how would you describe your neighbor, if they made the news

'Cause I've been postin' and laughin' so long
That even my momma thinks that my mind is gone

Postby coop » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:32 am

"he mostly kept to himself. sometimes I would see him mowing the yard. seemed like a normal guy"
User avatar

coop
 
Posts: 19583
Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2009 12:29 am
Location: San Junipero

Postby Ted Pikul » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:33 am

"loved his snowblower like a son"
loaf angel wrote:I love how Ted makes every thread as a testament to how fucking boring he is.

"I bought a new garden hose mk 2"
User avatar

Ted Pikul
DARE.
 
Posts: 40905
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:01 pm
Location: 41*705312

Postby i am rich » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:34 am

feeds the feral cats in our buildings back yard
User avatar

i am rich
 
Posts: 8885
Joined: Sat Jul 22, 2017 12:01 pm
Location: that's me inside your head

Postby No Good Advice » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:35 am

'Off the rails kind of dude. Unhinged. I was just waiting for a murder'
User avatar

No Good Advice
 
Posts: 9486
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 2:59 pm

Postby Fine Wine » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:37 am

"we are the same person"
User avatar

Fine Wine
 
Posts: 2418
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 2:48 pm

Postby xxx-xxx-xxxx » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:39 am

it's about time they lock him up
WHITESOXXX-XXX-XXXX
User avatar

xxx-xxx-xxxx
 
Posts: 9138
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 6:39 pm
Location: Chicago

Postby Annie May » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:41 am

Clearly he was blasting loud music all the time to drown out the sounds of murder
hamberders & covfefe
User avatar

Annie May
 
Posts: 7123
Joined: Tue Nov 29, 2016 9:14 pm

Postby Eyeball Kid » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:43 am

Likes smoking cigars on his patio. Subscribes to the local paper.
User avatar

Eyeball Kid
 
Posts: 37597
Joined: Sun Apr 04, 2010 1:17 pm

Postby ahalfhourago » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:45 am

Is a real jerk.
User avatar

ahalfhourago
 
Posts: 218
Joined: Mon Mar 29, 2021 5:51 pm
Location: A night out

Postby Itsmecraig » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:51 am

She would hit the lock button on her car key fob to make the horn honk between 60 and 100 times every single afternoon so we knew she had something going on
User avatar

Itsmecraig
 
Posts: 2240
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:59 pm
Location: the people are shit

Postby This Guy » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:51 am

Who?
User avatar

This Guy
 
Posts: 11351
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 7:13 pm
Location: Neutral Good

Postby gug » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:53 am

Friendly and well intentioned
User avatar

gug
Site Admin
 
Posts: 1756
Joined: Thu Sep 26, 2019 3:26 pm

Postby incoherent grunting » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:53 am

actually, my last neighbour was arrested for murder, and you know what - not surprised
"let's get psychic not blacked out. Let's get wild without getting sick. Let's get turnt while staying woke."
User avatar

incoherent grunting
 
Posts: 12027
Joined: Fri Oct 30, 2015 5:21 pm
Location: life's a beach

Postby normal forest » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:54 am

smells strongly of weed, loves to blast trap music at maximum volume during my zoom calls, overall seems like a pretty good dude
User avatar

normal forest
 
Posts: 1199
Joined: Fri Feb 14, 2020 5:22 pm
Location: normal forest

Postby Fine Wine » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:55 am

"i always thought there must be dead bodies over there but he came over once and nope, dude just has really rank farts. cool guy"
User avatar

Fine Wine
 
Posts: 2418
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 2:48 pm

Postby i am rich » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:57 am

Fine Wine wrote:"i always thought there must be dead bodies over there but he came over once and nope, dude just has really rank farts. cool guy"

Fine Wine wrote:"we are the same person"
User avatar

i am rich
 
Posts: 8885
Joined: Sat Jul 22, 2017 12:01 pm
Location: that's me inside your head

Postby clouds » Thu Apr 08, 2021 8:58 am

north: absolute lunatic who has been making cuts with a circular saw in his backyard for the last 18 months approximately 16 hours a day

south: perfect neighbor, waves but never stop & chats, nice smile. i've never seen anyone else at his house in the couple of years he's been there.

west: young bro w/roomate, coaches hs girls soccer, put up a trump flag 2 weeks before election as a reaction to all the houses on our street having biden or anti-trump signs so he lost all good will with me and i've been ignoring him since.

east: seems kind of bored since he retired. nice guy who doesn't say much unless he's had a couple of michelobs or lites then he will come say hi. gives my dog treats through a hole in the fence.
User avatar

clouds
 
Posts: 11250
Joined: Fri Apr 27, 2012 8:25 pm

Postby CudNylon » Thu Apr 08, 2021 9:02 am

Would call them inconsiderate then say “should have seen it coming”/“probably had it coming” depending on what happened.

Most likely another neighbor would be saying “he never spoke to anyone, then suddenly snapped” about me in regards to the first neighbor.
User avatar

CudNylon
 
Posts: 12795
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 6:08 pm
Location: failing this city

Postby v h g » Thu Apr 08, 2021 9:08 am

Shes very friendly but I'm not surprised because her father also did time for bribing public officials
Bought this at the mall I'm gonna wear this at the mall.
User avatar

v h g
 
Posts: 4967
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 6:23 pm

Postby Dead_Wizard » Thu Apr 08, 2021 9:26 am

"He always tucked in his t-shirts, and had an extremely high pitched voice. It was only a matter of time."
User avatar

Dead_Wizard
 
Posts: 8952
Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2012 1:45 pm

Postby brittle » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:06 am

very good, friendly neighbor. he'd help me shovel if i hadn't finished by the time he did.
User avatar

brittle
 
Posts: 21877
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 2:59 pm

Postby bort » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:06 am

he sucks at drums, but has a a pretty sick classic truck
big nipples , big life
User avatar

bort
 
Posts: 1426
Joined: Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:06 pm

Postby Milquetoaster Strudels » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:08 am

Rarely shoveled his front walk, listened to bad dance music in his backyard late at night sometimes
User avatar

Milquetoaster Strudels
 
Posts: 14905
Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2009 8:14 pm
Location: Minneapolis

Postby gauchebag » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:15 am

in 4 years the woman who lives next door to me, i have seen her once and interacted with her only that one time and that was when we thought the building was on fire. did she even knew who i was? she orders a lot of stuff, sometimes gets multiple packages on the same day.
User avatar

gauchebag
 
Posts: 8549
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:10 pm

Postby Milk » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:16 am

I have never seen my floor neighbor. Hasn't been there more than a year i think though. All i've recently learned is he (she?) smokes because since it's spring i've opened my kitchen window sometimes and once in a while my apartment starts smelling like cigs because they go out to smoke behind the apartment.
I must insist on being a pessimist, I'm a loner in a catastrophic mind
User avatar

Milk
 
Posts: 19949
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2015 10:56 am
Location: Shut the fuck up Milk

Postby sobieski » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:18 am

The guy that would take his cat for walks
sm//o/ke le/ss weed
and sleep more
always/ tip %20
User avatar

sobieski
Comptroller
 
Posts: 25780
Joined: Thu Dec 13, 2012 10:13 am
Location: rare turtle

Postby Down n dirty rufus » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:36 am

stomped around CONSTANTLY
User avatar

Down n dirty rufus
 
Posts: 1971
Joined: Wed Jun 19, 2019 11:54 pm

Postby toots » Thu Apr 08, 2021 10:46 am

area man
User avatar

toots
 
Posts: 5487
Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2009 3:21 pm
Location: petroleum, IN


Return to Poster's Paradise

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: A-Ok, Annie May, apostrophe, Autarch, black drum, bobble, brent, Buddy Glass, butanebob, Catullus, chewy, deebster, Double McDouble, evil olive, Executive Producer, Fr. Blanc, Future, galactagogue, gallits, gobot, Google [Bot], gug, guidance, hamilton, hansibansix, hasel, hiddenicon, HotFingersClub, Kevin McCallister, Kiki, Longarm, lordofdiapers, Macgregor, mealy potatoes, Mechanical bird, Merciel, Mister Modular, mudd, murderhorn, mynameisdan, mynamerocks, naturemorte, No Good Advice, npc, Phil, pinkerton, pixel, pretty yeoman, pzadvance, Ralph Vaughan Williams, rankoutsider, Render, Repo, Robert, shizaam, Shotfrog, snow wave, speakers, tea preacher, tgk, v h g, virile, warmjets, wuk, yungboi and 137 guests