Teachers of comp: post best student sentences

[addison]

what's worse is working on a literary journal where literally no one has read david foster wallace and watching people be impressed by obvious and badly-written knockoffs of his voice
and further impressed to the point of laughter by such phrase-turns as "epic bouts of masturbation" and afterward commenting how original and funny the phrase is and how they'll always remember it

[The Emperor's Son]

These are both from the same girl in a 10th grade english class. When talking to her, you'd have no idea she was literally brainless:

9-11, was a horrible tradgedy, tons of lives were lost, did this experience lifted the American sprit? Or down it? These questions are asked. Out of all the lives lost, were there any to be gained? An awakening of reconization, that the Americans are not the only breed in this human race. To not take what we fortunate have for granite. In conclusion to 9-11 better protection against future terrorism has been put into action and the American ignorance was lifted...for a short period of time.

Violent protest, assasination, hate crimes, discrimanation, can all is debated weather or not they serving a good and a bad purpose. Everything bad has a good, as for everything good has badly; it's the way you look at it all.

lejendary

[baleen]

when I was in college we would always pilfer the "creative writing" packets of student works for the week. I hounded my friends in those classes like a fucking junkie for that shit.

what I'm saying is. if you have the goods, get in this thread.

[pantsoclock]

"Contrary to popular belief, bamboo is not a plant, it is a grass."

"It's amazing that the pyramids were built, because no one was alive then."

"Apple computer, psychedelic music, new age philosophies, these were all things that perspired from the 60s."

[Duplo]

"Apple computer, psychedelic music, new age philosophies, these were all things that perspired from the 60s."

still comp's everest, will never be topped, ostensibly

[grammatron]

Here's another good one I saved from a 9th grader's paper:

"[George Washington's] contributions to society was, he made America a free nation, a lot of wonderful achievements took place when he was president, he made America a tough nation and if he didn't win the war against the British we probably wouldn't be speaking English right now."

[grammatron]

Oh here's another from the same girl from my previous post:

"There is the self-esteem problem, expressed by Piggy, the above normal size, glasses, and basically an out cast to the rest of the group, he is in search for acceptance, and during this search he is faced with the obstacle of Jack, the bully, whose main satisfaction comes from degrading Piggy, in order to somehow see himself above and at a higher level."

[cooly]

i can't express how much i love "Everything bad has a good, as for everything good has badly"

[cooly]

have we considered the possibility that grammatron is a terrible teacher and is making his children retarded

[grammatron]

pretty much sums it all up, doesn't it

[Riverchrist]

These are both from the same girl in a 10th grade english class. When talking to her, you'd have no idea she was literally brainless:

9-11, was a horrible tradgedy, tons of lives were lost, did this experience lifted the American sprit? Or down it? These questions are asked. Out of all the lives lost, were there any to be gained? An awakening of reconization, that the Americans are not the only breed in this human race. To not take what we fortunate have for granite. In conclusion to 9-11 better protection against future terrorism has been put into action and the American ignorance was lifted...for a short period of time.

Violent protest, assasination, hate crimes, discrimanation, can all is debated weather or not they serving a good and a bad purpose. Everything bad has a good, as for everything good has badly; it's the way you look at it all.

lejendary

I started hearing the music from Independence Day.

[addison]

reconization sounds cunnilingual

[Uppercrust]

we need more from that girl grammatron. keep them coming.

[DJBJ]

Today the Democratic Republic of Congo is coming out of one of bloodiest conflict since the third World War, with a death toll of four million people.

[gongshow]

Maybe your student is a time traveler.

[delgriffith]

These are both from the same girl in a 10th grade english class. When talking to her, you'd have no idea she was literally brainless:

9-11, was a horrible tradgedy, tons of lives were lost, did this experience lifted the American sprit? Or down it? These questions are asked. Out of all the lives lost, were there any to be gained? An awakening of reconization, that the Americans are not the only breed in this human race. To not take what we fortunate have for granite. In conclusion to 9-11 better protection against future terrorism has been put into action and the American ignorance was lifted...for a short period of time.

Violent protest, assasination, hate crimes, discrimanation, can all is debated weather or not they serving a good and a bad purpose. Everything bad has a good, as for everything good has badly; it's the way you look at it all.

lejendary

I started hearing the music from Independence Day.

[fury]

hahahshshshhahah

[Riverchrist]

Yeah kind of like that. (Wow.)

[Nova]

This is from a paper I had to edit recently

It all started when one day I woke up to go to school and was not feeling good at all. I woke up to a stomach ache; then here comes all the diarrhea. I thought I was just sick with a virus. I get in the shower and then all of this vomit comes out. Chocolate milk and chicken noodles which I had had the night before. After all of this I still managed to go to school.

At 13 weeks I had my first ultrasound. I fell in love seeing this little thing with no eyes, face, arms, or legs move around. It was so beautiful look like a little blob moving around. I fell in love from that day on i knew my life would never be the same. Then the months started to fly past I was getting bigger and bigger. I was ready for him to come out. I started having very sharp pains in my private area on top.

Here comes the doctor and before u knows it my beautiful blessing popped out with one push.

[Nova]

and then here comes all the diarrhea

no big thang

[crooked]

yo nova can i sig that last quote

plz

[Nova]

Why are you asking my permission for this

[crooked]

oh i was gonna do it anyway it was mostly more just a comment on its ridiculousness

[the singularity]

best new thread

[the singularity]

ROTFLMFAO
OMG

[winjer]

A good one from a year back I saved. I teach some esl classes and some high school English classes at an international school... exclusively Chinese students. Got this from one of the girls in the esl class when I asked her for a yearbook blurb:

I am a new student at ---. I like cat. I am a communist. my ideal is red revolution in world. to wipe out class. to wipe out religion. to yield world the only nation, USSR. She is infinity territory. no person to arrive border. She is a genuine communism nation.

[addison]

thank you

[captain]

del is a hero

[Grey Poupon]

the amount of padding in these things is incredible

I have many angry group project memories of editing out all the in fact, due to this, however in this case, ostensibly the results show, therefore the results indicate, however, and therefore.. (ad nauseum)

[addison]

I can't tell you how many fucking short stories I've read that use a variant of the phrase: he/she blinks

As in: Harold opened the door to Judy, who blinked rapidly at him.

God I want to start collecting this shit it's so it's like every other fucking creative writer was raised by Anime characters ^_^;;