HPN Movie Series: Chill Factor (Skeet/Cuba), Thur @ 2200 EST

Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
Courtney Love, and Marilyn Manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in

Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 11, 2018 6:09 pm

Ampersand wrote:
Ampersand wrote:Sleepwalkers is TONIGHT!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 11, 2018 8:48 pm

About an hour and a half until showtime!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 11, 2018 9:48 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Sleepwalkers
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 11, 2018 10:03 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Sleepwalkers
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 11, 2018 11:47 pm

Code: Select all
[22:13] <Ampurrsand> 3
[22:13] <Ampurrsand> 2
[22:13] <Ampurrsand> 1
[22:13] <Ampurrsand> much better turnout tonight than the last time we tried this
[22:13] <besoin> put madchen amick on the screen
[22:14] <Ampurrsand> Coathe & Chill
[22:14] <Trebbers> broke my speakers
[22:14] <autarch> "i only eat virgins"
[22:14] <besoin> damn, enya right out of the gate
[22:14] <laserkitty> if this movie doesn't have cat scratch fever in it i'm rioting
[22:14] <lhs> my cat jumped at that
[22:14] <ratbags> these guys dont look like cops
[22:14] <impdentist> madchen is pronounced similar to "makin'" but i learned from a twin peaks special feature that david lynch is constitutionally unable to pronounce it as anything other than "madgekin"
[22:14] <laserkitty> oh wow this is just brad pitt with aging makeup
[22:14] <bob511> It's Mark
[22:14] <ratbags> one looks like he runs a deli and the other is a drug dealer
[22:14] <ohitsmax_> NOOOOOOO
[22:15] <donnamartin> YEAOOOOOOOOOO
[22:15] <Ampurrsand> Mark Hamill in normal face makeup
[22:15] <donnamartin> won't' get fooled again starts up
[22:15] <impdentist> i have a bad.... feline about this
[22:15] <impdentist> YEEEEAAAAHHHHHH
[22:15] <Ampurrsand> lol
[22:15] <besoin> this guy took like 729 lives
[22:15] <dan2_> nice dentist
[22:15] <donnamartin> L&O: Special Feline Unit
[22:16] <donnamartin> aha
[22:16] <autarch> meeYOW!
[22:16] <ohitsmax_> i hope this movie is about cats seeking revenge for this crime
[22:16] <kaykewalkers> unclear who screamed there
[22:16] <dan2_> maybe it's a cat suicide cult
[22:16] <donnamartin> oh i would love it if it was just a band of detective cats
[22:16] <autarch> what was the crime? I haven't been paying attenti0on
[22:16] <lhs> extra strength cat litter strikes again
[22:16] <Ampurrsand> Mark Hamill to Stephen King: "I fundamentally disagree about the choices you've made with my character"
[22:16] <laserkitty> D-S-A. D-S-A.
[22:16] <donnamartin> it's a crime against our minds
[22:17] <ratbags> roses are red
[22:17] <ratbags> violets are blue
[22:17] <ratbags> that kid is dead and you will be too
[22:17] <autarch> sleepwalkers are scary
[22:17] <Trebbers> I hope that title stinger comes back a few more times
[22:17] <lhs> oh good this is going to be another movie with whispered dialog and extremely loud sound effects, huh
[22:17] <autarch> and they're coming for you
[22:17] <impdentist> ron!
[22:17] <besoin> this is like the opening to mannequin
[22:17] <bob511> Oh, we're just watching Catwoman again.
[22:17] <autarch> ratbags, I was completing your poem, did you see?
[22:17] <ratbags> stephen king was like
[22:18] <besoin> is that captain morgan
[22:18] <kaykewalkers> cat boobs
[22:18] <ratbags> "i made st. bernards terrifying now i must do kitties"
[22:18] <Ampurrsand> Stephen King thinks cats have two boobs
[22:18] <donnamartin> amatuer
[22:18] <ratbags> thats the coke doing the thinking
[22:18] <kaykewalkers> kitty titties
[22:18] <autarch> wait, are cats sleepwalkers?
[22:18] <dan2_> rare banned Far Side cartoon
[22:18] <Trebbers> eyes are folling me
[22:18] <autarch> I don't know anything about this movie
[22:18] <ratbags> cats kill sleepwalkers
[22:18] <laserkitty> bitch i'm a cat. bitch i'm a cat. i'm not a cow. i'm not that fat.
[22:18] <impdentist> they're always walking around when i'm sleeping
[22:19] <autarch> like someone who actually sleepwalks?
[22:19] <kaykewalkers> sleepwalkers ARE cats but also allergic to cats, it's complicated
[22:19] <Ampurrsand> back then, photos took so long to take that you could transform into a cat while waiting
[22:19] <besoin> sure, that's indiana
[22:19] <autarch> cats kill people who sleepwalk?
[22:19] <autarch> anyone know the name of this tune?
[22:19] <lhs> how is this not maine
[22:19] <impdentist> is that a joke
[22:19] <donnamartin> maybe the sleepwalkers have a fight club with cats
[22:19] <ratbags> of course there's cats in BODEGA bay
[22:19] <kaykewalkers> there he is
[22:19] <laserkitty> meanwhile, in this deleted scene from a patrick swayze film,
[22:19] <Trebbers> That is not cool
[22:19] <kaykewalkers> tits out
[22:20] <impdentist> ah yes, classic
[22:20] <donnamartin> oh man he's one cool cat
[22:20] <Trebbers> edgy
[22:20] <ratbags> hey man dont do that
[22:20] <Ampurrsand> cats are into self harm
[22:20] <autarch> please don't do a swastika
[22:20] <besoin> M-I-L-K
[22:20] <Ampurrsand> lol
[22:20] <lhs> anarchy
[22:20] <kaykewalkers> pi
[22:20] <ratbags> T is for titties?
[22:20] <autarch> T for tits
[22:20] <autarch> damnit ratbags
[22:20] <Trebbers> TONYA
[22:20] <kaykewalkers> harding
[22:20] <autarch> tonya harding
[22:20] <ratbags> autarch youre too slow tonight
[22:20] <Ampurrsand> this cat has a real fucked up face
[22:20] <Trebbers> "Hello, there, welcome to the movie"
[22:20] <ratbags> why dont you go to bed
[22:20] <Ampurrsand> i love it
[22:20] <donnamartin> oh is this like hocus pocus and the cat talks?
[22:21] <autarch> this happened during ryan's babe too.
[22:21] <kaykewalkers> I just watched Hocus Pocus!
[22:21] <ohitsmax_> idk if i can watch this if cats are being harmed
[22:21] <ratbags> why are they trapping cats
[22:21] <donnamartin> what
[22:21] <kaykewalkers> this is a mother son dance
[22:21] <autarch> guy looks like dennis wilson
[22:21] <kaykewalkers> like normal moms and sons dance
[22:21] <dan2_> I think by 1992 you could no longer maim cats for your movie in America
[22:21] <laserkitty> NOT mom dances with clueless son
[22:22] <ratbags> is he gonna bang his mom
[22:22] <impdentist> "ah man no mice??"
[22:22] <bob511> You guys joke, but...
[22:22] <dan2_> I mean you could traumatize them, but if you take some skin off they'll stop you
[22:22] <impdentist> wait i keep forgetting he's not a cat
[22:22] <kaykewalkers> he looks kind of like a cat
[22:22] <dan2_> Perlman also looked like a cat when he played the Beast
[22:22] <impdentist> true
[22:22] <kaykewalkers> rule 1: don't ask people out at work
[22:22] <dan2_> they're grabbing up all the cat-like actors
[22:22] <Ampurrsand> feral cats commit incest constantly, btw
[22:22] <donnamartin> is this his mom?
[22:22] <Ampurrsand> just sayin'
[22:23] <dan2_> I thought this song was like 2:20 long
[22:23] <donnamartin> um, amp are you an expert in feral cat mating?
[22:23] <besoin> i swear they have this shirt at madewell right now
[22:23] <ohitsmax_> is this the 12" cut of sleepwalk
[22:23] <dan2_> like every 50's song
[22:23] <ratbags> hes gonna fuck his mom
[22:23] <autarch> this is actually well shot.
[22:23] <Ampurrsand> cats like to fuck. these are FACTS
[22:23] <impdentist> ah ok
[22:23] <autarch> weird folks though
[22:23] <kaykewalkers> normal mom son stuff
[22:23] <kaykewalkers> thanks, stephen
[22:24] <laserkitty> listen when you're a sleepwalker fucking your mom isn't just okay it's expected
[22:24] <Trebbers> Got a bug zapper in the bedroom
[22:24] <besoin> they're watching purple rain
[22:24] <ratbags> does it always glow like that when youre fucking your mom
[22:24] <laserkitty> who are we to judge
[22:24] <impdentist> is "also" usually how marquees distinguish between the titles of a double feature
[22:24] <Ampurrsand> "Cats do not share the same taboos about incest as humans do, and if they are not spayed or neutered, closely related cats will mate. Inbreeding can lead to higher rates of genetic problems. Spay or neuter your cats before they are 6 months old in order to prevent this."
[22:24] <ohitsmax_> LMAO
[22:24] <autarch> I love this song
[22:24] <kaykewalkers> a bop
[22:24] <donnamartin> thanks bob barker
[22:25] <besoin> it's all 50s, 60s, and enya in this movie
[22:25] <autarch> work work
[22:25] <ohitsmax_> ok it's worth it for this omg
[22:25] <ohitsmax_> truly a treasure
[22:25] <autarch> hope every scene has a dance
[22:25] <kaykewalkers> I'd ask her out too
[22:25] <Ampurrsand> hoping she follows it up with Taking Care of Business
[22:25] <donnamartin> i prefer this over mother fucking
[22:25] <impdentist> she needs better hair support mechanisms
[22:25] <donnamartin> i don't thinki she's really cleaning that carpet
[22:25] <lhs> nowwww that iiiii kill caaaats
[22:25] <autarch> yeah, she seems cool and not mom-like
[22:26] <ratbags> dancing while cleaning in movies was a big thing in this era
[22:26] <donnamartin> oh no my swifer ad stopped
[22:26] <kaykewalkers> and in my life
[22:26] <dan2_> the framed photo of the hot dogs is the most unsettling thing in this so far
[22:26] <ratbags> "do you wanna fuck me and my mom?"
[22:26] <impdentist> is dr pepper ok
[22:26] <besoin> mr. pibb was your first hint he's deranged
[22:26] <bob511> A medium Moxie, dude.
[22:26] <Ampurrsand> "tell me about your SLUSH"
[22:26] <Trebbers> ahah bob
[22:27] <impdentist> he already has large moxie
[22:27] <bob511> "...are you sure that's in Ohio?"
[22:27] <laserkitty> 'listen ... whatever they say ... i am NOT from twin peaks'
[22:27] <autarch> wait. is  that shelley johnson?
[22:27] <laserkitty> yes
[22:27] <ratbags> yees
[22:27] <besoin> autarch
[22:27] <besoin> pack it in
[22:27] <Ampurrsand> "Paradise Falls... y'know, east of Eden?"
[22:27] <ratbags> autarch go home, you're drunk
[22:27] <kaykewalkers> nice dad
[22:27] <autarch> i ssaid I didn't know anything about this movie
[22:28] <impdentist> do you know anything about shelley johnson
[22:28] <ohitsmax_> now for a solo viewing of they bite also
[22:28] <ratbags> if his mom and him are fucking on the downlow why's he flirting with popcorn girls
[22:28] <besoin> it's ferris's dad
[22:28] <ratbags> no loyalty in love anymore
[22:28] <autarch> uh. yeah/
[22:28] <kaykewalkers> nice dad
[22:28] <ratbags> okay if she bangs her dad
[22:28] <ratbags> im out
[22:28] <ohitsmax_> hahaha
[22:28] <autarch> looks like it's night. time to walk
[22:28] <ohitsmax_> gotta say i do want a mr pibb now
[22:28] <kaykewalkers> mmmm mmm mmm mmh mmhmhhh
[22:29] <autarch> moaning bros
[22:29] <lhs> whatcha say
[22:29] <besoin> this movie introduced me to this song
[22:29] <Trebbers> What the hell
[22:29] <autarch> hissy fit.
[22:29] <ratbags> "if you'll excuse us, officer, we have some screwing to do"
[22:29] <autarch> that's a don don
[22:29] <impdentist> reagan
[22:29] <kaykewalkers> lol
[22:29] <Trebbers> Looks like this 'officer' wants to dance with mom too
[22:29] <ratbags> she called the police on a cat?
[22:29] <kaykewalkers> taxation is theft, goodnight officer
[22:30] <ratbags> how did the cops not just tell her to fuck off
[22:30] <donnamartin> wow
[22:30] <kaykewalkers> "mike and ikes"
[22:30] <impdentist> we should call any manifestation of conservative populism in a 80s+ movie a "ron ron"
[22:30] <Ampurrsand> and yikes
[22:30] <donnamartin> wow early slut shaming
[22:30] <donnamartin> from a mother fucker
[22:30] <autarch> yeah seriously, where does he get off
[22:30] <ratbags> with his mom is where
[22:31] <impdentist> not gonna answer that
[22:31] <impdentist> ah
[22:31] <lhs> does she have dirty pillows or sweater nubbins?
[22:31] <autarch> this movie is gross
[22:31] <ratbags> what are sweater nubbins
[22:31] <kaykewalkers> they're breasts momma
[22:31] <autarch> "Hi famished I'm sleepwalker"
[22:31] <lhs> king's word for boobs in IT
[22:31] <bob511> Mike Pence watching this, wondering why everyone's uncomfortable about this loving marriage.
[22:31] <ratbags> wow
[22:31] <ratbags> i've never read IT
[22:31] <lhs> me neither, nor shall i
[22:31] <donnamartin> lol bob
[22:31] <ohitsmax_> ahah
[22:32] <besoin> otho
[22:32] <autarch> Mr Phallus?
[22:32] <Trebbers> "Yes, but I asked you about the life cycle of bats"
[22:32] <kaykewalkers> lol
[22:32] <ratbags> yo if a teacher hit me with a ruler i'd be rolling in money right now
[22:32] <lhs> another talented young man
[22:32] <impdentist> legal in texas
[22:32] <donnamartin> thanks, genius
[22:33] <Ampurrsand> like pathetic sad?
[22:33] <ratbags> wait its still legal in texas to hit students?
[22:33] <kaykewalkers> lol
[22:33] <impdentist> yeah with parental permission
[22:33] <ratbags> holy smokes
[22:33] <donnamartin> what?
[22:33] <dan2_> and a movie has to have a beginning, a middle, and an Enya
[22:33] <kaykewalkers> buuurrrn
[22:33] <autarch> NOT A FOUR-SIDED BOX, YOU ASS
[22:33] <ohitsmax_> weird cut
[22:33] <donnamartin> pauly shore?
[22:33] <besoin> it certainly helps, dan
[22:33] <impdentist> he's still steaming over that
[22:33] <lhs> haha dan
[22:33] <kaykewalkers> he's still sulking over that burn
[22:34] <autarch> teacher's gonna bring a gun to school now
[22:34] <impdentist> why would a bell be that long
[22:34] <dan2_> movie really enjoys painfully loud sounds
[22:34] <ohitsmax_> Teen Agers
[22:34] <lhs> i dunno, his mind sounds dangerous
[22:35] <ratbags> oh my god she's gonna fuck her dad
[22:35] <Ampurrsand> jeeez
[22:35] <autarch> what was the girl on the left doing?
[22:35] <kaykewalkers> oh autarch
[22:35] <ohitsmax_> "you pour a mean pibb"
[22:35] <donnamartin> so what kind of virgins they need here? like, does everything butt count?
[22:35] <autarch> not as hard as you nailed your mom
[22:35] <lhs> a box really does have six sides, you nailed it
[22:35] <Ampurrsand> lol
[22:36] <ratbags> i don't think butt sex is allowed for virins
[22:36] <ratbags> virgins
[22:36] <impdentist> was the assignment just "write a novella-length horror story and read it aloud to the class so we can discuss its literary merits"
[22:36] <donnamartin> i know a bunch of evangelical kids who think otherwise
[22:36] <ratbags> yeah well little do they know that they'll be safe from walkers
[22:36] <autarch> He's gonna fuck her mom too.
[22:37] <kaykewalkers> fuck carpeted stairs
[22:37] <ratbags> hanging gravestone rubbings in your home?
[22:37] <kaykewalkers> cool mom
[22:37] <ratbags> only in california
[22:37] <lhs> those came from target
[22:37] <donnamartin> i bet mother son girlfriend is a subset of mother son on pornhub
[22:37] <autarch> cool rubbings
[22:37] <Trebbers> This is the room of a 80 year old
[22:37] <impdentist> she's a slob
[22:37] <bob511> She undresses like the tazmanian devil.
[22:37] <dan2_> imagine walking up to your father's gravestone to mourn and there's some lady just rubbing it with a big pencil
[22:37] <impdentist> just throwing underwear around with wild abandon
[22:37] <ratbags> "so do you always leave your panties lying around?"
[22:37] <kaykewalkers> wait is she the mom in riverdale?
[22:37] <Ampurrsand> "i love garbage"
[22:38] <Ampurrsand> yes kayke
[22:38] <impdentist> yes
[22:38] <lhs> with the viewfinder, idiot
[22:38] <ratbags> "mothers LOVE me"
[22:38] <bob511> Heh
[22:39] <Ampurrsand> "what's it called again.... Blowjob Point?"
[22:39] <ohitsmax_> i do rubbings with my mom
[22:39] <Ampurrsand> every mom wants to rub this boy
[22:39] <ratbags> "you know what else i find a little hard"
[22:39] <besoin> boy, bluffing his way through gravestone rubbing
[22:39] <kaykewalkers> hard enough ;)
[22:39] <besoin> classic
[22:39] <autarch> "I fucked him to death"
[22:39] <Trebbers> hhaha
[22:40] <dan2_> he's gonna rub himself raw
[22:40] <ratbags> "i will show what else i learned from my mom sometime"
[22:40] <kaykewalkers> lollll
[22:40] <Trebbers> Exaggered with that number 5 stick business bit
[22:40] <donnamartin> yeah, this tongue technique is an old family secret
[22:40] <autarch> HERE WE GOOOOO!
[22:40] <Ampurrsand> IT"S A MONSTER
[22:40] <donnamartin> just like mom used to make
[22:40] <dan2_> which Enya album was this on?
[22:40] <kaykewalkers> omg sonic the hedgehog vibe
[22:41] <Trebbers> A VW Bug has never tailgated a Trans Am
[22:41] <autarch> oh look, it's herbie from the herbie movies
[22:41] <ratbags> laserblast jus tso you know
[22:41] <lhs> his license plate had better say 1NC35T
[22:41] <besoin> he let himself be pulled over by his teacher
[22:41] <dan2_> lol lhs
[22:41] <ratbags> its the end of the 1st quarter and the kings have only scored 10 points
[22:41] <ohitsmax_> lol treb
[22:41] <autarch> haha lhs
[22:41] <ratbags> utah has scored 39
[22:41] <Ampurrsand> love to run my students off the road
[22:41] <ratbags> i had a teacher like this
[22:41] <dan2_> all this is because of the box remark
[22:41] <ratbags> mr. pidgeon
[22:41] <impdentist> he found out you were a sleepwalker?
[22:41] <autarch> this teacher is my favorite kind of nerd
[22:41] <laserkitty> we should do a fundraiser for the kings rb.
[22:42] <Ampurrsand> i mean he basically said he was a sleepwalker in class that's pretty honest
[22:42] <autarch> the kind who obsesses over rules for the sake of owning his enemies
[22:42] <Trebbers> About to own that Beatle
[22:42] <ohitsmax_> WHAT
[22:42] <kaykewalkers> lollll
[22:42] <dan2_> "Mr Phallus why are you being so hard on me?"
[22:42] <ratbags> lmao
[22:42] <autarch> yowch
[22:42] <donnamartin> omg
[22:42] <ohitsmax_> dafbhasdfasd
[22:42] <autarch> that's gonna leave a mark
[22:42] <kaykewalkers> yaaassss
[22:42] <Trebbers> Blood on the bug was a nice touch
[22:42] <autarch> why didn'the get in his car
[22:42] <bob511> "Probable inspiration for Buffy the Vampire Slayer vampires"
[22:43] <Trebbers> Sitck shift?
[22:43] <Ampurrsand> can't drive with one hand!
[22:43] <autarch> he had a car that he could have used to run away faster
[22:43] <donnamartin> xylophone death theme
[22:43] <kaykewalkers> he aint got no haaand
[22:43] <impdentist> standard transmission, can't drive with one hand
[22:43] <impdentist> fuck
[22:43] <besoin> definitely_not_california, indiana
[22:43] <ratbags> thats ableist, ampersand
[22:43] <autarch> is he eating his ass?
[22:43] <donnamartin> god damn that camera work
[22:43] <ohitsmax_> just gonna rub my face on ya
[22:43] <ohitsmax_> like a cat
[22:43] <ratbags> are cats like attracted to them?
[22:43] <bob511> Yeah.
[22:43] <Ampurrsand> can't drive with one hand *if bleeding to death
[22:44] <laserkitty> this is not at all obvious in this film but cats are the only people who can tell what they are rb
[22:44] <bob511> I think it was in one of the title-sequence drawings.
[22:44] <autarch> cmon boiiii
[22:44] <lhs> clovis the cat
[22:44] <Ampurrsand> koosh, baby, koosh
[22:44] <ratbags> this guy is my favorite character
[22:44] <autarch> clovis is good
[22:44] <dan2_> life-affirming scene
[22:44] <Trebbers> Is there a reason that his mom only looks slightly older than him
[22:44] <Trebbers> or just movie bullshit
[22:44] <autarch> nice shades
[22:44] <donnamartin> those sunglasses
[22:44] <ratbags> theyre immortal, trebbers
[22:44] <dan2_> I'm pro cops now thanks to this guy
[22:44] <autarch> i think sleepwalkers are eternal maybe, trebbers
[22:44] <ohitsmax_> let's not be rash, dan
[22:44] <autarch> like vamps
[22:44] <kaykewalkers> acab except for this one
[22:45] <ratbags> if all cops did was play with cats and give speeding tickets to reckless drivers
[22:45] <Ampurrsand> i think also cats can have children when they're fairly young
[22:45] <ratbags> i would love cops
[22:45] <impdentist> their walkie talkie etiquette is terrible
[22:45] <laserkitty> all cops are boffo
[22:45] <autarch> yeah this character is great. if it turns out he's into incest too, i'm gonna be real let down
[22:45] <besoin> this music
[22:45] <ohitsmax_> can this morph into a buddy cop film with this guy and clovis
[22:45] <Trebbers> "Breaking the Law (against incest)"
[22:45] <ratbags> yeah how is there no spin off called SIMPSON AND CLOVIS
[22:45] <bob511> Wonder where that squirrel comes down in the cat-sleepwalker divide.
[22:45] <Trebbers> ahjahh
[22:45] <impdentist> MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE
[22:45] <Trebbers> Holy fuck cat reaction shot
[22:45] <ratbags> THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE, CLOVIS
[22:46] <besoin> this trans am sucks
[22:46] <autarch> i hate this motherfucker
[22:46] <impdentist> oh no
[22:46] <dan2_> Michael Bay's Toonces
[22:46] <bob511> Would watch
[22:46] <besoin> i too couldn't help but think of toonces
[22:46] <kaykewalkers> that tuuurn
[22:46] <autarch> thank god for crossing guards
[22:46] <donnamartin> technically the cop started it
[22:46] <besoin> clovis looked at the camera
[22:46] <bob511> "Clovis, don't look at the camera."
[22:46] <besoin> right into my soul
[22:46] <Trebbers> *cat points to shotgun, helpfully
[22:47] <ratbags> ALRIGHT CLOVIS
[22:47] <ratbags> GET HIM
[22:47] <impdentist> YES
[22:47] <dan2_> GET HIM CLOVIS
[22:47] <ohitsmax_> AHAHA
[22:47] <impdentist> ASHIFUKNDF
[22:47] <kaykewalkers> literal mother fucker
[22:47] <dan2_> AHHH
[22:47] <ratbags> WHAT THE UCK
[22:47] <donnamartin> gif please
[22:47] <ratbags> LAURIE, I DO NOT HAVE TIME TO EXPLAINE
[22:47] <laserkitty> clovis is gonna wreck shit before this movie is over
[22:47] <autarch> love andy's reaction
[22:47] <lhs> i saw dinosaurs for a second
[22:47] <Ampurrsand> https://78.media.tumblr.com/268121db3f78e5d48c08c108b4de2e33/tumblr_oo970lB8On1qav174o2_500.gif
[22:47] <impdentist> he forgot about the face thing pretty quick
[22:47] <donnamartin> omg amp
[22:47] <bob511> I saw Rick Scott in there.
[22:48] <impdentist> yeah for sure bob
[22:48] <kaykewalkers> omg why does he turn into a baby before a cat monster?
[22:48] <impdentist> ahaha what
[22:48] <Trebbers> Why didn't he do that before
[22:48] <dan2_> The Predator, but it's a car
[22:48] <lhs> now it's a ghost car?
[22:48] <ratbags> baby was his original form
[22:48] <dan2_> that's a $600 million dollar movie right there
[22:48] <donnamartin> invisibility cloak
[22:48] <impdentist> hahahaha
[22:48] <ratbags> CLOVIS VISION
[22:49] <lhs> what native american legend is king appropriating to explain this shit
[22:49] <donnamartin> cat acting should get an socar
[22:49] <ratbags> HE CAN'T HEAR HIM?
[22:49] <ratbags> HOW DO YOU CLOAK SOUND
[22:49] <autarch> cute cat
[22:49] <ratbags> STEPHEN KING OF THE YAYO
[22:49] <kaykewalkers> this is me and my cat when I'm trying to eat a grilled cheese without him stealing it
[22:49] <ohitsmax_> hahaha
[22:49] <donnamartin> haha kayke
[22:49] <besoin> good old indiana
[22:49] <dan2_> I think his collar says "Clovis: The Attack Cat"
[22:49] <ohitsmax_> i want a 4th cat so i can name him clovis
[22:49] <lhs> it does
[22:49] <dan2_> sick
[22:49] <impdentist> whoa
[22:49] <autarch> love the idea of replacing police dogs with police cats
[22:50] <laserkitty> sleepwalkers are OP this is bullshit
[22:50] <impdentist> score by oneothrix point never
[22:50] <autarch> wait, so sleepwalkers have invisibility for themselves AND their cars?
[22:50] <bob511> He seemed to have plenty of faces.
[22:50] <kaykewalkers> anything their butt touches
[22:51] <lhs> like melting wax
[22:51] <besoin> horace you backlit bastard
[22:51] <Ampurrsand> kitty litter in your eye
[22:51] <ratbags> wow its windy out
[22:51] <ratbags> pretty spooky
[22:51] <autarch> clovis rules
[22:51] <Trebbers> "Get a sketch artist in here"
[22:51] <Ampurrsand> WHO CANNOT LOVE CLOVIS??
[22:51] <donnamartin> i love clovis
[22:51] <kaykewalkers> awww is clovis incoming or outgoing mail
[22:51] <bob511> "Can you believe it?  A cat not liking a stranger?"
[22:52] <ratbags> thats a clue
[22:52] <ratbags> i love this guy
[22:52] <kaykewalkers> outgoing
[22:52] <autarch> oh geez. more incest.
[22:52] <ratbags> A COP...ON HIS OWN...OUTSIDE OF THE LAW...HE ONLY TRUSTS ONE PERSON...A CAT
[22:52] <donnamartin> more like oh YEAH
[22:52] <Trebbers> Mom is ready
[22:52] <kaykewalkers> it's a real meatloaf music video in here
[22:52] <autarch> does there have to be like 7 incest scenes?
[22:52] <besoin> heh, kayke
[22:53] <donnamartin> so this is mommy dearest if there were cats
[22:53] <Trebbers> Imagine taking a date to this and not knowing about this incest shit
[22:53] <besoin> this lady has a lot night clothes
[22:53] <besoin> *lot of
[22:53] <ratbags> lol trebbers
[22:53] <Trebbers> Does she even go outside
[22:53] <ratbags> "so are you into this or...?"
[22:53] <dan2_> "Don't worry son, I have some Fancy Feast"
[22:54] <lhs> hairball
[22:54] <ohitsmax_> something will happen
[22:54] <kaykewalkers> nothin's gonna 'arm you, not while I'm around
[22:54] <donnamartin> this town has a feral problem
[22:55] <ratbags> the cats just wanna fuck him too
[22:55] <donnamartin> i want the cats to murder them when they're fuckgin
[22:55] <besoin> santo & johnny & mom & cats & madchen
[22:55] <autarch> there's that song again. cannot FOR THE LIFE OF ME remember what it's called.
[22:55] <ohitsmax_> alright cmon
[22:55] <ratbags> goodness me
[22:55] <autarch> do they really have to show it?
[22:55] <donnamartin> how does she have the energy to fuck
[22:55] <Ampurrsand> Oedipus Fluffy
[22:55] <ratbags> oh god
[22:55] <Trebbers> Taffy fucking
[22:56] <dan2_> lol
[22:56] <Ampurrsand> Oedipuss
[22:56] <Ampurrsand> goddamit
[22:56] <kaykewalkers> lol
[22:56] <kaykewalkers> hated it amp
[22:56] <ohitsmax_> if only this was a novel first, they could have cut that out
[22:56] <laserkitty> what ... what time is it
[22:56] <kaykewalkers> that one orange looks fucked
[22:56] <ratbags> "we;re not as bad as the incest mom"
[22:57] <dan2_> "He rubs down gravestones and hangs them in his home, what more could you ask for"
[22:57] <impdentist> she hangry
[22:57] <besoin> another nightie
[22:57] <ohitsmax_> if you never leave the house all you need is nighties
[22:58] <kaykewalkers> it's a dead mouse
[22:58] <bob511> Haha
[22:58] <lhs> tasteful display of cat toys
[22:58] <dan2_> ayEE
[22:58] <ratbags> they dont have clothes int he reflection
[22:58] <Trebbers> Wait, maybe don't have mirrors
[22:59] <besoin> they take really good care of the house
[22:59] <autarch> seems like they could just kill her now
[22:59] <Ampurrsand> yes calling someone incomplete is very sweet
[23:00] <besoin> wait, tanya's mom is also ferris's mother
[23:00] <besoin> how odd
[23:00] <kaykewalkers> nice to... EAT you
[23:00] <autarch> lol kayke
[23:00] <ohitsmax_> holy shit it is
[23:00] <ohitsmax_> damn
[23:00] <lhs> and cat mommy was the creepy madam in deadwood
[23:01] <bob511> Borg queen, too.
[23:01] <donnamartin> ewww
[23:01] <autarch> what did she mean by that?
[23:01] <lhs> starts rubbing face against tombstones
[23:01] <Ampurrsand> lol
[23:01] <besoin> but it's weird because tanya's mom AND dad were in ferris bueller
[23:01] == impdentist [48b633b8@gateway/web/freenode/ip.72.182.51.184] has quit [Ping timeout: 256 seconds]
[23:01] <ratbags> i'm a rubber
[23:02] <ratbags> i'm a lover
[23:02] <ratbags> i'm a mother fucker
[23:02] <autarch> rubber? i hardly know her
[23:02] <kaykewalkers> loll
[23:02] <besoin> why did the car turn back
[23:02] <ohitsmax_> clovis mvp
[23:02] <donnamartin> woah
[23:02] <autarch> lol ratbags
[23:02] <donnamartin> did anyone write that down
[23:02] <Ampurrsand> one ball man, pecker in hand
[23:02] <autarch> and he's off to the rodeo.
[23:02] <autarch> the time is 49:30
[23:02] <besoin> easy, film is expensive
[23:03] <autarch> we'll have to come back to that
[23:03] <lhs> senior portrait time
[23:03] <Trebbers> uh
[23:03] <donnamartin> the spinning camera work has to stop
[23:03] <ratbags> is this a malick film
[23:03] <Ampurrsand> "oh! your whiskers are tickling me"
[23:03] <Trebbers> If the incest doesn't make you puke the camera work will
[23:03] <autarch> this guy looks way too old to be in high school
[23:04] == impdentist [48b633b8@gateway/web/freenode/ip.72.182.51.184] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[23:04] <kaykewalkers> this is a solid goth date
[23:04] <Ampurrsand> "Charles, I'm in charge now"
[23:04] <besoin> i went to a cemetery with a goth girl from okcupid once
[23:04] <besoin> recommend it
[23:04] <donnamartin> she seems too slutty for this sacrifice
[23:04] <kaykewalkers> lets go to the graveyard and discuss my short stories
[23:04] <autarch> gross sounds
[23:05] <donnamartin> ewwww, shut up bart o'kavanaugh
[23:05] <dan2_> he must think he's going to the rodeo
[23:05] <autarch> wtf?
[23:05] <Ampurrsand> wow cats really do steal your breath
[23:05] <impdentist> welp
[23:05] <ratbags> whoa
[23:05] <autarch> she's part cat?
[23:05] <donnamartin> wow hard as nails
[23:05] <autarch> wait, teen wolf?
[23:06] <Ampurrsand> "Tonya, do you like my Ron Perlman cosplay?"
[23:06] <kaykewalkers> she brought so many tupperware
[23:06] <impdentist> lot going on here
[23:06] <Trebbers> Layers
[23:06] <dan2_> he's vaping his date
[23:06] <autarch> this makeup is great
[23:06] <besoin> oh come on
[23:06] <donnamartin> OMG
[23:06] <donnamartin> RUN
[23:06] <Trebbers> Oh, that's all you have to do
[23:06] <autarch> get out you dumb idiot
[23:06] <kaykewalkers> tonya hunny just GO
[23:06] <kaykewalkers> wHAT are you DOING
[23:06] <dan2_> if you're gonna kill someone, this is the place to do it
[23:06] <autarch> lol
[23:07] <kaykewalkers> 'peekababy'???
[23:07] <bob511> Indiana?
[23:07] <donnamartin> oh FUCK
[23:07] <autarch> haahaa
[23:07] <autarch> holy shit
[23:07] <donnamartin> when did this become a comedy?
[23:07] <kaykewalkers> that was such a good line delivery
[23:07] <autarch> this guy is so good
[23:07] <ratbags> hes making this up
[23:07] <impdentist> what songs does this guy listen to
[23:07] <Ampurrsand> *untranslatable*
[23:07] <besoin> this guy's freestyles
[23:07] <laserkitty> best actor in a shit flixe
[23:07] <kaykewalkers> is his radio broken?
[23:08] <Ampurrsand> "here, take my cat"
[23:08] <lhs> it's the rodeo song by david allen coe
[23:08] <besoin> yeah, lock her in the backseat like a criminal
[23:08] <ratbags> NO
[23:08] <donnamartin> oh man i liked andy
[23:08] <impdentist> ah man
[23:08] <besoin> clovis, please
[23:08] <ohitsmax_> cop kebab ;)
[23:08] <Trebbers> No more one liners
[23:08] <autarch> fuck that stank
[23:08] <Ampurrsand> clovis is napping
[23:08] <impdentist> oh wow
[23:08] <laserkitty> rip harry from Heat
[23:08] <autarch> COME ON CLOVIS
[23:08] <donnamartin> or andy is a sleep walker?
[23:09] <kaykewalkers> he's okay
[23:09] <laserkitty> AH FUCK ANDY
[23:09] <dan2_> I just hope the pencil to the brain doesn't change his personality
[23:09] <besoin> come on, shoot him again
[23:09] <ratbags> noooooo
[23:09] <autarch> Fuck that was bad
[23:09] <kaykewalkers> clovis, you're up!
[23:09] <Trebbers> C L O V I S
[23:09] <donnamartin> kjflaskdjf;laksdfja
[23:09] <autarch> hell yeah
[23:09] <laserkitty> DO NOT FUCK WITH CLOVIS
[23:09] <autarch> HELL YEAH
[23:09] <besoin> i smell oscar
[23:09] <dan2_> Clovis: The Revenge Cat
[23:09] <donnamartin> GIF
[23:09] <autarch> CLOVIS
[23:09] <donnamartin> omg i'm dying
[23:09] <Ampurrsand> Tonya's Best Friend
[23:10] <kaykewalkers> i luv clovis
[23:10] <Trebbers> Give clovis puppet a star on the walk of fame
[23:10] <autarch> CLOVIS RULES
[23:10] <kaykewalkers> please gum
[23:10] <autarch> is clovis okay?
[23:10] <besoin> :'(
[23:10] <Trebbers> oh man
[23:10] <autarch> police gum
[23:10] <ratbags> well i gotta say charles isn't very good at being a sleepwalker
[23:10] <ohitsmax_> no......
[23:10] <bob511> Clovis gonna get that soul.
[23:10] <kaykewalkers> clovis avenge daddy
[23:10] <Ampurrsand> lol
[23:10] <autarch> Clovis. Loyal to the end.
[23:10] <ratbags> ew
[23:10] <Ampurrsand> wow hot
[23:10] <donnamartin> eww i feel sexually harrassed
[23:11] <dan2_> thought they turned Andy into sushi for Clovis
[23:11] <ohitsmax_> i want my yard to look like this
[23:11] <kaykewalkers> is she slicing up breast implants? I could not identify that food
[23:11] <bob511> Yeah, I wouldn't mind a sleepwalker for a neighbor.
[23:11] <bob511> Just hang out on the lawn with the kitties.
[23:11] <Trebbers> "Clovis got me mommy"
[23:11] <Ampurrsand> conceited much?
[23:11] <kaykewalkers> he looks like my beloved grinch
[23:11] <autarch> if they bang now...
[23:12] <autarch> good call kayke
[23:12] <donnamartin> save your strength for fucking me
[23:12] <besoin> is that the eczema honey i keep getting ads for on instagram
[23:13] <dan2_> aww, he could only dim some
[23:13] <besoin> he's on the fritz
[23:13] <kaykewalkers> lol dan
[23:13] <bob511> ...
[23:13] <autarch> oh wow besoin
[23:13] <ratbags> king's on coke here
[23:13] <ohitsmax_> steve!
[23:13] <autarch> it steve
[23:13] <donnamartin> oh all the coke possible
[23:13] <besoin> that was tobe hooper too
[23:14] <laserkitty> christ almighty this guy is on coke
[23:14] <Ampurrsand> Stephen has Resting Sleepwalker Face
[23:14] <autarch> who are you calling a weirdo/pervert? you just wrote like 8 incest scenes
[23:14] <Trebbers> ahah amp
[23:14] <kaykewalkers> hot toothpick in the mouth action
[23:14] <ohitsmax_> lmao amp
[23:15] <besoin> that younger guy king spoke to was clive barker
[23:15] <kaykewalkers> ratatouille
[23:16] <dan2_> "And give him a medal"
[23:16] <ratbags> horace is weird
[23:16] <kaykewalkers> horace needs to learn
[23:17] <autarch> horace seems like a dunce
[23:17] <lhs> nice corn water?
[23:17] <impdentist> that did NOT make me feel better mother
[23:17] <kaykewalkers> lol
[23:17] <besoin> what even happened to him
[23:17] <lhs> cats sleep like 20 hours a day, calm down
[23:17] <besoin> he seemed fine with the corkscrew in the eye
[23:17] <kaykewalkers> clovis
[23:17] <impdentist> he got clovis'd
[23:17] <Trebbers> "I've put on my dancing shoes for the last time, mother"
[23:17] <donnamartin> this is very Rent meets Les Mis meets Cats
[23:18] <Ampurrsand> they're coming to take me away ME-OW!
[23:18] <autarch> being able to turn cars invisible seems like a weird power for a supposedly ancient creature
[23:18] <dan2_> so can they smell you when you go invisible? seems like you would smell all this blood
[23:19] <kaykewalkers> maybe the love seat just smells like blood
[23:19] <Trebbers> fucked up that door
[23:19] <bob511> Speaking of...
[23:19] <besoin> more resting sleepwalker face
[23:19] <dan2_> she has a blood scented Glade plug-in
[23:19] <ratbags> thatll break your ankle
[23:19] <kaykewalkers> "lotta cats" could have been the tagline
[23:20] <ratbags> perlman giving it his all
[23:20] <Trebbers> "Smells like blood, ointment, and fucking in here'
[23:20] <besoin> "gotta say, this home is charming"
[23:20] <Ampurrsand> god it's so insane they put Perlman in a movie with monsters that look exactly like him
[23:20] <ohitsmax_> lol
[23:20] <autarch> haha
[23:20] <kaykewalkers> I always forget ron isn't big
[23:21] <bob511> Sleeper sleepwalker
[23:21] <impdentist> yoiks
[23:21] <autarch> what the fuck
[23:21] <Trebbers> woah
[23:21] <Ampurrsand> big face, big rep
[23:21] <autarch> JESUS
[23:21] <Trebbers> oh sad
[23:21] <ohitsmax_> dark
[23:21] <besoin> poor horace
[23:21] <lhs> leave the butt smacking to the teachers
[23:21] <kaykewalkers> he looks like he should be will ferrel sized
[23:21] <autarch> the dark horace
[23:21] <ratbags> horace says the most fucked up things
[23:21] <Ampurrsand> look at all that fruit
[23:21] <besoin> that's a lot of fruit
[23:21] <dan2_> overdoing it
[23:21] <Trebbers> oh wow
[23:21] <kaykewalkers> "want some corn water? it'll make you feel better"
[23:22] <Ampurrsand> our filthy girl
[23:22] <dan2_> you pull the wrong thing and it's all gonna tumble down
[23:22] <donnamartin> dope bathroom
[23:22] <donnamartin> this is my dream
[23:22] <dan2_> you're playing fruit jenga everytime you go for a snack
[23:22] <autarch> gonna be a popout
[23:23] <kaykewalkers> she gave all the corn to fucking horace
[23:23] <laserkitty> whoa the techs who talked to stephen king were clive barker and tobe hooper
[23:23] <laserkitty> what a fuckin nerdy movie
[23:23] <ratbags> another tagline could've been
[23:23] <ratbags> HORNY AND CORNY
[23:23] <kaykewalkers> lol
[23:23] <donnamartin> CPI security
[23:23] <laserkitty> lol
[23:23] <donnamartin> identify yourself
[23:23] <Ampurrsand> Even the Wind is Horny
[23:23] <impdentist> was she wearing shoes for the first time in this movie
[23:24] <besoin> three stooged em
[23:24] <ratbags> classic head butting together
[23:24] <ohitsmax_> boink!
[23:24] <autarch> lol
[23:24] <dan2_> Larry, Curly, and MURDER
[23:24] <ratbags> horace got this
[23:24] <bob511> Weird that Garris couldn't actually get Barker for MoH.
[23:24] <autarch> yeah, bout time you got off your ass
[23:24] <Trebbers> At least he got a final meal
[23:24] <impdentist> "police car"
[23:24] <kaykewalkers> does he think these are HIS parents now?
[23:24] <donnamartin> oh fuck
[23:25] <ratbags> WOW
[23:25] <besoin> terrible day in the neighborhood
[23:25] <autarch> come on
[23:25] <autarch> where's clovis
[23:25] <ratbags> horace gets shoved and HE'S DOWN
[23:25] <donnamartin> oh shit
[23:25] <kaykewalkers> horace's weakness - being pushed
[23:25] <ratbags> JESYS
[23:25] <impdentist> pffffffffff
[23:25] <besoin> ma!
[23:25] <laserkitty> I HOPE YOU DIE. I HOPE YOU BOTH DIE.
[23:25] <donnamartin> wow uh
[23:25] <ohitsmax_> XXXXL t shirt
[23:26] <donnamartin> deputy dope here
[23:26] <ratbags> horace gotta work on his shot
[23:26] <autarch> horace is an awful shot
[23:26] <impdentist> great shooting horace
[23:26] <autarch> jesus
[23:26] <Ampurrsand> Officer Mark Mann
[23:26] <kaykewalkers> horace's other weakness - aiming
[23:26] <Trebbers> "extra bullets are in the car
[23:26] <ratbags> she really goes for the scratch
[23:26] <bob511> Probably should've assigned Bastet instead of Horus to guard her.
[23:26] <besoin> and here's landis
[23:26] <ratbags> is that gene simmons
[23:26] <kaykewalkers> "he has butthole eyes"
[23:26] <besoin> come on
[23:26] <ohitsmax_> AHAHAHAH
[23:26] <Trebbers> Cornholed
[23:26] <ratbags> STABBED WITH CORN
[23:26] <Ampurrsand> Murder John, Marry Joe, Fuck Clovis?
[23:26] <donnamartin> i just died
[23:26] <ratbags> LOL
[23:26] <ohitsmax_> YES!!!
[23:26] <autarch> GET CLOVIS OVER HERE
[23:26] <dan2_> holy shit
[23:27] <ohitsmax_> my wife just got up and left the room
[23:27] <laserkitty> incredible
[23:27] <donnamartin> ew who has ketch up on their corn
[23:27] <besoin> imdb goofs: there was no corn left
[23:27] <ratbags> he did say it was the best meal he'd ever had
[23:27] <lhs> well feed him dessert then
[23:27] <autarch> horace you dick, answer the phone
[23:27] <kaykewalkers> true besoin
[23:27] <autarch> kitties!
[23:27] <dan2_> The Clovis army assembles
[23:27] <ratbags> that corn was from horace's plate, besoin
[23:27] <ohitsmax_> the night prowling theme
[23:27] <Ampurrsand> cue "The Boys Are Back In Town"
[23:27] <ratbags> half eaten cob
[23:27] <kaykewalkers> clovis and the clovettes
[23:27] <ratbags> the deadliest of all cobs
[23:27] <donnamartin> Dumbledor's Army
[23:27] <donnamartin> lol amp
[23:28] <besoin> pretty sure this is warner brothers
[23:28] <autarch> wasn't clovis the first king of the franks?
[23:28] <ratbags> WOW
[23:28] <ohitsmax_> thats a mouth
[23:28] <autarch> jesus
[23:28] <impdentist> whoop
[23:28] <ratbags> CASTLE ROCK???
[23:28] <besoin> castle rock, indiana
[23:28] <Ampurrsand> Castle Rock Season 2?
[23:28] <kaykewalkers> why ya hittin yourself
[23:28] <autarch> GET. CLOVIS.
[23:28] <ratbags> YOU SELF REFERENTIAL BASTARD
[23:29] <besoin> that's the fright night house back there
[23:29] <Trebbers> ahahha what
[23:29] <ratbags> WHAT
[23:29] <ohitsmax_> what the FUCK kind of gun is that
[23:29] <ratbags> state police guns are way over powered
[23:29] <donnamartin> Motherfuckin' Strength right there
[23:29] <autarch> who was that?
[23:29] <ratbags> is that will smith's gun from MIB
[23:29] <lhs> turned on the GTA cheats, i see
[23:29] <Ampurrsand> Stephen King should consider being only a screenwriter from now on
[23:30] <dan2_> he must have written this over a lunch break
[23:30] <autarch> need the cats to come through for me
[23:30] <kaykewalkers> tag yourself I'm one of the roof cats
[23:30] <dan2_> Catsle Rock
[23:30] <autarch> come on kitties
[23:30] <besoin> boooo
[23:30] <ratbags> oh no
[23:31] <Ampurrsand> sexy boy
[23:31] <autarch> "Am i pretty?"
[23:31] <kaykewalkers> her socks look so comfy
[23:31] == bob511 [62cb20d1@gateway/web/freenode/ip.98.203.32.209] has quit [Ping timeout: 256 seconds]
[23:31] <besoin> "ah god, he looks like jeff sessions"
[23:31] <Ampurrsand> looool
[23:31] <kaykewalkers> lol
[23:31] <donnamartin> aha
[23:31] <autarch> punch her in the face
[23:31] <lhs> i bet he'd love to not be allergic to shrimp
[23:31] <dan2_> RIP California Raisin
[23:31] <besoin> a little on the nose, ma
[23:31] <Ampurrsand> telekinetic invisible cat people
[23:32] <autarch> that song again
[23:32] <kaykewalkers> ya gotta
[23:32] <impdentist> BAH GAWD THAT'S SLEEPWALKERS MUSIC
[23:32] <Ampurrsand> lol
[23:32] <Trebbers> ahah
[23:32] <ohitsmax_> getting their moneys worth
[23:32] <autarch> scratch her face
[23:32] <Trebbers> "Dance with quotes, or without?"
[23:33] <dan2_> his real favorite was WHOAA I'M A MONSTER but he didn't want to ruin it for mom
[23:33] <autarch> shouldn't the cats be in there?
[23:33] <impdentist> he's a terrible dancer
[23:33] <dan2_> *cats begin pouring down chimney*
[23:33] <ohitsmax_> this is fairly disturbing
[23:33] <autarch> come on
[23:33] <ratbags> CLOVIS
[23:33] == bob511 [ac3a0b64@gateway/web/freenode/ip.172.58.11.100] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[23:33] <autarch> CLOVIS!!!
[23:33] <donnamartin> cat hunter theme
[23:33] <besoin> haha
[23:33] <kaykewalkers> the cats need clovis to lead them
[23:33] <ohitsmax_> #CLOVIS
[23:33] <ratbags> clovis is huge
[23:33] <Trebbers> Clovis drove himself?
[23:33] <autarch> aw hell yeah pimp
[23:34] <dan2_> Zero Dark Clovis
[23:34] <impdentist> ok scream louder now
[23:34] <Ampurrsand> now clovis now
[23:34] <besoin> is his name really charles
[23:34] <besoin> she hasn't dropped that artifice
[23:34] <Trebbers> yessss
[23:34] <donnamartin> yesss
[23:34] <donnamartin> clovis is really the star here
[23:34] <besoin> seriously
[23:34] <ohitsmax_> ssssssssmokin
[23:34] <Ampurrsand> light em up, Clovis
[23:34] <dan2_> IT'S CLO TIME
[23:35] <lhs> get out of his eye hole
[23:35] <bob511> Police department is going to be 75% cat after this.
[23:35] <impdentist> really wanted william tell overture here
[23:35] <ratbags> *ted nugent begins playing*
[23:35] <donnamartin> :(
[23:35] <Trebbers> Just fucking shoot it
[23:35] <ohitsmax_> all cats are beautiful
[23:35] <besoin> they look like hamsters
[23:35] <kaykewalkers> no guns only cats, idiot
[23:35] <dan2_> yeah
[23:35] <dan2_> and why are they so greasy
[23:36] <kaykewalkers> are hamsters greasy?
[23:36] <autarch> lucky throw
[23:36] <Trebbers> Thought he was gonna fall on a picket fence
[23:36] <impdentist> where are the cats
[23:36] <autarch> why aren't the cats killing him
[23:36] <Trebbers> wah
[23:36] <autarch> nice throw
[23:36] <Ampurrsand> well, autarch, can't tell a cat what to do
[23:36] <Trebbers> there we go
[23:36] <autarch> just go
[23:36] <dan2_> there's an uncooked turkey quality to her skin
[23:36] <ohitsmax_> YEAH GO GO GO
[23:37] <autarch> there we go
[23:37] <bob511> Copy cats.
[23:37] <besoin> cat voltron assemble
[23:37] <kaykewalkers> clovis is worth 20 other cats
[23:37] <Ampurrsand> lol bob
[23:37] <dan2_> maybe that's why the cats are so primed to go eat her
[23:37] <donnamartin> oh my god
[23:37] <autarch> oh hell yeah
[23:37] <impdentist> i am not really understanding the physiology of these things
[23:37] <dan2_> red hot momma
[23:37] <impdentist> they can shift shapes and turn invisible but are just fire on the inside
[23:37] <ohitsmax_> they look so proud
[23:37] <Trebbers> very telling that they never show a full shot of the suit unless it's on fire
[23:38] <kaykewalkers> so was it just called sleepwalkers because of that song then, stephen?
[23:38] <laserkitty> CHARRRRRRRRRRRLES THEY TOOK MY BOY
[23:38] <bob511> Probably for the best that he was her only son, considering, you know...
[23:38] <Ampurrsand> it me
[23:38] <dan2_> what were the neighbors doing for all of that?
[23:38] <autarch> clovis
[23:38] <donnamartin> yea! clovis
[23:38] <laserkitty> well, folks, in the end, just call the sleepwalkers jugdish. because they absolutely cannot slay any pussy
[23:38] <donnamartin> where is anyone in this town
[23:38] <autarch> clovis rules
[23:38] <Ampurrsand> MM HMM HMM
[23:38] <besoin>  play us out, enya
[23:38] <ohitsmax_> tanya and clovis will return
[23:38] <ratbags> her mom is still alive isnt she
[23:38] <Trebbers> What clovis' eyes have seen
[23:38] <donnamartin> they're gonna find her with a feral cat colony
[23:38] <impdentist> really want the end theme to be an arrangement of sleepwalk that's just cat noises
[23:39] <kaykewalkers> clovis is so good
[23:39] <donnamartin> just lord of the lies
[23:39] <impdentist> wait is she the only human left alive
[23:39] <besoin> that would be amazing, dentist
[23:39] <Ampurrsand> this is such a good movie
[23:39] <autarch> how is it even possible for a cat to be so good
[23:39] <bob511> Oh, missed Dante.
[23:39] <ratbags> weird movie
[23:39] <dan2_> just her and a town of 5,000 cats
[23:39] <laserkitty> MULDER: now do u believe SCULLY: shut up fox
[23:39] <kaykewalkers> her sassy friends survived
[23:39] <Trebbers> Wonderfully short too
[23:39] <lhs> most cats are that good
[23:39] <besoin> sparks the cat
[23:39] <dan2_> Who would win, Clovis vs. The Mouse from Mouse Hunt
[23:39] <Ampurrsand> kayke can we name our next cat Clovis?
[23:39] <autarch> Sparks
[23:39] <dan2_> first one to kill the other wins
[23:39] <kaykewalkers> sure
[23:40] <kaykewalkers> middle name cigarettes
[23:40] <ohitsmax_> if there's not a board cat named clovis so help me
[23:40] <bob511> Cindy James, Cat Lady
[23:40] <Ampurrsand> SHRUNKEN HEADS on Sunday! sleep walk, everybody!
[23:40] == ratbags [ae5930a2@gateway/web/freenode/ip.174.89.48.162] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[23:40] <laserkitty> this is the best crash test dummies cover i've ever heard
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Postby oh! it's max! » Thu Oct 11, 2018 11:58 pm

had to be done (i'm fuckin losing it)

seriously.
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Postby kayke » Fri Oct 12, 2018 12:02 am

:ryan:
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Postby Ampersand » Fri Oct 12, 2018 12:03 am

oh! it's max! wrote:had to be done (i'm fuckin losing it)



:o :D

:awful:
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Postby Ampersand » Sat Oct 13, 2018 11:36 am

This Sunday,
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 14, 2018 10:34 am

Bump. Tonight! Get shrunk!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 14, 2018 2:22 pm

Ampersand wrote:This Sunday,
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 14, 2018 4:24 pm

Bump
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 14, 2018 8:16 pm

two hours until shrinkage commences!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 14, 2018 9:53 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Shrunken Heads
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Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 14, 2018 10:04 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Shrunken Heads
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https://webchat.freenode.net/
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 14, 2018 11:43 pm

Code: Select all
[22:11] <Ampersand> 3
[22:11] <Ampersand> 2
[22:11] <Ampersand> 1
[22:11] == rixx_ [43f474a7@gateway/web/freenode/ip.67.244.116.167] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:11] <Ampersand> rixx we just started
[22:11] <rixx_> ok
[22:11] <autarch> ricky you're just in time
[22:11] <besoin> damn it, i was in another tab
[22:11] <besoin> time?
[22:11] <Ampersand> 0:25
[22:11] <rixx_> what is time
[22:11] <rixx_> ok
[22:11] <autarch> 29
[22:11] <Ampersand> 35
[22:11] <pretty_yeoman> even the bassoon is not politically correct
[22:12] <autarch> 0:50
[22:12] <bob511> Bodhi Elfman, too, huh?
[22:12] <besoin> can someone call out 0:60
[22:12] <Ampersand> 1:00
[22:12] <autarch> :60
[22:12] <pretty_yeoman> 60
[22:12] <kayke> this is just nightmare before christmas music then?
[22:12] <Trebbers> Cross between Hooked on a Feeling and Ommpa Loompa song
[22:12] <autarch> so stoked for van helsing
[22:12] <besoin> can someone give me 1:30
[22:12] <Ampersand> missed it
[22:12] <besoin> er, too slow
[22:12] <lhs> pee wee's minor adventure
[22:12] <pretty_yeoman> just passed it besoin
[22:12] <bob511> Original Movie Title Idea by Charles Band
[22:12] <autarch> we're passed buddy
[22:12] <pretty_yeoman> will give you 2
[22:12] <besoin> give me 2:00
[22:12] <besoin> thanks
[22:12] <Ampersand> 1:45
[22:13] <pretty_yeoman> 2 in :10
[22:13] <rixx_> music by Richard Band, Original Movie Idea by Charles Band
[22:13] <rixx_> Band bros
[22:13] <kayke> damn all the elfmen
[22:13] <Ampersand> 2:00
[22:13] <pretty_yeoman> 2:00
[22:13] <autarch> 2:00
[22:13] <besoin> okay, i'm good now
[22:13] <besoin> thanks
[22:13] <pretty_yeoman> a whole keebler tree full of score composers
[22:13] <Trebbers> Market AND Produce
[22:13] <autarch> this kid has a low voice
[22:13] <autarch> oh wait that was the old guy
[22:13] <Ampersand> scammin grandmam
[22:14] <besoin> ratrick penna
[22:14] <Trebbers> DCs?
[22:14] <kayke> that is a STRIDE
[22:14] <pretty_yeoman> wouldn't want to leave a bit of the floor dry
[22:14] <Ampersand> "i've been keeping it in my mouth"
[22:14] <autarch> bullies
[22:14] <pretty_yeoman> time traveling bullies
[22:14] <besoin> oh yeah, this is the tough neighborhood studio backlot
[22:14] <Trebbers> this kid needs some nasal spray
[22:14] <autarch> booger
[22:14] <besoin> it's a me, mario
[22:14] <rixx_> is that a wipers tee
[22:15] <pretty_yeoman> antifa plumber fuckyeah
[22:15] <lhs> i thought that stain was a police badge
[22:15] <autarch> wiper, no wiping
[22:15] <shalrunkabi> "I'm wrenchin ova here"
[22:15] <kayke> sally you deserve better
[22:15] <Trebbers> chekovs inhaler
[22:15] <autarch> sidekick
[22:15] <Ampersand> da vipers, dey come to vipe de vindows
[22:15] <autarch> jfc
[22:15] <bob511> "Don't I recognize you as a combination of two kids from IT?"
[22:15] <besoin> is this ersatz "it"
[22:15] <autarch> imagine being introduced as a sidekick
[22:15] <kayke> lol bob
[22:15] <autarch> by a fucking 12 year old
[22:15] <pretty_yeoman> said no kid ever
[22:16] <lhs> weirder stuff
[22:16] <pretty_yeoman> lol lhs
[22:16] <besoin> raccoon scat
[22:16] <pretty_yeoman> an encyclopedia wrote this script
[22:16] <Trebbers> 'It's coffee that's been digested by a rodent'
[22:16] <shalrunkabi> opium beans
[22:16] <autarch> what city are they in?
[22:16] <dan2_> starchy potato jellybeans, mmm mmm can't wait
[22:16] <besoin> warnerbrothersville
[22:16] <lhs> town city
[22:16] <Ampersand> a police magician
[22:17] <Trebbers> Studio Lot, CA
[22:17] <pretty_yeoman> a police magician
[22:17] <pretty_yeoman> hi amp <3
[22:17] <Ampersand> ;)
[22:17] <autarch> jeez bill, you ass
[22:17] <autarch> sally, pls step in
[22:17] <dan2_> getting bullied just because they don't have homes, that's low
[22:17] <besoin> is there logo supposed to look like windshield wipers on a windshield
[22:17] <besoin> *their
[22:18] <Trebbers> rude
[22:18] <autarch> shrink their heads, sumatra
[22:18] <bob511> She just follows this gang around and makes disapproving comments about their bullying?
[22:18] <kayke> "you boys and sally get outta here"
[22:18] <pretty_yeoman> do it, use your police magic
[22:18] <pretty_yeoman> heh
[22:18] <autarch> hoping for the line "let's shrink some heads"
[22:18] <besoin> she looks like urban nancy kerrigan
[22:18] <kayke> leave them to sit in their pile of old pallets in peace
[22:19] == shrunkheadtist [48b633b8@gateway/web/freenode/ip.72.182.51.184] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:19] <besoin> and then dropped them out of a helicopter
[22:19] <autarch> we at 8:05
[22:19] <dan2_> mouth actors?
[22:19] <Ampersand> 8:20
[22:19] <shrunkheadtist> we already start? my computer decided to update without my persmission
[22:19] <Trebbers> Set looks like it's set in the 30s
[22:19] <dan2_> 8:30
[22:19] <Ampersand> 8:35
[22:19] <pretty_yeoman> the 1950-30-80s
[22:19] <besoin> they had to borrow lois & clark's set, treb
[22:19] <kayke> love a good evil laugh fade
[22:19] <shrunkheadtist> can i get 9:12
[22:19] <autarch> the good news is that no heads have shrunk yet
[22:19] <Trebbers> ahh
[22:20] <kayke> this is a good look
[22:20] <pretty_yeoman> 10 sec until 9:12
[22:20] <besoin> jesus
[22:20] <Ampersand> 9:12
[22:20] <pretty_yeoman> 9:12
[22:20] <autarch> tommy is a fucking judgemental ass
[22:20] <shrunkheadtist> i'm worried about how much i missed given that it's like 10% of the movie
[22:20] <besoin> it's basically it so far, dentist
[22:21] <besoin> bullies vs. nerds
[22:21] <kayke> they talked about green lantern being cool for a while
[22:21] <Ampersand> Green Lantern rips, Vipers drip, Mr. Sumatra is a Haitian police magician
[22:21] <Ampersand> all ye need to know
[22:21] <kayke> the newspaper man is a magician/cop
[22:21] <shrunkheadtist> this guy!
[22:21] <autarch> EY, dey was walkin heah
[22:21] <autarch> oh hell yeah
[22:21] <Trebbers> Fuck em up
[22:21] <shrunkheadtist> don't miss!
[22:21] <shalrunkabi> rip
[22:21] <autarch> LET'S SHRINK SOME HEADS
[22:21] <Ampersand> powdered NOS
[22:21] <shrunkheadtist> no brake powder
[22:21] <shrunkheadtist> ancient recipe
[22:22] <dan2_> gettin dusted
[22:22] <Trebbers> That is Haitian policework
[22:22] <pretty_yeoman> kinda looked like when you set powdered coffee creamer on fire
[22:22] <besoin> since kindergarten, when they were in 9th grade
[22:22] <autarch> so...2 years?
[22:22] <shrunkheadtist> great club hand gesture
[22:22] <pretty_yeoman> headtist the only other update was kid in the white shirt is new to the neighborhood
[22:22] <autarch> see that's why they get made fun of. that hand shit
[22:22] <pretty_yeoman> but he pretty much covered it
[22:23] <bob511> An exiled Papa Doc taking on the cases the authorities can't and won't is quite the pitch.
[22:23] <besoin> johnathan offbrandis
[22:23] <shrunkheadtist> doesn't he know superman is good
[22:23] <bob511> Ha
[22:23] <pretty_yeoman> lol besoin
[22:23] <Ampersand> lol besoin
[22:23] <dan2_> lol
[22:23] <autarch> tommy <3 toxic masculinity
[22:23] <kayke> where's his green lantern poster if he likes green lantern so much
[22:23] <pretty_yeoman> on the ceiling above his bed
[22:24] <autarch> tommy make ur fuckin move, my man
[22:24] <dan2_> having a hard time figuring out ages here
[22:24] <Trebbers> Movin fast
[22:24] <besoin> and he wears oversized mint polo shirts
[22:24] <kayke> "he really likes green lantern and he slouches all the time"
[22:25] <autarch> lol besoin
[22:25] <dan2_> the bullies she was dating were like 25-30
[22:25] <lhs> "give that message to your dad for me"
[22:25] <besoin> heh
[22:25] <besoin> the sexualization of this girl is a problem
[22:25] <Trebbers> Larry Clark's Shrunken Heads
[22:25] <kayke> yeah they have yet to give her a whole shirt
[22:25] <bob511> I think that was just Kids, Trebek.
[22:25] <pretty_yeoman> old lady Wilson shouldn't have parked on Car-tear Ave.
[22:26] <Ampersand> this actress was 16-17 when this was filmed. can't find the age of Vinnie's actor because this was his only role
[22:26] <autarch> yeah, she's like 15 and they won't let her wear a full shirt
[22:26] <lhs> when parents fight, clothes are tight
[22:26] <Ampersand> i'm assuming 35
[22:26] <besoin> that's the camera they filmed this movie with
[22:26] <shrunkheadtist> there it is, conclusive evidence
[22:26] <besoin> they should be dancing
[22:26] <autarch> tommy u gotta do something jfc
[22:27] <kayke> tommy is a filmer, not a doer
[22:27] <autarch> srsly.
[22:27] <Trebbers> Tommy doesn't want to compromise his journalistic ethics by interfering
[22:27] <pretty_yeoman> *snap* *snap* *snap*
[22:27] <autarch> vipers are the new sharks
[22:27] <dan2_> When you're a...viper
[22:27] <autarch> acab
[22:27] <kayke> ahas (all heads are shrunken)
[22:27] <besoin> whoa, snitch in private
[22:28] <autarch> tommy is a narc
[22:28] <pretty_yeoman> yeah hold yr horses larson
[22:28] <autarch> lol kayke
[22:28] <shalrunkabi> Tommy learns a valuable lesson
[22:28] <Ampersand> Booger is the Elfman that's married to Jenna
[22:28] <autarch> tommy
[22:28] <kayke> he could give her 40% of his shirt
[22:28] <autarch> tommy can you hear me
[22:29] <pretty_yeoman> heh kayke
[22:29] <besoin> and still have 125% of a shirt left over
[22:29] <Trebbers> Paperwork factory
[22:29] <shrunkheadtist> no legitimate business can be done in an office with a pool table
[22:29] <lhs> tommy read the outsiders and wanted to be a soc
[22:29] <autarch> ok really like sleeveless green shirt guy
[22:29] <autarch> holy shit
[22:29] <besoin> this guy is in the mafia and he spends time bullying 15 year olds
[22:29] <pretty_yeoman> lol big mo
[22:29] <shalrunkabi> is that Tommy?
[22:30] <Ampersand> Meg Foster, in the role of a lifetime
[22:30] <autarch> yeah that's tomtom
[22:30] <besoin> this reminds me of debra winger in made in heaven
[22:30] <shrunkheadtist> "i'm setting bail at $500 each"
[22:30] <kayke> big mo intrigues me
[22:30] <pretty_yeoman> Bruno Mars IS
[22:30] <kayke> lol yeoman
[22:30] <bob511> Oh, it was a gay joke.
[22:31] <dan2_> I guess all the guys in blank t-shirts haven't earned their fangs yet
[22:31] <autarch> holy shit that was a good one
[22:31] <besoin> vinny looks totally different now
[22:31] <shalrunkabi> lol
[22:31] <autarch> jeez
[22:31] <Trebbers> wait, what's the rating on this
[22:31] <dan2_> have these guys ever considered hanging out indoors
[22:31] <shrunkheadtist> yeah i was under the impression that this was a childrens movie
[22:31] <autarch> shrink their heads, mo
[22:31] <kayke> welcome to the set of who framed roger rabbit
[22:32] <pretty_yeoman> it's ok to teach children that it's a dire world out there
[22:32] <autarch> bill's big T Shirt is driving me wild
[22:32] <shalrunkabi> it's an R rating
[22:32] <bob511> I think Band had a separate family label from FME.
[22:32] <autarch> R for Really small heads?
[22:32] <bob511> For stuff like Prehysteria etc.
[22:32] <kayke> lol
[22:32] <pretty_yeoman> omg big mo is best new character
[22:33] <kayke> I want you should
[22:33] <besoin> that cut
[22:33] <autarch> is big mo leo dicaprio?
[22:33] <autarch> looks like a young dicaprio
[22:33] <pretty_yeoman> it's New Chicagadelphia
[22:33] <pretty_yeoman> accent-wise
[22:34] <autarch> North American City Slicker Vernacular
[22:34] <kayke> tommy, please stop. they want to kill you.
[22:34] <bob511> Sounds exactly like what a mafia would do.
[22:34] <kayke> your little friend is dying
[22:34] <bob511> "We lost the book, everyone's a winner!"
[22:34] <besoin> a cartoon stack of chairs
[22:34] <shrunkheadtist> yeah is he seriously trying his best to fuck with a mob boss
[22:35] <autarch> i need to see some titular shrunken heads
[22:35] <kayke> tommy just hates crime soooo much
[22:35] <besoin> the movie is a flower, autarch
[22:35] <besoin> let it open
[22:35] <dan2_> the twist is that the mob is gonna be the ones to shrink them
[22:35] <autarch> they gonna ea him up
[22:35] <pretty_yeoman> it is not that hard to write a script
[22:35] <autarch> big mo freakin
[22:35] <pretty_yeoman> big mo chewin up the scenery
[22:35] <kayke> this new big mo look is killer
[22:36] <autarch> big mo could be cate blanchett
[22:36] <shrunkheadtist> big mo is the only one who is aware of what movie he's in but doesn't give a shit
[22:36] <besoin> whoever said meg foster nailed it
[22:36] <kayke> i want to be big mo
[22:36] <kayke> one gun for each child
[22:36] <besoin> time to shoot some underclassmen
[22:37] <shrunkheadtist> oh wait big mo is actually a woman?
[22:37] <shalrunkabi> I feel like there should be a cop c-plot
[22:37] <bob511> The actress is.
[22:37] <kayke> big mo is a lesbian icon
[22:37] <autarch> holy shit
[22:37] <bob511> Whether the character is supposed to be....?
[22:37] <autarch> this movie is fucking wild
[22:37] <besoin> haha
[22:37] <shalrunkabi> well damn
[22:38] <besoin> gif
[22:38] <autarch> hahahahha
[22:38] <lhs> they just referred to her as her, so yeah
[22:38] <autarch> holy shit
[22:38] <Trebbers> On some robocop shit
[22:38] <Ampersand> wheeeeeezo
[22:38] <dan2_> guess they really...slipped up
[22:38] <kayke> oh no, the movie shot us
[22:38] <autarch> they just fucking blew them to pieces
[22:38] <bob511> Yeah, I assumed the first time it was just homophobic humor.
[22:38] <besoin> you showed them, tommy
[22:38] <bob511> But now I dunno.
[22:38] <autarch> did not see tommy dying in the first 30 minutes
[22:39] <shrunkheadtist> the tone of this movie is so weird
[22:39] <autarch> who wrote these accents in 1994
[22:39] <besoin> and his head stayed a normal size the whole time
[22:39] <pretty_yeoman> is that the secretary from Twin Peaks
[22:39] <autarch> yeah looks like lucy
[22:39] <besoin> but it's not
[22:39] <shrunkheadtist> i thought that but yeah
[22:39] <shrunkheadtist> i literally watched twin peaks today and nah
[22:39] <kayke> "hey" snap "come play pool with my girlfriend"
[22:40] <besoin> oh, it literally is meg foster?????
[22:40] <autarch> big mo also could be like a 14 year old dana ashcroft
[22:40] <bob511> It is.
[22:40] <autarch> oh wait holy shit it is
[22:41] <autarch> sumatra's gotta avenge them
[22:41] <kayke> "tommy, bill, and the other one"
[22:41] <bob511> "That new kid"
[22:41] <besoin> poor freddy
[22:41] <Trebbers> wait, one service
[22:41] <pretty_yeoman> aw geez, movie
[22:41] <autarch> the other one, who i cared so much about
[22:41] <besoin> knew these guys five seconds and has to share a funeral with them
[22:41] <dan2_> love this
[22:41] <kayke> bff funeral
[22:41] <lhs> it said "and meg foster as big moe" in the opening credits
[22:41] <autarch> buddies to the end
[22:41] <bob511> "Please accept my condolences, Mr. and Mrs. Newkid."
[22:41] <Trebbers> ahhahah
[22:41] <besoin> stephen king didn't even have the balls to kill all the kids in the first act
[22:41] <shalrunkabi> lol bob
[22:41] <autarch> lol bob
[22:42] <dan2_> sounds like the music to that Dinosours sitcom
[22:42] <Trebbers> Ripping of Satie
[22:42] <shalrunkabi> so this guy is the real villain?
[22:42] <pretty_yeoman> Mr. Sumatra opens trenchoat, is made of bugs
[22:42] <bob511> A jaunty decapitation tune.
[22:42] <shrunkheadtist> the mortician did a great job on those kids
[22:43] <autarch> this is music that would play in the Goron City in a zelda game
[22:43] <kayke> lol
[22:43] <kayke> true
[22:43] <shrunkheadtist> three heads in a duffel bag
[22:43] <besoin> this sounds like elfman composed it with a gun to his head
[22:43] <pretty_yeoman> lol besoin
[22:43] <autarch> ahaha
[22:43] <Trebbers> i think there are other things to do
[22:43] <kayke> very low security funeral home
[22:43] <dan2_> does he just leave the cauldron going all day when he's not home?
[22:43] <autarch> lookin slick, vin
[22:43] <besoin> maybe we can put this guy away for another crime
[22:44] <autarch> sorry i killed em
[22:44] <kayke> she's in mourning so she's not wearing a crop top
[22:44] <pretty_yeoman> hey she's makin' good shirt progress
[22:44] <besoin> looks like a hang ten shirt
[22:44] <autarch> good line
[22:44] <autarch> oh fuck
[22:44] <autarch> sumatra
[22:45] <besoin> frank sumatra
[22:45] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:45] <kayke> the doctor of cats
[22:45] <lhs> or maggots
[22:45] <Trebbers> The Doctor of Cats
[22:45] <besoin> haha
[22:45] <bob511> Dr. Katz
[22:45] <pretty_yeoman> didn't know Katz was a vet!
[22:45] <autarch> holy fuck those heads
[22:46] <dan2_> lol bob
[22:46] <kayke> this score is such a cop out
[22:46] <bob511> yeoman's was better.
[22:46] <autarch> wtf sumatra
[22:46] <dan2_> rip Clovis
[22:46] <besoin> very sensitive to haitian culture
[22:46] <autarch> don't bring clovis into this
[22:46] <kayke> I'm going to tell Danny Elfman off about this if I ever see him
[22:46] <Ampersand> he's peacocking with this outfit
[22:47] <Trebbers> Wonder how he got that cauldron in there
[22:47] <autarch> holy shit nice clothes
[22:47] <Trebbers> Like a crane
[22:47] <autarch> this is classic Opening Credits music
[22:47] <lhs> this is just the beetlejuice score backwards
[22:47] <bob511> Always awkward when he confuses his sacrificial molcajete for his guac one.
[22:47] <rixx_> this movie would have scared the fuck out of me as a kid
[22:47] <autarch> they come back to life, but with tiny heads?
[22:48] <kayke> it's kind of fucked up he involved the new kid- you don't know if he's into this
[22:48] <autarch> halle selassie?
[22:48] <autarch> he's a rastafarian?
[22:48] <shrunkheadtist> oh he's a rasta and also a voodoo priest
[22:48] <kayke> aren't we all?
[22:48] <shalrunkabi> this is pretty fucked up
[22:48] <autarch> "please put us back"
[22:49] <autarch> holy shit the look on their faces
[22:49] <kayke> omg
[22:49] <pretty_yeoman> Rene Auberjonois IS - Tommy Topknot, shrunken head
[22:49] <Ampersand> eat da wizzo now
[22:49] <autarch> holy shit i'm dying
[22:49] <Trebbers> EAT THE WIZZO
[22:49] <Ampersand> the blood wizzo
[22:49] <dan2_> I wonder if this situation is covered by a living will
[22:49] <autarch> omg
[22:49] <shrunkheadtist> he's thinking about thos Beans
[22:49] <kayke> hahahahaa
[22:49] <autarch> too late, freddie
[22:50] <Ampersand> such love
[22:50] <autarch> hahaha
[22:50] <kayke> so no afterlife then, huh boys?
[22:50] <autarch> thanks a lot
[22:50] <shrunkheadtist> this does seem bad
[22:50] <shalrunkabi> I guess his sarcasm hasn't shrunken
[22:50] <Ampersand> actor's internal dialogue
[22:50] <autarch> bill
[22:50] <autarch> lol amp
[22:50] <Trebbers> ahah, actually good line
[22:51] <bob511> ::laughing flute::
[22:51] <autarch> the kids are so much better as shrunken heads. this rules
[22:51] <besoin> they were cast for their performances as shrunken heads
[22:51] <lhs> let the dumbo loa ride you
[22:51] <autarch> nice 3D moment there
[22:51] <besoin> that's why they were so awkward as regular people
[22:51] <dan2_> all this seems to indicate that Mr. Sumatra has done this before
[22:51] <pretty_yeoman> "forward impulse thrusters 1/3 power"
[22:52] <kayke> whaaat
[22:52] <dan2_> jesus
[22:52] <shalrunkabi> woah
[22:52] <besoin> where's the fucking montage music
[22:52] <shrunkheadtist> this is.....
[22:52] <shalrunkabi> is this canon?
[22:52] <shrunkheadtist> whoa
[22:52] <autarch> is this a "training to be badasses" montage?
[22:52] <besoin> one YEAR?
[22:52] <shrunkheadtist> a year???
[22:52] <autarch> it was a montage monologue
[22:52] <Trebbers> Revenge is a dish best served shrunken
[22:52] <besoin> please don't murder my son again
[22:52] <Ampersand> "sure ya don't mean SNEEZE?"
[22:52] <pretty_yeoman> shouldn't he be like always doing bicep curls?
[22:53] <pretty_yeoman> lol this rips
[22:53] <shrunkheadtist> wtf happened to these kids
[22:53] <autarch> here's my one question: how the HELL is tommy going to get the girl?
[22:54] <kayke> lol
[22:54] <dan2_> "just not any of the ones about seeing your families"
[22:54] <pretty_yeoman> man how many movies have those city building models been in
[22:54] <autarch> get em, boys!
[22:54] <shrunkheadtist> he just chose these kids to become his crime-fighting shrunken head team
[22:55] <pretty_yeoman> Freddy's in-flight facial expressions are excellent
[22:55] <dan2_> no way
[22:55] <bob511> Just a retextured Star Wars arcade game.
[22:55] <kayke> his power is... knife?
[22:55] <lhs> the boys' heads are back in town
[22:55] <shrunkheadtist> like if these guys are going around righting wrongs why aren't there hundreds of them
[22:55] <autarch> ya this rules
[22:55] <pretty_yeoman> maybe not "righting" wrongs
[22:55] <Ampersand> Stinky Man, NOOOOO!
[22:55] <autarch> whoever directed this loves midriff
[22:55] <shrunkheadtist> stinky man?
[22:55] <autarch> haha
[22:55] <Trebbers> yesssss
[22:55] <dan2_> RIP Steven Wright
[22:55] <shrunkheadtist> oh lord
[22:55] <shrunkheadtist> why is the black kid the one with the switchknife
[22:55] <kayke> so... was this for kids?
[22:56] <Ampersand> clearly yes
[22:56] <pretty_yeoman> dear GOD
[22:56] <shrunkheadtist> yeah im at a total loss for who the audience for this is
[22:56] <shalrunkabi> why are they robots
[22:56] <dan2_> this should have been the next Power Rangers
[22:56] <autarch> we're the audience
[22:56] <shrunkheadtist> oh gross
[22:56] <kayke> yeah this isn't creepy or weird
[22:56] <besoin> just like in explorers
[22:56] <shrunkheadtist> she has a picture of him wtf
[22:56] <autarch> dan2 was that actually steven wright?
[22:56] <rixx_> the picture lolol
[22:57] <besoin> autarch is shook
[22:57] <dan2_> nah
[22:57] <besoin> doesn't know what's real anymore
[22:57] <rixx_> this music is pretty
[22:57] <autarch> lol besoin
[22:57] <kayke> photo is now actual size
[22:57] <dan2_> Go Sally, From Vinnie
[22:57] <Ampersand> lol kayke
[22:57] <pretty_yeoman> omg Kayke
[22:57] <autarch> kayke omg
[22:57] <shalrunkabi> she knew him like a week
[22:58] <dan2_> this is how every incel happens
[22:58] <Trebbers> holy hsit
[22:58] <autarch> jfc tommy is jaded
[22:58] <besoin> a zombie movie now?
[22:58] <kayke> oh no is he farting?
[22:59] <autarch> yeah was not prepared for zombies
[22:59] <Ampersand> it's been awhile since we've had farting zombies
[22:59] <autarch> oh, wait, they're recycling zombies.
[22:59] <Ampersand> keep your shitty clean
[22:59] <shalrunkabi> local criminals
[22:59] <pretty_yeoman> Ampersand life is beautiful and that sentence is proof
[22:59] <besoin> put more makeup on this child
[22:59] <autarch> Local Criminals is a great band name
[22:59] <pretty_yeoman> oh great they're Broken Windows zombies
[22:59] <besoin> giuliani voters
[23:00] <autarch> my cousin vinnie
[23:00] <autarch> pls say my cousin vinnie
[23:00] <pretty_yeoman> Mitzi - bazoombas and morals
[23:00] <besoin> i hope the jenna elfman household sits down to watch this every halloween
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[23:01] <besoin> i do love the use of "malefactors" in this movie
[23:02] <Trebbers>     goddam
[23:02] <kayke> just like goosebumps dog
[23:03] <autarch> boog's a pal
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[23:03] <kayke> booger and pudd, the odd couple
[23:03] <dan2_> Robot Jox?
[23:03] <bob511> That was FME too, right?
[23:04] <besoin> we should watch robot jox
[23:04] <besoin> or maybe it's been done
[23:04] <shrunkheadtist> so this is where it turns into a slasher flick huh
[23:04] <autarch> jfc
[23:04] <Trebbers> fuck!
[23:04] <pretty_yeoman> sick movie choice
[23:04] <shalrunkabi> at least they didn't bite his dick off
[23:04] <Trebbers> That was just mean
[23:04] <bob511> Oh, I guess is was Empire, before it went bust.
[23:04] <dan2_> do the beard next plz
[23:04] <kayke> I cannot believe one of them has electricity, one has fangs, and one has a knife
[23:04] <autarch> oh god
[23:04] <besoin> urgh
[23:04] <Trebbers> oood
[23:04] <bob511> Uh
[23:04] <autarch> oh my god
[23:04] <autarch> oh my fucking god
[23:04] <shrunkheadtist> oy
[23:05] <autarch> this is not good
[23:05] <kayke> yikes
[23:05] <autarch> this is really not good
[23:05] <shalrunkabi> uhhhhh yikers
[23:05] <pretty_yeoman> we've been trying to work through this whole toxic masculinity patriarchy thing for a long ass time
[23:05] <lhs> and yet could have been worse
[23:05] <autarch> yeah, true
[23:05] <autarch> at least she's cast as the goodo ne
[23:05] <besoin> what a good friend
[23:05] <lhs> 2.5 hours, perfectly reasoanle
[23:05] <lhs> able*
[23:06] <kayke> turn off your pal's cold bath for him
[23:06] <besoin> you'll catch a cold, booger!
[23:06] <kayke> booger's the crow now
[23:06] <autarch> pretty good acting by boog actually
[23:06] <pretty_yeoman> zombie boog & pud better have some good comedy moments
[23:06] <shrunkheadtist> so the heads have the power to turn crooks into zombies by killing them
[23:06] <autarch> doomed one is a fucking sick thing to call someone
[23:06] <pretty_yeoman> 'what do you want, doomed one' is fire
[23:06] <besoin> doomed malefactor
[23:06] <bob511> We're all looking for boogers and pud, Vin.
[23:06] <autarch> yeah, i'm putting
[23:07] <autarch> i'm putting doomed one in my repertoire
[23:07] <lhs> sounds like they're about to fertilize the garden
[23:07] <autarch> nice fart sounds
[23:07] <shrunkheadtist> pud sounds a little like kyle mooney in those interview videos
[23:08] <rixx_> he got dressed
[23:08] <autarch> oh, tommy
[23:08] <kayke> "I can't believe my grown man, criminal boyfriend would say that to me"
[23:08] <pretty_yeoman> she's dressed like a cross-stitched kitchen platitude
[23:08] <Ampersand> lol
[23:08] <autarch> lol yeoman
[23:09] <lhs> trips on a headstone, bottom half of cardigan tears off
[23:09] <besoin> just here talking to his headless corpse
[23:09] <Ampersand> "i also think Green Lantern is the best"
[23:09] <pretty_yeoman> lol lhs
[23:09] <autarch> oh god
[23:09] <autarch> oh my god
[23:09] <pretty_yeoman> "Tommy I didn't mean it"
[23:09] <autarch> TOMMY
[23:09] <shrunkheadtist> yeah ok
[23:09] <shalrunkabi> Tommy, you creep
[23:09] <kayke> book it, sal
[23:09] <dan2_> coming on too strong Tommy
[23:09] <besoin> why are there no regular stones at this cemetery
[23:09] <Trebbers> uh
[23:09] <lhs> "i heard that every girl wants a little head"
[23:09] <pretty_yeoman> oh no lhs might be right
[23:09] <Ampersand> this is not consensual
[23:09] <shrunkheadtist> oh ok yeah just do that
[23:09] <shalrunkabi> Jesus Tommy, chill out
[23:09] <pretty_yeoman> LHS,
[23:09] <kayke> bear witness!
[23:09] <autarch> Bear Witness t
[23:09] <dan2_> this is incredible
[23:09] <autarch> tommy is fucking intense
[23:10] <bob511> Oh, are we going to get a bouncing-head song sequence?
[23:10] <autarch> this rules
[23:10] <besoin> dying over here
[23:10] <kayke> Tommy
[23:10] <shalrunkabi> tender
[23:10] <besoin> the picture-in-picture
[23:10] <autarch> young and tender age
[23:10] <pretty_yeoman> yeah that PIP is slaying me
[23:10] <autarch> oh fuck
[23:10] <shrunkheadtist> uh
[23:10] <pretty_yeoman> i'm a dyin
[23:10] <autarch> oh god
[23:10] <besoin> oh no
[23:10] <shalrunkabi> NOOOOOOO
[23:10] <autarch> jfc
[23:10] <Trebbers> the fuckj
[23:10] <shrunkheadtist> oh no
[23:10] <bob511> Goddamn
[23:10] <besoin> oh come on
[23:10] <autarch> tommy you ass
[23:10] <dan2_> no Tommy no
[23:10] <kayke> I'm yelling
[23:10] <pretty_yeoman> what in the blue fuck
[23:10] <shalrunkabi> this is too much
[23:10] <autarch> i hate tommy
[23:11] <autarch> what the fuck was that
[23:11] <besoin> did danny elfman use his influence to keep his brother out of prison
[23:11] <kayke> I'm starting a go fund me to get Sally out of this movie
[23:11] <Ampersand> how much does it cost to keep a cauldron on perpetual bubble
[23:11] <pretty_yeoman> $100 bux i'm in
[23:11] <besoin> his magazine stand must do really well
[23:11] <pretty_yeoman> even Sumatra's not sure, he built the condo around the cauldron
[23:12] <bob511> Mr. Sumatra's all about the sous vide.
[23:12] <autarch> lol bob
[23:12] <shalrunkabi> mansplaining shrunken heads
[23:12] <dan2_> My 3 Shruns
[23:12] <kayke> lol
[23:12] <shrunkheadtist> ha
[23:12] <besoin> heh
[23:12] <autarch> they live in the cabinet? omg
[23:12] <Ampersand> and voodoo
[23:12] <kayke> "but tommy motor boated me!"
[23:12] <lhs> heh
[23:12] <shalrunkabi> pls b respectful
[23:13] <Trebbers> here we go
[23:13] <autarch> yeah, i'm gonna be thiking about that motorboating all week
[23:13] <shalrunkabi> wait
[23:13] <kayke> WHAT
[23:13] <shalrunkabi> hold up no
[23:13] <Trebbers> no no
[23:13] <kayke> SALLY
[23:13] <pretty_yeoman> NO
[23:13] <autarch> what the fuck
[23:13] <kayke> SALLY
[23:13] <shrunkheadtist> aw man
[23:13] <autarch> this is fucking awful
[23:13] <lhs> everybody needs a bosom for a pillow
[23:13] <besoin> what on earth
[23:13] <autarch> oh my god, what a line
[23:13] <Trebbers> what a quote
[23:13] <autarch> this is so weird
[23:13] <shalrunkabi> this is obscene
[23:13] <kayke> WHAT
[23:13] <dan2_> ok whoa whoa
[23:13] <Trebbers> what why
[23:13] <autarch> how is this for children?
[23:14] <Ampersand> Cinema
[23:14] <kayke> I WANT TO GO TO JAIL
[23:14] <autarch> no
[23:14] <autarch> that's the wrong music for this.
[23:14] <bob511> ...
[23:14] <shrunkheadtist> please don't
[23:14] <dan2_> His heart shrunk 3 sizes that day
[23:14] <besoin> does idakoos sell a "put danny elfman's brother in prison" tshirt
[23:14] <Trebbers> Mr. Sumatra getting weirded out now
[23:14] <autarch> lol dan2
[23:14] <pretty_yeoman> because almost every mainstream screenwriter until like 2017 had serious fucking patriarchy problems
[23:14] <Trebbers> hah besoin
[23:15] <dan2_> at this point is seems like Big Mo is the one I'd least like to see in prison
[23:15] <kayke> lol dan
[23:15] <pretty_yeoman> yeah big mo has carved out an ok niche amidst all of this nightmare
[23:15] <autarch> oh god these farts
[23:15] <lhs> powered by wizzo bean bars
[23:15] <pretty_yeoman> they're somehow like not even good fart noises
[23:16] <autarch> these farts are amazing
[23:16] <kayke> I'm sad ratbags is missing a movie with fart jokes
[23:16] <autarch> yeah ratbags would love this
[23:16] <dan2_> zombies doing a pretty terrible job at picking up the litter
[23:16] <dan2_> look at this
[23:17] <besoin> what was the importance of that year long break really
[23:17] <kayke> how many packets of top ramen do you think he's cookin in there?
[23:17] <autarch> what's his homeland, again?
[23:17] <bob511> Haiti
[23:17] <shalrunkabi> Sally is gonna get cooked
[23:17] <lhs> charlie bucket's mom's laundry cauldron
[23:17] <dan2_> damn
[23:17] <Trebbers> goddamn
[23:17] <autarch> wait. is he gonna kill sally?
[23:18] <kayke> sally doesn't believe in the death penalty
[23:18] <shalrunkabi> woof
[23:18] <lhs> !!?!?!
[23:18] <Trebbers> fuck
[23:18] <autarch> oh my fucking god
[23:18] <shrunkheadtist> oh gross
[23:18] <besoin> aghhhhh
[23:18] <bob511> Sheesh
[23:18] <autarch> this is so bad
[23:18] <kayke> hate this
[23:18] <Ampersand> aaaaagh
[23:18] <autarch> I HATE THIS
[23:18] <kayke> AAAH
[23:18] <shalrunkabi> booooooooo
[23:18] <kayke> don't fucking say "member" at us
[23:18] <Ampersand> midriffless gown
[23:18] <dan2_> this should realllllly be setting off some warning flags
[23:18] <kayke> sally doesn't have a lick of sense
[23:19] <pretty_yeoman> Ampersand I've never hoped more that you're wrong
[23:19] <kayke> but she looks good
[23:19] <shrunkheadtist> why does he have that
[23:19] <kayke> old hollywood
[23:19] <autarch> gross.
[23:19] <shrunkheadtist> why
[23:19] <Ampersand> political section???
[23:19] <pretty_yeoman> good damn question shrunkheadtist
[23:19] <autarch> she's still 15
[23:19] <autarch> yeah, that's some pizzagate shit.
[23:20] <pretty_yeoman> big mo save us
[23:20] <autarch> big moe please save this
[23:20] <kayke> Big Mo told him not to yell in front of Mitzy
[23:20] <autarch> uh oh
[23:20] <Trebbers> bad idea
[23:21] <autarch> save mitzy
[23:21] <autarch> what?
[23:21] <pretty_yeoman> big mo shoots like she's in an old hollywood gangster movie, cred
[23:22] <kayke> I am the gatekeeper
[23:22] <pretty_yeoman> nice, kayke
[23:22] <shalrunkabi> the original fidget spinner
[23:22] <autarch> consummated? gross
[23:22] <autarch> they're gonna cuck vin
[23:22] <bob511> By a condominium?
[23:22] <shalrunkabi> well that was easy
[23:23] <autarch> well at least she's with big moe now
[23:23] <besoin> elfman's finally boingoing
[23:23] <kayke> This is more lesbian representation than I've seen in any film this year
[23:24] <besoin> you didn't have to download this from the dark web or something did you, amp?
[23:24] <Ampersand> i didn't have to rip my VHS copy, thankfully
[23:24] <kayke> the shrunk web
[23:24] <autarch> kayke lol
[23:24] <autarch> after this movie? yeah, i DO want the world to end
[23:24] <kayke> louis ck?
[23:24] <besoin> no one make the joke
[23:25] <besoin> too late
[23:25] <pretty_yeoman> i had one half typed sorry sorry
[23:25] <kayke> sorry
[23:25] <pretty_yeoman> but isn't that an elfman?
[23:25] <shalrunkabi> what Talking Heads song is this
[23:25] <besoin> was that the director?
[23:25] <autarch> pull ovah
[23:25] <pretty_yeoman> yeah my hunch sez that was Danny
[23:26] <besoin> i think it was richard
[23:26] <kayke> nice cut away
[23:26] <pretty_yeoman> he had similarly animated cameo in Forbidden Zone
[23:26] <autarch> my pervert shrunken head bf is gonna eat ur ass, vinnie
[23:26] <dan2_> Oingo Boingo's "Little Girls" makes a lot more sense after watching this
[23:26] <pretty_yeoman> ah yeah maybe richard
[23:26] <besoin> tony scott killed himself on this bridge
[23:26] <rixx_> that was a great "holy shit:
[23:26] <autarch> hell yeah
[23:26] <Trebbers> Of course the black shrunken head has the switchblade
[23:27] <shalrunkabi> that effect cost 25 million $
[23:27] <pretty_yeoman> big mo zombie?
[23:27] <bob511> "The majority of the actors in the bus scene, with the exception of director Richard Elfman, were actually video store employees who won their roles as part of a contest."
[23:27] <kayke> Omg
[23:27] <autarch> oh god
[23:27] <Trebbers> ahaa
[23:27] <autarch> good deaths
[23:27] <shalrunkabi> ha
[23:27] <Ampersand> splatted heads
[23:27] <shalrunkabi> justified
[23:28] <autarch> look at me go
[23:28] <autarch> LOOK AT ME GO
[23:28] <kayke> omfg
[23:28] <Trebbers> oh man
[23:28] <shalrunkabi> fuuuuuck
[23:28] <besoin> dkkjdjkds
[23:28] <autarch> i'm dying
[23:28] <dan2_> now that's some road head
[23:28] <pretty_yeoman> DAN,
[23:28] <besoin> heh
[23:28] <kayke> lol dan
[23:28] <shalrunkabi> I'm dead dan
[23:28] <autarch> DAN!!
[23:28] <dan2_> I'm real real sorry everyone
[23:28] <autarch> you killed me dan
[23:28] <besoin> the head is farting in his mouth?
[23:28] <pretty_yeoman> difficult to say, besoin, difficult to say.
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[23:28] == shrunkheadtist_ [48b633b8@gateway/web/freenode/ip.72.182.51.184] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[23:28] <shrunkheadtist_> imagine being one of the kids in this
[23:29] <autarch> i'd rather not, tbh
[23:29] <besoin> sally is on general hospital now
[23:29] <Ampersand> aka shit
[23:29] <autarch> hat was easy
[23:29] <besoin> maybe should have done that earlier, thomas
[23:29] <shalrunkabi> he's gotta stop humblebragging about the condo
[23:29] <pretty_yeoman> "Roll a 4d and add 4, Sally"
[23:30] <lhs> at his consumminium
[23:30] <pretty_yeoman> heh
[23:30] <autarch> lol that condo
[23:30] <besoin> tommy played the young version of kiefer sutherland in flatliners
[23:30] <pretty_yeoman> Mitzi somehow manages to escape the movie unharmed
[23:30] <besoin> quite a resume
[23:30] <autarch> oh geez
[23:30] <kayke> go to that condo in florida big mo mentioned, that seems like a good place for Mitzy
[23:31] <Trebbers> fucked
[23:31] <dan2_> movie somehow got darker
[23:31] <autarch> yeah sumatra is not cool
[23:32] <autarch> oh sweet, free heads
[23:32] <shrunkheadtist_> oh no
[23:32] <besoin> she's really neglecting her homework
[23:32] <Ampersand> movie, give me just a lil' mo
[23:33] <pretty_yeoman> Sally please usher in a new era of less creepiness and misogyny
[23:33] <bob511> Really amazing that our hero figure was a mass murderer for Duvalier.
[23:33] <shalrunkabi> um
[23:33] <shrunkheadtist_> really thought she wa gonna have a different mission for them
[23:33] <shalrunkabi> what kind of ending was that
[23:33] <kayke> okaaay
[23:33] <autarch> yeah
[23:33] <pretty_yeoman> Aeryk Egan was skyrocketing long before the rest of the kids
[23:33] <autarch> that was really something
[23:33] <pretty_yeoman> yeah that was nutz
[23:33] <kayke> she's a high priestess now, just like she always wanted
[23:34] <dan2_> Slim Jim Ballard
[23:34] <besoin> jock skrellington's theme
[23:34] <autarch> that was fucking insane
[23:34] <Ampersand> i think there might be an after credits scene
[23:34] == Trebbers [46a05dec@gateway/web/freenode/ip.70.160.93.236] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[23:34] <Ampersand> can't recall for certain
[23:34] <kayke> this should never be shown to anyone ever again
[23:34] <besoin> "Meg Foster has cited Big Moe as one of the best characters she has ever played."
[23:34] <autarch> yeah, this should be banned
[23:35] <pretty_yeoman> yeah i kind of like to think of hpn movie series as ceremonially putting problematic shit like this to bed forever
[23:35] <kayke> I cite big moe as one of the best characters I've ever seen
[23:35] <bob511> Wait, there were digital effects in this?
[23:35] <pretty_yeoman> at least with a lot of our picks
[23:35] <rixx_> so many people involved....how
[23:35] <bob511> All video store employees.
[23:35] <pretty_yeoman> heh
[23:35] <shrunkheadtist_> i don't know if we're getting more
[23:36] <shalrunkabi> nobody stepped up to say "this is a bad idea"
[23:36] <besoin> assistant to bennah burton-burtt
[23:36] <shrunkheadtist_> ah oingo boingo
[23:36] <autarch> big moe was great
[23:36] <besoin> good old eric satie
[23:36] <Ampersand> thanks, Leonard
[23:36] <autarch> musical thanks to eric satie and leonard bernstein
[23:36] <kayke> I'd watch a big moe spin off
[23:36] <rixx_> you can buy the soundtrack
[23:36] <shrunkheadtist_> we do need to put together a definitive list of best characters in worst movies
[23:36] <rixx_> damn
[23:36] <pretty_yeoman> yeah big moe should cross universes and be in other movies
[23:36] <autarch> oh wow
[23:37] <besoin> god in heaven
[23:37] <autarch> what?
[23:37] <bob511> Blugh!
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Postby Ampersand » Mon Oct 15, 2018 1:00 pm

This Thursday,
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Oct 17, 2018 11:32 am

This Thursday:
VAN
HEL
SIN
G!!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 18, 2018 11:52 am

Tonight! Check th dB to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 18, 2018 2:54 pm

Ampersand wrote:Tonight! Check th dB to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 18, 2018 9:07 pm

1 hour until SLAYIN' TIME!
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 18, 2018 9:52 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Van Helsing
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Oct 18, 2018 10:08 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Van Helsing
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Postby Ampersand » Fri Oct 19, 2018 12:21 am

Code: Select all
[22:10] <Ampersand> 3
[22:10] <Ampersand> 2
[22:10] <Ampersand> 1
[22:10] <Trebbers> Dracula sucked out the color
[22:10] <Trebbers> motherfucker
[22:10] <Ampersand> just like old times
[22:10] <Shalabi> woah
[22:11] <van_autarch> global warming
[22:11] <dan_helsing> angry mobs lighting up the entire earth feels pretty prescient
[22:11] <Ampersand> THIS is what socialists WANT
[22:11] <Shalabi> this is artsy
[22:11] <Trebbers> a mob
[22:11] <dan_helsing> should have gotten a NO SOLICITORS sign bro
[22:12] <van_autarch> when you're hungry and waiting for subway to open
[22:12] == vanquallsing [c045b71a@gateway/web/freenode/ip.192.69.183.26] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:12] <Ampersand> drac has some big queer energy
[22:12] <lhs> wait is this a comedy
[22:12] <bob511> Kind of
[22:12] <Ampersand> welcome, DJ Qualls
[22:13] <van_autarch> dexter's la-bore-a-tory
[22:13] <vanquallsing> hey
[22:13] <vanquallsing> time?
[22:13] <Ampersand> 2:35
[22:13] <Ampersand> 2:45
[22:13] <dan_helsing> 3:00 in 15
[22:13] <van_autarch> 3:00
[22:13] <Ampersand> 3
[22:13] <dan_helsing> why is the London After Midnight creep leading the mob?
[22:13] <dan_helsing> 3:00
[22:13] <bob511> Dracula just pitched a live-action Frankenweenie adaptation.
[22:13] <van_autarch> dan, you're like 10 seconds too late
[22:13] <Trebbers> "I will only use him for sex"
[22:14] <Trebbers> What the fuck is this
[22:14] <vanquallsing> some goofy shit going on here
[22:14] <dan_helsing> Van Beltsing
[22:14] <Ampersand> 3:45
[22:14] <van_autarch> who dat?
[22:14] <Ampersand> these monsters have taken their mashing too hard
[22:14] <Ampersand> holy
[22:15] <Trebbers> woah
[22:15] <vanquallsing> lol
[22:15] <Trebbers> Renfeld looks like a Sleepwalker
[22:15] <Shalabi> van throwsthings
[22:15] <van_autarch> who is the gary busey looking guy?
[22:15] <bob511> Roger Ebert: "Strange that a movie so eager to entertain would forget to play "Monster Mash" over the end credits. "
[22:15] <Ampersand> igor?
[22:15] <van_autarch> wait, he said something about frankenstein?
[22:15] <van_besoin> it's the mummy
[22:16] <Trebbers> dick shaped windmill
[22:16] <dan_helsing> is The Mast one of the original Universal Monsters?
[22:16] <dan_helsing> *Mask
[22:16] <van_autarch> what is this mob of people doing?
[22:16] <van_besoin> why is the time warp guy there
[22:16] == Ampersand has changed nick to Vampersand
[22:16] <van_autarch> you can't crack the drack
[22:16] <dan_helsing> Edgar Winter turning on his fellow monsters
[22:16] <van_besoin> heh
[22:16] <Trebbers> Time for an epic stage dive
[22:17] <Vampersand> WAAAAAAHHHHH
[22:17] <Trebbers> shjsjh
[22:17] <dan_helsing> WILLLLLLLSON
[22:17] <van_autarch> why are all these non-drac monsters getting involved? what's with all this crossover stuff?
[22:17] <van_besoin> peter boyle is irrepressible
[22:17] <Trebbers> This was going to be a franchise
[22:17] <van_autarch> so, that was frankenstein?
[22:18] <bob511> No, that was Frankenstein's monster, duh.
[22:18] <van_besoin> suddenly it's cougartown
[22:18] <lhs> league of extraordinary ghouls
[22:18] <Vampersand> positively jam-packed 8 minutes
[22:18] <Vampersand> LOL
[22:18] <van_besoin> 1888 was in color
[22:18] <Vampersand> was not expecting one year
[22:18] <van_besoin> i checked wikipedia
[22:18] <sideshowraheem> between this and league of extraordinary gentlemen there were a couple of years where people couldn't get enough of classic monster mash ups
[22:18] <van_autarch> amp, how did you change your nickname?
[22:19] <Vampersand> arguably, they didn't get any of it
[22:19] <Trebbers> This fucking music
[22:19] <vanquallsing> use '/nick' followed by what you want
[22:19] <Vampersand> yep
[22:19] == van_autarch has changed nick to autarch
[22:19] <van_besoin> very stealthy
[22:20] <lhs> boss fight already?
[22:20] <autarch> is that bob downey?
[22:20] <Trebbers> Oh lordy
[22:20] <autarch> or jack black?
[22:20] <Vampersand> this is nearly the same Hyde design as in LOEG
[22:20] <autarch> who is the big guy?
[22:20] <Vampersand> with a little more Shrek thrown in
[22:20] <van_besoin> looks like that giant what tried to kill mickey
[22:20] <autarch> oh wait that's mr. hyde?
[22:21] <lhs> where does one get burrito-sized cigars
[22:21] <autarch> mr.hyde looks like a giant mel gibson
[22:21] <Shalabi> van shoot'ing
[22:21] <van_besoin> he forced carmen to roll it in the prequel
[22:21] <vanquallsing> mel bigson
[22:21] <Vampersand> the whole thing about Mr. Hyde is that he's a SMALL little man ape
[22:21] <autarch> van melsing
[22:21] <Shalabi> so he's basically the hulk
[22:22] <lhs> this is some looney tunes shit
[22:22] <vanquallsing> helsing is some kind of off brand steam punk batman?
[22:22] <autarch> that's not even a good one-liner
[22:22] <dan_helsing> "Aint I a stinker?"
[22:22] <autarch> nice plumbers crack
[22:22] <autarch> "rather shrektacular"
[22:23] <dan_helsing> this owes so much to Devil May Cry
[22:23] <Shalabi> interesting van physics
[22:23] <autarch> hahaha
[22:23] <van_besoin> i wish this chat had a dark mode
[22:23] <Trebbers> Fucking idiocy
[22:23] <Vampersand> interesting Hyde anatomy
[22:23] <van_besoin> missed cameo opportunity there
[22:24] <dan_helsing> if you click the 3 horizontal bars at the top left you can change the background color a bit in options
[22:24] <autarch> oh, THAT vatican city
[22:24] <dan_helsing> can't really get it dark but you can experiment
[22:24] <van_besoin> yeah, dan, i made it a kind of rose color
[22:25] <dan_helsing> I ususally go for a deep orange
[22:25] <lhs> the most wanted man in europe is fabio
[22:25] <Vampersand> your methods, Van Cobra, are unacceptable
[22:26] <van_besoin> we have to suffer through stephen sommers's players here
[22:26] <van_besoin> same actors from the mummy
[22:26] <autarch> use this chrome extension: https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/dark-mode/dmghijelimhndkbmpgbldicpogfkceaj/related?hl=en
[22:26] <dan_helsing> four HAAHHNdred
[22:27] <vanquallsing> lol
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[22:27] <Trebbers> The order has photography really figured out
[22:27] <van_besoin> doesn't work on this site, autarch
[22:27] <Vampersand> innamaahhner
[22:27] <autarch_> yeah it does. you just have to refresh
[22:27] <Shalabi> pretty good lost and found
[22:28] == van_besoin [600a27e6@gateway/web/freenode/ip.96.10.39.230] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[22:28] == autarch_ has changed nick to autarch
[22:28] == besoin [600a27e6@gateway/web/freenode/ip.96.10.39.230] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:28] <bob511> I assume Uwe Boll was told the same thing.
[22:28] <besoin> much better
[22:28] <autarch> yeah this is nice
[22:29] <autarch> oh wow, I'm looking at the progress bar and this movie must be at least 2 hours long
[22:29] <autarch> maybe closer to 2 and a half
[22:29] <besoin> there should be a name for these equipment scenes
[22:29] <besoin> i fucking hate them
[22:29] <Trebbers> I knew we were going to get a fucking Q scne
[22:29] <Shalabi> bloop
[22:29] <dan_helsing> MI666
[22:29] <autarch> is that just a jug of lemonade?
[22:30] <lhs> inventory tutorial
[22:30] <besoin> remember the Q scene in xXx
[22:30] <besoin> this isn't domhnall gleeson's best work
[22:30] <bob511> Yes, how would a sun bomb be useful against vampires?
[22:30] <autarch> there were multiple, iirc. the Q character wanted to be a badass secret agent.
[22:30] <Trebbers> oh yeah he tagged along
[22:31] <autarch> I really hate the vaguely english accent that actors put on for any oldtimey person or european.
[22:31] <dan_helsing> Bored at the Stake
[22:32] <Trebbers> Butt first reveal
[22:32] <besoin> uh oh, sexy captain morgan
[22:32] <bob511> Kate, you race  traitor.
[22:32] <Vampersand> lol besoin
[22:32] <bob511> Oh, wait.
[22:32] == lhsing [49dd9b0f@gateway/web/freenode/ip.73.221.155.15] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:32] <Shalabi> van shesing
[22:32] <bob511> I guess I forget who's a werewolf and who's a vampire.
[22:32] <Shalabi> shelving?
[22:32] <Trebbers> Bram Stoker's Mousetrap
[22:32] <besoin> his name is pelican?
[22:32] == lhs [49dd9b0f@gateway/web/freenode/ip.73.221.155.15] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[22:32] <autarch> what's the hurry to shoot at it? why not wait until the guy is not so close?
[22:33] <Vampersand> this pacing just won't quit
[22:33] <autarch> ah, drat, the a clif
[22:33] <dan_helsing> so is this one of those daytime werewolves?
[22:33] <autarch> hold up a sign that says "OW!"
[22:33] <sideshowraheem> they need to introduce a new monster every 5 minutes of the bus explodes
[22:33] <Vampersand> yeah like in Twilight
[22:33] <besoin> we should have watched underworld
[22:33] <sideshowraheem> or*
[22:34] <Shalabi> I got this confused with Underworld actually
[22:34] <Shalabi> I thought it was all vampires
[22:34] <besoin> the score is truly horrible
[22:34] <autarch> yeah this is really bad
[22:34] <autarch> what instrument is that, even? is it an electric guitar that isn't plugged in?
[22:34] <Trebbers> Almost like they've superimposed two shitty scores apop one another
[22:35] <Shalabi> Lord of the Helsings
[22:35] <autarch> cuz he's bad
[22:35] <autarch> whoa, steampunk
[22:35] <besoin> huge time warp dance number incoming
[22:35] <vanquallsing> dragula looking sumbitch
[22:36] <autarch> can't get over that guy's outfit
[22:36] <autarch> "I'll kill all of you"
[22:36] <Trebbers> *farts*
[22:36] <Vampersand> lol at nobody else seeing the snarling harpies
[22:36] <dan_helsing> almost 5 minutes, cuttin it close
[22:36] <Shalabi> he's not hitting shit
[22:37] <Trebbers> what
[22:37] <autarch> hoo boy
[22:37] <besoin> they didn't make that obvious enough for us
[22:37] <besoin> should have been like 9 seconds longer, a few more angles
[22:37] <lhsing> almost passed the bechdel test
[22:37] <bob511> Cow
[22:38] <Vampersand> these poor, poor cement bat gremlins... they only fly for a few minutes before drying into gargoyles
[22:38] <autarch> fellas, I think the lady who fell on his face might be the love interest?
[22:38] <dan_helsing> so I guess the cow was the stranger?
[22:38] <autarch> oh good, just an expendable character
[22:38] == sideshowraheem [ae77b90e@gateway/web/freenode/ip.174.119.185.14] has quit [Ping timeout: 256 seconds]
[22:38] <Shalabi> the cow was audience surrogate
[22:38] <dan_helsing> Yam Helsing
[22:38] <autarch> talk about a rough neighborhood.
[22:38] <besoin> cow was the producers
[22:38] <dan_helsing> maybe those are turnips, disregard
[22:38] <bob511> Cow survived Twister, decided to backpack Europe, and this happens.
[22:39] <besoin> what is kate beckinsale even up to
[22:40] <autarch> she dead
[22:40] <autarch> CTE
[22:40] <Vampersand> this would make a good Time Crisis game at the arcade
[22:41] <autarch> love the little ornate sculpture at the end of the crossbow
[22:41] <dan_helsing> sfx were def. stirring some mac & cheese
[22:42] <besoin> kate is invincible
[22:42] <Vampersand> loool
[22:42] <lhsing> gloop
[22:42] <Trebbers> This scene is taking forever
[22:42] <vanquallsing> this fucking movie
[22:42] <Vampersand> wow i didn't know my blood was perfect
[22:42] <Vampersand> i feel ripe
[22:43] <besoin> finish him
[22:43] <Shalabi> triple combo!!
[22:43] <autarch> are arthur and jonathan harker and seward and quincey morris even going to show up?
[22:44] <autarch> does this movie have any dracula characters other than van helsing and drac? is mina in it? or lucy?
[22:44] <besoin> no
[22:44] <Vampersand> incredible
[22:44] <Shalabi> that's a gif right there
[22:44] <autarch> tfw
[22:44] <Trebbers> ahahahah
[22:44] <Shalabi> oh thank god
[22:45] <Trebbers> No animals were harmed
[22:45] <dan_helsing> *crowd erupts with cheers*
[22:45] <Vampersand> "HELL YEA FRANKIESTEIN"
[22:45] <vanquallsing> i don't get a good vibe from this top hat guy
[22:45] <Trebbers> Crowd ADR by Eric Idle
[22:45] <lhsing> whoops
[22:45] <besoin> kind of a seven samurai thing going on here
[22:45] <autarch> huh?
[22:45] <bob511> One or two a month?  What kind of birthrate are we looking at for this tiny village?
[22:46] <autarch> uh. what?
[22:46] <Shalabi> what the fuck
[22:46] <dan_helsing> overact-ula
[22:46] <besoin> these poor actresses
[22:47] <autarch> the part where dracula walks up the walls was one of the scariest parts of the book. this is not doing it justice.
[22:47] <Vampersand> playing to the back row
[22:47] <besoin> drac looks like a drag elaine benes
[22:47] <Trebbers> Wait who are these dudes
[22:47] <autarch> this is like how johnny depp would play fabio
[22:48] <autarch> in a tim burton movie
[22:48] <Trebbers> lololol
[22:48] <Vampersand> this is pitched at a level that is giving me anxiety
[22:49] <Trebbers> what
[22:49] <dan_helsing> wow
[22:49] <lhsing> steampunk doozers
[22:49] <autarch> Professor Stein. Frank N. Stein
[22:50] <besoin> i seenk you're a mansplainer
[22:50] <autarch> hmmm
[22:50] <autarch> thought-provoking stuff, van
[22:51] <autarch> he can't decide whether or not to stick to the english accent
[22:51] <Trebbers> oh no
[22:51] <autarch> van wtf
[22:51] <besoin> van cosby
[22:51] <autarch> i thought i was watching van helsing, not van wilder
[22:52] <Vampersand> lol
[22:52] <vanquallsing> i call bullshit on this lantern. casts virtually no light
[22:52] <autarch> jfc we're not even a third of the way through
[22:53] <lhsing> a thanksgiving hand turkey infestation
[22:53] <dan_helsing> whole movie feels like it's playing in fast-forward but still somehow going painfully slow
[22:53] <besoin> i'm getting a little sleepy
[22:53] <besoin> need a new monster
[22:53] <Trebbers> Why did they think it was acceptable for it to drag like this
[22:53] <autarch> this is the POV of a shrunken head
[22:54] <vanquallsing> was hoping for the creature from the black lagoon
[22:54] <Vampersand> they gave us all the monsters too quickly
[22:54] <autarch> who is this?
[22:54] <besoin> her brother
[22:54] <besoin> the one who fell off the cliff
[22:54] <lhsing> suburban sasquatch
[22:54] <autarch> this is bad acting
[22:54] <Shalabi> oh good, I was getting bored
[22:54] <autarch> looks like he's in a sia music video
[22:54] <besoin> it can't be her husband because she has to be sexually available to van helsing
[22:55] <autarch> there's too many monsters in this thing. this movie lacks focus.
[22:55] <dan_helsing> Ana and the Thing
[22:55] <Shalabi> he probably needs that skin
[22:55] <besoin> that's just the cgi, autarch
[22:55] <dan_helsing> and he doesn't even pick up his skin, how rude
[22:55] <besoin> heyyooooo
[22:55] <autarch> is this guy supposed to be comic relief?
[22:55] <Shalabi> *van rimshot*
[22:56] <autarch> looks like kid rock
[22:56] <Vampersand> or Charles Cullen
[22:56] <autarch> this guy again
[22:57] <lhsing> well, bye
[22:57] <autarch> "no"
[22:58] <autarch> what was that sound he made when he let go of her?
[22:58] <besoin> i'd probably move
[22:59] <lhsing> side quest accepted
[22:59] <Vampersand> "to have no dialogue is perhaps better than to have any dialogue at all"
[23:00] <bob511> Goth jawas.
[23:00] <dan_helsing> Gloompa Loompas
[23:00] <lhsing> haha
[23:00] <autarch> as everyone knows
[23:01] <autarch> that's not werewolf canon, they just put that in there to add a sense of urgency, and it didn't work
[23:02] <bob511> Good thing for the MPAA rating Wolfman dressed in layers.
[23:02] <autarch> I recognize that skeleton anywhere!
[23:03] <autarch> nice twirl, drac
[23:03] <dan_helsing> so far these little guys are the only characters I like
[23:04] == Trebbers [46a05dec@gateway/web/freenode/ip.70.160.93.236] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[23:04] <Vampersand> "brussel sprouts"
[23:04] <dan_helsing> so...is Dracula trying to make a Frankenstein out of a Werewolf?
[23:05] <Vampersand> Dracula has troll fever
[23:05] <Shalabi> Frankenfusion
[23:05] <besoin> the foley
[23:05] <autarch> nice sound effects
[23:05] <bob511> So annoying when one of your spawn sacks has a short, but they're in series so all of them don't work.
[23:06] <dan_helsing> Now you're playing with (werewolf) Power
[23:06] <Vampersand> toot
[23:06] <autarch> please just let the baby dracs kill them right here so the movie can end and we get 3 hours of credits
[23:06] <besoin> i might have to tap out soon
[23:06] <dan_helsing> what you're up against: the world's biggest bag of Gushers
[23:06] <Vampersand> please extend this scene for 3 hours
[23:07] <lhsing> vampinata
[23:07] <vanquallsing> vimpions
[23:07] <dan_helsing> narrative wise this really seems like it should be over within the next 15 minutes
[23:08] <Vampersand> why does Drac want this
[23:09] <autarch> this movie stinks
[23:09] <autarch> not even in a funny way
[23:09] <Vampersand> stinks like baby bat piss
[23:10] <autarch> i can't stand this steampunk crap
[23:10] <lhsing> RIP cow
[23:10] <besoin> i'm falling asleep
[23:11] <besoin> night folks
[23:11] <vanquallsing> later
[23:11] <lhsing> night
[23:11] == besoin [600a27e6@gateway/web/freenode/ip.96.10.39.230] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[23:11] <Vampersand> you tried
[23:11] <autarch> Dracula is a fucking great story and you want to take all of the characters out of it, except 2, and replace them with characters from other books who don't fit together?
[23:11] <dan_helsing> moreso than anything else we've watched in recent memory this really is just noise
[23:11] <autarch> What a fucking catastrophe that this got a $160 million budget.
[23:12] <autarch> there is nothing captivating about this film
[23:12] <autarch> the story is so bad
[23:12] <lhsing> there's a story?
[23:12] <Shalabi> but...
[23:12] <Shalabi> there are monsters
[23:12] <Vampersand> yeah these are events
[23:12] <Shalabi> checkmate
[23:12] <Vampersand> not story
[23:13] <autarch> more monsters=more drama
[23:13] <Vampersand> gabriel... i am your brotha
[23:13] <autarch> this SHOULD be the final showdown, not the fucking 45% marker
[23:14] <autarch> imagine having to edit or direct this movie and watch this footage for days on end
[23:14] <autarch> PLEASE KILL HER
[23:15] <Vampersand> i cannot imagine what's left
[23:15] <autarch> He just referenced van helsing's past. I don't think we were ever made aware of this past.
[23:15] <autarch> I don't even know who just got carried off by bats because it's too dark
[23:15] <autarch> nothing has even happened.
[23:16] <lhsing> still plenty of time for dorian gray to show up
[23:16] <autarch> here's what i know: the non-love interest knows one of the white ghoulish flying bat ladies, and dracula seems to be doing experiments on a wolf guy who I think is the non-love interest's brother.
[23:16] <autarch> That's all I know
[23:17] <autarch> and he keeps falling into a fucking ravine.
[23:17] <dan_helsing> does going from werewolf back to human this many times in a week mess up your skin?
[23:17] <autarch> he saved her?
[23:17] <Vampersand> woof
[23:17] <vanquallsing> balls to this movie
[23:17] <bob511> Friar Fuck
[23:18] <autarch> why is Q in every scene? Makes no sense. You get 1 (ONE) Q scene per movie, plus maybe 2 brief cameos in other scenes.
[23:18] <autarch> THis fucking sucks.
[23:18] <autarch> Too late. It's too late for them to start bonding.
[23:19] <autarch> Should have happened IN THE FIRST HOUR GOD DAMNIT.
[23:19] <bob511> Got keep that HP up.
[23:19] <lhsing> Rated PG-13 for nonstop creature action violence and frightening images, and for sensuality
[23:19] <Vampersand> fried
[23:19] <vanquallsing> he's all fuckered out
[23:19] <Vampersand> lol
[23:19] <autarch> please tell me it was all a dream and that that's sean william scott and now we get 2/3 of an american pie movie.
[23:19] <dan_helsing> gotta credit the MPAA for making sure they designated that it was "nonstop" creature action violence
[23:20] <autarch> STOP
[23:20] <lhsing> finish us
[23:20] <dan_helsing> the world's first .gif
[23:20] <autarch> This is opening credits shit. Not halfway through the movie shit.
[23:21] <autarch> that was not scary at all
[23:22] <autarch> please just bring in a steampunk robert oppenheimer too make it all go away
[23:22] <autarch> yes, kill him
[23:23] <autarch> Wait, frankenstein's monster gets his own side-story?
[23:23] <autarch> this movie is giving me alzheimers
[23:23] <lhsing> i'm just going to close my eyes and pretend we're watching ryan's babe
[23:24] <Vampersand> lol
[23:24] <autarch> lol
[23:25] <autarch> anyone else in favor of watching the rest of this in 2x speed?
[23:25] <lhsing> dueling zithers
[23:25] <Vampersand> it would kill us
[23:25] <Vampersand> this is already 4x speed
[23:25] <autarch> it would save us
[23:25] <dan_helsing> we aren't already watching this at 2x?
[23:26] <Vampersand> this is the only scene i remember from it
[23:26] <Vampersand> for some reason, an exploding carriage stuck in my memory
[23:26] <autarch> god damn it
[23:27] <lhsing> ichabad crane
[23:27] <Shalabi> there is so much movie left
[23:27] <autarch> the 6 seconds of peace and quiet on the carriage was the only watchable moment of this movie
[23:27] <autarch> fuck this
[23:27] <autarch> fuck that fucking jump
[23:27] <autarch> why does he have to be jumping on the outside of the carriag?
[23:27] <Shalabi> I bet you age slower than the people around you when watching this
[23:28] <bob511> These women are really determined not to let anyone defect to the Dungeon Siege set.
[23:28] <vanquallsing> wtf
[23:28] <Vampersand> what
[23:28] <Vampersand> got 'em
[23:28] <autarch> explosion makes sense
[23:28] <autarch> why won't the action ever stop?
[23:29] <lhsing> we could have just watched two episodes of true blood
[23:30] <dan_helsing> thinking about how numbing this must have been to watch in a theater
[23:30] <autarch> god that cgi fire
[23:30] <Vampersand> i never thought i'd fondly contrast Seventh Son with anything
[23:30] <bob511> This may have been the first in-theater movie Catullus watched with my family.
[23:31] <lhsing> what is the brother's name? i keep hearing valkilmer
[23:31] <Shalabi> we could pretend the movie ends here
[23:31] <autarch> yeah, it's valkilmer
[23:31] <lhsing> cool
[23:31] <Shalabi> here we go again!
[23:32] <autarch> this scene again?
[23:32] <autarch> please, bat lady, take her out of this movie
[23:32] <lhsing> the bats are back in town
[23:32] <Vampersand> the Frankenstein's Monster makeup cost 160 million dollars
[23:32] <vanquallsing> lol
[23:33] <autarch> between this and Rise of Cobra, the director got $335 million of budget. for 2 shitflixe.
[23:33] <autarch> at least rise of cobra was funny.
[23:33] <dan_helsing> on the brightside, it seems as thought he isn't making movies anymore
[23:34] <autarch> It costed 160 million dollars to make because they had to spend so much on mental health services to prevent the entire crew from committing suicide.
[23:34] <lhsing> i'm enjoying how much you hate this, autarch
[23:35] <autarch> is this a heineken commercial?
[23:35] <autarch> this scene looks like a heinieken commercia
[23:35] <vanquallsing> i think i see a drackela
[23:35] <Vampersand> Fangs Wide Shut
[23:35] <dan_helsing> breakdancing table seems to be in an awkward spot
[23:36] <lhsing> suck du non-soleil
[23:36] <Vampersand> let's fuck and make pod people
[23:37] <Shalabi> was this necessary?
[23:38] <vanquallsing> this score really swashbuckles
[23:38] <bob511> Every one of Beckensale's joints must be dislocated by now.
[23:38] <lhsing> living in a frankster's paradise
[23:39] <autarch> imagine screaming that while chained to a stretcher
[23:39] <autarch> and being carried through a masquerade
[23:39] <autarch> lol lhs
[23:39] <Vampersand> now i know that the Scream mask is the ghost of a vampire
[23:39] <autarch> that's like the 8th window that's been jumped through
[23:40] <dan_helsing> is Frankenstein going to jail?
[23:41] <autarch> who read this script and was like "Spare no expense making this film, even if it takes $160 million"
[23:41] <lhsing> frankenstein will come back in 20 years as the count of monte cristo
[23:41] <vanquallsing> this movie was written by no one
[23:41] <lhsing> the script is three pages long
[23:42] <lhsing> and 75% of it just says "monster swings on rope"
[23:42] <dan_helsing> and in crayon
[23:42] <autarch> hahaha
[23:42] <lhsing> the first mad magazine
[23:44] <lhsing> oh it's a dance studio
[23:44] == sideshowraheem [d04149db@gateway/web/freenode/ip.208.65.73.219] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[23:45] <sideshowraheem> time check?
[23:45] <Vampersand> infinity
[23:45] <Vampersand> or 1:34:45
[23:45] <Vampersand> 1:35
[23:45] <sideshowraheem> gimme 1:36 please
[23:45] <Vampersand> k
[23:45] <Vampersand> your funeral
[23:45] <Shalabi> gimme end of the movie pls
[23:46] <sideshowraheem> sounds like I've missed a real hum dinger
[23:46] <vanquallsing> it's gonna be pretty hard to follow the plot, raheem
[23:46] <lhsing> it's going to end with the winter olympics
[23:46] <vanquallsing> having missed so much
[23:46] <Vampersand> 1:36
[23:46] <dan_helsing> Van Greenscreen
[23:46] <bob511> Now we have to go through the entire movie again, but upside down.
[23:46] <sideshowraheem> thank you
[23:46] <dan_helsing> lol
[23:47] <lhsing> what
[23:47] <Vampersand> mighty burp, excuse him
[23:47] <lhsing> when did he become a vampire
[23:47] <autarch> i want to die
[23:48] <sideshowraheem> was he a secret vamp all along?
[23:48] <vanquallsing> helsing got bit by a woofman
[23:48] <Vampersand> Frankenstein's monster's skull doubles as a bowl full of lime jello
[23:48] <bob511> Frankensicle.
[23:49] <lhsing> "i don't care" -- the writers
[23:49] <sideshowraheem> what
[23:50] <Vampersand> Igor is a like a handsome Robert Davi
[23:50] <lhsing> today i learned that the most important thing you need in order to make a movie is hubris
[23:51] <bob511> Did everyone steal werewolves-are-poisonous-to-draculas from Vampire: The Masquerade etc., or was there something before that?
[23:51] <bob511> Like, I know they sued Underworld over it.
[23:52] <dan_helsing> I feel like you're going to need an army of Frankensteins to power a place that big
[23:52] <autarch> i've been playing guitar for a while what (if anything) has happened?
[23:53] <autarch> oh garey busey is helping them now?
[23:53] <vanquallsing> gray busey
[23:53] <sideshowraheem> they threatened to cut his dick off
[23:54] <vanquallsing> wire minion is going off
[23:54] <vanquallsing> just all over the place
[23:54] <lhsing> RIP 10th window
[23:54] <bob511> Dracula dental plan is surprisingly poor.
[23:54] <autarch> i wish they'd cut mine off just so this movie could make me feel something
[23:54] <autarch> that mouth
[23:55] <Shalabi> lol
[23:55] <lhsing> it was full of man's best friend piss
[23:55] <Vampersand> resting Crypt face
[23:55] <autarch> no, I'm talking about a different viscous material that makes women scream in terror when I splatter it all over the room.
[23:56] <autarch> -Q
[23:57] <bob511> It's alive....er.
[23:58] <dan_helsing> good news: the chapter titles seem to indicate that the end credits are 10 minutes long
[23:59] <Vampersand> yesss
[23:59] <dan_helsing> bad news: there's still 14 minutes left
[23:59] <sideshowraheem> they should have chopped Igor in half
[23:59] <Shalabi> wow
[23:59] <bob511> ::explosion::
[00:00] <autarch> god they didn't do anything right in this movie
[00:00] <dan_helsing> so her...skeleton is giving off some kind of heat signature?
[00:00] <autarch> no, what you're supposed to say is "But you're not supposed to be in this movie"
[00:00] <Shalabi> there is very little death in this movie for all the violence
[00:00] <Vampersand> lol
[00:01] <bob511> I don't know, that little guy probably isn't going to make it.
[00:01] <Shalabi> spoke too soon
[00:01] <autarch> lot of sparks budget in this scene
[00:01] <sideshowraheem> hasn't perfected the CGI on the transition, his head looked huge
[00:02] <autarch> jesus fucking christ, Van Helsing's name isn't even gabriel. It's fucking abraham.
[00:02] <autarch> Did they not read dracula?
[00:03] <Vampersand> what's a read?
[00:04] <Vampersand> Tarzan's Transylvanian Adventure
[00:04] <Vampersand> dead
[00:04] <autarch> god, their swinging budget was insane
[00:04] <autarch> so excited for this movie to end
[00:05] <bob511> Dracula got bugzapped
[00:05] <autarch> this is mucinex commercial-level CGI
[00:05] <lhsing> i think they only read LEG comics
[00:05] <dan_helsing> lol
[00:05] <Shalabi> good news guys, I looked it up, there's only 10 seconds of credits
[00:05] <lhsing> hooray
[00:05] <bob511> Speaking of mucinex commercials...
[00:06] <autarch> that line was she said when killing her was too unwieldy
[00:06] <dan_helsing> why doesn't Jackman just use some of that knockout spray he has on dracula
[00:06] <dan_helsing> seemed pretty strong
[00:06] <vanquallsing> had jackman already played wooferine at this point
[00:06] <autarch> seriously
[00:06] <Vampersand> yes
[00:06] <sideshowraheem> oh yes
[00:07] <autarch> shocker
[00:07] <autarch> 2 in the pink 1 in the stink
[00:07] <lhsing> haha, rrrrr!
[00:07] <bob511> "Like what accent I'm using."
[00:07] <autarch> like this movie
[00:07] <lhsing> whoa it was in normal speed for a second
[00:08] <Vampersand> werewolf enema
[00:08] <autarch> please be deaed
[00:08] <lhsing> what deviantart person designed this werewolf
[00:08] <sideshowraheem> ahahaha
[00:08] <Vampersand> lolllll
[00:08] <Shalabi> jesus
[00:08] <autarch> hahaha
[00:08] <autarch> that moan
[00:09] <sideshowraheem> Darth Vader No level
[00:09] <autarch> god, there's still a good 10 minutes left I think
[00:09] <sideshowraheem> "good"
[00:10] <sideshowraheem> well at least the frankenstein lived
[00:10] <Vampersand> when the fidget spinner in Frank's head stop spinning, what then?
[00:10] <lhsing> they really shouldn't have let him wear a beanie between takes
[00:10] <autarch> yeah, "see you in the next movie"
[00:10] <dan_helsing> but at what cost
[00:10] <autarch> $160 million, apparently
[00:10] <Vampersand> our final monster: ghosts
[00:11] <lhsing> he will kill death itself
[00:11] <Vampersand> Hurrican Heist: Origins
[00:11] <autarch> this would have been much more watchable if james franco played van helsing
[00:11] <autarch> whoa, that cloud looks just like a woman
[00:11] <Vampersand> why would they kill her off
[00:12] <autarch> what's that fire for?
[00:12] <Vampersand> the fuck is he smiling about? his paycheck?
[00:12] <autarch> stone henge
[00:12] <autarch> nice
[00:12] <dan_helsing> riding away from the music
[00:12] <Vampersand> LOL
[00:12] <sideshowraheem> poor dad
[00:12] <autarch> hahahhaha
[00:12] <vanquallsing> sommers you fuck
[00:12] <lhsing> i hate my dad
[00:12] <sideshowraheem> looking down from a cloud on this shit
[00:12] <dan_helsing> oh poor daddy
[00:12] <autarch> fuck
[00:13] <autarch> i hated that
[00:13] <autarch> i had to step away for a while
[00:13] <dan_helsing> Dad is up in heaven telling everyone there "No no, my kid is a different Steven Sommers"
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Postby Ampersand » Sat Oct 20, 2018 11:17 am

This Sunday,
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Postby Oh! Sweet Nuthin' » Sat Oct 20, 2018 2:47 pm

Ampersand wrote:This Sunday,
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definitely remember watching the TV version of this one Sunday afternoon on the tiny set in my bedroom. That and Child's Play 2 stick out, though there were a ton more horror movies I saw with all the gore cut out
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 21, 2018 10:19 am

bump. Tonight!
Check the db to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 21, 2018 2:18 pm

Ampersand wrote:bump. Tonight!
Check the db to join!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 21, 2018 8:06 pm

Two hours until showtime!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 21, 2018 9:52 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION: Pinocchio's Revenge
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https://webchat.freenode.net/
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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