenthood. I liked the Kusama one too (the last segment - I think I said all this earlier in the thread), but there's a line very early that gives it away if you are, like me, obsessed with the film to which it is a "sequel." So while I enjoyed it I also thought it was a missed opportunity. Because why make a faux-sequel to that film without aping any of its style?
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Postby mcphee » Thu Nov 16, 2017 10:54 am

It should also be noted that the other two segments are trash and, again, the St Vincent portion might be the worst short film I have ever seen.
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Postby Mesh » Fri Nov 17, 2017 8:49 am

Is it just me or did Shudder really REALLY fuck up their Roku navigation?
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Postby Mesh » Tue Nov 21, 2017 11:17 pm

dan wrote:Oct. 18 - Image YOKAI MONSTERS:ONE HUNDRED MONSTERS (1968)

Image
Image
Image
Image


The local yôkai (Japanese spirits) interfere to avenge a murder and thwart the plans of corrupt officials.



The mad monsters of olde Japan stepping in when some no good crooks try to demolish the local r̶e̶c̶ ̶c̶e̶n̶t̶e̶r̶ shrine. It's actually much less silly than than the synopsis and screencaps would imply but still generally quite fun if you enjoy chilling in the Edo era. The director did a bunch of Zatoichi movies (and the wonderful Daimajin) so it kind of feels like one of those with rubber spirits coming in to spice things up. Human characters are pretty lacking and it's pretty lite on monsters up until the end, but overall it's got great atmosphere and doesn't overstay it's welcome so I'll be happy to check out the two sequels. B


I ride for Yokai, that Snake Neck Lady sold me pretty good.
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Postby jalapeño ranch » Tue Nov 21, 2017 11:39 pm

By any chance does anyone have a rip of Among the Living with good subtitles? The one I have is wretched but I'm fairly certain it's on Shudder so maybe there's a good rip I just haven't found yet. Thanks!
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Postby FourLegsGood » Sat Dec 02, 2017 8:48 pm

Aside from "Black Christmas", Gremlins, and the Xmas-themed Tales from the Crypt segment from 1972, what are the best holiday-themed horror films?
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Postby Decimal Place » Sat Dec 02, 2017 9:09 pm

Not a film, but from last year, the Inside No.9 Christmas special, 'The Devil Of Christmas', was really great, particularly if you're into any of the old '70s British anthology TV shows (like Beasts, Thriller, etc.). The whole thing is done in the style of a director's commentary. It's pretty great.
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Postby Poptone » Sat Dec 02, 2017 11:23 pm

FourLegsGood wrote:Aside from "Black Christmas", Gremlins, and the Xmas-themed Tales from the Crypt segment from 1972, what are the best holiday-themed horror films?














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Postby futurist » Sun Dec 03, 2017 4:02 am

elves & dead end are both great.

been doing tons of winter watching, need to post a log in here soon.
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Postby Momofuku » Sun Dec 03, 2017 7:43 am

let's get a Holiday Spooky Flix DB folder going...
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Postby aububs » Sun Dec 03, 2017 4:02 pm

i saw this a couple of weeks ago and it's actually pretty good

Image
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Postby Peter Criss » Sun Dec 03, 2017 4:12 pm

^ agreed, it's worth a watch
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Postby Poptone » Sun Dec 03, 2017 6:11 pm

watched that as part of my October marathon and thought it was just okay. but it also wasn't quite what i expected so i might give it another chance this month if i'm hanging out w/ friends and they hit me up for xmas horror
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Postby mcphee » Wed Dec 06, 2017 6:30 pm

This is vague and probably impossible to answer, but there was a film that was highly rec'd in this thread a year or so ago and I got it from DB, then managed to delete it without watching. It seemed like a slow-burn, more cerebral thing. Foreign, I think. Woman director. Had the same title as another horror film. Believe it started with a "C." Possibly very wrong on any/all descriptors listed.

(I just went back through about a year of posts and couldn't find it)
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Postby mcphee » Wed Dec 06, 2017 7:05 pm

HOTEL, YOU ASSHOLES
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Postby emotional fascism » Wed Dec 06, 2017 7:10 pm

Hotel is SO GOOD
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Postby goofjan » Fri Dec 08, 2017 3:19 pm

https://www.shoutfactory.com/product/the-burbs-collector-s-edition
Shout Select doing The 'Burbs after Matinee! Hoping for those alternate endings.
plz if u get a chanse put some flowrs on algernons grave kthxbye
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Postby Disko aka Disco » Fri Dec 08, 2017 5:48 pm

is Red Xmas worth a watch??
Better watch out wasn't amazing, but def fun enough..
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Postby futurist » Mon Dec 11, 2017 4:19 pm

so did The Snowman turn out to be trash? i forgot about that...
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Postby aububs » Mon Dec 11, 2017 4:30 pm

the fassbender movie?

if so yeah it's total garbage except for the BIZARRE appearance by val kilmer
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Postby futurist » Mon Dec 11, 2017 4:39 pm

woah sounds sick
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Postby Poptone » Mon Dec 11, 2017 6:27 pm

i guess pet semetary reboot is a go from the directors of Starry Eyes (yay!) and the writer of Midnight Meat Train ( :? )
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Postby futurist » Tue Dec 12, 2017 6:14 pm

been slacking on writing down. might be some overlap here with my last viewing dump:

Christmas Evil (1980) - great twisted little case file of childhood trauma. great christmas watch

Silent Night, Deadly Night 5: The Toy Maker (1991) - glad to finally get this series over with even though it's definitely not the worst. rooney is a freak. this was a little fun, nothing i'll watch again

Deadly Games (1989) - home alone meets tales from the crypt santa story. lots of fun, super magical. and the french cover of eye of the tiger really sets the stage

Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things (1971) - weird florida exploitation.... fun more for the idea of it all rather than the film itself. only for fans of similar trash

mother! (2017) - beyond the heavy handed (and unnecessary imo) metaphors, aranofsky is a pro at portraying anxiety, and his seamless and surreal passage of time was perfect. enjoyed it for the ride

Creep 2 (2017) - i dunno, this was really boring. the first was only a little better.

The Suckling (1990) - now this is my shit. gory and strange and lots to chew on.

The Uninvited Guest (2004) - the premise hooked me from the beginning. a guy let's a stranger use his phone before disappearing in the house. until the tonal shift about 3/4 through i was having a blast. still a good watch overall

Horror House on Highway Five (1985) - great low budget slasher, my favorite kind of fever dream

The Boogeyman (1982) - from the King nightshift shorts collection. pretty mellow one, wish it was creepier

The Woman In The Room (1982) - same collection, same takeaway

Found Footage 3d (2016) - didn't watch in 3d, but a pretty terrible premise for explaining the 3d. "why are we shooting on 3d?" / "so we can say we're the first to do it!" would've liked something more creative. and pretty short on scares too.

Happy Death Day (2017) - pretty fun, pretty forgettable. good popcorn flick

The Borrower (1991) - loved this. John McNaughton does 'the hidden.'
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Postby goofjan » Sat Dec 16, 2017 12:26 am

thanks for that review round up, futurist! love it.

does anyone have a rip of abominable snowman of the himalayas?
plz if u get a chanse put some flowrs on algernons grave kthxbye
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