HPN Movie Series: The Frog Prince (Cannon), Sun @ 2200 EST

Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
Courtney Love, and Marilyn Manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in

Postby Ampersand » Thu Mar 01, 2018 10:40 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION - The Soloist
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Mar 01, 2018 10:58 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION - The Soloist
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Postby Ampersand » Fri Mar 02, 2018 1:03 am

Code: Select all
Ampersand
3

Ampersand
2

Ampersand
1

importantdentist
oh no is there audience participation in this

besoin
is this joe wright's darkest hour

besoin
wokka wokka

louchemouche
wait its not playing for me lol

dan
it didn't win an oscar, but at least it gets a participation trophy

besoin
it's a download, louche

louchemouche
i know lol

dan
hmm

dan
just not opening at all

dan
?

besoin
working for me

besoin
try vlc if you aren't

importantdentist
oh what city is this

besoin
st. louis

Ampersand
might have been a failed download? dropbox has been doing that to me lately

importantdentist
ah nice, the big apple

dan
cartreel?

besoin
i honestly thought this was described audio or whatever for a second there

lhs
is this director commentary

Ampersand
lol

Ampersand
"there i am making 38 million dollars"

Trebbers
Sounds like his mouth is half full

Ampersand
Eric Roberts recorded RDJ's voiceover

lhs
that's one way to microwave a burrito

besoin
cool saab, weirdo

importantdentist
schwarzenegger

besoin
simpler times

lhs
this must be the other side of adrien brody's conversation

besoin
haha

besoin
finally, it's revealed

importantdentist
jesus we never found out the deal with that fuck

importantdentist
weebey.gif

lhs
i know, i'm still pissed off

Trebbers
40%!

besoin
40 seems extremely optimistic

Trebbers
The golden age!

Bob511
Probably shouldn't have moved out of radio, Jimmy.

lhs
14%

importantdentist
do all newsrooms have this old dude with a bowtie

dan
I think thats the number who know what a newspaper is now!

louchemouche
whats happening. is it good

Trebbers
Fuck no

Ampersand
well see

besoin
iron man hit his head

importantdentist
oh it's milton

dan
here come the Rootster

besoin
what a zany newsroom

Trebbers
ah

louchemouche
oh he's gonna get it now

importantdentist
oh no do i hear a soloist

besoin
who is that playing all on their own

louchemouche
it's probably him

importantdentist
i can't remember is this "based on a true story"

besoin
yes

besoin
steve lopez is a real person

Bob511
Kind of hope the twist is that the brain damage is what makes him think Foxx is a talented violinist.

besoin
rdj's character

Trebbers
RDJ running around LA jacked up just makes me wanna watch Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

louchemouche
whats happening now

dan
Foxx is saying every letter of the alphabet

Trebbers
Jamie Foxx is blathering

besoin
ray charles is wearing a visor

Bob511
Oh, then he just stole his hat from Mr. Stevie Wonder?

Ampersand
angel wings on the back of your chair is just so quirky

besoin
audience surrogate

lhs
make one up, templeton

dan
Melt Pot

dan
I think the Trailer Pot Boys did that in season 5

Ampersand
"my dad is a real newshead"

dan
park

importantdentist
wait what is the story

Ampersand
easy, cuz he's full of piss, get it

besoin
why do they need a urine sample

importantdentist
what in the

Trebbers
Maybe there's brain in there

importantdentist
does he have to say the title of his column in his own notes

Trebbers
Between this and The Judge, maybe RDJ is a piss/shit freak

Ampersand
"he's a ...he"

besoin
wish i wasn't watching this with headphones

Trebbers
oh no that hat

louchemouche
aint gotta be a freak to fuck with the fec

lhs
coyote urine tang industry

dan
I dunno, dried coyote urine guy seems like he'd be worth half a column

louchemouche
the saloist!

Trebbers
aha

Bob511
Heh

Trebbers
why does this seem like a good story to him

importantdentist
because he's high on pain meds

Ampersand
maybe his column is titled "Ain't Life a Stinker?"

lhs
he really wants to finally be able to use a broke/baroque pun in his column

Trebbers
"People are Poor Sometimes'

dan
lol lhs

Ampersand
if he was a respectable op-ed columnist he'd be talking to his cab driver like everyone else

importantdentist
haha

importantdentist
the mug

importantdentist
why

Ampersand
"i exploit"

dan
from the John Wayne Bobbit collection

besoin
what a reference, dan

importantdentist
is this a fucking flashback

Trebbers
Wait we get flashbacks

besoin
just out enjoying his mental health

importantdentist
you can't just drop these on us

dan
Paula Abdul is just to the right of the teacher

Ampersand
"kid's got.. talent!"

louchemouche
i feel like the movie's writers are even less invested in story than i am. and i didn't even dl the shit from the damn dropbox

Bob511
Is he watching this flashback on YouTube?

Trebbers
aahh

Trebbers
This flashback looks like 1955

Bob511
Ghost Rider's in town.

importantdentist
i think it's the late 60s

importantdentist
that was a rough time for cleveland

lhs
sick tat

besoin
ken burns letter

Trebbers
This cello causes arthritis

lhs
i want to shares

Trebbers
the fuc

besoin
i don't remember the lady who donated the cello stipulating that he had to go to a home

Trebbers
The acoustics in that tunnel are amazing

lhs
"do you know black hole sun"

dan
haha

importantdentist
coincidentally three other homeless people are playing the same song on violin, viola, and bass just down the way

Bob511
The acoustics are actually terrible, but it's hard to notice through the carbon monoxide poisoning.

dan
unfortunately it seems to be giving RDJ a terrible headache

Ampersand
lol lhs

dan
lets swtich over to these birds as the story with the cellist has kind of played out

Ampersand
maybe it's his brain tumor concussion kicking in, finally

lhs
this is the only way rdj can sleep

Trebbers
Fuck those birds

importantdentist
in a tunnel?

Ampersand
ASMR Homeless Man Inaudible Whispers Then Cellos You To Sleep

Trebbers
haa

dan
so Foxx is like...cellosexual?

lhs
forget it, rdj, it's hamsterdam

besoin
nice situation you've forced him into

Trebbers
"Where do I go to get my exploding collar fitted?"

lhs
rip lafayette

dan
whatthe

importantdentist
this movie has been going on for two hours already right

Trebbers
What the fuck are they doing here

importantdentist
is the rest of the movie just this

Trebbers
Jamie Foxx's understudy

besoin
extremely well maintained neon sign

Ampersand
we've watched two documentaries in a row

Ampersand
a new record

Ampersand
was that...

Ampersand
a bag of piss?

lhs
yes

besoin
coyote piss

besoin
for the raccoons

dan
alright theres definetly something going on re: RDJ and bodily waste

importantdentist
speaking of hamsterdam i just saw the episode of the wire where that same thing just happened

Ampersand
homebrewing lemonade

besoin
"i did it, i white saved him"

importantdentist
does rdj sound a lot like tom hanks to anyone else

Ampersand
yeah i hear it

lhs
thank god for all these vests so we know it's the 70s

besoin
yes, woody?

besoin
that's not a nice thing to say

lhs
hoping for some good reagan-blaming when we get to the 80s flashbacks

importantdentist
yeah that's brutal

Bob511
But...I mean, he needs medication.

lhs
maybe it is we who need medication

dan
the one thing he needs is people to stop telling him he needs medication to get him to people who will tell him he needs medication

dan
I feel like this whole thing would be better if it wasn't real

dan
meaning the movie and the story that it's based on

Ampersand
lol

besoin
i only just realized his hair is supposed to be like beethoven's

lhs
please add that to the imdb trivia page

importantdentist
oh shit

lhs
speaking of imdb, the most relevant keyword is "wearing a traffic cone as a hat"

Ampersand
lol

dan
lmao

importantdentist
can't wait for that scene

dan
do a story about the rats the size of meatloafs man

dan
that's a pulitzer if I ever saw one

dan
AH

Bob511
He's really dead set on that hat, huh?

importantdentist
a what fart?

dan
smooth

dan
none of that freestyle farting

dan
RDJ - "should I be able to hear that?"

lhs
love the parents guide

lhs
"2 'f' words, and 5 uses of the 's' word, and one sob. Jesus Chr*st"

dan
any word on the urine dumping/slipping?

besoin
they went to the party in midnight cowboy

Bob511
Sweet laser light show in The Sunken Place.

dan
and I'm assuming this counts as an orgasm

lhs
surprisingly no

besoin
maybe it's that color machine mr holland made for cole in mr holland's opus

besoin
he patents it in mr holland's opus 2

besoin
the plant in the file box

besoin
*chef kiss*

Bob511
Adam?

Ampersand
THANKS MOM

lhs
praying for a scene of the two of them playing rock band together

importantdentist
why does rdj's job exist

besoin
i have bad news for you realists

besoin
ayers was actually a bassist

besoin
i bet rdj refused to be photographed with a bass

importantdentist
cold, dude

importantdentist
telling a homeless guy you have a house

lhs
watch out, he's kanyeing

besoin
Steve Lopez: [swerving his bicycle to avoid a raccoon] Hey!

lhs
turn off that throbbing gristle album

besoin
turn off the crying baby channel

Ampersand
turn off the movie

lhs
piss sprays out of toilet into his face

Trebbers
ah

besoin
heh

besoin
here i am in this because i was in pride and prejudice which joe wright also directed

lhs
joe wright is now directing... stoner

Ampersand
noooooooooooooo

Ampersand
aghagh

Trebbers
uh

Ampersand
reminding me of that ruined my night

Trebbers
fucked

dan
"that's how they get those sick shows on the crying baby channel"

Trebbers
ah

lhs
heh

lhs
i like this drunk soothsayer

Bob511
Maybe print journalism should go under.

Trebbers
Get her put on a 14 day hold

besoin
why did they make catherine keener do that

lhs
do raccoons even do that

Ampersand
queer eye for the homeless guy

importantdentist
that was quick

Ampersand
"i bathed in piss. presto: no more nerves"

importantdentist
this seems a little much

Trebbers
*Takes mallet and watermelon from cello case*

Ampersand
lol

lhs
this is someone's fetish

lhs
he enrolled in hogwarts

Trebbers
ahahahh

besoin
the mayor lied!

besoin
did his eyebrows just turn white

lhs
yeah

besoin
boy is he upset

Trebbers
ACTING!

besoin
i think this house is worth more than the LA times at this point

Bob511
RDJ really wants that part in Suicide Squad 2

Trebbers
srsly

lhs
"i was crawling around in the tar pits in case you got stuck in there"

Trebbers
aha

Bob511
"That's not the kind of soap you use, Nate."

besoin
this is quiptonite

lhs
who won the fight, i had to go afk

Trebbers
Foxx

Bob511
Saves Tronc one severance package, I guess.

besoin
so many pools

Ampersand
still crazy after all these years

lhs
conductor puts on traffic cone hat

Ampersand
"he has much better hats now"

importantdentist
he is not condducting this music

lhs
seriously where was the traffic cone

dan
I'm just happy that we finally got to see Ayers rock.

besoin
maybe in the director's cut

Trebbers
...

Ampersand
the healing power of dance

besoin
they literally made these homeless people dance for the movie

importantdentist
i feel like this movie was very much "sure homeless people are terrible but look, some of them are good because they can bring us pleasure"

importantdentist
i.e. they did not earn this scene at all

besoin
welp

Bob511
They Did Not Earn This Scene At All: The Joe Wright Story

besoin
maybe we'll get some crazy creditz

besoin
like a key grip named blabbo or something

Ampersand
the homeless quartet continues playing as this ship sinks
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Postby Ampersand » Fri Mar 02, 2018 5:09 pm

Sunday at the Shit Flixe:
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Postby donna martin » Fri Mar 02, 2018 5:46 pm

wait, is the sequel to billy madison?
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Postby Ampersand » Sat Mar 03, 2018 3:20 pm

Ampersand wrote:Sunday at the Shit Flixe:
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Mar 04, 2018 2:11 pm

TONIGHT!
Check the board dropbox for the movie
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Mar 04, 2018 5:31 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT!
Check the board dropbox for the movie
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Mar 04, 2018 9:00 pm

Two hours until showtime!
Come watch 2007's Academy Award Winner for Best Wig!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Mar 04, 2018 10:39 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION - Reign Over Me
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Postby Bride of Qualls » Sun Mar 04, 2018 10:41 pm

get the fuck in.
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Mar 04, 2018 10:56 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION - Reign Over Me
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Postby Ampersand » Mon Mar 05, 2018 1:14 am

Code: Select all
Ampersand
3

Ampersand
2

Ampersand
1

louchemouche
let me know when 20

importantdentist
is that sandler's new production house

importantdentist
we're already at 50

dan
you want 1:20?

dan
1:20

louchemouche
give me 2

Animefilm
I cant believe Sandler was in a PTA film before

dan
he ripped in that though

donnamartin
wow, he really got for real actors in this

Animefilm
In an alternate universe, id like to believe he went on to doing more art house stuff

donnamartin
this seems liek a good time for a taco break

dan
he still had spanglish to come after this

dan
and The Meyerowitz Stories

importantdentist
and grown ups 2

dan
and that movie where he jerks off too much

louchemouche
2 mins?

Ampersand
let's do Jack & Jill

dan
we're at 3:40

Ampersand
what time do you want, louche?

Animefilm
Is it just me, or is the audio off

louchemouche
5?

importantdentist
5 in 30

donnamartin
man, how often are you this

Ampersand
4:45

dan
tryin to get drilled by Don C

Ampersand
5

donnamartin
dan, you know you would try

Trebbers
No sexual energy in the dentist office please

importantdentist
this is already very different from what i was expecting

louchemouche
ok, the towers are falling?

dan
I'd have like the top 6 buttons undone if I was going to see Cheadle

Trebbers
Gets him home and realizes he's not Terrance Howard

Trebbers
A what?

louchemouche
8 min now is that way off?

importantdentist
u good

dan
no, that's good

donnamartin
good way to shut your kids up

LowercaseTea
my computer got a little fucked. Can y'all let me know when you hit 15?

importantdentist
we're not quite at 10

Trebbers
You got about 5 minutes till

Trebbers
Don Don'd

donnamartin
am i too irrisistable to be a dentist?

LowercaseTea
is 11:30 right?

donnamartin
wait i missed it, who is she?

dan
in 10 seconds

Animefilm
its 11:20

importantdentist
1130 now

dan
11:30

LowercaseTea
thanks

dan
somehow this could is even more boring than the one in the Replica trailer

Trebbers
Love that what's happening is soul crushing, but it has the Toe Jam & Earl soundtrack

dan
*couple

Animefilm
Soul crushing? his puzzle making?

lhs
a jigsaw puzzle sounds fun as hell, not soul crushing

louchemouche
"baby they blew up my family and shit"

importantdentist
wait allan johnson?

Animefilm
We slept naked *

Animefilm
he looks like bob dylan

importantdentist
yeah i thought that in the trailer

dan
"but they all taste the same"

Trebbers
ahah

Animefilm
Didnt expect him to have a house with a nice record collection and video games

Trebbers
Yeah, seems high functioning at first glance

LowercaseTea
This scene really predicted Let's Plays

Trebbers
*finds bodies of homeowners*

Animefilm
I hope they jam, like in the good old days

louchemouche
teeth are weirdly monolithic/directing into strange atavistic feelings/dreams, etc. i wonder that it's a coincidence that our protagonist is a dentist

Ampersand
what

Trebbers
what

donnamartin
what

Animefilm
what

donnamartin
no wait for real. what

Ampersand
towers rising

Animefilm
lol^

Trebbers
Done Cheadle

donnamartin
lol

Animefilm
what if she needed to find another dentist because of insurance or something

Trebbers
hey now

Animefilm
this is a fun wacky indie movie

importantdentist
how long were they riding

LowercaseTea
Oh shit guys. It's punx night

Trebbers
hahahahaha

dan
Hunx and his Punx really changed their sound

Animefilm
is this charlie's midlife crisis?

LowercaseTea
"Booce"

lhs
it reminded me of the lone rangers

importantdentist
that's a good question actually

donnamartin
honestly, this is just billy madison age 45

dan
would be a better dramatic scene if he wasn't using the same voice as the STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAN scene from Billy Madison

Animefilm
that was a good root beer wasted

Trebbers
yep

lhs
STOP LOOKING AT ME DON

dan
haha

LowercaseTea
Just a simple man's quest to never seek treatment for a traumatic loss

louchemouche
can you use the planes again

Animefilm
did they say that his family was lost in 9/11? I missed that part

Trebbers
Wait, did his family die in 9/11

dan
sweet tooth tie Banks

Trebbers
And with so much hair

dan
I don't mean the clown from Twisted Metal, I just mean it's a good tie

dan
have to clarify

Trebbers
"You need to make this go away. Let her do what she wants"

importantdentist
john and johnson huh

Trebbers
Guy on the left

LowercaseTea
I feel like this was the number one influence on Collateral Beauty

importantdentist
is the payout enough of a reason to involve 9/11 in this

Animefilm
i think they flew from florida actually

lhs
a blode up family = maximum audience sympathy

dan
this accountant better be DeVito level short they way she keeps hyping it up

LowercaseTea
Ah yes, solid call back to a moment 3 minutes ago

dan
this is basically an episode of My Wife and Kids

dan
some sort of fixation with her mouth, I don't know what you would call it

donnamartin
this whole sexual harrassment dental issue is ...odd, right?

Animefilm
a bit

dan
whoa

louchemouche
planes killed his whole family

LowercaseTea
real missed moment for Sandler to say "to tell you the tooth"

Trebbers
ahah

donnamartin
lol

dan
but on the plus side, he got to see Don Cheadle's wang

Trebbers
The Net?

lhs
oscar takes his dick out

Animefilm
i think only his wife died, his parents died before

dan
is there gonna be like a big showdown when the lady who wants to give him a bj comes back?

Animefilm
oh nvm

dan
is it gonna be like High Noon?

Animefilm
a samurai showdown

LowercaseTea
all professional therapists diagnose after a 2 sentence description

Animefilm
his expression there

donnamartin
i'd argue don has bad taste in music

Trebbers
oh no

LowercaseTea
Adam Sandler has like 3 metaphors for how well he's doing

Trebbers
Jammin and jammin and jammin

donnamartin
i'd argue this is where the movie goes off the rails

donnamartin
but was it ever on it?

Animefilm
thats pretend jamming

donnamartin
this is rude to The Boss

donnamartin
would you say they're Pretenders?

importantdentist
ah welp

Trebbers
This killed Clarence Clemons

Animefilm
womb mates

importantdentist
she has a "01.20.09 end of an error" sticker

Animefilm
chinese food is a cliche for slobby people in films

LowercaseTea
Why does all the music sound like royalty free music

LowercaseTea
I think the composer of this movie was "Creative Commons"

Trebbers
Movie is over two hours long and that scene had to stay

importantdentist
whoa

Trebbers
what

Ampersand
please, quit saying it

donnamartin
everyone stop saying it

donnamartin
none of this is funny

Trebbers
Don't say poundcake or pickle either

Animefilm
2007 is aging poorly

donnamartin
most of the aughts, really

LowercaseTea
Jesus Christ how much of this movie is them watching or doing something more entertaining than the movie itself

Animefilm
ok, you cant just make your movie better by putting in scenes from other hood movies

Animefilm
good

Animefilm
**

dan
"another Dracula Dead and Loving It? We can only dream"

importantdentist
ahhhhhh

dan
hate when this happens

Trebbers
"She's saying it's all your fault"

Animefilm
He died of watching too much movies

Animefilm
and not going to bed on time

importantdentist
i can't believe how little of this movie has passed

LowercaseTea
well clearly the people to blame is Adam Sandler and Mel Brooks

LowercaseTea
*are

donnamartin
dear fucking lord, there's 1:18 left

dan
"What the big deal, just strike him with lightning and it'll be fine"

Ampersand
"xbox is waiting"

lhs
is this the movie where adam sandler is the devil

Trebbers
Sandler killing his father backfired

Animefilm
TFW your friends dont want to hang

importantdentist
that's every sandler movie

louchemouche
product placement in this movie would've been incredible

Trebbers
Here we go

dan
"Ah, I was searching for you"

Animefilm
'cool'

dan
"Just because he sings all his songs in a baby voice you don't have to be mean"

Trebbers
Shadow of the Colossus" ost on vinyl

LowercaseTea
hahaha

LowercaseTea
How hype do you think Fineman was for the HD remake?

Animefilm
Stop with the dad rock

donnamartin
i think adam sandler as a dentist might be the least believable part

dan
you don't miss all the excitement of Dentistry

Trebbers
come on

dan
I ran the numbers and just mathematically, theres no way this can go on more than 10 more minutes

LowercaseTea
hahaha

donnamartin
this or you, dan

louchemouche
planes, please punish whomever wrote this movie

Trebbers
Got some real bad news for you

LowercaseTea
I'm out y'all. Enjoy the rest of this

Animefilm
Ah take care

dan
Operamannnnnn bye-BYEEEEEEEEE

Animefilm
He has an eames chair in his office

Trebbers
fuck

donnamartin
i can do this quick, top selling point

donnamartin
what do we want to bet she wasn't married to him, she was just stalking a guy

Animefilm
what is the point of this side plot

Ampersand
isn't this the A plot?

dan
I think this is the BJ plot

donnamartin
there's a plot?

Ampersand
lolololol dan

donnamartin
haha dan

importantdentist
what if that's actually sandler's wife

Trebbers
What

louchemouche
there's a too big tie, i know that

dan
weird Sex in the City music over half this movie

donnamartin
I had to ask myself, could I really give a BJ to a dentist?

importantdentist
the dog was on the plane??

donnamartin
plot twist

Trebbers
The dog was one of the hijackers

louchemouche
for a second i thought that was the breaking bad guy that blew up those planes

donnamartin
i knew it was an inside job

Animefilm
the poodle plot

louchemouche
ok, it actually is him

Trebbers
oh shit

Trebbers
I LOVE THIS STUFF

dan
"you should come over and smell my collection some time"

Animefilm
They should pick up a copy of animal collective's strawberry jam

donnamartin
charlie read a few nick hornby novels

lhs
he collects paint chips

donnamartin
i might disagree with this take

donnamartin
on segar anyway

Ampersand
shrink salad

Ampersand
shrink wrap is a good insult

dan
you don't want to get caught in the pit at a Seger concert

donnamartin
he really likes the word dork

Animefilm
shrink wrapped in a segar concert

jpeen
lotta dudes getting asskicked at the seeger tour 2013

dan
people will lose an arm in there

louchemouche
for real though, you can turtle neck on a normie. that's a thing you can do

Animefilm
''thats sick''

Trebbers
Get this fucking guy out of the office

importantdentist
weird

Trebbers
Seems dangerous

Animefilm
this is a weird scene

donnamartin
shouldn't he focus on the procedure?

dan
"I really need help..I'm gonna go buy the strategy guide"

Trebbers
ahah

lhs
heh

lhs
i knew it!

donnamartin
use of the work 'dork' is really bugging me here

Trebbers
what

dan
come the fuck on

Trebbers
Sandman and her are an item

Animefilm
I feel like sandler hand selected the casting choices

louchemouche
you fucking know he did dude

donnamartin
sandler's like two seconds from "she's asking for it"

lhs
swimmin pools

Animefilm
So the plane crash put him on the spectrum?

dan
I think you just wrote the best possible summary of this film animefilm

donnamartin
there was an outbreak of autism after 9/11

sideshowraheem
time?

importantdentist
1.15.10

Trebbers
oof

lhs
>:(

donnamartin
honestly i think charlie should have been on that plane

donnamartin
he and the poodle could change places

sideshowraheem
gimme 1:17

lhs
adam sandler should have been on that plane

dan
you're missing the big action sequence

Ampersand
titular mope

dan
1:17;00

importantdentist
117

Animefilm
1:17

sideshowraheem
thanks guys

sideshowraheem
oh Liv Tyler is in this

sideshowraheem
his family died in 9/11 have i missed anything else?

louchemouche
she was, planes got her

Animefilm
Did she wear a giant frumpy sweater on purpose

lhs
don cheadle is an irresistible dentist

dan
Sandler rides a scooter and hates the phonies

donnamartin
tell it to your live journal

lhs
is the 9/11 part supposed to be unrevealed at this point

sideshowraheem
uhhh

Trebbers
...

Ampersand
jesus

importantdentist
cheadle why

donnamartin
ugh, again with that

donnamartin
we stopped saying that before 2007

sideshowraheem
one was 9 one was 11

Ampersand
i'm glad Falcon was responsible for his spine damage in Civil War

Animefilm
cheadle is picking up on charlie's vocab

sideshowraheem
what the hell

Trebbers
"You know, the last thing I said to them is 'I hope you all die in a hijacking'!'

donnamartin
very female?

dan
TBS: Very Female

sideshowraheem
ahaha dan

Trebbers
42 minutes left

donnamartin
WHAT THE HELL

Trebbers
gimness

donnamartin
what could possibly happen to cover 42 minutes

dan
He was rewatching Robin Hood Men in Tights when the first plane hit

Trebbers
Cheadle gets that beej

Animefilm
Ah geez, the easter puppy went by faster than this

sideshowraheem
"they met me in New York instead"

Trebbers
Is this a meandering Norm MacDonald style joke?

dan
"and then he shouted Baba Booey, Baba Booey"

Trebbers
ahah

Animefilm
how come every plot in films about kids off screen has to be related to disneyland

Trebbers
"I saw my dog falling from the sky"

Animefilm
"charlie i was just trying to enjoy my comic''

lhs
extremely long and incredibly gross

importantdentist
nice

donnamartin
aha

dan
did he have that on TiVo?

importantdentist
nice job don

louchemouche
bullshit representation of inpatient experience

sideshowraheem
oh shit he's gonna kill Bin Laden

dan
The Silver Bullet Man

Trebbers
ah

dan
overlay the Robocop score on this

Trebbers
yeah

lhs
the robe budget for this movie is insane

Animefilm
chawlie

sideshowraheem
Robe-o Cop

dan
is he gonna go shoot Bruce Springsteen?

dan
nice raheem

sideshowraheem
he's going to shoot the cops because they didn't save his wife?

Trebbers
The punch line is that these cops dont care

sideshowraheem
suicide by taxi

donnamartin
finally, an audience surrogat

dan
Im in a toaster?

Ampersand
he's got that white man's burden

Animefilm
Today, they would shoot

donnamartin
no he's still white

sideshowraheem
if it was Cheadle the movie would have ended

jpeen
then, they would shoot

Trebbers
what

lhs
jesus more robes

Animefilm
his sentence was mandatory dental cleaning

sideshowraheem
"you are hereby sentenced to stop looking like 60s Bob Dylan"

Trebbers
can I get time

sideshowraheem
Go Get Chinese now was Sandlers least successful film and was criticized by several human rights groups

Animefilm
1:37:15

sideshowraheem
I've only been watching this for 20 minutes but this movie clearly hates women

Trebbers
Thanks

donnamartin
oh very much raheem

donnamartin
now imagine you're the rest of us

importantdentist
funny people eh

Animefilm
Watching this movie, makes me feel i learned enough about sandler to know he is a bad human

importantdentist
wiki tells me sandler and cheadle were originally cruise and bardem, respectively

Trebbers
whoah

donnamartin
what

importantdentist
imagine your dentist being javier bardem

sideshowraheem
that's impossible imp

dan
"You want me to fix your fucking TEETH? what do I look like, a dentist?!

donnamartin
that makes less sense than this

Animefilm
Oh I thought this was directed by sandler, woops

lhs
someone's fucking around with that wiki article

sideshowraheem
"I screamed 'Mohammed Atta will be redeemed by history' at her"

Trebbers
"Hated listening to Kitchen Talk on NPR, even though she loved it"

donnamartin
ladies, amiright?

sideshowraheem
is that Mike?

lhs
yeah

dan
yeah STELTER

Trebbers
Whacked around

sideshowraheem
this is our biggest criticism of doctors being held accountable for their actions since Patch Adams

donnamartin
oh god why'd you bring that up?

Trebbers
Roll credits

donnamartin
there's 20 ore minutes?

sideshowraheem
Donald!

sideshowraheem
whoa

dan
the stars are out tonight folks!

importantdentist
ryan

Ampersand
lol

donnamartin
bj novack's haircut

sideshowraheem
this cast

Trebbers
One actual BJ in the film

importantdentist
haha

lhs
heh

dan
lol

donnamartin
why does this woman keep showing up?

sideshowraheem
is that his dead wife?

importantdentist
objection your honor

Animefilm
shes his therapist

Animefilm
wait why is that lady there

lhs
character witness

sideshowraheem
"my wife"

importantdentist
"charlie bit my finger"

Trebbers
ahah

importantdentist
adam sandler's lawyer is Jon Spamm

Animefilm
family court

Trebbers
MIL going to be the one committed

Animefilm
wait, so this trial isnt about the taxi driver?

donnamartin
jesus, bj novak is a prick

sideshowraheem
this is creepy

importantdentist
would be interesting to have had any character development on the DA before literally right now

donnamartin
why is this necessary?

Animefilm
to torment sandler

sideshowraheem
"we have to demonstrate that this man loves Springsteen more than his family your honor"

dan
*starts air drumming*

importantdentist
is there actually a three strikes rule in the judicial system

lhs
he really needs to stop with this baby voice

importantdentist
like in a trial

Animefilm
*convulses into air guitar*

sideshowraheem
BJ Novak is a psycho

Trebbers
ahahhah

sideshowraheem
ahahahah

dan
jesus

sideshowraheem
title of the movie!

sideshowraheem
but he was listening to The Who, I assumed it would be a Legal Matter

Trebbers
aha

lhs
pulling a gun on cops is a family matter

donnamartin
lol

dan
lol

Animefilm
heh

dan
is Cheadle gonna adopt Sandler?

Animefilm
"this man has a taste in music that is profound"

Ampersand
"now come here" *extends tongue at camera, leans in*

lhs
oh no

Trebbers
ah

sideshowraheem
little girl? she was an adult with children

Trebbers
"And kiss me square on the lips"

lhs
brown sugarman?

sideshowraheem
Searching for Brain Sugarman

sideshowraheem
didn't realize that was a spinoff of this movie

Trebbers
ah

Animefilm
Sugarman is the actual director of the movie

Animefilm
thats weird

lhs
the only man crazy enough to accept this hummer

donnamartin
i feel like i'm in a kids movie when he uses this accent

Animefilm
An accent that only comes from sandler, and no one else in the world

jpeen
need a youtube of "look at a german shepherd see a god damn poodle!"

sideshowraheem
I feel like he should be threatening conditioner in every scene of this movie

importantdentist
ten minutes of credits please

sideshowraheem
call off the dogs of a mental health system trying ot help a fucked up person

Trebbers
What

sideshowraheem
Big John's oving

sideshowraheem
M

Animefilm
The video gaming blog Kotaku praised Reign Over Me's inclusion of the video game Shadow of the Colossus, stating that it "must be one of the first Hollywood films, if not the first, to deal with games thematically and intelligently."[6]

Trebbers
oh lord

sideshowraheem
ahahaha

dan
I called it!

Ampersand
loooool

donnamartin
what happened to don's wife?

lhs
nice blog, idiots

importantdentist
really what is the deal with this lady

sideshowraheem
she's not a dead woman so this movie has no respect for her donna

sideshowraheem
a 6 pack of glass bottle barqs? what is the 50s?

Trebbers
Sandler has been on the first stage for 12 months

Animefilm
This movie is weird about women

importantdentist
this movie is weird

donnamartin
the colonel?

jpeen
oh god the colonel

sideshowraheem
I want that life sized Col Sanders porceline statue

donnamartin
Sandler's family was a big fan of KFC

jpeen
well that explains his sexual frustration, at least

donnamartin
it's his memorial

importantdentist
colonel sandler

donnamartin
aha

Animefilm
Just sit on the couch

dan
big missed opportunity not having Rob Schnieder voice Colonel Sanders for a gag

sideshowraheem
a woman awkwardly watching two dudes play video games? what is this my freshman dorm?

Trebbers
Why is this lady apologizing

sideshowraheem
"I probably don't tell you that enough"-The writer's wife in the writer's mind

donnamartin
so he left the apartment and moved across town?

donnamartin
oh fuck you movie

dan
The Sandler has become the Sandled

donnamartin
fuck you movie fuck you

importantdentist
he's gonna die riding that thing at night

sideshowraheem
this was the period where Eddie Vedder had a song on every sound track

donnamartin
2 hours 20 minutes for this shit?

Ampersand
couldn't have turned the volume down quicker

Ampersand
maybe we don't need to celebrate Oscars season anymore

sideshowraheem
I feel like I got enough of that

importantdentist
yeah that was a rough couple of picks

lhs
the terrorists have won after all

donnamartin
this was nominated for an oscar?

Animefilm
I think im good on sandler for long long time

sideshowraheem
Detachment was legit incredible

Ampersand
yeah i loved Detachment

importantdentist
detachment was at least like a car wreck

Ampersand
but that's a different league of misguided

importantdentist
this and the last one i've already forgotten were like whateverr the extremely boring version of a car wreck is

dan
this would have been more fun if it were a car wreck

Animefilm
It still had some creative merit that was coming from a good place

Ampersand
regardless, we made it through

dan
it was more like a car slowly scraping the side of another car at 3 mph
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Postby Ampersand » Mon Mar 05, 2018 10:21 pm

So, a problem: James Nguyen's REPLICA is only available with non-removable Rifftrax audio.

We could:

a) accept this and watch REPLICA anyway
b) watch a different James Nguyen film, Julie & Jack:

c) watch something else entirely.

Lemme know itt.
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Postby Bob511 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 10:38 pm

Replica is on Amazon Prime, so I imagine a rip could be requested on PtP. Probably wouldn't happen in time for Thursday, but I don't think there's any reason to compromise with a riffed copy.
universe, you can't play the willfully ignorant, but partisan bleeding heart
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Postby dan » Mon Mar 05, 2018 11:03 pm

Watching with riffs on would kind of defeat the purpose. As long as Julie and Jack seems interesting (which I think it sort of does but this is not the easiest thing to read) that seems like it would be fine.
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Postby animefilm » Mon Mar 05, 2018 11:46 pm













Some suggestions
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Postby lefthandshake » Mon Mar 05, 2018 11:57 pm

all three cruel intentionses
Image
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Postby Bob511 » Tue Mar 06, 2018 12:11 am

animefilm wrote:Some suggestions

I think we've done all of those but Sorority Babes.
universe, you can't play the willfully ignorant, but partisan bleeding heart
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Postby Bob511 » Tue Mar 06, 2018 12:15 am

Someone on PtP already filled my request on Replica, for what it's worth.
universe, you can't play the willfully ignorant, but partisan bleeding heart
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Postby animefilm » Tue Mar 06, 2018 12:25 am

Bob511 wrote:
animefilm wrote:Some suggestions

I think we've done all of those but Sorority Babes.


Ah yeah I figured they've been watched. Darn :(
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Postby Ampersand » Tue Mar 06, 2018 1:12 am

Bob511 wrote:Someone on PtP already filled my request on Replica, for what it's worth.


Heck yes. Replica is back on, folks!

And we will certainly do Sorority Babes. I've had it on the calendar a few times, and we sure do love our DeCoteau 'round these parts.

And then all three Cruel Intentions back to back to back.

And then why not the Wild Things sequels too.

Wow, we are back in action.
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Postby donna martin » Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:32 pm

that's quite a lot of sexy teen drama to unleash all at once.
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Mar 08, 2018 12:48 pm

TONIGHT @ 2200 EST:
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Postby churrokbyme » Thu Mar 08, 2018 3:08 pm

Hey have you done a Bollywood night? I want to watch Bahubaali 1 & 2, figured it would be more fun watching it with others.
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Mar 08, 2018 5:05 pm

We haven't done any Bollywood, actually. I wouldn't know where to start, really, and the inflated running times make me wary.
Are there any that aren't nearly 3 hours long?

And:
Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT @ 2200 EST:
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Postby churrokbyme » Thu Mar 08, 2018 6:06 pm

Ampersand wrote:We haven't done any Bollywood, actually. I wouldn't know where to start, really, and the inflated running times make me wary.
Are there any that aren't nearly 3 hours long?


Well shoot, I'm looking through all the classics and they are all well over 2 hours.
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Mar 08, 2018 8:54 pm

Two hours until showtime!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Mar 08, 2018 10:06 pm

Because tonight's movie is just over an hour, we're going to livestream a bonus short prior to it, featuring the return of a much loved Shit Flixe superstar.
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Mar 08, 2018 10:41 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION - REPLICA
Image
https://tinychat.com/room/hpnmovieseries

password: hipinion
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