the summer after i graduated college i was dating my ex-girlfriend from high school, with whom i once had a really long, serious relationship. she didn't drink at all and, at the time, i had kind of a drinking problem. i convinced her that every tuesday i go out to this specific bar and hang out with my friends and acquaintances and have a good time and how much it means to me. so she says ok no big deal, but stays at home and i go to the bar by myself. i get totally loaded and by 2am i hop in my car to drive home and crawl into bed. as i'm driving down kennedy blvd. i see the mcdonalds and steer into the parking lot. at this point i black out and wake up 2 hours later with my car suspended like a see-saw halfway over a landscaped concrete partition separating the back of the drive-thru from a residential street. i wake up and immediately panic, try to start my car, and the battery's dead. so i approach an hispanic guy who's sweeping the parking lot and he finds a woman inside who'll jump my car, but doesn't have cables. so i walk to the walmart grocery store across the street and buy cables so she can jump my car. she jumps my car successfully and then i figure fuck it i'll gets some breakfast sandwiches, so i pull in the drive thru and order some food. as i get to the window i give her an extra $10 for giving me a jump my car overheats and i pull into a parking spot. the hispanic guy and his friend fill up an empty pickle bucket with water and give it to me so i can get home. when i get home i tell my girlfriend that my car broke down twice, i had to walk to get help, my phone was dead, etc etc.
we don't talk anymore, but i would imagine she still doesn't think otherwise about this particular event, even though all my friends know the truth.
Nice day if it doesn't rain.