Thanksgiving is ruined!

Let's talk hats

Postby Actor Jason P » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:13 pm

Oh God now my godmother and my adopted neighbor are arguing Guatemalan politics things are about to get messy
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Postby Actor Jason P » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:13 pm

Yep, that's me. You might be wondering how I got here ...
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Postby easy » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:15 pm

medical fascism
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Postby auspice » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:16 pm

Another Thanksgiving lost to BLM and CRT, why do we even bother? What's the theme for Christmas gonna be, Gulag Galoshes?
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Postby tgk » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:25 pm

Briefly lost my shit and stormed off when I put out the spread and my kid (who was in a pissy mood because he had to turn his switch off) said he "wasn't hungry". Recovered and now I've got a peanut butter pie in the oven
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Postby easy » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:30 pm

“not hungry” on thanksgiving is such a classic kid move
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Postby Sissy Spacerock » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:31 pm

churrokbyme wrote:I am the punchline of the cosmic thanksgiving joke today.

I had plans to have Thanksgiving with a friend at a nice restaurant today, and then cook today and tomorrow for a Friendsgiving with different friends this weekend.

Woke up to a series of texts from my friend that he had to cancel our thanksgiving plans today because his dad had a stroke last night and he just got out of a redeye flight to see him on the other side of the country.

Feeling horrid about my friend and his dad, I figure I'd just cook through the blues and do some more prep for this weekend's thanksgiving. As I reach for something in the fridge, I knock over a deli container of turkey stock I had made a couple of days ago. The stock falls out of the fridge and cracks open.

As I instinctively jump to the side in a futile attempt to avoid getting the cold turkey stock pouring out of the container on my feet, I feel a sharp sting on the bottom of my foot. Somehow I stepped on an eraser-sized piece of broken glass that hadn't been there the night before -- probably from the light fixture that had just randomly exploded three weeks ago that I had spent an hour carefully vacuuming, sweeping, and mopping to clean up what I thought were all the bits of broken glass.

So I just put my foot back down after looking at it and started self-pity cry-laughing as totally sanitary cold greasy turkey stock flowed into my fresh wound.

Nice! lol.


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Postby Sissy Spacerock » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:32 pm

easy wrote:“not hungry” on thanksgiving is such a classic kid move


i think i liked this one + then refusing to talk or look up but i mostly don't have memories

LA really tells on itself with its emptiness on this day
all the rich little transplant fucks have scattered
my power only grows
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Postby tgk » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:32 pm

easy wrote:“not hungry” on thanksgiving is such a classic kid move


Yup. And then he pulled the other classic move of not liking anything except the rolls
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Postby doublethink0 » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:35 pm

ya I just sat this one out, my niece gave me a cold or something and I'm not feeling it this year

Ohio also had a COVID rebound so who the fuck knows
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Postby auspice » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:35 pm

tgk wrote:Briefly lost my shit and stormed off when I put out the spread and my kid (who was in a pissy mood because he had to turn his switch off) said he "wasn't hungry". Recovered and now I've got a peanut butter pie in the oven


I'm sorry but this is what you get with Biden socialism, hope you're happy.
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Postby Corpsegore » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:43 pm

Glad my mom is continuing the tradition of using every family get together to recount unsolicited tales of family deaths and other all-around tragedies.
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Postby grammatron » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:46 pm

2/3rds of the way through making our pumpkin pie, the 12-year-old suddenly said, “my stomach feels weird,” and then ran to the bathroom and barfed.
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Postby grammatron » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:48 pm

Corpsegore wrote:Was there not a line of people in the same predicament as you?

I wondered about this too. No one else was there asking for a turkey. They did have smoked turkeys that went with the full meals you could order, so maybe people just got those. But, dang if I wanted a ham I would’ve gotten a ham. Fuck a smoked turkey.
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Postby Merciel » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:49 pm

At least your kid made it to the toilet. A couple weeks ago Kermit had some stomach thing so he just barfed all over his bed and then rolled over and went back to sleep in it.

He also apparently staggered to the bathroom at some point in the middle of the night, but instead of puking into the toilet, spewed all over the floor and an otherwise clean hand towel.

Kid's gonna be a hit at his frat house in 15 years, I guess.
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Postby Merciel » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:52 pm

Also it's 3 pm on Thanksgiving Day and I have spent my entire day frantically working on a brief that I'm trying to get finished in the next hour or so, which is not looking terribly likely.

Thanksgiving is ruined.
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Postby grammatron » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:53 pm

Yeah our older two are finally able to get to the bathroom. The youngest still just sits there and barfs all over everything and it’s maddening. Luckily, one upside of Covid is that none of them have gone through it in quite a while, so hopefully the youngest has grown out of that too by now.
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Postby easy » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:54 pm

one time as a kid I puked in my sleep through my nose
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Postby dusky » Thu Nov 25, 2021 2:56 pm

Dead_Wizard wrote:Aunt refusing rapid test and making a huge scene...


step father-in-law did this but that was only the warm up to his thoughts on the murder of Ahmaud Arbery and the McMichael/Bryan verdict. somehow my wife got me back in the house for the night but we're nearing the end of my ability to do these with her family. fucking sucks.
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Postby Actor Jason P » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:02 pm

Merciel wrote:At least your kid made it to the toilet. A couple weeks ago Kermit had some stomach thing so he just barfed all over his bed and then rolled over and went back to sleep in it.


Another kid power move
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Postby This Guy » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:03 pm

Daughter might be allergic to her new kitten, so we gave her a Benadryl and now she is in the deepest sleep and won’t wake up to eat
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Postby auspice » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:07 pm

chaotic Thanksgivings in the Hipinion Extended Universe
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Postby doublethink0 » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:09 pm

This Guy wrote:Daughter might be allergic to her new kitten, so we gave her a Benadryl and now she is in the deepest sleep and won’t wake up to eat


I did this same thing on family Christmas as a kid, my Grandma's dog and cats just hit me hard
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Postby Merciel » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:28 pm

Brief is finished after all. It sucks but it's done!

Time to gear up for actual Thanksgiving. Yeehaw.
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Postby fury » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:54 pm

My long term relationship ended two days ago before we were going to host thanksgiving. I’m now at my own families. Ahahahah fun times ahead for me
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Postby DasLofGang » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:57 pm

easy wrote:one time as a kid I puked in my sleep through my nose

Little Jimmy Hendrix over here
it's the suspense that gets me wrote:wandering around the house grunting "UUHHHHHH PUT IT ON MEEEEEHHHH"
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Postby kid8 » Thu Nov 25, 2021 3:58 pm

Holy shit, Fury! are you ok? wanna go to the casino?
Stop.
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Postby grammatron » Thu Nov 25, 2021 4:06 pm

fury wrote:My long term relationship ended two days ago before we were going to host thanksgiving. I’m now at my own families. Ahahahah fun times ahead for me

Sending big hugs your way, friend.
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Postby mcwop23 » Thu Nov 25, 2021 4:07 pm

yeah fury godspeed
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colin meloy doesn't need to die
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Postby mystery meat » Thu Nov 25, 2021 4:13 pm

Worst fucking holiday
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