HPN Movie Series: DOLL FACE (2021), Wed @ 22 ET

Humans in space suits make monkeys nervous

Postby Jeremy » Sun Sep 19, 2021 8:00 pm

I'm not going to be able to do the movie tonight because I just started a new job and I have to get up at like 6:30am for it but I just want to say that when I started the movie series I was in an extremely bad place in my life and it was one of the few things I had to look forward to. When I abandoned it I was similarly in a really bad place but the fact that it continued and that I was eventually able to return as a participant allowed it to stay one of the few things I had to look forward to. When I moved onto the graveyard shift my schedule pretty much completely prevented me from participating and this is going to sound ridiculous given how much damage that job did to me, but preventing me from continuing to hang out with you all and take in these artifacts was genuinely one of the worst things about it. Ampersand and Dan, you've both done an incredible job with this thing, certainly a much better job than I possibly could have. The regulars are all phenomenally funny and the pace and quality of quips in chat is always astonishing.

Happy 10th anniversary and I hope everyone enjoys The Postman.
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Jeremy
 
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Postby pretty yeoman » Sun Sep 19, 2021 9:02 pm

Jeremy <3
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 19, 2021 11:07 pm

Code: Select all
[21:12] <@Amp> 3
[21:12] <@Amp> 2
[21:12] <@Amp> 1
[21:12] <donnamartin> you did in 1991 but then this movie scared everyone off of it
[21:12] <@Amp> Single Dirty Postman
[21:13] <dan2> end of the world starting with talk radio, so far it checks out
[21:13] <dvr> i always thought this was a paul revere movie
[21:13] <donnamartin> so, i feel like the postman is the definition of someone should have told him no, right?
[21:13] <dvr> guess not!
[21:13] <Bob511> What's so great about them, really?
[21:13] <donnamartin> wait this is a future movie?
[21:13] <laserblast> welcome to THE POSTMAN, a hideo kojima production
[21:13] <Bob511> Salt flats or cities, I suppose.
[21:13] <dvr> haha. yeah donna. i am surprised as well
[21:13] <Trebbers> New Madness
[21:14] <donnamartin> hmmm what's the over under on whether this bests bicentennial man for movie i hate most?
[21:14] <laserblast> "he wasn't scared of the shogun. but the shogun was scared of him"
[21:14] <donnamartin> tom petty????????
[21:14] <dan2> Tom Petty voices the mule
[21:14] <donnamartin> lol
[21:14] <sideshowraheem> if Tom Petty is in your movie he's gotta get the And
[21:14] <besoin> the hell
[21:14] <@Amp> whaaat
[21:14] <dan2> TRY and tell me this movie is bad
[21:14] <donnamartin> the lion dropped his starbucks frappacino
[21:14] <impdentist> how come he looks like pastor dave
[21:15] <@Amp> Pastor Dave has been chasing this high since 1997
[21:15] <bbm> this is a good start already
[21:15] <impdentist> one binoc
[21:15] <donnamartin> i'm already confused
[21:15] <lhs> is the title a pun
[21:15] <besoin> lightning mcqueen's corpse in the background
[21:15] <dan2> we fucked it all up donna
[21:15] <Trebbers> "No, you better drink my piss instead"
[21:16] <bbm> is this waterworld pt 2
[21:16] <donnamartin> honestly at the rate america is headed this might be our future
[21:16] <impdentist> can mules see color
[21:16] <bbm> not kidding
[21:16] <besoin> that's a horse
[21:16] <donnamartin> a+ dialogue already winning
[21:17] <bbm> didn't know kevin costner directed this heaping pile of great movie
[21:17] <donnamartin> i really want the machines to turn on and start murdering
[21:17] <dan2> it's a mule and his name is "Bill the Mule"
[21:17] <donnamartin> that's his christian name
[21:18] <bbm> 3 mins in and im struggling
[21:18] <dan2> is part of your struggle that you're 2 minutes behind?
[21:18] <donnamartin> he didn't check this building very thoroughly
[21:18] <besoin> he accidentally shoots shoeless joe jackson
[21:18] <donnamartin> if someone killed costner right now i'd give this movie an oscar
[21:18] <Trebbers> Like, wouldn't you kill something you could eat
[21:19] <donnamartin> that donkey has seen things, even ogres
[21:19] <bbm> no im up to speed
[21:19] <dan2> maybe I like this movie because it shows my ideal life
[21:19] <@Amp> lol
[21:19] <besoin> is this soarin' over california
[21:20] <dan2> Mule's Rules
[21:20] <dvr> 3 hours of talking to a donkey?
[21:20] <impdentist> he's right
[21:20] <donnamartin> hard to tell who's the bigger ass
[21:20] <Trebbers> What
[21:20] <dvr> it seems he's a jester not a postman
[21:21] <bbm> theres three more hours?
[21:21] <besoin> i just went to doesthedogdie.com to check on bill and i am not happy
[21:21] <donnamartin> oh no
[21:21] <impdentist> how did they find someone who knows this song
[21:21] <dan2> Costner should start doing this production irl
[21:21] <dvr> maybe there's only one song in the future
[21:22] <dan2> take it on tour
[21:22] <@Amp> ::starts rapping and the audience loves it::
[21:22] <besoin> maccostner
[21:23] <dan2> where did all these slightly squared caps come from
[21:23] <bbm> bite my shorts man
[21:23] <Trebbers> "Bite me" survives
[21:23] <@Amp> nobody appreciates craft in the apocalypse. smh.
[21:23] <impdentist> wait is this just mad max 2
[21:24] <kayke> it doesn't seem like these people have a lot of mail to send
[21:24] <besoin> is this going to be seven samurai
[21:24] <dan2> they're getting to it
[21:24] <dan2> in about 45 minutes
[21:24] <dvr> instead of a sweet trans am it's a donkey though
[21:24] <besoin> the dastardly will patton
[21:24] <dan2> oh I'll warn you all now, the last hour does drag a bit
[21:24] <bbm> truly a movie that has existed
[21:25] <besoin> why wouldn't they still have books?
[21:25] <dan2> replaced by tablets
[21:26] <besoin> costner is safe
[21:27] <donnamartin> costner you suck at getting away
[21:28] <dan2> got him with the breadstick
[21:28] <bbm> heres the thing if you rated this movie above 0 stars then
[21:28] <donnamartin> they're still endless, even in the apocolypse
[21:28] <Trebbers> Did they say what they're mining?
[21:29] <donnamartin> breadsticks
[21:29] <donnamartin> i really lack the executive function to be a warlord
[21:29] <dan2> give em hell, Bill
[21:31] <kayke> proud boys
[21:31] <Trebbers> This is where they buried all the horses at the end of the shoot
[21:32] <impdentist> oh come on everyone knows that one!
[21:32] <dan2> the next 160 minutes are just them going back and forth
[21:33] <@Amp> "My kingdom... for a horse"
[21:33] <impdentist> "you know at least two shakespeare quotes"
[21:33] <donnamartin> i hope he pulls out a bartlett's
[21:34] <donnamartin> is this just a movie about costner becoming an MMA fighter?
[21:37] <kayke> yum
[21:37] <Trebbers> oh noooooo
[21:37] <donnamartin> the FUCK
[21:37] <dan2> this is how they sealed their fate
[21:37] <donnamartin> he's gonna go john wick on his ass
[21:38] <dan2> why did the bread look so normal compared to the gruel?
[21:38] <dvr> local
[21:38] <kayke> getting mule gruel all over his fingerless gloves
[21:38] <Trebbers> Maybe we all should start adding gruel to our diet now to get used to it
[21:39] <Bob511> 110th Shitflixe Anniversary
[21:39] <sideshowraheem> the post-apocalypse movie series
[21:39] <dan2> lmao
[21:39] <Trebbers> ah
[21:39] <impdentist> they spent the whole budget on getting the rights to other movies
[21:39] <kayke> they wanna watch minions
[21:39] <Bob511> "Oh damn it, we have to watch a three-hour movie now."
[21:39] <@Amp> lmao
[21:39] <Trebbers> ahha
[21:39] <dan2> when they misbehave he puts on Patch Adams
[21:39] <donnamartin> lol
[21:40] <Trebbers> "If you boys are good, we will watch Porky's tonight"
[21:41] <impdentist> these are pretty ambiguous laws
[21:41] <dan2> what if they all challenge at once?
[21:42] <Trebbers> Yeah, and I'd want to be taking notes, too
[21:42] <@Amp> feed him to the sarlaac
[21:42] <impdentist> who is he talking to
[21:43] <@Amp> Fallout 4, really
[21:43] <donnamartin> oh okay cool
[21:43] <donnamartin> that seemed completely necessary
[21:43] <dan2> hey I'm beginning to think these guys aren't all that good...
[21:43] <Trebbers> Had to slip that in there
[21:44] <laserblast> we're 30 minutes in and we are in the second sentence of the plot summary on wikipedia
[21:44] <Trebbers> hah
[21:44] <kayke> lol
[21:44] <dan2> we're not even close to any postmanning
[21:44] <impdentist> the petit bourgeois
[21:44] <Trebbers> Do they show him fill out the application?
[21:44] <impdentist> trump shit
[21:44] <sideshowraheem> I do love that Costner's conclusions from the Waterworld fiasco were this needs to be longer, drier and directed by me
[21:45] <donnamartin> now i'm the leader of 8chan. have you heard of it?
[21:45] <dan2> lol
[21:45] <donnamartin> i mean they brand themselves with an 8
[21:45] <dan2> if everyone after the apocalypse is dumb you might as well just attribute that quote to yourself
[21:47] <dan2> honestly this would be a dope way to watch a movie
[21:47] <impdentist> they should definitely have quarry showings yeah
[21:47] <impdentist> let's do our 20th anniversary in a quarry
[21:48] <dvr> heh
[21:48] <donnamartin> i watched frankenstein in a cemetery. can recommend
[21:48] == lhs [webchat@cloak-t2e0ov6k.hsd1.wa.comcast.net] has quit [Quit: Page closed]
[21:49] <dan2> this movie will basically be our own version of the 20 mile run
[21:49] <impdentist> should have gotten rob schneider for that role
[21:49] <donnamartin> are we all giovanni?
[21:49] <Bob511> Ribisi seems like he'd get that a lot.
[21:49] <donnamartin> lol dentist
[21:49] <kayke> never seen breaking bad, but that's what I think the kid from breaking bad is like
[21:50] <dan2> you're right on
[21:50] <dvr> whats happening? hes looking for someone?
[21:50] <dan2> he's about to get himself some lion steak
[21:50] <dvr> oh
[21:50] <impdentist> just like these guys, jesse is always yelling about "mr. white"
[21:51] <dvr> pappilion coconut raft
[21:51] <Trebbers> What
[21:52] <impdentist> they're really just gonna throw all this ammo away
[21:52] <dan2> I feel like it's safe to assume they have a lot of ammo
[21:52] <dan2> probably more ammo than food
[21:52] <donnamartin> i'm not gunsmith but they seem bad at this
[21:53] <impdentist> the cool thing about ammo though is that you can turn it into food
[21:53] <donnamartin> this is how i always felt in oregon trail when hunting squirrels
[21:53] <impdentist> i learned that on the oregon trail
[21:53] <impdentist> oh, yeah
[21:54] <donnamartin> costner looking like the old dude in home alone
[21:54] <dvr> haha
[21:54] <@Amp> farewell, sweet prince
[21:54] <donnamartin> huh. thought ribisi would have lasted longer
[21:54] <dan2> RIPisi
[21:54] <donnamartin> lol
[21:55] <dvr> i think this is how i'd knife fight too
[21:55] <Trebbers> ahahha
[21:55] <donnamartin> oh
[21:56] <donnamartin> just killing the big names early
[21:56] <impdentist> oh!
[21:56] <@Amp> well then!!!!
[21:56] <Trebbers> Chekov's Lion
[21:56] <donnamartin> lol
[21:56] <laserblast> he was certainly lion in wait
[21:56] <Trebbers> Master filmmaking
[21:56] <@Amp> best meal he's had in years
[21:57] <donnamartin> it's a testament to this movie that i see a lion and i'm like 'eh, sure why not"
[21:57] <Bob511> I was in the kitchen, is the lion the leader now?
[21:57] <dan2> haha
[21:57] <Trebbers> what the shit
[21:57] <impdentist> oooohhhh
[21:58] <impdentist> origin story
[21:58] <dan2> see, it only took 45 minutes
[21:58] <dvr> thats how long it takes it fill out an application on the usps site
[21:58] <donnamartin> oh i hope a trex shows up now
[21:58] <impdentist> oh what up
[21:58] <dan2> Velociraptor spits gruel in his face
[21:58] <dvr> he didnt seem cold til he got in the car?
[21:59] <donnamartin> if this were a lifetime movie, it would be called "stalked by my lion" and it would be wrapping up in 10 min
[21:59] <@Amp> lol
[21:59] <Bob511> The USPS: Neither snow nor rain nor
[21:59] <Bob511> Rain:
[21:59] <kayke> life of pi
[21:59] <dvr> brandon fraiser
[21:59] <@Amp> early man discovers fire
[21:59] <donnamartin> Vancino Man
[21:59] <impdentist> after all this hes gonna die of carbon monoxide poisoning by starting a fire in the truck
[22:00] <dan2> again, this seems like a solid way to spend my life right now
[22:00] <impdentist> what's he eating
[22:00] <Bob511> Or he's going to poison himself incinerating issues of Vogue and Cosmo full of perfume samples
[22:00] <donnamartin> is this seriously the plot?
[22:00] <kayke> so he's just starting post secrets
[22:01] <impdentist> agh
[22:01] <kayke> eat it
[22:01] <kayke> eat timmy's tooth
[22:01] <Bob511> Wait, is he measuring his own missing teeth holes?
[22:01] <donnamartin> he just glues it in to replce his old one
[22:01] <dan2> You found :child's tooth: [1/99]
[22:01] <donnamartin> lol
[22:02] <impdentist> dude he's gonna be rich now
[22:02] <kayke> he's stealing valor
[22:02] <donnamartin> no 90s movie was safe from a playboy
[22:02] <impdentist> the dogs still hate them
[22:03] <dvr> "i found porn in the woods!"
[22:03] <donnamartin> he looks like he's about to open a bar specializing in high gravity beers and steampunk
[22:03] <impdentist> oh!
[22:04] <impdentist> is that mr. k_uger
[22:04] <dvr> haha yeah
[22:04] <dan2> he just speaks authority
[22:04] <dvr> (i think)
[22:04] <donnamartin> porn in the woods is one of those things in life that will never not confound me
[22:04] <sideshowraheem> every tribe in this universe is led by a bald character actor
[22:05] <donnamartin> how is kevin costner still alive
[22:05] <dan2> man, Kruger was born to play Gerald Ford
[22:05] <@Amp> "i knew my boy would write home"
[22:05] <dan2> someone needs to make that happen, the technology is there
[22:05] <impdentist> norma!
[22:06] <kayke> she needs her wayfair coupons
[22:06] <donnamartin> someone wrote this plot and said yup, this is it
[22:06] <@Amp> lol
[22:06] <@Amp> "all them damn lions"
[22:07] <dan2> I'm welling up
[22:07] == pretty_postman [webchat@cloak-pr5uzhhe.bendor.broadband.dynamic.tds.net] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:07] <kayke> this feels like it could be a santa claus origin
[22:07] <dan2> you gotta fake it till you make it should have been the tagline
[22:07] <donnamartin> oh yeoman you have missed only 1/3 of the movie
[22:07] <@Amp> technically stealing postman valor
[22:07] <dan2> you cutup
[22:07] <dan2> do you need time yeoman
[22:08] <impdentist> this is exactly what a real postman would do in the bath
[22:08] <dvr> yes
[22:08] <donnamartin> you know, there isn't an ounce of fat on this movie
[22:08] <pretty_postman> do need time, thx dan
[22:08] <@Amp> "we all loved that useless letter you delivered, sir"
[22:08] <sideshowraheem> he just became a postman 5 minutes ago
[22:08] <dvr> 56 15
[22:08] <Trebbers> 56:15
[22:08] <@Amp> lol donna
[22:09] <Trebbers> 5630
[22:09] <pretty_postman> I'll take 57
[22:09] <Trebbers> 57:00
[22:09] <Trebbers> wait
[22:09] <impdentist> "so do you have a name or are you trying to do that whole nameless protagonist things"
[22:09] <Trebbers> 57:00
[22:09] <dan2> 57
[22:09] <donnamartin> i'm confounded by this plot
[22:09] <pretty_postman> much obliged y'all
[22:09] <impdentist> "barack hussein obama"
[22:09] <dan2> he's got my vote
[22:10] <pretty_postman> didn't realize we started early
[22:10] <pretty_postman> then I just looked at the runtime
[22:10] <@Amp> things went downhill in America after Costner cast his Swing Vote
[22:10] <pretty_postman> *lightbulb*
[22:10] <kayke> what about spuds mckenzie, is he still drinking beers?
[22:10] <Trebbers> ha amp
[22:10] <dan2> lol amp
[22:11] <impdentist> lol amp
[22:11] <donnamartin> well, yeoman, you missed a lion attack
[22:11] <pretty_postman> omg they're hooting
[22:11] <impdentist> isn't this the plot to that jerry lewis holocaust movie
[22:11] <donnamartin> but uh, not this i guess
[22:11] <dan2> postman-racial america
[22:11] <donnamartin> is this a flash mob?
[22:11] <pretty_postman> lol dan
[22:11] <@Amp> this is my favorite Shakespeare song
[22:11] <donnamartin> lol dan
[22:12] <kayke> post apocalyptic sesame street, tragically all the muppets died
[22:12] <donnamartin> i guess dad jokes survived the war
[22:12] <pretty_postman> "I love iron + wine"
[22:12] <dan2> heh
[22:12] <pretty_postman> guess ya gotta ask in person after all the dating Apps crashed
[22:13] <donnamartin> how do you feel about long walks on the beach?
[22:13] <pretty_postman> (the beach is in Raleig-Durham)
[22:13] <@Amp> okay i heard "goat semen"
[22:13] == autarch [webchat@cloak-b1ntmd72.hsd1.il.comcast.net] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:13] <autarch> WAITTT
[22:13] <dan2> he has that too, someone was sending a package
[22:13] <autarch> DON"T START THE MOVEIE
[22:13] <pretty_postman> yes, dan
[22:14] <pretty_postman> autarch you made the same mistake I did
[22:14] <dan2> lol autarch, that's a good joke
[22:14] <autarch> did i make it in time?
[22:14] <donnamartin> oh so this is a hotwife sitch?
[22:14] <autarch> T?????
[22:14] <kayke> he had mumps! give us cum!
[22:14] <impdentist> was getting a beer, what did i miss
[22:14] <dan2> 1:01:50
[22:14] <dan2> you're missing all the cum talk
[22:14] <dvr> lol
[22:14] <dan2> this guy had mumps so his cum sucks
[22:14] <donnamartin> they're asking costner to be a cuck
[22:14] <@Amp> "fuck my wife, please"
[22:14] <pretty_postman> surely there will be more cum talk
[22:14] <autarch> wait what
[22:14] <impdentist> i'm just kidding, i still had my headphones in
[22:15] <kayke> "it's the mumps"
[22:15] <pretty_postman> autarch when this is all over we're gonna watch the first hour
[22:15] <donnamartin> my mom wants to fuck you
[22:15] <dan2> autarch, we started an hour early
[22:15] <@Amp> "she'd like to give you the good mumps"
[22:15] <pretty_postman> lion attack, cum talk
[22:15] <@Amp> fuck you kat=yke
[22:15] <autarch> ok yeoman i'm down
[22:15] <kayke> : P
[22:15] <autarch> gimme 1:03:00
[22:15] <autarch> gimme 1:03:00
[22:15] <@Amp> now
[22:15] <dvr> this is like kramer sitting in the office eating crackers
[22:15] <dan2> 1:03:00 now
[22:15] <pretty_postman> 103 just hit
[22:15] <autarch> oh nice
[22:15] <dan2> lol dvr
[22:15] <autarch> love when the t hits
[22:15] <autarch> yo is that costner?
[22:15] <kayke> he should change his name to E
[22:16] <autarch> that's gotta be costner
[22:16] <kayke> mr. e mail
[22:16] <@Amp> i gotta say, this first hour went down pretty easy.
[22:16] <pretty_postman> KAYKE,
[22:16] <impdentist> autarch we all thought that was your neighbor
[22:16] <dan2> 2nd hour is the best of the 3 hours
[22:16] <autarch> that's the most hoo staircase
[22:16] <donnamartin> watching him run is awkward
[22:16] <Bob511> Imagine how soft that serve must be by now.
[22:16] <autarch> i don't even think my neighbor was born in 1997
[22:16] <dan2> oh yeah, latecomers, make sure to check page 400 of the thread for 2 new Sounds of the Movie Series
[22:17] <dan2> the mail mausoleum
[22:17] <pretty_postman> also maybe y'all saw it or maybe not yet but jeremy posted a lovely thing for everybody at the top of p401
[22:17] <dan2> while Jeremy was pouring his heart out, we were watching Costner eat mule porridge
[22:18] <pretty_postman> that is the way
[22:18] <@Amp> lol dan
[22:18] <donnamartin> oooof, same kid
[22:19] <kayke> nor lion
[22:19] <pretty_postman> no please no patriotic snare drums
[22:19] <autarch> damn those gloves are sick
[22:19] <autarch> he really looks like David AR White here
[22:19] <@Amp> "okay, now let's talk about postal banking"
[22:19] <dan2> he's up against the AR-15 Whites
[22:19] <pretty_postman> "here, take this goat cum"
[22:19] <impdentist> p good dan
[22:19] <autarch> what year is it supposed to be
[22:20] <impdentist> did they just deadname him
[22:20] <dan2> 2013
[22:20] <pretty_postman> checks out, I was on a boat so I missed all this
[22:20] <kayke> who is to say a drifter who found a bag of mail isn't a post man?
[22:20] <autarch> Please, Mr. Postman
[22:21] <autarch> wtf is the sherriff gonna do?
[22:21] <dan2> I'm gonna raid a lost and found and live out my fantasy of being The Postman
[22:21] <@Amp> this is like saying Tim Allen can't be Santa Claus
[22:21] <pretty_postman> lol
[22:22] == besoin [webchat@cloak-8p3np9mv.hsd1.ma.comcast.net] has quit [Ping timeout]
[22:22] <autarch> she just walks around like that?
[22:22] <pretty_postman> it's the future
[22:23] <impdentist> he's got a letter for her all right
[22:23] <donnamartin> no, he really isn't
[22:23] <impdentist> guess what letter it is
[22:23] <pretty_postman> lol
[22:23] <kayke> no one is funny, but everyone is horny
[22:23] <dan2> Costner is about to deliver a package
[22:23] <impdentist> guess what letter
[22:23] <donnamartin> neither rain, nor snow, nor other husbands
[22:23] <impdentist> it's D
[22:23] <dan2> unfortunately for her it's gonna be an express delivery
[22:23] <autarch> my god
[22:23] <donnamartin> how is this the plot
[22:23] <Bob511> Fortunately the mail service has been resurrected just in time for this Penthouse letter
[22:24] <dan2> lmao
[22:24] <pretty_postman> lol bob
[22:24] <laserblast> lmao
[22:24] <donnamartin> "sure" is what I want to hear from a dude i'm naked for
[22:24] <@Amp> sadly, not much of a Postcoitalman
[22:24] <impdentist> when do you think was the last time this guy fucked
[22:24] <donnamartin> lol
[22:24] <dan2> heh
[22:24] <pretty_postman> lolol
[22:25] <dan2> she's not gonna be happy when she finds out he only had one toothbrush between him and the mule
[22:25] <Bob511> Heh
[22:25] <dvr> lol
[22:25] <autarch> will this be the laast time he fucks is the better question
[22:25] <@Amp> never even took his shirt off
[22:25] <autarch> would you?
[22:25] <Bob511> Trying so hard not to make a The Postman Always... jok
[22:25] <Bob511> Er, joke.
[22:25] <donnamartin> is he asleep?
[22:25] <impdentist> AH
[22:26] <@Amp> depends on if my mumps were flaring up
[22:26] <pretty_postman> did he-
[22:26] <dan2> the Los Angeles Philharmonic presents Fucking Theme from The Postman
[22:26] <pretty_postman> ahee
[22:26] <donnamartin> love it when a dude falls asleep
[22:26] <dvr> haha dan
[22:26] <autarch> was the first hour good?
[22:26] <pretty_postman> donna called it, "sure" was a red flag
[22:26] <kayke> she left behind her lanyard
[22:26] <@Amp> it got good right before you showed up, autarch
[22:27] <dan2> she only loved me for my mumpless seed :(
[22:27] <donnamartin> they all just slow clap for the fucking
[22:27] <kayke> the mayor is so pissed
[22:27] <pretty_postman> Mayor P.O. Ed
[22:27] <dan2> Mayor Kruger's entire outfit seems to be made of potholders
[22:27] <kayke> "wherever the mail takes me
[22:27] <pretty_postman> lol kayke
[22:28] <kayke> grains are BACK BABY
[22:28] <pretty_postman> did the birds go on strike
[22:28] <impdentist> oh geez
[22:28] <Trebbers> oh fuck
[22:28] <donnamartin> corn futures are going wild, time to invest
[22:28] <donnamartin> oh ffs
[22:28] <autarch> can I guess the plot? Is he trying to bring stability to the world by carrying the mail?
[22:28] <donnamartin> kill the kid
[22:28] <laserblast> yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
[22:28] <dan2> *salute*
[22:28] <autarch> kneel for this song
[22:28] <kayke> he's like pretending to be a mailman so he can eat soup
[22:29] <dan2> the plot is basically only starting right now
[22:29] <@Amp> America's Greatest Faker
[22:29] <impdentist> lol
[22:29] <Trebbers> Just yell, 'sike' and ride like hell
[22:29] <autarch> wait, kayke, really?
[22:29] <kayke> yeah
[22:29] <donnamartin> entire movies have been done in this build up
[22:29] <kayke> he found the mail hat on a skeleton
[22:29] <autarch> and he's just ripping these fuckers off?
[22:29] <autarch> that rules
[22:29] <pretty_postman> The Ghostman
[22:30] <dan2> he found the mail in a van with a skeleton in it
[22:30] <@Amp> "i'm looking at a wife that fucked another man for me :)"
[22:30] <donnamartin> they don't even know if she's pregnant
[22:30] <autarch> this is a fucking 3 hour film?
[22:30] <@Amp> lmao autarch
[22:30] <Trebbers> Wait that's why they fucked?
[22:30] <donnamartin> who wants to make a baby in this bullshit?
[22:30] <pretty_postman> well tbf the fucking was over by 1:15:00
[22:30] <donnamartin> lol treb
[22:30] <Trebbers> I got a snack and missed it
[22:31] <Trebbers> There'd be kids everywhere
[22:31] <donnamartin> yeah her husband had mumps so can't knock her up
[22:31] <kayke> the bad mumps
[22:31] <dan2> this is what happens when we don't stand for the flag
[22:32] <dan2> Ash?
[22:32] <donnamartin> i don't recall that postman have to die for their job
[22:32] <autarch> hell yeah
[22:32] <pretty_postman> give it a year or two
[22:32] <impdentist> they kept up the grounds pretty nicely
[22:32] <pretty_postman> lol Washington St
[22:32] <kayke> "now dab"
[22:32] <pretty_postman> good toss for a cuck
[22:32] <autarch> a real postman would STAMP that fire out
[22:32] <impdentist> it's a brick building isnt it
[22:33] <Trebbers> Why would you be burning down your good buildings
[22:33] <impdentist> oh well done autarch
[22:33] <pretty_postman> autarch / kayke lol
[22:33] <dan2> "GodDAMMIT I hate mail"
[22:33] <dan2> we have our 10th aniversary goat
[22:33] <kayke> let him tell the strange goat story
[22:33] <Trebbers> Hope we hear the whole story
[22:33] <@Amp> <GOAT3
[22:33] <impdentist> hahaha
[22:34] <autarch> is that paul?
[22:34] <kayke> the movie is 3 hours, we could hear about the goat
[22:34] <kayke> we have time
[22:34] <autarch> no, it's not paul
[22:34] <autarch> thought it was paul giamatti for a minute
[22:34] <dan2> "Why you eyein' my lemon drink?"
[22:34] <pretty_postman> fond of 'is lemonade
[22:34] <donnamartin> sir i think you just got that from Braveheart
[22:34] <@Amp> double cuck... he won't stand for that
[22:35] <pretty_postman> cuck me once
[22:35] <impdentist> feel like those requests are of somewhat different magnitudes
[22:35] <kayke> if you're hot, just stay inside when evil people are around
[22:36] <@Amp> "goddamn this piss tastes good"
[22:36] <impdentist> "he had the mumps real bad!!"
[22:36] <autarch> dude how did you not see it coming
[22:36] <autarch> why is the guy with the gun running away?
[22:36] <autarch> he has a huge fucking gun
[22:36] <Trebbers> It was like he had never seen a sword before
[22:37] <impdentist> n word incoming
[22:38] <kayke> watch children
[22:38] <@Amp> Will Patton is absolutely terrified of the USA
[22:39] <autarch> how did society get to this point?
[22:39] <dan2> Kruger and Johnny would be some good sitcom fodder
[22:39] <@Amp> well, it seems that the roaming lions were partly responsible
[22:39] <autarch> holy shit that is mr. kruger
[22:39] <dan2> they never really say, I think Costner mentioned something about hot snow or something
[22:40] <dan2> NEW YORK CITY?!
[22:40] <impdentist> yeah there was a lot of unspecified stuff
[22:40] <autarch> andrew floyd webber
[22:40] <Bob511> Sounds like there was every apocalypse at once?
[22:40] <kayke> Hamilton, lion king, beetlejuice... they're all back baby
[22:40] <Trebbers> So a plague, some shit with the rain, wars
[22:41] <impdentist> great timing
[22:41] <donnamartin>  i hope they moon them
[22:41] <autarch> thats such a "directed by costner" moment
[22:41] <autarch> "drop dead and go to hell!" I mean
[22:41] <kayke> "hannibal had cooties"
[22:41] <dan2> wait, he's talking like Hopkins when he says Hannibal
[22:41] <dan2> is that intenional
[22:42] <@Amp> "Hannibal: canceled after Season 3"
[22:42] <Trebbers> ah
[22:42] <Trebbers> The beginning of the apocalypse
[22:42] <pretty_postman> timeline p. much checks out
[22:42] <impdentist> "uh... this isn't, uh... federal jurisdiction, not in the, uh, constitution and so forth"
[22:43] <Trebbers> Awkward
[22:43] <impdentist> he should be talking in a funny voice
[22:43] <dvr> haha
[22:43] <pretty_postman> maybe those glasses w/ the moustache and the nose
[22:43] <donnamartin> they saw each other like, a month ago?
[22:43] <kayke> he sees a lot of people
[22:43] <impdentist> oh well they couldn't make another one
[22:43] <dan2> stateshhhhhh
[22:43] <pretty_postman> lol
[22:44] <Trebbers> ahahhah
[22:44] <autarch> ahahahah
[22:44] <Bob511> Well, bad news about the Metrodome
[22:44] <autarch> "oh yeah? Well then where the HELL do the vikings and twins play now?!"
[22:44] <Trebbers> Riots
[22:44] <dan2> Costner isn't afraid because his neck is protected by 6 inches of sweater
[22:45] <pretty_postman> lucky swat
[22:45] <autarch> no, YOU are hereby assassinated
[22:46] <pretty_postman> c'mon get him now and the movie'll be over lickety split!
[22:46] <Trebbers> Bulletproof barrels
[22:46] <dan2> whatever it takes to protect Costner's semen
[22:46] <donnamartin> costner got horny again
[22:46] <autarch> she's using aimbots
[22:46] <autarch> stop spamming the sniper rifle
[22:46] <donnamartin> well, fuck the rest of this town
[22:46] <impdentist> kinda thought he was gonna try to save the town
[22:46] <kayke> imagine jumping on a moving horse
[22:46] <dvr> he must have a strong right arm..........
[22:47] <pretty_postman> victorious movie despite the town getting smashed up
[22:47] <pretty_postman> victorious music, that is
[22:47] <autarch> ah yeas, an open field, no better place to avoid gunfire
[22:47] <kayke> now she's the postman
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[22:47] <impdentist> yeah it's the same as the santa clause
[22:47] <pretty_postman> heh
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[22:47] <donnamartin> costner dies, abby becomes postman
[22:48] <pretty_postman> , dinosaur eats man, women inherit the earth
[22:48] <dan2> lmao
[22:48] <impdentist> wow really
[22:48] <Trebbers> Cosner still had a gun
[22:48] <donnamartin> lol yeoman
[22:48] <autarch> did he just tickle him?
[22:48] <dvr> heh autarch yeah
[22:48] <dan2> pine branch to the balls is more effective than the gun
[22:48] <dan2> that's how he's gonna defeat Holn
[22:49] <donnamartin> bumpy terrain seems good for a bullet wound
[22:49] <pretty_postman> idea: a party where everyone dresses up as ex civil war soldiers, Postman, pro golfers, etc.
[22:49] <pretty_postman> ... Costplay
[22:49] <donnamartin> lol
[22:49] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:49] <dan2> 80 minute long training sequence of him whipping pine branches at mannequin balls
[22:49] <kayke> this is like the end of the giver, it's up to interpretation if they're dead
[22:50] <Trebbers> fuck you, dude
[22:50] <impdentist> what the hell is wrong with you!
[22:50] <donnamartin> jesus dude she saved yoru ass
[22:50] <donnamartin> fucking men
[22:50] <impdentist> "so you're single??"
[22:51] <kayke> "because his cum was bad?
[22:51] <dan2> the town died, but his dad jokes didn't
[22:51] <Trebbers> "Well, I'm not FULLY erect"
[22:51] <impdentist> just tell her the truth
[22:51] <donnamartin> spoon treaty
[22:52] <donnamartin> it's insane to me that costner took a michael cera vibe to this character
[22:52] <impdentist> "lazy? i'm a federal employee!"
[22:52] <donnamartin> she's so mad he knocked her pu
[22:52] <Trebbers> oh no
[22:52] <autarch> noooo
[22:52] <donnamartin> nooooooo
[22:53] <Trebbers> Would never talk back after that
[22:53] <sideshowraheem> RIP Bill 2
[22:53] <autarch> and that's how the "pony express" became just "the express"
[22:53] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:53] <dvr> lol autarch
[22:53] <dan2> lol aut
[22:54] <dan2> you've got fruit by the foot right there, why not eat that
[22:54] <donnamartin> just get up and eat you lazy fuck
[22:54] <Trebbers> what are you doing
[22:54] <Trebbers> why
[22:54] <dan2> at the time it seemed like a great idea
[22:54] <impdentist> oh would you look at that
[22:54] <autarch> save her you stupid fuck head
[22:55] <donnamartin> "nevermind i'll drown"
[22:55] <dvr> heh
[22:55] <Trebbers> Time to freeze to death
[22:55] <impdentist> i like how the music is playing this like it's some major triumph on costner's part and not just him having beena huge baby       
[22:55] <autarch> trading places
[22:55] <dan2> that's ALL the soup they managed to get out of that entire horse??
[22:56] <autarch> it was a very dehydrated horse, dan
[22:56] <dan2> "Did you not watch Hidden Figures?"
[22:56] <@Amp> "the rest of you, though, WOOF"
[22:56] <donnamartin> abby is a great shot but a crappy cook
[22:57] <dan2> mumps dick
[22:57] <donnamartin> mumpsford and son
[22:57] <dan2> lol
[22:57] <pretty_postman> heh
[22:58] <impdentist> so are they still doing the mail thing
[22:58] <impdentist> or do they have another deal now
[22:58] <Bob511> Thought that was going to pull back as the side of a building.
[22:58] <donnamartin> no they got stopped by snow
[22:58] <autarch> "28! Abby! I held my breath for 28 seconds!!! ABBY!!!!"
[22:58] <dan2> some real guts to just outright call the villain a limp dick, not even do that as an insult from the hero
[22:59] <autarch> why'd you have to burn it?
[22:59] <autarch> jesus
[22:59] <donnamartin> abby has some real crazy eyes energy
[22:59] <dan2> the deserted cabin that nobody could find seemed sort of safe
[22:59] <impdentist> manic postman dream girl
[22:59] <dan2> haha
[23:00] <donnamartin> lol
[23:00] <@Amp> lol
[23:00] <autarch> he's wrong. Joss Whedon is out there
[23:00] <dvr> that would be weird to run into someone
[23:01] <dan2> fistpump moment
[23:01] <autarch> yeah
[23:01] <dvr> oh he's so gonna have sex again
[23:01] <autarch> RINGO IS PRESIDENT?!
[23:01] <dan2> in the 6 months he's been gone clothing somehow got even more patchwork
[23:01] <autarch> best universe
[23:02] <Trebbers> "Also, remember to tip your Postman at Christmas"
[23:02] <dan2> "And we're renaming the Rose Garden to the Octopuses Garden"
[23:02] <autarch> "Pube Shaving?"
[23:03] <Trebbers> I don't understand how time passes here
[23:03] <donnamartin> wait how many people from remember the titans are in this?
[23:03] <autarch> oh lol dan
[23:03] <impdentist> this guy must be worried that the jig is up
[23:04] <autarch> he's pulling a "Catch Me If You Can"
[23:05] <impdentist> all of them have built their own individual fan fictions about the us government based on what the last guy told them
[23:05] <dvr> all those postal workers in one place doesnt seem like a very efficient network
[23:05] <@Amp> "to be or not to be..."
[23:05] <dan2> "it me"
[23:05] <autarch> ::)
[23:05] <autarch> :)
[23:05] <autarch> this is so waterworld
[23:05] <donnamartin> the goonies set up a mailroom?
[23:05] <dan2> to further the Santa Clause comparisons, this is exactly how the elves are portrayed
[23:05] <dvr> oh a zine
[23:06] <impdentist> i have to say this is definitely better than waterworld
[23:06] <donnamartin> i really, truly cannot get over the fact that this is the plot
[23:06] <autarch> yeah no shit
[23:06] <impdentist> "do you remember the beatles"
[23:06] <autarch> lol
[23:07] <autarch> nam
[23:07] <dan2> "Zebra Stripe Gum"
[23:07] <kayke> lol
[23:07] <dvr> ?
[23:07] <autarch> that's the best you can do, kev?
[23:08] <donnamartin> gif
[23:08] <impdentist> just say "at ease"
[23:09] <dan2> yesss
[23:09] <Trebbers> why
[23:09] <donnamartin> no you were not a kid then
[23:09] <dvr> bangorang!
[23:09] <kayke> teaching them to be cool
[23:09] <donnamartin> has kevin costner ever not een grumpy?
[23:09] <donnamartin> not been*
[23:09] <autarch> the Jabroni express
[23:10] <dan2> heh
[23:10] <kayke> those hat brims would probably be useful against the sun, though
[23:10] <dan2> all of these letters just say variations of "Life still sucks here"
[23:10] <dvr> heh
[23:10] <dan2> this is like a Coke commercial
[23:11] <autarch> yeah
[23:11] <kayke> did he see the child and initially choose to ignore him?
[23:11] <kayke> I don't understand what's happening
[23:11] <kayke> just get the fucking mail
[23:11] <dan2> while you're passing through maybe teach the people about mailboxes, Kevin
[23:11] <donnamartin> they're gonna high five and freeze frame
[23:11] <autarch> not so fast, jesus
[23:11] <impdentist> probably don't have to do it at full speed
[23:11] <dvr> well this scene is stupid
[23:11] <dan2> I'm cheering
[23:11] <donnamartin> wait what? just trot
[23:11] <Trebbers> GOT IT
[23:11] <autarch> this papercut is gonna hurt
[23:11] <impdentist> now he just has to turn around anyway
[23:11] <dan2> lol
[23:11] <donnamartin> you bent the letter
[23:12] <dan2> that horse must be so pissed
[23:12] <dan2> this is my favorite part of the movie
[23:12] <donnamartin> i hope there's a waterslide out of it
[23:13] <kayke> lmao
[23:13] <kayke> here we go
[23:13] <autarch> The Hootman
[23:13] <dan2> god yes
[23:13] <dvr> Happy Twn USA
[23:13] <donnamartin> what on earth
[23:13] <autarch> this rules
[23:13] <@Amp> Guardians of the Pony Express
[23:14] <autarch> this is a really good performance
[23:14] <kayke> yeah honestly I'd have fun at this party
[23:14] <donnamartin> he wrote the letter himself
[23:14] <autarch> this would be a fucking riot
[23:14] <autarch> lol donna
[23:14] <autarch> holy shit, rekt
[23:15] <dvr> they have lights now?
[23:15] <Trebbers> so they have electricity now
[23:15] <dan2> that's the power of the mail
[23:15] <autarch> hell yeah
[23:15] <autarch> this penn jillette looking guy is really good
[23:15] <impdentist> they had lights the first time, i was wondering about it
[23:16] <dvr> horses suck at distance, ftr
[23:16] <dan2> I would not want to be a rider, hopefully I could score a gig designing stamps
[23:16] <Trebbers> Love all these dudes getting murked over Kev's dumb lie
[23:16] <dvr> yeah he's kinda just bringing trouble wherever he goes
[23:17] <donnamartin> i mean this is just his bull durham character remade
[23:17] <autarch> the idea that no other ham radio freak is still at it isn't believable at all
[23:18] <dan2> he should give his crow a cig
[23:18] <dan2> "Celebrity birthdays"
[23:18] <dvr> births, deaths, weather, gossip, fast food
[23:18] <Bob511> "And who is even sending out all these Valpak mailers?"
[23:18] <kayke> so they have a printing press?
[23:19] <impdentist> lol bob
[23:19] <dan2> haha bob
[23:19] <autarch> "do you like boats?"
[23:19] <Trebbers> Yeah, you don't want the route with the militia hq on it
[23:19] <dvr> haha
[23:20] <@Amp> 410757864530 DEAD POSTMEN
[23:20] <Trebbers> waste these fools
[23:21] <donnamartin> poor horses
[23:21] <Trebbers> Sure USPS really loved all the gunplay by mail carriers
[23:21] <Bob511> People in the '90s were really attached to the stereotype of the violent postal employee, huh?
[23:21] <autarch> got his ass
[23:21] <Trebbers> Nah, shoot him
[23:22] <autarch> keep shooting
[23:22] <dan2> tampering with the mail is now a capitol offence
[23:22] <donnamartin> i kind of hope somewhere out there is Postman cosplay
[23:24] <Trebbers> this is so dumb
[23:24] <@Amp> ya can't keep delivering the mail!
[23:24] <autarch> what
[23:24] <autarch> is this nam guy's doing?
[23:24] <laserblast> damn bachelor in paradise has really elevated the boom boom room
[23:25] <Trebbers> Sick
[23:25] <impdentist> not bad
[23:25] <donnamartin> You've Got Male(s)
[23:25] <autarch> lol
[23:25] <impdentist> he was a copier salesman
[23:26] <impdentist> feel like between the towns and the postmen they could repel  these guys
[23:26] <autarch> stop fighting children!
[23:26] <donnamartin> yeah but he was a really good copier salesman
[23:27] <dvr> this is all just one big town
[23:27] <dvr> like a 5x5 sqmi world
[23:28] <dvr> head north 2000 yards!
[23:28] <dan2> all of the east coast has recovered, they just don't want to go to Oregon
[23:28] <autarch> damn that kid's haircut is not good
[23:29] <dan2> I kind of doubt he heard you, but it's still appreciated
[23:29] <Trebbers> Resend me!
[23:29] <dvr> "if you need me ill be in my sea-shell house!"
[23:30] <dan2> "Peace and love to you all"
[23:30] <impdentist> i can't believe how dumb it is that he doesn't have a name
[23:30] <dan2> even Ringo is mad at the price of stamps
[23:30] <Trebbers> crying guy
[23:30] <autarch> what is with these people and burning?
[23:31] <@Amp> i do love his chunky turtleneck
[23:31] <Trebbers> yeah
[23:31] <dan2> even Deranged Granny didn't have a turtleneck that thick
[23:32] <autarch> these people aren't even far from minneapolis, like they're probably on the outskirts of la crosse, wi or something
[23:33] <autarch> yeah abby
[23:33] <dan2> we've all been there
[23:33] <autarch> have you considered that it's all fuckin bullshit?
[23:33] <autarch> that thing's still not alive?
[23:33] <autarch> does this movie take place in real time?
[23:34] <dan2> "I think that's a horse, sir"
[23:36] <dvr> i miss Bil
[23:36] <dvr> Bill
[23:36] <dan2> forget names, ask what the hell that hat is
[23:37] <donnamartin> it's a patchwork bucket hat duh
[23:37] <autarch> "should we fire?" he's literally right behind them
[23:38] <donnamartin> wow this show has no beef with killing kids
[23:39] <dvr> maybe pick some less cool places to live and you'll stop getting invaded
[23:39] <impdentist> ahahaha
[23:39] <Bob511> Man
[23:39] <dan2> yesss
[23:39] <Trebbers> oh man
[23:39] <donnamartin> lol
[23:39] <Bob511> Even knowing it was coming
[23:39] <sideshowraheem> this had been going on so long I forgot about the opening credits
[23:39] <dan2> the beauty of this movie is that it's so long that you forget that they told you Tom Petty was gonna be in this 1 minute in
[23:39] <Bob511> Ahaha
[23:39] <@Amp> what
[23:39] <donnamartin> he said you were runnin down a dream?
[23:39] <@Amp> oh my god
[23:39] <autarch> tom petty?
[23:39] <autarch> wait
[23:40] <impdentist> oh man he's actually tom petty
[23:40] <autarch> oh my fucking god
[23:40] <@Amp> beautiful
[23:40] <autarch> i'm dying
[23:40] <autarch> best movie
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[23:40] <dan2> finally, a mayor with hair
[23:40] <dan2> things are progressing
[23:40] <autarch> i love that the question of "What happens to tom petty?" is answered
[23:40] <donnamartin> at this point i assumed i had missed tom petty
[23:41] <donnamartin> i wanna know how they came up with a plan to get tom petty in this movie
[23:41] <dan2> please don't harsh the vibes in Bridge City
[23:41] <dvr> maybe the militia guy was a megafan and it will all be okay?
[23:42] <impdentist> did that kid just rat him out
[23:42] <impdentist> oh
[23:42] <autarch> "no thanks i'm not hungry"
[23:43] <donnamartin> so i still hate bicentennial man more, but i think this movie will always confound me more
[23:43] <donnamartin> lol petty just doing great work here
[23:43] <autarch> petty!!!
[23:43] <dvr> haha
[23:43] <dan2> is Bridge City a real place? I want to move
[23:44] <donnamartin> petty was high while filming, right?
[23:44] <dvr> ass
[23:44] <Bob511> He did look like he was way up there, yeah
[23:45] <donnamartin> lol
[23:45] <autarch> didn't michael treat her like shit?
[23:45] <dan2> he was just mumpy
[23:45] <dvr> heh
[23:45] <donnamartin> nah he just had mumps
[23:45] <donnamartin> lol dan
[23:46] <Bob511> She waited her entire life for a man with functional balls.
[23:46] <dan2> how have Kev's gloves held up so well
[23:46] <donnamartin> story of my life
[23:46] <impdentist> is it a giant cannon they're gonna launch him out of?
[23:46] <dvr> who knows!
[23:46] <donnamartin> i want petty to just kill the bad guys with a really loud guitar blast
[23:47] <@Amp> lmao
[23:47] <dan2> full on leprechaun laugh
[23:47] <Bob511> Tom Petty spent the apocalypse building the world's biggest zipline.
[23:47] <autarch> "I was a traveler once, too. A wilbury, in fact"
[23:47] <dvr> wtf
[23:47] <donnamartin> petty channeling burt reynolds with that laugh
[23:47] <dan2> lol
[23:48] <@Amp> rocketing into Cliffhanger
[23:48] <impdentist> these shots of him just chilling in the zipline thing are hilarious
[23:48] <autarch> this is the best zipline scene I've ever seen in my life, hands down
[23:48] <kayke> this war lord guy isn't that good at being a war lord if like... teens delivering mail is his undoing
[23:49] <dan2> did humanity get wiped out because we just kept breeding way too many horses?
[23:49] <donnamartin> love that they edited this movie to 3 hours and were like, nope, can't edit it down anymore
[23:49] <dan2> all of our food just went to horses instead?
[23:49] <donnamartin> they will remember the night they fought the titans
[23:49] <autarch> every scene is necessasry imo
[23:50] <impdentist> remember when they were in that cabin for like half an hour for no discernible reason
[23:50] <dan2> HBO if you're still looking for a replacement for Game of Thrones, might I suggest a 7 season long Postman series
[23:50] <dvr> right amount of flying gondola imo
[23:50] <impdentist> this would be much better as a series i feel like
[23:50] <autarch> imp, they were nursing each other back to health
[23:50] <dvr> battle scene . yawn
[23:50] <kayke> they were eating snow
[23:50] <Trebbers> Has this dude even really fought a real battle
[23:51] <autarch> oh shit
[23:51] <impdentist> were there more guys up on the ledge
[23:51] <autarch> he's calling in drone strikes?
[23:51] <pretty_postman> perhaps the "game" is "played" with... guns?
[23:51] <kayke> his baby
[23:52] <autarch> oh jeez. this shit again.
[23:52] <kayke> he has to get back ford v ferarri
[23:52] <autarch> i want more movie.
[23:52] <donnamartin> love that a gap sweater had such a starring role in this
[23:53] <dan2> I can't even imagine how much sweat must have soaked into that during months of filming
[23:53] <impdentist> god damn, chekhov strikes again
[23:53] <Bob511> Haha
[23:53] <Trebbers> dkdakfd
[23:53] <autarch> oh shit
[23:53] <dan2> god yes
[23:54] <pretty_postman> they were in the same frat?
[23:54] <Bob511> I guess at least one postal stripper outfit survived the rain bomb plague.
[23:54] <dan2> hah
[23:54] <Trebbers> ahah
[23:54] <autarch> he brought a whole army to the gun show
[23:54] <kayke> omg he is just realizing it now
[23:54] <donnamartin> he seriously didn't get this until now?
[23:54] <impdentist> oh
[23:54] <donnamartin> lol bob
[23:55] <donnamartin> what the fuck is this fighting technique?
[23:55] <impdentist> i guess that's why they usually have lances and stuff when jousting
[23:55] <kayke> the war lord needs glasses, but he won't wear them because it's not macho
[23:55] <autarch> this is how we fight in this country
[23:55] <Trebbers> just jump off your fuckin horse
[23:55] <donnamartin> this is .... honeslty kind of sad?
[23:55] <autarch> Kev Jitsu
[23:55] <dan2> sad but, weirdly true to life if you think about it
[23:55] <donnamartin> all that mma training paying off
[23:55] <pretty_postman> thank god this is pg-13
[23:55] <kayke> I haven't been in a fight in a very long time, but this seems right
[23:55] <donnamartin> three fucking hours and this is how we're gonna end it?
[23:55] <Trebbers> This grabass cost like 750,000 a minute to film
[23:56] <autarch> they're both gonna die, aren't they
[23:56] <donnamartin> i hope so
[23:56] <dvr> mule Bill is already dead who cares
[23:56] <dan2> rubbin the beard right into his forehead
[23:56] <dan2> brutal
[23:56] <donnamartin> power move
[23:57] <donnamartin> FOR BILL
[23:57] <kayke> i believe in a thing called love
[23:57] <autarch> lol his face
[23:57] <@Amp> this is how nations are born
[23:57] <donnamartin> this is a bonkers fucking movie
[23:57] <sideshowraheem> the cuts to his underling are so crazy
[23:57] <kayke> so is he president now?
[23:57] <donnamartin> what if there's no country?
[23:57] <kayke> ford loves to cause drama
[23:58] <dan2> just like Mr. Brooks, he wants to stop killing
[23:58] <dvr> uh oh. think quick
[23:58] <impdentist> is this really going to work
[23:58] <kayke> 'alright, yeah'
[23:58] <Trebbers> 3. Don't Worry
[23:58] <autarch> "alright, sure, why not"
[23:58] <Trebbers> 4. Be Happy
[23:58] <dan2> "Huh, now that you mention it"
[23:58] <donnamartin> i really thikn it's fine to kill him
[23:59] <@Amp> eat shit... and live
[23:59] <@Amp> lmao
[23:59] <kayke> so are they going to reinvent prison?
[23:59] <@Amp> deserved that
[23:59] <dan2> yoink
[23:59] <autarch> hey probaly had a ton of crowd shots to choose from and they chose "alright, yeah"
[23:59] <Trebbers> You gotta have a trial at least
[23:59] <donnamartin> jesus they never learn
[23:59] <dvr> I AM THE LAWWWW
[23:59] <@Amp> really wish that guy was Stallone
[23:59] <donnamartin> i see a lotta lawwwwbreakers here
[00:00] <donnamartin> this movie would have been better with mcconaughey
[00:00] <kayke> okay war over I guess, good game
[00:01] <impdentist> her name is a-mail-ia
[00:01] <autarch> back when he said "you're no general" he should have followed it up with "but I am - a postmaster general"
[00:01] <kayke> her dress is made out of diorama moss
[00:01] <Trebbers> haha autarch
[00:01] <dan2> "Eh that's no good for a name...what about Bill?"
[00:01] <Trebbers> quiet waterfall
[00:01] <donnamartin> i love that this movie implied the warlord couldn't get it up and costner got to cuck a dude
[00:02] <donnamartin> and that's not even the weird part
[00:02] <kayke> boats are back!
[00:02] <autarch> ah cool. suburbs are back
[00:02] <Bob511> Went right back to mid-90s fashion.
[00:02] <dan2> Mummified Bill under that sheet
[00:02] <kayke> oh it's the scene we all hated
[00:02] <dvr> heh dan
[00:02] <autarch> they chose the right moment
[00:03] <autarch> shoulda gone with a zipline shot
[00:03] <dvr> lmao
[00:03] <Trebbers> ahahhaah
[00:03] <autarch> lol
[00:03] <Trebbers> Thanks for spelling it out movie
[00:03] <impdentist> he did that to a lot of kids dude
[00:03] <Bob511> They cast that huge statue within the calendar year of him dying?
[00:03] <donnamartin> ooooh myyyyy gooood
[00:03] <@Amp> they reinvented shitty clothes so quickly
[00:03] <dan2> "My hair did NOT look like that"
[00:03] <autarch> how could they make this statue if NOBODY WITNESSED THAT MOMENT EXCEPT THE KID AND HIS MOM
[00:03] <donnamartin> oh thanks movie
[00:03] <autarch> maybe the kid is the sculptor
[00:03] <kayke> you're so vain, I bet you think this statues about you
[00:03] <donnamartin> lol
[00:03] <@Amp> damn, that's also me
[00:04] <donnamartin> god fucking hell this movie
[00:04] <@Amp> gonna recreate that with my mailman tomorrow
[00:04] <donnamartin> just clubs you over the head
[00:04] <dan2> god fucking hell what a movie
[00:04] <impdentist> all right that was wild
[00:04] <autarch> incredible
[00:04] <dan2> still love it
[00:04] <kayke> okay, who was a better delivery person-- the postman or balto?
[00:04] <donnamartin> my mom has run after the post lady three times in one year to make sure she got a bill
[00:04] <autarch> obviously only saw the last 2 hours but I loved it
[00:04] <donnamartin> so that could be my mom
[00:04] <autarch> The Postman whoops ass
[00:04] <kayke> mother of letter boy
[00:04] <dvr> for the last 24 yeasr i thought that was a paul revere movie
[00:04] <Trebbers> Derk Cheetwood
[00:04] <kayke> adult letter boy
[00:05] <donnamartin> i did too dvr
[00:05] <pretty_postman> changing my name to adult letter boy
[00:05] <dan2> autarch I'm so glad that you've joined the fold
[00:05] <donnamartin> well, actually i thought it was a post civil war movie
[00:05] <sideshowraheem> I mean it technically takes place after the civil war
[00:05] <Trebbers> It is
[00:05] <kayke> debbi bossi
[00:05] <donnamartin> oh okay music change
[00:05] <dvr> Non-mumps Sperm Theme
[00:05] <dan2> Budget $80 million[2] Box office $20.8 million[2][3]
[00:05] <kayke> oof
[00:06] <donnamartin> they thought people were gonna buy this soundtrack
[00:06] <dan2> the people just weren't ready for it
[00:06] <kayke> like a tree limb to the balls, that boxoffice
[00:06] <dvr> haha kayke
[00:06] <donnamartin> lol
[00:06] <impdentist> please let this be tom petty
[00:06] <kayke> jaimie trueblood
[00:06] <dvr> is this "love hurts"?
[00:06] <Bob511> I mean, $80m for three hours isn't like they were profligate, I suppose.
[00:06] <dan2> Tom Petty and the Horse Eaters
[00:06] <impdentist> oh uh
[00:07] <autarch> God, that shot of the zipline rope just disappearing into the distance, going on forever, was amazing
[00:07] <Trebbers> ahah
[00:07] <kayke> karen fuchs
[00:07] <autarch> dan, lol
[00:07] <donnamartin> Costner defended the film: "I always thought it was a really good movie! I always thought I probably started it wrong. I should have said something like “once upon a time.” Because it was just like a modern-day fairy tale — it wraps itself up with a storybook ending with the statue. You know, I thought it was a pretty funny movie set against the idea of a Superman — somebody stepping up. But in this case, it’s a
[00:07] <autarch> Angobaldo
[00:08] <dvr> yeah, it would have been 160mil if the first line was different
[00:08] <@Amp> lol
[00:08] <dvr> made 160mil
[00:08] <pretty_postman> hopefully this song is 3 hrs long too
[00:08] <Bob511> Wait, that $20m was WORLDWIDE?
[00:08] <pretty_postman> uh wait this is Costner singing?
[00:08] <donnamartin> i don't think this movie has a big international audience?
[00:08] <@Amp> the classic storybook ending where they make a statue of you
[00:08] <dan2> oh it's Amy Grant
[00:08] <dvr> heh amp
[00:09] <dan2> why does it have to credit Dolph Lundgren personally
[00:09] <donnamartin> why not?
[00:09] <impdentist> all the names in this actually were fictitious
[00:10] <Trebbers> "We're sorry about the horses"
[00:10] <autarch> omg
[00:10] <dan2> whoa
[00:10] <autarch> that tig productins
[00:10] <@Amp> Ten Years Later...
[00:10] <donnamartin> oh okay
[00:10] <impdentist> incredible production company logo
[00:10] == dvr [webchat@cloak-3yi5j6vp.hsd1.co.comcast.net] has left #hpnmovieseries []
[00:10] <donnamartin> fuck, damn
[00:10] <donnamartin> that's...what was a movie
[00:10] <@Amp> thanks so much, everybody! have a great night!
[00:10] <autarch> i'm going back and watching the first hour
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Postby Autarch » Mon Sep 20, 2021 12:43 am

fuck. that movie was really good.
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Postby Catullus » Mon Sep 20, 2021 6:49 am

3 hours

hours

HOURS
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Postby Ampersand » Tue Sep 21, 2021 10:05 am

Jeremy wrote:I'm not going to be able to do the movie tonight because I just started a new job and I have to get up at like 6:30am for it but I just want to say that when I started the movie series I was in an extremely bad place in my life and it was one of the few things I had to look forward to. When I abandoned it I was similarly in a really bad place but the fact that it continued and that I was eventually able to return as a participant allowed it to stay one of the few things I had to look forward to. When I moved onto the graveyard shift my schedule pretty much completely prevented me from participating and this is going to sound ridiculous given how much damage that job did to me, but preventing me from continuing to hang out with you all and take in these artifacts was genuinely one of the worst things about it. Ampersand and Dan, you've both done an incredible job with this thing, certainly a much better job than I possibly could have. The regulars are all phenomenally funny and the pace and quality of quips in chat is always astonishing.

Happy 10th anniversary and I hope everyone enjoys The Postman.


Ahhh, I didn't see this until now. Thank you, Jeremy. :cry: <3 <3 <3
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Postby Ampersand » Tue Sep 21, 2021 10:07 am

THIS WEDNESDAY, the film that launched an entire Lifetime Movie Club
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Postby Kevin McCallister » Tue Sep 21, 2021 10:24 am

God this is one of my favourite goofin' movies.

It's also the quintessential Microfiche Thriller.
kranky wrote:the monster mash isn't actually halloween specific and is just a monster party that could happen at any time.
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 22, 2021 12:50 pm

heyooooo this is TONIGHT.
Movie will be delayed getting into the place until I'm home this evening, so stay tuned. For regulars, it is in the other, older place already
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Postby donna martin » Wed Sep 22, 2021 2:39 pm

Kevin McCallister wrote:God this is one of my favourite goofin' movies.

It's also the quintessential Microfiche Thriller.


Sadly I will have to miss this but co-sign.
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 22, 2021 6:14 pm

Bump!
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Postby BlackSugar » Wed Sep 22, 2021 7:52 pm

it'll be kinda funny if its all guys commenting on this
I come like a thousand doves
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 22, 2021 8:39 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
single white female

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Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 22, 2021 8:58 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
single white female

Image
https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 22, 2021 10:57 pm

Code: Select all
[22:13] <@Amp> 3
[22:13] <@Amp> 2
[22:13] <@Amp> 1
[22:14] <dan2> hey wait a minute, that was double white females
[22:14] <besoin> those little girls were in kindergarten cop
[22:15] <kayke> credits are a little hackery
[22:15] <Trebbers> Welcome back tobo
[22:15] <Trebbers> Wait, was Canyonero a name just now
[22:16] <Bob511> Based on the classified ad by...
[22:16] <bs> I lutz it
[22:16] <kayke> a lot of silk!
[22:16] <dvr> cant wait to see this 1992 computer
[22:16] <besoin> they live on the set of a meatloaf video
[22:16] <dan2> Roos also wrote Marley and Me
[22:16] <dan2> the screenplay at least
[22:16] <kayke> horses IN the back
[22:16] <bs> bridget got that stone roses haircut
[22:17] <kayke> she has fairy hair
[22:18] <besoin> is she entitled?
[22:18] <besoin> she's white alright
[22:18] <kayke> answering machines suck. like if I don't pick up, I don't want to hear the call
[22:18] <kayke> it's involuntary phone calls
[22:19] <dvr> that bear...
[22:19] <lhs> shh, brahms is sleeping
[22:19] <besoin> no way anyone would put up with these acoustics
[22:20] <kayke> what is his magician painting?!
[22:20] <besoin> "i was going to cry on your shoulder, but i don't want to ruin your shoulder hair"
[22:20] <Trebbers> Ok
[22:20] <Trebbers> what is that
[22:20] <dan2> was it Houdini?
[22:20] <Trebbers> Is he magic too?
[22:20] <bs> pogues are playing
[22:20] <lhs> that's another entry in my "paintings in movies" thread i'll never make
[22:20] <besoin> ePaperDolls
[22:21] <dan2> "Chuck E. Cheese?"
[22:21] <kayke> it looked like houdini doing magic in front of a buddha statue
[22:21] <besoin> who wants to deal with a client this nosy
[22:21] <dvr> everyone seems sleepy
[22:22] <dan2> Meowna Lisa
[22:22] <kayke> her ex took the bed frame?
[22:22] <besoin> she should just sublet this apartment
[22:23] <Trebbers> But the dude just moved in
[22:24] <besoin> faxing the ad. very modern.
[22:24] <bs> he's the least gay gay friend I can remember
[22:24] <besoin> another andrea from 90210 cosplayer
[22:24] <dvr> heh
[22:24] <bs> "my therapist"
[22:25] <kayke> honestly, get a cat
[22:25] <kayke> if she can afford this apartment why is she getting a roommate?
[22:25] <lhs> i'm so confused about who was living where during the first 10 minutes of this
[22:25] <dan2> she doesn't wanna be alone
[22:25] <bs> in comes stevie nicks
[22:25] <kayke> she should just become a boarder then
[22:25] <dan2> lol
[22:25] <besoin> this apartment would be like $12K/mo now
[22:26] <bs> they should have a pillow fight now
[22:27] <Trebbers> Slow burn sitcom setup
[22:27] <Bob511> Pretty shitty for two Hollywood scions to squat on a rent-stabilized NYC apartment, really.
[22:28] <besoin> wait, what the fuck -- jennifer jason leigh's father was vic morrow. the guy who had his head cut off by a helicopter on the set of twilight zone. never knew that.
[22:28] <dan2> dang
[22:28] <Trebbers> Didn't know that either
[22:28] <kayke> I missed "zone" and was like "when was there a helicopter in twilight?"
[22:28] <besoin> the helicopter in twilight fanfic 50 shades darker
[22:29] <kayke> lol
[22:29] <kayke> speaking of twilight zone
[22:29] <besoin> i feel like bridget's look and character here was influenced by demi moore in ghost
[22:29] <dan2> her pants you mean?
[22:30] <besoin> shouldn't she be coding
[22:30] <kayke> polishing silver together, just girl stuff
[22:30] <besoin> "from the movie ghost"
[22:30] <bs> friend montage
[22:30] <dan2> very belt heavy movie
[22:30] <kayke> friends wear shoes
[22:31] <kayke> I just keep hearing the "and they were roommates" vine in my head
[22:31] <Trebbers> Moi Meme?
[22:31] <lhs> myself
[22:31] <kayke> my meme
[22:31] <besoin> JJL's mother wrote the screenplays for cujo and pollock
[22:32] <kayke> boopies
[22:32] <besoin> fast times on the upper west side
[22:33] <Bob511> She was still born?  And then what happened to her?
[22:33] <kayke> hahaha
[22:33] <lhs> heh
[22:33] <lhs> you had to paint iron lamps pink yourself before anthropologie was invented
[22:33] <kayke> establishing a barter system in the apartment
[22:34] <besoin> anyone else get JJL and ally sheedy mixed up?
[22:34] <kayke> what was in the second bedroom before twin moved in? there's no furniture here
[22:34] <dan2> you could put a halfpipe in this apartment's living room
[22:35] <dan2> where the hell did he come from?
[22:35] <lhs> this buddy was manifested from the very air
[22:35] <dan2> Spontaneous Generation Buddies
[22:35] <kayke> that's barely a puppy
[22:35] <dan2> "Free with every basket of green beans"
[22:36] <dvr> let me change out of my billy corgan jacket and ill think about it
[22:36] <kayke> another room??
[22:37] <dan2> Thuggee?
[22:37] <@Amp> pup wants out
[22:37] <besoin> CRTs are kind of hilarious looking now
[22:37] <dan2> damn this is the life
[22:37] <kayke> single yellow lab
[22:38] <bs> this was me and my buddy phil but less sexy
[22:39] <kayke> cookies... for DOGS?!
[22:40] == autarch [webchat@cloak-b1ntmd72.hsd1.il.comcast.net] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:40] <autarch> T??
[22:40] <autarch> T??
[22:40] <dvr> 27:00
[22:40] <dan2> 27:00
[22:41] <dvr> HEADY..!
[22:41] <autarch> thanks
[22:41] <dvr> or HEDDY..!
[22:42] <besoin> ISLES
[22:42] <dvr> hey its happy gilmore's mom
[22:42] <autarch> what'd i miss?
[22:42] <dvr> or grandma
[22:42] <kayke> roommates
[22:42] <besoin> they were roommates
[22:42] <lhs> a lot of belted tunics
[22:43] <besoin> yikes
[22:43] <autarch> good look
[22:43] <kayke> truth in her well
[22:45] <autarch> we saw the roommate right?
[22:46] <dan2> do you think she's a ghost?
[22:46] <dan2> "You got belts to spare"
[22:47] <lhs> for her, finding someone is a cinch
[22:47] <dan2> haha
[22:47] <besoin> F9
[22:48] <bs> the rolodex
[22:48] <kayke> bathroom water
[22:48] <besoin> i hope she peed
[22:49] <dan2> the bathroom water is never cold enough
[22:49] <kayke> she's drinking bathroom water and he's got a pepsi?!
[22:49] <kayke> unjust
[22:49] <@Amp> puppy got no water
[22:49] <dan2> Marley and Leigh
[22:49] <kayke> and he doesn't brush his teeth
[22:49] <@Amp> heh
[22:50] <dan2> "Mr Marbles?"
[22:50] <dvr> hah
[22:50] <kayke> scooby dooin' around
[22:50] <Trebbers> Let the puppy learn
[22:51] <dan2> the puppy saw some sweater puppies and got confused
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[22:51] <dvr> is that tetris music
[22:52] <kayke> scramble the orange
[22:53] <kayke> is she mad her roommate jerked it?
[22:53] <dvr> hope you get a table, good luck
[22:54] <Trebbers> wah
[22:54] <Bob511> From Puppy Chow to ciao, puppy. :(
[22:54] <dan2> "this is only 500,000 sq. feet!"
[22:55] <Trebbers> "He left a note!"
[22:55] <lhs> ground bud
[22:55] <besoin> i checked doesthedogdie.com before the movie, so i was ready for this
[22:55] <Trebbers> Smash cut to funeral
[22:55] <dan2> they're givin em away at the farmer's market, just pick up a few more on your way home
[22:56] <bs> "clapton jr is dead!"
[22:57] <lhs> liquid shout sounds like a euphemism for vomiting
[22:57] <Trebbers> oh man
[22:58] <dan2> belts as ties, now there's an idea
[22:59] <besoin> tobo no
[22:59] <kayke> I love her computer generated suits
[23:00] <kayke> just the mickey mouse stuff
[23:00] <Trebbers> jesus
[23:00] <dan2> kayke you need to watch this Alter Ego show that's coming to...Fox I think?
[23:00] <besoin> ugh
[23:00] <kayke> omg dan is this like masked singer but they're computer generated?
[23:01] <dan2> yes, that's exactly it
[23:01] <dan2> may need it's own thread
[23:01] <besoin> this scene is going on too long
[23:01] <besoin> bing
[23:01] <dan2> Needledick Ned
[23:02] <Trebbers> Tobo lowblow
[23:02] <dan2> heh
[23:03] <kayke> taking velma's look and making it frumpier somehow
[23:05] <dvr> lol
[23:05] <dan2> perfection
[23:05] <kayke> hahahha
[23:05] <besoin> now we both look like demi moore in ghost
[23:05] <dan2> it's a COMLIMENT
[23:05] <lhs> she borrowed the older sister's funeral outfit from the open door
[23:05] <@Amp> gosh my neck feels free
[23:05] <Trebbers> This feels so good!
[23:05] <kayke> I'd just move to a new city
[23:06] == bs [webchat@cloak-06iem42x.hsd1.va.comcast.net] has quit [Ping timeout]
[23:06] <Bob511> The apartment, though.
[23:06] <dan2> I'm seein double here...Four White Females!
[23:06] <besoin> gonna find her old garbage pail kids
[23:07] <kayke> still born... and then died 9 years later
[23:07] <Bob511> Can't believe "Hedy" was not a real name.
[23:08] <dan2> https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-o5SxC4ZIfY/maxresdefault.jpg
[23:09] <kayke> we didn't see her cat sit
[23:09] <dan2> yeah that's kind of a weird detail
[23:09] <kayke> did the cat get sat?
[23:10] <Bob511> Just sitting on a mound of litter and feces.
[23:10] <kayke> "she has something of mine... my lewk"
[23:10] <besoin> hell yes, some enigma
[23:10] <besoin> MCMXC
[23:11] <Bob511> The guy with his hand to chin.
[23:11] <lhs> fuck club just playing this CD on loop
[23:11] <Bob511> "Hmm...yes...interesting...."
[23:11] <besoin> she bumps into benson and stabler undercover
[23:11] <dan2> lol
[23:12] <besoin> opsec
[23:13] <besoin> sadly there's no doesthegaybestiedie.com
[23:13] <kayke> there should be, I'm scared
[23:14] <dan2> yeah we did not see this cat before because I would have remembered
[23:14] <besoin> it's the cat he asked her to feed though
[23:14] <kayke> please protect this man and cat from harm
[23:15] <besoin> i don't think that would work
[23:16] <dan2> no way on earth
[23:16] <dan2> love tha jackin'
[23:16] <dan2> should have bought a guard cat for protection
[23:16] <kayke> nooo
[23:17] <dvr> guard llamas are a thing too
[23:17] <Trebbers> Really just left his head right out there
[23:18] <besoin> https://vanishingrabbit.com/posters-all/escher-buddha-vintage-magic-poster-en/
[23:21] <dan2> "We'll stop sending the Chex if you don't come"
[23:22] <dvr> sounded lik eElliott Gould on the phone
[23:23] <besoin> as if he wouldn't know
[23:23] <kayke> damn he is zonked though
[23:24] <kayke> could be ronald mcdonald down there, he's so jetlagged
[23:24] <besoin> heh
[23:24] <Trebbers> Aint that the way
[23:24] <@Amp> lol
[23:24] <dan2> I don't really know what kind of music cue you do in this scene, but I don't think it's this
[23:24] <dvr> haha dan
[23:24] <besoin> there once was a man from nantucket
[23:26] <dan2> we got balls
[23:26] <Trebbers> waoh
[23:26] <dan2> the ball to boob ratio is severly out of whack though
[23:26] <Trebbers> Well now the scales are balanced
[23:26] <dan2> unless they REALLY turn things around in the last act
[23:27] <besoin> sadly there's no doestheguyfromwingsdie.com
[23:27] <dan2> hah
[23:28] <kayke> oh wow, the friend shoes
[23:28] <besoin> i mean, you can't let people hit you in the face with things
[23:28] <lhs> stilettos really are murder on your feet
[23:28] <besoin> heyo
[23:28] <dan2> what an awful clock for telling time
[23:30] <kayke> baby formula for breakfast again?
[23:31] <besoin> there's a snake in mah boot
[23:34] <dan2> she did this whole months long con just to steal some bras
[23:34] <lhs> the three other drawers are full of belts
[23:37] <Trebbers> ah
[23:39] <besoin> thwarted by the check cashing place
[23:39] <Bob511> Already scouting new marks.
[23:40] <besoin> this isn't a horror movie. it's a utopia where noise complaints matter.
[23:40] <lhs> hey don't turn off front 242
[23:41] <lhs> they never play their videos!
[23:41] <besoin> the neighbors don't hear this?
[23:42] <dan2> this tape doesn't look strong to me
[23:42] <dan2> same with what she put over the vents
[23:42] <dan2> makes me think she bought a bunch of crappy tape but didn't have the heart to just throw it out
[23:42] <besoin> she's off to take over nick carter's life
[23:43] <dvr> the trex is out of its pen!
[23:43] <Trebbers> LOST!
[23:43] <besoin> ah ah ah -- bing bing bing
[23:44] <dan2> within 1 hour all the clothes on earth will be gone
[23:44] <besoin> i bet this will make him wanna cry
[23:44] <besoin> a little ransomware humor
[23:45] <Trebbers> shitty typer
[23:46] <besoin> who is don whoever
[23:46] <kayke> lobby painting is lit
[23:46] <dan2> good movie premise: a modern tween gets kidnapped and has to try and figure out how to get a message out with 80s era technology
[23:46] <besoin> heh
[23:46] <dan2> tell me Netflix wouldn't greenlight that garbage in a second
[23:47] <besoin> "damn it...where are the filters?!"
[23:48] <besoin> saved by this guy's abusive energy
[23:48] <dan2> whuh
[23:48] <kayke> "Rescued by my Attempted Rapist" coming to LifeTime
[23:48] <lhs> stop straddling her, jesus
[23:48] <Trebbers> What a dummy
[23:48] <besoin> one more time: bing
[23:49] <lhs> aw cat :(
[23:49] <kayke> OH MY GOD
[23:49] <besoin> cat's fine
[23:49] <dan2> cat is chillin
[23:49] <Trebbers> The cat is waiting for the meat ripen
[23:49] <lhs> i know, it just looks so sad
[23:49] <Trebbers> *to ripen
[23:49] <kayke> he was moving though right?
[23:49] <kayke> like he was getting up?
[23:49] <Trebbers> yeah
[23:50] <besoin> saved by clippy
[23:50] <dan2> haha
[23:52] <kayke> king
[23:52] <Trebbers> Start kicking
[23:52] <dan2> you can't keep a good Graham down
[23:52] <kayke> concussed king
[23:53] <kayke> everyone is getting concussed actually
[23:53] <dan2> sound effects are so weird but I've never been in an elevator like this so maybe who knows
[23:54] <besoin> another false positive
[23:54] <lhs> does anyone ever fake unconsciousness when they're being choked
[23:54] <besoin> no one has ever lived to tell us if they tried it
[23:55] <kayke> I've faked being asleep to get out of conversations, same diff
[23:55] <dvr> lol
[23:55] <besoin> is this the same set from dunston checks in
[23:55] <dan2> Single Orange Ape
[23:55] <besoin> still time to be saved by that creep older brother on rollerblades
[23:55] <dan2> how in the world
[23:56] <kayke> rat toss!
[23:56] <Trebbers> Would not assume that the rat had been thrown by someone in a vent
[23:57] <Trebbers> waoh
[23:57] <dvr> like zelda 3 with rats just falling from the ceilings
[23:57] <dan2> damn
[23:57] <kayke> the core strength!
[23:57] <dan2> she somehow developed Dishonored powers in the last 5 minutes
[23:57] <besoin> she looks like joe dirt
[23:57] <lhs> finally found enough runes
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[23:57] <autarch> damn that hanging backstab was a SICK move
[23:57] <Trebbers> I would try to swing down and then fall and die
[23:58] <dan2> parrots
[23:58] <autarch> fuckin loved that
[23:58] <autarch> amazing move
[23:58] <dan2> oh welcome back
[23:58] <besoin> 29 cent stamps
[23:58] <dan2> good to have you for the last 5 seconds
[23:58] <lhs> thanks for checking in
[23:58] <kayke> creepy thing to have
[23:58] <autarch> i've been watching with cheugster
[23:58] <Trebbers> Mannish Applicant
[23:58] <dan2> lmao
[23:58] <autarch> loved it
[23:59] <@Amp> the next roommate will probably be alright
[23:59] <dan2> why didn't she pick that second roommate who seemed totally fine
[23:59] <besoin> what is this song
[23:59] <autarch> who is this?
[23:59] <kayke> she should just install stairs between her an graham's apartments
[23:59] <Trebbers> Def remember it
[00:00] <dan2> Nerdlinger?
[00:00] <besoin> spiritual high by moodswings
[00:00] <besoin> aka state of independence
[00:01] == dvr [webchat@cloak-3yi5j6vp.hsd1.co.comcast.net] has left #hpnmovieseries []
[00:01] <@Amp> night all! see ya Sunday for THE VOYEURS!
[00:01] <lhs> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZgx5ExT9iQ
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 26, 2021 9:53 am

TONIGHT
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 26, 2021 4:30 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT
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Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:30 pm

Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 26, 2021 7:02 pm

2 hours!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 26, 2021 8:46 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
The Voyeurs

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Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 26, 2021 9:00 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
The Voyeurs

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 26, 2021 11:03 pm

Code: Select all
[22:12] <Amp> 3
[22:12] <Amp> 2
[22:12] <Amp> 1
[22:12] <Amp> get out ur binoculars
[22:12] <Bob511> Feel like I should go out on the front lawn and watch this through the window, for the full effect.
[22:13] <besoin> this is surprisingly long
[22:13] <kayke> it's long because it's like two films
[22:13] <Trebbers> lolol movie
[22:13] <Amp> don't you get it. we were the voyeurs
[22:13] <besoin> kick it off with a little billy idol
[22:13] <ohitsmax> oh man
[22:13] <kayke> one you voy the other you eurs
[22:13] <Bob511> Will Bate
[22:14] <besoin> montreal
[22:14] <kayke> my dad called me the other day to say this was a good movie and I should watch it
[22:14] <dan2> that's sweet
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[22:14] <Amp> kayke's dad's favorite movie is White Chicks
[22:14] <autarch> did it start yet?
[22:14] <Amp> yes
[22:14] <autarch> oh noooo
[22:14] <Bob511> He speaks Pokemon AND French?
[22:15] <Trebbers> 2:30
[22:15] <dan2> lol bob
[22:15] <kayke> you were not on T
[22:15] <autarch> sry kayk
[22:15] <autarch> *kayke
[22:15] <Trebbers> 3:00
[22:15] <dan2> starting a "babe" count
[22:15] <dan2> we're at 1
[22:15] <Amp> so, i have not confirmed this, but i think he's doing a fake deep voice
[22:15] <autarch> wait. gimme 3:30
[22:15] <kayke> so far you missed them renting an apartment from someone with a french accent
[22:15] <dan2> 330
[22:16] <autarch> ty
[22:16] <Bob511> Pippachu
[22:16] <Amp> i mean, i watched the pikachu movie and he did not sound like that
[22:16] <autarch> man that guy's voice was deep
[22:16] <Trebbers> Scorpo water
[22:16] <dan2> "Chlorine Water"
[22:16] <besoin> corvid water? like a crow took a bath in it?
[22:16] <besoin> they're so happy. what could go wrong.
[22:17] <autarch> yes
[22:17] <lhs> they never buy curtains is my guess
[22:17] <autarch> dude want's to join parsonsfield
[22:17] <lhs> got this mixed up with the euphoria script
[22:18] <autarch> dude wants to join the dead south
[22:18] <kayke> he sounds like if the swedish chef spoke english
[22:18] <Trebbers> His fucking voice
[22:18] <dan2> goddamn kayke
[22:18] <besoin> yeah, not a fan of his voice
[22:18] <Trebbers> Grad Barrett
[22:18] <ohitsmax> ahaha
[22:18] <Amp> lmao
[22:18] <autarch> lol kayke
[22:18] <Amp> exact Swedish Chef quote
[22:18] <ohitsmax> ope
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[22:19] <autarch> i thought we already watched Mr. Brooks
[22:19] <dan2> gettit
[22:20] <besoin> the curtainless district
[22:20] <dan2> what kind of Pokeball was that?
[22:20] <kayke> jiggy puff got him
[22:20] <Amp> it took her three hours to get that on
[22:21] <Bob511> What a snorlax
[22:21] <besoin> not a fan of the score either
[22:21] <dan2> yeh?
[22:21] <Amp> this feels like a Hallmark Christmas movie scene but raunchy
[22:21] <kayke> two tone jacket is cool
[22:21] <Bob511> She put on mismatched coats.
[22:22] <dan2> ok I'm on board with this
[22:22] <besoin> is that mrs. kim??
[22:22] <dan2> PLEASE tell me the drinking bird comes into play later
[22:22] <besoin> what the
[22:22] <besoin> agh
[22:22] <kayke> eyeballs
[22:23] <kayke> a little desk cutting board
[22:23] <dan2> someone is gonna get their eye poked out by the Drinking Bird
[22:23] <kayke> for her egg
[22:23] <besoin> mrs. kim having no accent is so disorienting
[22:23] <lhs> when you see birds fucking on this outside your window
[22:23] <Bob511> Thought it was going to be a pair of those coin-operated binoculars.
[22:24] <dan2> babe count: 2
[22:24] <Trebbers> HuGGH BAAAAB
[22:24] <Amp> frieeends
[22:24] <besoin> how is this guy cast in anything with this voice
[22:25] <ohitsmax> swedish chef representation
[22:25] <Trebbers> what the shit
[22:25] <dan2> wow
[22:25] <besoin> pretty sure he'd die before that guy could get up there
[22:26] <autarch> jesus this is dumb
[22:26] <dan2> relationship goals
[22:26] <besoin> this is a real auditory assault
[22:26] <Amp> kiiiiiiingky
[22:26] <Trebbers> Totino almost claimed another victim
[22:26] <ohitsmax> ahah
[22:26] <autarch> the guy has the voice of the kid saying "hey look, they're e-bumpin'" in that one tim and eric sketch. idk if that means anything to anyone but it's true.
[22:27] <dan2> is she gonna start choking on something to try and get his attention
[22:27] <besoin> does he have a wagon
[22:27] <besoin> oh
[22:27] <dan2> sex wagon
[22:28] <besoin> she can see his veins, eh?
[22:28] <Amp> exquisitely sculpted
[22:28] <ohitsmax> wow her job gave her zoom vision
[22:28] <ohitsmax> perks
[22:28] <dan2> nipples that could break glass
[22:28] <besoin> i mean, there's no way he could see her
[22:28] <Trebbers> oh no
[22:28] <besoin> it's police lineup logic
[22:28] <kayke> just jammin and drinking gross juice
[22:28] <Amp> Scoring session for The Sims 5
[22:28] <kayke> lol
[22:29] <ohitsmax> ahah
[22:29] <besoin> if she buys binoculars will bate
[22:30] <ohitsmax> itsa me
[22:30] <kayke> it'sa her
[22:30] <dan2> heh
[22:30] <autarch> wahaaa!
[22:30] <Bob511> Hey!
[22:30] <ohitsmax> oh god damn
[22:30] <besoin> the movie knew you losers
[22:30] <Trebbers> you can't do that movie
[22:31] <lhs> babe #3
[22:31] <dan2> thank you I almost missed it
[22:31] <lhs> does it count when she says it
[22:32] <autarch> do they really need binos? i could probably no-scope them
[22:32] <dan2> yeah we're just going for total
[22:32] <lhs> okay that was #4
[22:32] <Amp> wa-wa-wahooo
[22:32] <autarch> amp
[22:32] <besoin> now this is what i call a mario party
[22:32] <autarch> lol
[22:32] <dan2> she's pulling out all his pubes that he never shaved
[22:32] <autarch> waluigi numbah one!
[22:32] <besoin> she seems pretty sure
[22:33] <ohitsmax> jeez
[22:33] <Amp> so many veins
[22:33] <lhs> is that aaron or nick carter, i never remember
[22:34] <autarch> yo that guy has a really small head, right?
[22:34] <ohitsmax> i said no kids!!
[22:34] <besoin> that was like 17 seconds
[22:34] <kayke> the jizz giggles
[22:34] <besoin> go pee, sydney
[22:34] <autarch> about 17 seconds too long, imo
[22:35] <dan2> do they just own that entire floor?
[22:36] <besoin> he has that taking pictures of nude women money
[22:37] <autarch> "the greater metropolitan area"
[22:37] <Trebbers> Check your lease, you're living in fuck city
[22:38] <kayke> is anyone science smart because I want to know if this is made up
[22:38] <lhs> https://lifehacker.com/build-a-laser-microphone-to-eavesdrop-on-conversations-5961503
[22:38] <besoin> it's real
[22:39] <besoin> the cia uses this stuff
[22:39] <lhs> you need a lot more than just a laser pointer though i guess
[22:39] <autarch> her name is pippa?
[22:39] <lhs> yes
[22:39] <dan2> I hope they use the naked lady laser pointer to really sell it
[22:39] <Trebbers> what
[22:40] <autarch> they're having a seder in their apartment
[22:40] <Bob511> Blinds Wide Shut
[22:40] <Amp> you know. he's a satyr now
[22:40] <kayke> lol autarch
[22:40] <lhs> heh bob
[22:40] <dan2> I'm counting that as a goat
[22:40] <Bob511> Ha
[22:40] <Trebbers> Hamburglers
[22:40] <ohitsmax> the hamburgler and his wife
[22:41] <besoin> uh
[22:41] <dan2> he smelled the burgers
[22:41] <kayke> hamburgler prom
[22:42] <dan2> he's about to burgle her heart
[22:42] <ohitsmax> lmao
[22:42] <autarch> The Hambugler
[22:42] <autarch> that's what I'm asking abt the movie
[22:42] <besoin> are they gonna plant the mirror or not
[22:43] <besoin> margo is margot
[22:43] <dan2> "We got our tape at a tape store" "So sick!"
[22:44] <ohitsmax> ahah
[22:44] <kayke> any of them
[22:44] <Bob511> I don't get the mirror part.
[22:44] <Bob511> Like, the point is to bounce the laser off the window.
[22:44] <besoin> she could just as easily have dressed up as royal
[22:45] <besoin> it'd be hard to miss a giant green laser
[22:45] <dan2> "That took a month to draw, babe"
[22:45] <Amp> freak
[22:45] <Trebbers> what
[22:46] <besoin> they just had an optic coupler lying around i guess
[22:46] <ohitsmax> don't we all
[22:46] <autarch> this is kinda sick
[22:46] <besoin> this movie's really putting the cock in hitchcock
[22:46] <dan2> this is just the audio of Christian Bale yelling at that camera guy
[22:47] <besoin> that was about sight lines too
[22:47] <ohitsmax> i feel guilty for eavesdropping, and it's only a movie
[22:47] <kayke> I like that she left the wig on for this
[22:47] <dan2> "Those boobs put food on the table"
[22:48] <besoin> and yet somehow pippa is still into him
[22:48] <ohitsmax> one egg a day
[22:50] <kayke> "zed"
[22:50] <autarch> justin timberlake's 20/20 was huge
[22:51] <ohitsmax> asmr eye exam
[22:51] <Amp> horny eye exam
[22:52] <dan2> they made the eye exam sexier than any of the sex scenes
[22:52] <dan2> the fuck
[22:52] <Amp> spoilers for Gone Girl
[22:53] <kayke> I do not understand how this is straight activity
[22:53] <dan2> "Bi"
[22:53] <kayke> lol
[22:53] <besoin> vas deff
[22:53] <Bob511> "VasDef"?
[22:53] <Trebbers> Vas Deff
[22:55] <Bob511> A Blow-Up poster, huh?
[22:55] <dan2> who's the client who just wants topless photos?
[22:55] <ohitsmax> will bate
[22:56] <dan2> "wait a minute...you can do that??"
[22:56] <besoin> they should spend the movie voyeuring that beefy guy with the weights
[22:56] <kayke> it was really uncool cunalingus
[22:57] <dan2> #5
[22:57] <dan2> that time I could feel it coming
[22:57] <kayke> I feel like putting a whole butternut squash in the hanging onion thing is living dangerously
[22:57] <lhs> yeah i was bracing
[22:58] <kayke> I hate their stupid fall out bunker apartment
[22:58] <dan2> ugh that pillow looks like a nightmare
[22:58] <lhs> "she needs to be babed"
[22:59] <besoin> "baby, i was reading EGM"
[22:59] <dan2> haha
[23:00] <Bob511> Living dangerously with those lamps.
[23:00] <dan2> I'm already so lost plot-wise
[23:00] <besoin> eh
[23:00] <dan2> probably because I spent a lot of the movie trying to immitate the guy's voice
[23:00] <lhs> heh
[23:00] <besoin> normal thing to do on your first time hanging out with someone
[23:00] <dan2> if you just press both of your thumbs up against your nostrils you can get close
[23:01] <lhs> they went out for spa-fee
[23:01] <dan2> wait the sauna has a window?
[23:01] <dan2> is that normal?
[23:01] <Amp> straight women things
[23:01] <kayke> they're sitting so weird
[23:02] <kayke> just gals being pals
[23:02] <lhs> just mudflap gals being pals
[23:02] <autarch> it's not that weird they look great
[23:02] <Amp> lmao
[23:02] <dan2> oh man lhs
[23:02] <besoin> "i don't have a message board"
[23:02] <autarch> wait is she australian?
[23:03] <dan2> you didn't hear how she said "weird"
[23:03] <Amp> "it's not my california raisin"
[23:03] <dan2> lol
[23:03] <autarch> this is what my pool room is like too
[23:03] <besoin> this is the horniest movie we've watched i think
[23:03] <dan2> looks like Soderbergh's Solaris
[23:03] <kayke> nakie
[23:03] <Amp> 100
[23:03] <Amp> Sup
[23:03] <autarch> is it hornier than hooking up?
[23:03] <autarch> is it hornier than twilight?
[23:04] <dan2> Love on a Leash was the horniest
[23:04] <lhs> those were more rapey and mormon than horny, respsectively
[23:04] <autarch> oh yeah, good call dan
[23:05] <dan2> SO random
[23:07] <lhs> i haven't spotted thomas's jack conte motivational poster yet, but i'll keep looking 
[23:07] <besoin> he should just apple key Q out of this stuff
[23:08] <kayke> I love that the mic can pick up any noise in the whole apartment
[23:08] <Trebbers> Why would she be able to do that
[23:08] <ohitsmax> terrorizing the neighborhood with random printouts
[23:08] <besoin> they don't lock their doors or their printers in canada, treb
[23:09] <kayke> sending her nic cage pics
[23:09] <Bob511> "Babe, the printer's haunted again."
[23:09] <Trebbers> This is the dumbest thing
[23:09] <dan2> Printstant Messaging
[23:09] <Amp> THE PRINTOUT IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE
[23:09] <ohitsmax> fuck
[23:10] <Bob511> "YOUR HUSBAND IS CHEATING ON YOU", but each letter is a different color test pattern.
[23:10] <kayke> I would buy this game on steam for 1.99
[23:10] <ohitsmax> your printer is cheating on you
[23:10] <dan2> if you set it on hard mode her printer only has 5 sheets of paper left
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[23:11] == autarch [webchat@cloak-b1ntmd72.hsd1.il.comcast.net] has joined #HPNMOVIESERIES
[23:11] <dan2> "ALSO WATCH OUT, THERE MIGHT BE SOME CAKE CRUMBS IN YOUR BED"
[23:11] <ohitsmax> lol
[23:11] <autarch> haha
[23:12] <kayke> "I sent her the script for Bee Movie"
[23:12] <besoin> does the christian god reveal herself via unsecured printers
[23:12] <besoin> peer in
[23:12] <Trebbers> Uh
[23:12] <ohitsmax> yessss
[23:12] <lhs> babe, you're grounded
[23:12] <besoin> do iit
[23:12] <dan2> just going for a big slice of cake
[23:12] <ohitsmax> she is gonna cut him another piece of cake
[23:12] <ohitsmax> DAMNJ
[23:12] <dan2> I'd do the same thing
[23:13] <dan2> :)
[23:13] <besoin> he's a heavy sleeper
[23:13] <ohitsmax> there is an hour left
[23:13] <ohitsmax> lmao
[23:13] <kayke> babe this is so uncool
[23:14] <autarch> lol
[23:14] <ohitsmax> interesting outfit
[23:15] <besoin> the part of this where he's mad at her is dumb
[23:15] <dan2> wait he's losing the voice
[23:16] <kayke> he's dressed like he teaches preschoolers circus acts for a living
[23:16] <ohitsmax> :(
[23:16] <autarch> stop slapping the corpse
[23:17] <autarch> he's too horny
[23:17] <besoin> this is dumb
[23:17] <dan2> yeah I don't get why he's mad
[23:17] <Bob511> Wait, this voyeuristic couple is...Pippa-Tom
[23:17] <dan2> wow
[23:17] <kayke> lol bob
[23:17] <besoin> a little much, thomas
[23:17] <ohitsmax> oh my god bob
[23:17] <autarch> wait, you don't get why he's mad?
[23:17] <besoin> i'm sure that's totally intentional, bob
[23:17] <autarch> the lady is dead
[23:18] <besoin> this movie operates on that level
[23:18] <dan2> I get the reason the movie gives but it doesn't make much sense
[23:18] <autarch> she facked up
[23:18] <autarch> wait
[23:18] <autarch> CN\
[23:18] <autarch> was this filmed in canada?
[23:18] <dan2> it was filmed in Fuck City
[23:19] <besoin> i don't really get where this can go from here
[23:19] <kayke> it goes
[23:19] <besoin> well this is suspicious
[23:19] <autarch> montreal
[23:19] <kayke> she's very good at decisions
[23:20] <dan2> the still have to find Dennis Quaid hiding in their appartment
[23:20] <Amp> lol
[23:20] <dan2> blocking just the nipple is some high level stuff
[23:20] <Bob511> Pippa and Seb bond over a mutual interest in causing Julia's death.
[23:20] <ohitsmax> this director is going places
[23:21] <autarch> lol dan
[23:21] <besoin> pippa sucks
[23:21] <dan2> nippa
[23:21] <besoin> no nippa slippa from pippa
[23:21] <kayke> lol
[23:22] <kayke> welcome to the quiet bar
[23:22] <ohitsmax> all these expensive locations and imagery make me uncomfortable
[23:23] <besoin> this guy looks 14
[23:23] <Bob511> A what?
[23:23] <besoin> penicillin?
[23:23] <lhs> that's what the subs said
[23:23] <Bob511> That's what I heard, but...is that...?
[23:24] <lhs> https://www.liquor.com/recipes/penicillin/
[23:24] <ohitsmax> pets
[23:24] <Bob511> Yeah, I obviously do not know my cocktails.
[23:24] <Amp> millions of pets jerking right now
[23:24] <dan2> they have secret lives max
[23:24] <autarch> i don't watch porn
[23:24] <besoin> he will bate from time to time
[23:25] <dan2> this is his icebreaker?
[23:25] <dan2> vibratah
[23:25] <besoin> will brate
[23:25] <autarch> STD's mostly
[23:25] <besoin> he has a little hercules vibe to him
[23:25] <besoin> like he's a buff 14 year old
[23:25] <kayke> do vibrators dream of electric vag?
[23:25] <dan2> LISTEN HERE YOU WOMAN I MET 25 SECONDS AGO...
[23:25] <autarch> haha
[23:26] <besoin> christine and the queens?
[23:26] <kayke> he could be in twilight
[23:26] <lhs> atheist grey
[23:26] <autarch> lol
[23:27] <dan2> haha
[23:27] <Amp> i feel like i'm being held hostage
[23:27] <dan2> why didn't they make a movie out of this story?
[23:28] <kayke> if a person started telling me this at a bar I'd leave
[23:28] <besoin> is she trying to teach him a lesson about cheating
[23:28] <dan2> "You left out the part where he meets the ogre..."
[23:28] <autarch> I'd stay because I love stories
[23:28] == Trebbers [webchat@6ju5.73my.q3m5.ip] has quit [Ping timeout]
[23:28] <ohitsmax> oh pippa
[23:29] <besoin> why doesn't he keep his keys in his pocket
[23:29] <kayke> because he takes off his clothes so often
[23:29] <besoin> is her bf gonna see her
[23:29] <besoin> or i guess he's still off crying somewhere
[23:30] <lhs> i miss his voice
[23:30] <Amp> Pippa.... Peepa
[23:30] <dan2> that's why it's important to learn how to do it yourself
[23:30] <dan2> he's not always gonna be around
[23:30] <Amp> her hair looks like it always does
[23:30] <lhs> i can't go that deep
[23:31] <besoin> "it's cool, i was on euphoria"
[23:31] <kayke> "I see so many boopies I don't even give a shit"
[23:31] <Amp> kewt
[23:32] <besoin> they fooled us into watching a dov charney biopic
[23:32] <Amp> exquisitely sculpted
[23:33] <dan2> you know he's a pro because he has the loudest camera on the market
[23:33] <ohitsmax> you can't just
[23:33] <ohitsmax> oh forget it
[23:33] <Amp> lol
[23:33] <besoin> nude men ambushes always make women comfortable
[23:34] <dan2> "she also had boobs"
[23:34] <besoin> heh
[23:34] <Amp> "you remind me of my neighbor"
[23:34] <kayke> lol
[23:34] <Bob511> Ha
[23:34] <lhs> heh
[23:34] <autarch> dan lol
[23:35] <besoin> she's really teaching this guy a lesson
[23:35] <Amp> "can we close the curtains? no reason"
[23:35] <Bob511> You know, she obviously didn't have to get Julia to kill herself to sleep with this guy.
[23:35] <ohitsmax> haha
[23:35] <ohitsmax> this is so explicit
[23:35] <lhs> he's gonna charge her $200
[23:35] <ohitsmax> lmao
[23:35] <dan2> he sounds like he's breathing on her vag trying to fog it up
[23:36] <besoin> "a condom? to go down on you?"
[23:36] <dan2> 2021 and they still don't show weiner
[23:36] <ohitsmax> be brave. hang dong
[23:37] <ohitsmax> thats sex alright
[23:37] <besoin> what on earth will happen in the next 30 mins
[23:37] <dan2> so kayke why did your dad say he liked this so much?
[23:37] <Amp> lmao
[23:38] <kayke> lol
[23:38] <besoin> oh lord
[23:38] <Bob511> Aha
[23:38] <ohitsmax> ahaha
[23:38] <ohitsmax> of fucking course
[23:38] <kayke> listen, movies have sex in them, we're all adults here
[23:38] <besoin> if he has any integrity he won't notice her over there
[23:38] <Amp> "Ernie??"
[23:38] <Bob511> He just had to know how Curious tasted.
[23:39] <dan2> lol amp
[23:39] <besoin> maybe everyone should just break up
[23:40] <lhs> "pippa, why is my printer saying SLUT"
[23:40] <besoin> heh
[23:40] <dan2> lol
[23:40] <Bob511> Ha
[23:40] <kayke> artisanal glass legos
[23:40] <besoin> oh come on
[23:40] <ohitsmax> no way
[23:40] <lhs> no one else would ever accept his voice
[23:40] <lhs> he had to do it
[23:40] <ohitsmax> aw :(
[23:40] <Amp> hehe
[23:40] <besoin> you don't have to kill yourself because someone cheats on you, movie
[23:41] <besoin> this movie's real crime is under-utilizing mrs. kim
[23:41] <Amp> ::Twilight New Moon crying in chair time lapse::
[23:41] <dan2> I'll be honest I thought thought Sebastian killed his gf
[23:42] <besoin> seemed like a possibility
[23:42] <dan2> it's a dark day in Fuck City
[23:43] <kayke> you do not need to gas her up over this
[23:43] <dan2> this friend and the friend from Unleashed should team up
[23:43] <besoin> a good person with bad eye makeup
[23:44] <kayke> this friend is supportive in a bad way
[23:44] <besoin> will her picture be there?
[23:44] <lhs> this friend is team jacobs
[23:45] <Bob511> An entire audience of people he harassed into sex.
[23:45] <ohitsmax> !!!!!
[23:45] <besoin> performance art, eh?
[23:45] <ohitsmax> LMAO
[23:46] <dan2> "I should also say that there are only 8 photos on display because of several dozen ongoing lawsuits..."
[23:46] <autarch> for my NEXT trick...
[23:46] <Amp> lmao
[23:46] <ohitsmax> fuck this movie
[23:46] <ohitsmax> omg
[23:46] <besoin> is the bf really dead?
[23:46] <autarch> cabin in the metropolitan area
[23:46] <ohitsmax> dead as hell im afraid
[23:46] <dan2> lol
[23:46] <besoin> wouldn't this be illegal?
[23:46] <ohitsmax> WE OWN?? WHAT?
[23:46] <Amp> "wow he airbrushed the hell out of me"
[23:46] <ohitsmax> what is HAPPENING
[23:47] <dan2> The Screwman Show
[23:47] <Bob511> Aha
[23:47] <lhs> haha
[23:47] <Amp> lol
[23:47] <dan2> hamburglar obsession
[23:47] <Amp> "unlike this"
[23:47] <kayke> I have to say this is a stupid fucking art show. it only works if you have the context of what they were seeing across the street
[23:47] <autarch> now THIS is art
[23:48] <dan2> they set up a months long con with dozens of actors just to get a pic of her boobs
[23:48] <ohitsmax> fdsajkl;
[23:48] <besoin> this is not even the only thing she's in where her nudes are weaponized
[23:48] <kayke> imagine being there at that show and just seeing two people become peeping toms and then one dies-- like what's the story
[23:48] <Bob511> You mean the Amazon Prime Original Movie The Voyeurs, dan?
[23:48] <ohitsmax> ahaha
[23:48] <dan2> heh
[23:49] <ohitsmax> imagine watching a movie where two people become peeping toms and then one dies-- like what's the story
[23:49] <besoin> what the hell is this
[23:49] <dan2> the heck
[23:49] <autarch> bob lol
[23:49] <ohitsmax> it's just one of those days
[23:49] <besoin> she should be on the phone with the police
[23:49] <dan2> I'd make the joke "this is the worst Black Mirror episode" but sadly it isn't
[23:49] <Amp> lol
[23:50] <ohitsmax> sting cannot help her
[23:50] <Amp> bewbs
[23:50] <besoin> i guess it really was corvid water
[23:50] <dan2> everyone got to see tits except her
[23:51] <ohitsmax> what the
[23:51] <besoin> obviously she should kill these two
[23:51] <dan2> The Happening
[23:51] <besoin> oh come on
[23:51] <kayke> this is a weird geiko commercial
[23:52] <Bob511> Heh
[23:52] <dan2> what the hell is going on
[23:52] <besoin> pepper and thomas
[23:52] <dan2> I did chune
[23:53] <dan2> arousing success
[23:53] <Amp> an ::arousing::
[23:53] <Amp> damn
[23:53] <autarch> what is he doing
[23:53] <besoin> is she poisoning them
[23:53] <Amp> Versayse
[23:53] <dan2> "LOVE their chocolate chip cookies"
[23:54] <besoin> she had julia sign a "you can poison us" release during her eye exam
[23:54] <autarch> yes
[23:54] <lhs> literal baby, we have to get over this
[23:54] <kayke> lol
[23:54] <dan2> lol bes
[23:54] <ohitsmax> lmao bes
[23:54] <besoin> she's uno reversing them
[23:54] <besoin> movie ends with HER being interviewed
[23:54] <ohitsmax> thats what should be on the printout
[23:54] <dan2> printouts of her ass are the only way she can fight back
[23:55] <besoin> "if you're reading this you give permission to be poisoned"
[23:55] <kayke> hacking
[23:55] <dan2> Alfred Pipscock
[23:55] <lhs> just leaving her laptop out in the elements like breen
[23:55] <ohitsmax> burner laptop
[23:55] <besoin> your laptop won't last long in a quebec winter night
[23:56] <kayke> she's gone full goblin
[23:56] <kayke> she cares not for laptops
[23:56] <autarch> if it's running hot, there's no better place to be, besoin
[23:56] <dan2> holy shit, the drinking bird might actually kill someone
[23:56] <besoin> why do they care what she's doing
[23:56] <dan2> you can do it movie
[23:56] <ohitsmax> i will forgive the movie if that happens
[23:57] <besoin> oh
[23:57] <besoin> this is idiotic
[23:57] <kayke> the drinking bird was symbolism for how birds drink sometimes
[23:57] <dan2> they don't do autopsies in Canada?
[23:57] <besoin> wouldn't the police check for corvid poisoning
[23:58] <dan2> I think the stuff inside the drinking bird that makes it tilt is actually poisinous
[23:58] <besoin> got em
[23:58] <ohitsmax> hell yeah
[23:58] <Bob511> Well-timed knockout drops.
[23:58] <besoin> couldn't he kill her really quick before he dies
[23:58] <autarch> hell fuckin yeah
[23:59] <besoin> now we have to find out the bf is still alive
[23:59] <lhs> she'd better dig him up quick then
[23:59] <Amp> AIRHORN
[23:59] <besoin> pretty dumb to bring your murder victims to your offiice
[23:59] <autarch> Peeping Destination
[23:59] <ohitsmax> wait
[23:59] <lhs> aaaaaaaaaaaa no thank you movie
[23:59] <ohitsmax> it's not murder
[23:59] <Amp> hehehehe
[23:59] <ohitsmax> oh my GOD
[00:00] <besoin> what the hell is this now
[00:00] <Amp> it's not murder if you can't eye-dentify the culprit
[00:00] <ohitsmax> EGG
[00:00] <autarch> wah wah wee wah
[00:00] <lhs> i'm covering my tv
[00:00] <dan2> zapping the naked lady laser pointer into their retinas
[00:00] <besoin> honey count: 1
[00:00] <dan2> haha
[00:00] <lhs> who's this new baby
[00:01] <besoin> so she just blinded them?
[00:01] <ohitsmax> face without an eyes
[00:01] <autarch> oh fuck
[00:01] <besoin> yeah
[00:01] <Amp> honestly exquisite
[00:01] <autarch> lol
[00:01] <dan2> dumbest thing I've ever seen maybe
[00:01] <ohitsmax> You Got Pippa'd
[00:01] <kayke> alright but catch this: WE WERE WATCHING
[00:01] <besoin> wouldn't they have turned her in?
[00:01] <kayke> did you get it
[00:01] <kayke> we watched it
[00:01] <besoin> or are they just like "fair play"
[00:01] <autarch> Dr Pippa, You make the world taste Bittah
[00:01] <dan2> 5 stars
[00:01] <Bob511> Can't believe she'd use her life's work for evil
[00:01] <Amp> lmao
[00:02] <dan2> David Grove Churchhill Viste
[00:02] <ohitsmax> i can't believe i have to put this on my letterboxd
[00:02] <Amp> lmao
[00:02] <autarch> Rhiannon Motter-Trotter?
[00:02] <besoin> people will do anything to get the quebec film production credit
[00:02] <dan2> that's the law
[00:02] <Amp> sorry not sorry
[00:02] <ohitsmax> i love you amp / everyone
[00:02] <Amp> logging this baby for the second time
[00:02] <dan2> Didace Grondin
[00:02] <Amp> i mean, this babe
[00:02] <lhs> what did you rate it
[00:03] <Bob511> Catullus fell asleep in the middle of this and I don't know exactly when or how I can explain the rest to her.
[00:03] <Amp> i'm bad at remembering to rate, but this is a 4.5
[00:03] <dan2> before or after the printer wars?
[00:03] <besoin> "Plot holes  There was no way that Seb and Julia could have known that Thomas would drink the juice."
[00:03] <Amp> hehehehe
[00:03] <lhs> the most VC andrews font
[00:04] <ohitsmax> he loves the juice
[00:04] <ohitsmax> he drank it in like 5 scenes
[00:04] <lhs> of course he would drink it, he was a curious guy
[00:04] <dan2> you need the juice to wash down the hamburgers
[00:04] <kayke> thomas's special juice
[00:04] <ohitsmax> this movie looked so expensive, i hope they don't make their money back
[00:04] <Amp> also, if this movie showed us anything it was that Thomas definitely wasn't thirsty
[00:04] <besoin> i think it was fine, really
[00:04] <dan2> you start out by stealing burgers, then before you know it you're blinding pornographers
[00:05] <autarch> face without eyes, more like
[00:05] <lhs> it's the best movie i've watched this week
[00:05] <dan2> wonder what she'll get up to in the sequel
[00:05] <besoin> the biggest credit craft services has ever gotten
[00:05] <kayke> maybe someone will record audio of her boobs and she'll deafen them
[00:05] <dan2> lol\
[00:05] <Amp> I hope this revives the big stupid erotic thriller genre
[00:05] <dan2> Judy Weech
[00:05] <ohitsmax> in an after credits scene, thomas' hand shoots up from his grave
[00:06] <besoin> sydney unit?
[00:06] <Bob511> She got her own unit?
[00:06] <Amp> lol
[00:06] <Amp> Drone was Thomas's unit
[00:06] <kayke> a little periscope pops up in front of his grave stone
[00:06] <ohitsmax> hehe
[00:06] <besoin> seriously, what the hell was that stuff thomas was drinking
[00:06] <besoin> cor...corfu water? what?
[00:06] <Bob511> A mocktail, it appears?
[00:07] <lhs> chlorophyll water
[00:07] <ohitsmax> Cornish game water
[00:07] <dan2> I had opened a bunch of Dennis Quaid wiki pages, so now seeing this https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d5/A_Dogs_Journey_Movie_Poster_Art.jpg in this moment is really killing me
[00:07] <besoin> what a dumb asshole
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Ampersand
 
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 29, 2021 8:28 am

TONIGHT
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 29, 2021 8:47 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
The Cell

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 29, 2021 9:00 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
The Cell

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 29, 2021 10:56 pm

Code: Select all
[22:15] <@Amp> 3
[22:15] <@Amp> 2
[22:15] <@Amp> 1
[22:16] <bs> whatever happened to tarsem
[22:16] <bince_besoin> mostly does commercials i guess
[22:16] <Bob511> Doing TV stuff?
[22:16] <dan2> he directed a Wizard of Oz miniseries on NBC about 5 years ago
[22:16] <dan2> I remember because I made the thread
[22:16] <celhs> besoin was telling me earlier that this was filmed mostly in san diego, bakersfield, and namibia
[22:16] <dan2> D'Nofrio played the Wizard
[22:16] <celhs> this looks like bakersfield
[22:16] <Bob511> And movies where Ben Kingsley takes over Ryan Reynolds body, I guess.
[22:16] <Trebbers> ahh
[22:17] <bince_besoin> i saw this in the theater and remember liking it
[22:17] <kayke> why'd she do that to the horse
[22:17] <dan2> Dune Norris
[22:17] <bince_besoin> do you think that's really jennifer lopez up there
[22:18] <Trebbers> 0%
[22:18] <celhs> i keep thinking that my firestick screensaver started up
[22:19] <bince_besoin> now that was bakersfield
[22:19] == autarch [webchat@cloak-b1ntmd72.hsd1.il.comcast.net] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:19] <autarch> TIME??
[22:19] <autarch> TIME??
[22:19] <dan2> 4:00 in 5
[22:19] <@Amp> 400
[22:19] <Trebbers> 4:00
[22:19] <dan2> 4:00
[22:19] <@Amp> 4:10
[22:19] <bince_besoin> does he mean brian molko from placebo
[22:19] <kayke> oh no
[22:19] <Bob511> Watching too much Buffy.
[22:20] <autarch> gimme 4:40
[22:20] <bince_besoin> wow, he got ahold of that tiktok filter everyone uses to look like shrek characters
[22:20] <autarch> gimme 4:40
[22:20] <autarch> gimme 4:40
[22:20] <dan2> 4:40
[22:20] <autarch> ty
[22:20] <kayke> slim jim suit
[22:20] <bince_besoin> same costume designer as coppola's dracula as you can probably see right now
[22:20] <autarch> holy shit
[22:20] <celhs> i was just about to say
[22:20] <dan2> Snap into a killer's brain
[22:20] <autarch> this movie was written by mark protosevich?
[22:20] <autarch> that's my friend's uncle
[22:20] <bince_besoin> he also wrote the screenplay for i am legend
[22:21] <autarch> yeah
[22:21] <bince_besoin> and the story for the first thor movie
[22:21] <autarch> and thor i think
[22:21] <autarch> and poseidon adventure maybe?
[22:21] <kayke> does he work at nintendo and tell you the cheat codes?
[22:21] <autarch> shut up kayke
[22:21] <kayke> oooooo
[22:21] <bince_besoin> he disavowed this movie
[22:22] <autarch> wait really?
[22:22] <bince_besoin> yes
[22:22] <autarch> lol
[22:23] <dan2> how did JLo get cast in this?
[22:23] <@Amp> she was cool
[22:24] <celhs> okay this is bakersfield for real
[22:24] <autarch> what's going on? i'm not following
[22:24] <bince_besoin> hot off of out of sight
[22:24] <Trebbers> Yeah, was on a hell of a run
[22:24] <bince_besoin> this is probably her third best movie after selena and out of sight
[22:24] <celhs> i guess that kid is comatose and can only be reached via whatever simulation they were in
[22:25] <celhs> my cat decided to lie on my chest though so i have to watch this with her head in the way
[22:27] <bince_besoin> "can you imagine his shock when he finds marc anthony"
[22:28] <dan2> JDro
[22:28] <@Amp> butt
[22:29] <bince_besoin> is your cat reacting to this cat, lhs
[22:29] <celhs> nope
[22:29] <autarch> forgot about how J-Lo's ass was such a huge deal
[22:29] <@Amp> hell yeah
[22:29] <autarch> fuckin waterbed?
[22:29] <bince_besoin> jlo is on one
[22:29] <celhs> is this liquid television
[22:29] <dan2> ha
[22:29] <autarch> what is that show?
[22:30] <@Amp> Fantastic Planet
[22:30] <bince_besoin> her sheets turned into the dunes y'all
[22:30] <autarch> ok it just transitioned into Flight of the Phoenix
[22:30] <@Amp> did your uncle friend write that one too
[22:30] <autarch> friend's uncle, amp. Friend's uncle.
[22:30] <@Amp> sorry sorry
[22:31] <autarch> did he have clam hands?
[22:31] <autarch> or fish hands?
[22:31] <dan2> squid hands
[22:31] <autarch> was he a cagot?
[22:31] <bince_besoin> this scene was cut from the us theatrical release
[22:31] <bince_besoin> they didn't think we could handle it
[22:31] <dan2> I handled it
[22:32] <dan2> and I think D'Onofrio did too
[22:32] <Trebbers> His 'Oh no' face
[22:32] <dan2> ah, Mr. Sickleman himself
[22:32] <Bob511> Only way to catch a Vince is with a Vince.
[22:32] <bince_besoin> dean norris went to harvard so he could play a bunch of cops
[22:32] <@Amp> lmao
[22:32] <autarch> is she psychic?
[22:33] <autarch> or are they brain-connected?
[22:33] <Trebbers> Why did they dress old cop like he's an extra in Chinatown?
[22:33] <kayke> ant mary
[22:33] <autarch> is this sci-fi or fantasy?
[22:34] <autarch> weird role role for vince
[22:34] <bince_besoin> he was consciously trying to break out of comedies
[22:34] <celhs> can't believe how beautiful this movie is and then we have to look at vince vaughn
[22:34] <kayke> i could go for some asprin and a pancake
[22:35] <dan2> you could crush it up and use it in place of powdered sugar
[22:35] <kayke> computer hat
[22:36] <dan2> I mean, who wouldn't though
[22:36] <autarch> is this around the time he was in that other movie?
[22:36] <autarch> where he was still skinny?
[22:37] <autarch> (vince)
[22:37] <kayke> she's gonna price label anyone who fucks with her
[22:37] <dan2> lol
[22:37] <dan2> you mean Fred Claus autarch?
[22:37] <dan2> because that was later
[22:37] <kayke> the albino dog is a criminal
[22:38] <dan2> and a lot of vince looking skinny in that was because Santa is so fat standing next to him
[22:38] <bince_besoin> do you have to use a cat to find a bad dog?
[22:38] <Trebbers> Feel like just saying the name Fred Claus in here is tempting fate
[22:39] <dan2> no thank you
[22:39] <autarch> DARE
[22:39] <autarch> i was thinking of swingers, dan
[22:39] <dan2> look, if that's what you're into I say go for it
[22:39] <bince_besoin> is that peter sarsgaard
[22:39] <bince_besoin> yes
[22:40] <autarch> dude looks like greg ostero
[22:40] <kayke> "an albino dog, perhaps?"
[22:40] <autarch> *sestero
[22:41] <autarch> damn, vince, get a longer tie
[22:41] <Trebbers> Calm down score
[22:41] <celhs> should we watch seven
[22:41] <Trebbers> Too good
[22:41] <bince_besoin> it's pronounced se7en
[22:42] <autarch> Phillip Seymour Offman?
[22:42] <bince_besoin> ironically, d'onofrio played thor in adventures in babysitting
[22:42] <autarch> the bathtub eats people
[22:43] <dan2> he really needs his sugar
[22:43] <autarch> that's just the sound in my head when i'm hungry
[22:44] <bince_besoin> it's nice to see our government being so effective
[22:44] <autarch> god this score is way too much
[22:44] <dan2> dibs on the dog when this guy goes to prison
[22:44] <bince_besoin> i hope someone put "didn't shoot the dog" in the goofs section
[22:44] <dan2> :(
[22:45] <autarch> oh come on, show his ass
[22:46] <bince_besoin> there's a store near union square that sells this stuff
[22:47] <bince_besoin> ann taylor petites will send someone to rescue their best customer
[22:47] <celhs> heh
[22:48] <autarch> bet she wishes he had some of that water right about now
[22:48] <kayke> you'd be surprised, but this was all actually the dog's idea
[22:48] <autarch> *she
[22:48] <bince_besoin> it's pruitt taylor vince or whatever
[22:48] <Trebbers> "These areas" *Points vaguely at xray
[22:48] <Bob511> That's....a weird virus.
[22:48] <dan2> "He jerked it _way_ too hard."
[22:49] <Bob511> Not really up on the word "never", huh?
[22:49] <autarch> he's permanently fried?
[22:49] <bince_besoin> "could he stay comatose in proximity to jennifer lopez's butt"
[22:49] <dan2> no, he's D'Nofriedo
[22:50] <bince_besoin> this building is a mies van der rohe in barcelona
[22:50] <bince_besoin> the exterior, that is
[22:50] <celhs> check all the toilet permits
[22:51] <dan2> not a fan of these extreme dunk tanks
[22:52] <bince_besoin> fantastic four easter egg
[22:53] <dan2> "What happened here?" *points at haircut*
[22:53] <autarch> bed Eggley?
[22:54] <Trebbers> Suits look like Twizzler Super Long Nibs
[22:54] <dan2> lol
[22:54] <autarch> lol
[22:54] <bince_besoin> chekhov's third neuro-synaptic trasnfer suitt
[22:54] <autarch> those things are really good
[22:55] <dan2> "We also built a rumble pak into her butt"
[22:55] <celhs> heh
[22:55] <Trebbers> So the breasts have to be perfectly contoured, but not the dong? Curious
[22:57] <dan2> alright, so we finally get to the part where she fights Freddy, right?
[22:57] <dan2> wow look at em go
[22:57] <autarch> if the ladybug lands face up he has to admit he loves his mother in law
[22:57] <autarch> damn this movie looks cool
[22:58] <dan2> I could watch that dog shake all do
[22:58] <dan2> *day
[22:58] <kayke> was it a two for one sale on horses in this movie?
[22:59] <kayke> not everyone has a brain horse
[22:59] <kayke> oh
[22:59] <kayke> hmm
[22:59] <autarch> uh
[22:59] <bince_besoin> poor kayke
[22:59] <dan2> he's fine
[23:00] <autarch> where are they?
[23:00] <celhs> damien horst
[23:00] <bince_besoin> bakersfield
[23:00] <dan2> oh man
[23:00] <dan2> lhs
[23:00] <autarch> is this what all slaughterhouses are like?
[23:00] <autarch> gotta say this rules
[23:00] <bince_besoin> is that homer
[23:01] <celhs> the downward spiral perm
[23:01] <dan2> Grimes is up
[23:01] <kayke> oh no he's doing some quay brothers shit in here
[23:02] <Bob511> With a little Albert Pyun.
[23:02] <dan2> fettucine hair
[23:02] <bince_besoin> she's still not using her safe word, huh?
[23:02] <autarch> i wish this is what the inside of my mind was like
[23:03] <dan2> would be cool is this bodybuilder lady and JLo secretly became best friends after this
[23:03] <celhs> what, full of issues with women?
[23:03] <bince_besoin> the bronx, dude, pay attention
[23:03] <dan2> "Where do you come from, cotton eyed Jlo?"
[23:04] <bince_besoin> "like people who read harry potter"
[23:04] <kayke> lol besoin
[23:05] <celhs> flush the water down the toilet
[23:07] <kayke> she should get in my noggin and see all the nacho fries I remember
[23:08] <bince_besoin> this is what upscale outdoor shopping centers look like now
[23:09] <bince_besoin> law & order: special vince unit
[23:09] <kayke> lol
[23:09] <kayke> the boy
[23:09] <kayke> brahms
[23:10] <Bob511> Don't remember this gross-ass Death Wish angle.
[23:12] <dan2> careful, if he eats the jerky suit that's $10,000,000 down the drain
[23:12] <kayke> she should go into the dogs mind, I bet he knows where the girl is
[23:12] <dan2> the dog's mind is probably a lot chiller
[23:12] <dan2> less tortured corpses of women, more big toilet bowls and squirrels
[23:13] <celhs> the dog imagines sandwiches getting sliced into pieces
[23:13] <kayke> willy wonka'd
[23:14] <dan2> Jenny in the Block
[23:14] <Trebbers> ah
[23:14] <celhs> heh
[23:15] <kayke> she needs to find the mitochondria, the powerhouse of the cell
[23:15] <dan2> lol
[23:17] <bince_besoin> young carl is the kid from lizzie mcguire
[23:17] <dan2> eel is an underutilized animal for flim
[23:17] <bince_besoin> i've met that kid!
[23:18] <dan2> throw an eel at him!
[23:18] <kayke> I'd love a movie where this didn't happen
[23:18] <dan2> lil fuzzball
[23:19] <bince_besoin> this looks like losing my religion i feel
[23:19] <Trebbers> it does
[23:19] <dan2> hard to take D'onofrio seriously when his hair is https://www.throwbacks.com/content/images/2017/10/Untitled-design--17-.png
[23:21] <bince_besoin> zzz
[23:22] <Bob511> Can we take D'Onofrio seriously now?
[23:23] <dan2> this counts as a goat
[23:23] <dan2> the streak continues
[23:23] <bince_besoin> not with that dandruff
[23:24] <kayke> we gotta send in the dog
[23:24] <dan2> time to enter the Digiverse
[23:24] <bince_besoin> is this the michael scott paper company
[23:24] <autarch> No. Vince. Don't you DARE make this movie even more epic
[23:24] <dan2> how did D'Onofrio's character even afford to set all this up? did he have a job?
[23:25] <kayke> he also bought a rare dog from a breeder
[23:25] <dan2> guy owns 2 silos, I don't even own 1
[23:25] <bince_besoin> we're in luck, the third suit is 6'3''
[23:26] <dan2> they used all the horse meat to make Vince's suit
[23:26] <celhs> heh
[23:26] <kayke> do they need the suit? it's unclear to me how much of this is for show
[23:26] <Bob511> The rare Vince in a Vince.
[23:26] <celhs> the suit is to remind you that you're in meatspace so you can come back
[23:26] <autarch> they're all in Bedazzled now
[23:27] <bince_besoin> "don't be fooled by the images carl's got, you're still jenny from the block"
[23:27] <dan2> lol
[23:27] <bince_besoin> the lawnofrio man
[23:27] <bince_besoin> wake up her laptop, quick!
[23:27] <autarch> my favorite screensaver
[23:28] <bince_besoin> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dawn_(painting)
[23:29] <bince_besoin> https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/a/ad/Odd_Nerdrum_Dawn.png
[23:30] <dan2> I thank you once again for your stream of factoids besoin
[23:30] <celhs> sick quake mask
[23:30] <kayke> oh she has fully bought into it
[23:30] <dan2> what if she just went back to this look right now
[23:32] <kayke> she looks like an evil DDR character
[23:32] <bince_besoin> can't he push his hand button
[23:32] <dan2> she got married to the vulture while she was in here
[23:32] <bince_besoin> content warning here, guys
[23:32] <bince_besoin> gruesome body horror
[23:32] <dan2> is the vulure gonna be OK?
[23:32] <dan2> that's all I care about
[23:32] <kayke> I'm gonna cover my eyes
[23:32] <celhs> the unaired episode of pompidou
[23:32] <dan2> lmao
[23:33] <@Amp> hehe
[23:33] <autarch> ahahaha
[23:33] <bince_besoin> probably the best face jennifer lopez ever made
[23:33] <autarch> FUCK YOU
[23:34] <dan2> still 1,000x less troubling than anything in Burton's Alice in Wonderland
[23:34] <bince_besoin> "you were a fly girl on in living color!"
[23:34] <kayke> why did a baby have a car?
[23:34] <dan2> god I love vultures
[23:35] <kayke> "we're in the water temple"
[23:35] <celhs> "they have a sephora in here"
[23:35] <bince_besoin> "a cheesecake factory?"
[23:35] <autarch> twin peaks s3 theatre place
[23:37] <kayke> lol just prancing into the scene
[23:37] <Trebbers> Didn't know they were filming
[23:37] <celhs> you have to eat your way out of the suit
[23:37] <bince_besoin> all this stuff is on a timer?
[23:38] <dan2> meanwhile cops are hard at work just standing in front of the empty house
[23:38] <Trebbers> had to put a suit on before making that important call
[23:39] <autarch> lol bakersfield
[23:41] <kayke> access: dognied
[23:41] <Bob511> Oh no, the dog locked them out.
[23:41] <bince_besoin> she's going to show him mark anthony's balls
[23:41] <bince_besoin> *marc
[23:42] <kayke> in her mind she's a big vagina saint?
[23:42] <celhs> i'm so glad they bothered to drive two hours to bakersfield instead of trying to pass off some shitty part of LA
[23:43] <Bob511> They grow up so fast.
[23:43] <autarch> this border
[23:43] <dan2> Tarsem inventing the electronic greeting card template in front of our eyes
[23:43] <autarch> yeah lol
[23:43] <bince_besoin> should be an option on zoom
[23:44] <dan2> great night for critters I gotta say
[23:46] <bince_besoin> wailin' on sam goodbody
[23:46] <@Amp> bad night for nips
[23:47] <kayke> oh no
[23:47] <Trebbers> ewww
[23:47] <dan2> put some vasoline on that
[23:48] <bince_besoin> what
[23:48] <celhs> "me got boy. boy me got"
[23:48] <kayke> oh okay
[23:49] <kayke> sure
[23:49] <bince_besoin> what's in the booooxxx
[23:50] <dan2> now he decides to take it slow
[23:50] <celhs> "you can live rent free in my head"
[23:50] <dan2> haha
[23:51] <dan2> you have 4ft long legs dude, just kick it
[23:51] <dan2> I guess that works too
[23:52] <autarch> lol dan
[23:52] <kayke> is this crime?
[23:53] <celhs> so all the head stuff was pointless and they just had to track down where he bought his things
[23:53] <kayke> is she gonna get in trouble?
[23:53] <dan2> actual thought crimes
[23:54] <bince_besoin> that was a real torture method apparently
[23:55] <Bob511> Dog's a slip-and-fall money-making goldmine.
[23:55] <kayke> i like that car color
[23:55] <bince_besoin> another shitflick volvo
[23:56] <dan2> which it seemed like you basically did
[23:57] <autarch> this kid needs a makeover
[23:58] <autarch> dresses like it's fuckin 1942
[23:58] <autarch> good film
[23:58] <Trebbers> Young Mr Wilson
[23:58] <bince_besoin> i think that was pretty decent
[23:58] <dan2> 3 mothers?
[23:58] <Trebbers> fast creds
[23:58] <Trebbers> Skip Crank
[23:58] <@Amp> Skip Crank
[23:58] <dan2> am I wrong or are these credits wobbly as hell
[23:59] <autarch> Coomber
[23:59] <dan2> this is the most headache inducing effect in the whole movie
[23:59] <bince_besoin> they're wobbling
[23:59] <@Amp> owie
[23:59] <bince_besoin> this song is by the "Master Musiciens of Jajouka"
[23:59] <autarch> George Gugler
[23:59] <bince_besoin> well, the previous song
[00:00] <dan2> I actually can't watch them its making me ill
[00:00] <Trebbers> I have a CD of theirs
[00:00] <@Amp> RESIDENT EVIL on Sunday! see ya'll then! stay spooky!
[00:00] <Trebbers> Nonesuch put it out
[00:00] <autarch> i liked the movie
[00:00] <Trebbers> p twisted
[00:00] <autarch> "The Movie" was nice, and the detectives seem to have solved all their murders
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Ampersand
 
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 03, 2021 8:52 am

TONIGHT
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Ampersand
 
Posts: 13229
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:30 pm

Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 03, 2021 8:52 am

TONIGHT
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Ampersand
 
Posts: 13229
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:30 pm

Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 03, 2021 12:35 pm

bump!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 03, 2021 8:48 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
RESIDENT EVIL

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Oct 03, 2021 10:46 pm

Code: Select all
[22:13] <@Amp> 3
[22:13] <@Amp> 2
[22:13] <@Amp> 1
[22:14] <ohitsmax> i have not seen this since we went to it in the theater in highschool
[22:14] <code_besoinica> thank god, i don't have to read
[22:14] == autarch has changed nick to umbrellautarch
[22:14] <donnamavovivch> weirdly, i've seen some of the sequels (uclear which ones) but not this one
[22:15] <umbrellautarch> we're doing the whole series right?
[22:15] <Bob511> What's the profit margin on genetic experimentation?
[22:15] <xtn-virus> i just remember the ***** grid
[22:15] <donnamavovivch> are we also gonna play all of the video games?
[22:15] <code_besoinica> they filmed this in germany for some reason, iirc
[22:15] <lhs> is this going to be another soundtrack i need to download
[22:16] <dan2> on your resume for this job do you put that you're good at the crane game in the arcades?
[22:16] <ohitsmax> loving these coils
[22:16] <code_besoinica> welcome to wuhan
[22:16] <Trebbers> ahah the dry ice
[22:16] <kayke> uh oh
[22:16] <code_besoinica> agh, my pangolin cum!
[22:16] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:16] <@Amp> lol
[22:16] <donnamavovivch> oh no the poweraide spilled
[22:17] == umbrellautarch has changed nick to autarch
[22:17] <xtn-virus> chekhovs dog
[22:17] <kayke> when do we see the big titty vampire lady I've heard so much about?
[22:17] <code_besoinica> is this the same lab from gremlins 2
[22:17] <Trebbers> Lol
[22:18] <code_besoinica> bout to execute all these germans for posing as americans
[22:18] <xtn-virus> only hot early 30s scientists allowed
[22:18] <xtn-virus> smh
[22:19] <code_besoinica> meanwhile in the bud light lab
[22:19] <Bob511> Of course the Konami code doesn't work, idiot.
[22:19] <autarch> "I'LL FUCK THE DOORS!!"
[22:19] <code_besoinica> he hasn't had his coffee
[22:19] <lhs> the elevator is also a tanning booth
[22:19] <ohitsmax> don't lock me in an elevator until i've had my coffee
[22:20] <kayke> damn I love tower of terror
[22:20] <code_besoinica> is this like final destination, is it just coffee shirt's premonition?
[22:20] <xtn-virus> i dont really get the difference between an immediate stop on the 3rd floor and the ground
[22:20] <ohitsmax> i got locked in an elevator once but it wasnt as fun as they are making it look
[22:20] <xtn-virus> SPRRRRRIIIIING BREEEEAAAK
[22:20] <code_besoinica> i delivered mr. belding's wife's baby in an elevator
[22:21] <dan2> wait what
[22:21] <kayke> I also got locked in an elevator once. in college with my RA. he cried because a girl was being mean to him.
[22:21] <dan2> could we get a little more on that besoin
[22:21] <Trebbers> yes, please
[22:21] <code_besoinica> just a little saved by the bell reference, folks
[22:21] <xtn-virus> a building down the street from work had an eleveator break
[22:21] <xtn-virus> and someone got caught in it
[22:21] <donnamavovivch> i always had questions about how zach knew how to deliver a baby
[22:21] <xtn-virus> and the news described it as "if a grenade went off"
[22:21] <xtn-virus> and ive been scared of elevators since
[22:22] <code_besoinica> i had completely forgotten this portion of the movie
[22:22] <code_besoinica> took a lot of restraint not to have a heavy metal music cue there
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[22:22] <@Amp> a body in natural repose
[22:22] <kayke> homer simpson oxygen tent
[22:22] <autarch> can someone tell me what happened? I was making pasta
[22:23] <Bob511> Basically, the movie was, too.
[22:23] <Trebbers> Everybody at the office got fucked
[22:23] <lhs> elevator full of marinara
[22:24] <donnamavovivch> lady yelled that'sa spicy meatball! before she got beheaded
[22:24] <dan2> I think they're called herbs in this series lhs
[22:24] <Bob511> Isn't a very faithful adaptation if she can just instantly walk through doorways.
[22:24] <ohitsmax> lol
[22:24] <dan2> wait a minute I misread that
[22:24] <code_besoinica> are you guy's familiar with milla's hit single gentleman who fell?
[22:24] <dan2> long day
[22:24] <code_besoinica> i love milla
[22:24] <dan2> we were jamming to Milla's second album before you got in here
[22:25] <code_besoinica> oh, whoops
[22:25] <lhs> yeah, i was just thinking about how they showed the video on beavis and butthead
[22:25] <autarch> no way
[22:25] <code_besoinica> 45 mins of milla doing puzzles
[22:25] <Bob511> OK, the guns are locked.  Now go rotate a statue so a torn page from a book will fall out and tell you the combination.
[22:25] <xtn-virus> i think she's probably the most believable videogame character in a movie
[22:26] <autarch> can we press start to skip the cut scenes?
[22:28] <code_besoinica> forgot about mrod
[22:28] <Trebbers> aah what
[22:28] <autarch> oh shit
[22:28] <dan2> press X to BLOW
[22:28] <kayke> this is a lot and also not enough
[22:29] <xtn-virus> theres a good scene or two iirc
[22:29] <lhs> is this following the plot of the first game or just doing its own thing
[22:29] <xtn-virus> i feel like ill like this a lot more now than in 05
[22:29] <code_besoinica> doing its own thing
[22:30] <autarch> what's she doing?
[22:30] <kayke> get a headlamp
[22:30] <code_besoinica> did that RE game with the tall lady ever come out
[22:30] <code_besoinica> and if so was it any good
[22:30] <donnamavovivch> or at least a better flash light
[22:30] <ohitsmax> people liked it yea
[22:31] <xtn-virus> oh the newest one?
[22:31] <xtn-virus> yeah it seems worth checking out but ive never really played one and feel like i should do 2remake and 4
[22:32] <code_besoinica> it's mark antony
[22:34] <kayke> "we all work at dennys"
[22:35] <kayke> raccoon city, it's what we call the dumpsters behind the denny's
[22:35] <Bob511> Heh
[22:35] <autarch> what button do we press to pull up the map?
[22:35] <code_besoinica> primary effect of the gas is you show your nips
[22:36] <dan2> "we don't really test this stuff"
[22:38] <xtn-virus> god the cat wants me to watch from the cat bed so bad
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[22:39] <code_besoinica> thomas jane's dark twin here
[22:40] <code_besoinica> "The main actors were told to prepare for the film by getting copies of the games and playing them through. Some of them didn't know if they could complete them in time so they had to get video copies of other people beating the games and then watch it."
[22:40] <code_besoinica> the movie is staffed with posers
[22:40] <ohitsmax> haha
[22:40] <donnamavovivch> amazing, besoin
[22:40] <ohitsmax> please play and complete this game which we will be ignoring
[22:40] <code_besoinica> "some of the actors were given game genies"
[22:40] <lhs> and twitch was born
[22:42] <Bob511> What if the actors had to do all their blocking by either rotating or moving in a direction, but never both at once?
[22:43] <code_besoinica> this guy is always popping up in stuff
[22:43] <code_besoinica> the main swat guy
[22:44] <code_besoinica> i feel this is a reference to event horizon
[22:44] <autarch> just a normal room with normal lighting
[22:46] <code_besoinica> the mainframe, chester, the mainframe!
[22:46] <autarch> oh no
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[22:46] <Bob511> Should never have let ALICE watch Cube
[22:46] <autarch> oh no
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[22:47] <Trebbers> sike
[22:47] <xtn> Lasers rule
[22:47] <code_besoinica> this is like that episode of peep show. everyone is being sectioned.
[22:47] <dan2> haha
[22:47] <@Amp> Hypercube
[22:47] <xtn> Waffles
[22:47] <donnamavovivch> ahahahahhahaha
[22:47] <ohitsmax> wow
[22:47] <autarch> omg lol
[22:47] <autarch> just in time
[22:47] <code_besoinica> chick-fil-a'd
[22:47] <code_besoinica> brutal
[22:48] <xtn> Memorable scene
[22:48] <Bob511> Basically that scene and the dogs, yeah.
[22:48] <autarch> boo!
[22:49] <code_besoinica> i'm sure the IT guy will take care of this
[22:49] <ohitsmax> wheres the zombies
[22:49] <ohitsmax> cmon movie
[22:49] <code_besoinica> windows ce
[22:50] <dan2> "You're getting me right chuffed about now"
[22:50] <kayke> the programer's daughter was a dickensian ghost?
[22:50] <ohitsmax> wooopsie
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[22:52] <autarch> i'd watch a whole movie of laser scenes
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[22:53] <dan2> ewok noise
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[22:55] <code_besoinica> sounds like karens cutting in line
[22:55] <xtn_> hes russian
[22:56] <autarch> come on! make yoour way to the rendezvous point!
[22:56] <autarch> check your map if you have to!
[22:57] <dan2> so much valuable steam being lost
[22:57] <lhs> i haven't seen any typewriters around here
[22:58] <kayke> I don't want to see any more close ups of fingers please
[22:58] <autarch> if he doesn't get that code soon, he's gonna run out of lines of dialog
[22:59] <Trebbers> ahahha
[22:59] <autarch> 8675309
[22:59] <code_besoinica> he couldn't put the code in? huh?
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[22:59] <lhs> is this enough zombies, max
[22:59] <ohitsmax> GAME OVER
[22:59] <autarch> who just got punched
[22:59] <ohitsmax> i am satisfied yes
[22:59] <autarch> oh wow
[23:00] <ohitsmax> wow that cgi was bad
[23:00] <autarch> french tuck. nice.
[23:01] <kayke> you may ask yourself: how'd zombies get here?
[23:01] <donnamavovivch> love that mila was rocking the hi-lo skirt years before it was a thing
[23:01] <Bob511> Oh, no, zombie dogs.
[23:01] <Bob511> How do you handle zombie dogs, Milla?
[23:02] <kayke> this is the only part of this movie that i remember
[23:02] <ohitsmax> zomby woof
[23:02] <autarch> man's best friend
[23:02] <dan2> how'd they train this dog to not eat all the flank steak they glued to it?
[23:02] <autarch> yesss
[23:03] <code_besoinica> in the trivia it says they kept eating it, dan
[23:03] <dan2> oh good
[23:03] <lhs> heh
[23:03] <dan2> I'd of done the same thing
[23:03] <autarch> next flashback is gonna be like "you must kill the prime minister of malaysia!"
[23:03] <code_besoinica> not even zombie dogs can defeat doors
[23:04] <ohitsmax> the dog execution scene
[23:04] <xtn_> umbrella makes good guns
[23:04] <donnamavovivch> OH MY GOD
[23:04] <ohitsmax> aaaaaahaha
[23:04] <Bob511> Yes
[23:04] <autarch>  oh fuck yeah
[23:04] <ohitsmax> that was sick ok
[23:04] <Bob511> OK, movie's over.
[23:04] <autarch> this movie rules
[23:04] <dan2> honestly worth the price of admission]
[23:05] <code_besoinica> "jim...pam...?"
[23:05] <autarch> lol
[23:05] <ohitsmax> you found blue keycard
[23:05] <autarch> Boctor Lisa?
[23:05] <lhs> i'm still laughing about the dogs eating their meat outfits
[23:05] <xtn_> oh god
[23:06] <xtn_> is that joe jackson
[23:06] <donnamavovivch> lhs you gonna tag imdb with that?
[23:06] <code_besoinica> lisa is the lady alan rickman wanted to cheat with in love actually
[23:06] <Bob511> One of the most popular scenes in the film - when Alice runs up a wall and flings round to kick a zombie dog in the head - took 3 months of training for Milla Jovovich."
[23:06] <Bob511> Worth every minute of training.
[23:06] <autarch> you stuopid fuck
[23:06] <code_besoinica> i can kick a dog in a month flat
[23:07] <dan2> one good thing about that training is that you could potentially use it in real life though
[23:07] <xtn_> wait did she do a re2 movie too
[23:07] <dan2> I mean, hopefully it never comes to that
[23:07] <autarch> milla jovovich rules
[23:07] <dan2> Millas in all the REs, correct?
[23:07] <Bob511> Yes.
[23:07] <code_besoinica> milla does in fact like to get high and play video games
[23:08] <xtn_> she looks like a videogame character
[23:10] <code_besoinica> try the queen's gambit
[23:11] <dan2> The Hive - Hate to Say I Told You So
[23:11] <autarch> go
[23:12] <dan2> LEMME AT EM
[23:12] <code_besoinica> oh get outta here, kid
[23:13] <dan2> the need to poop and pee are just as primal as feeding though
[23:13] <donnamavovivch> yeah no one talks aobut that in zombie movies, dan
[23:15] <dan2> it's a shame because there's some rich storytelling possibilities
[23:15] <donnamavovivch> speaking of
[23:15] <Bob511> Well, behind you.  Right behind you.
[23:16] <ohitsmax> unsustainable levels of slo-mo being deployed
[23:16] <Bob511> "Get over here!", huh, Paul?
[23:16] <donnamavovivch> RIP IT guy
[23:16] <code_besoinica> hope they don't have any further IT needs
[23:17] <autarch> he's no superman
[23:17] <code_besoinica> i noticed that too, bob
[23:17] <code_besoinica> go. away. you're a zombie.
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[23:18] <kayke> the zombies should do a cheerleading pyramid
[23:18] <code_besoinica> they don't learn that move until world war z
[23:19] <autarch> michael showalter look alike
[23:21] <code_besoinica> kaplan logging out
[23:21] <donnamavovivch> lol
[23:21] <donnamavovivch> yeah it's cheat day so they gotta put in the effort
[23:21] <kayke> this movie loves showing fingers going through grates and I'm sick of it
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[23:22] <autarch> i for one can't get enough
[23:22] <code_besoinica> that thing looks like an extra from the fever for the flava video
[23:22] <ohitsmax> ahaha
[23:22] <@Amp> lol
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[23:24] <xtn-virus> you know its the real deal when they inject it w/ a twisty straw
[23:24] <dan3> zombunny
[23:24] <code_besoinica> james purefoy isn't doing too much here
[23:24] <kayke> blue raspberry for evil, green apple for good
[23:24] <ohitsmax> damn, water level
[23:25] <kayke> which nyc subway station is this
[23:25] <dan3> I call autarch the T-Virus
[23:25] <lhs> couldn't get the german club next door to turn it down while they were filming
[23:25] <kayke> lol dan
[23:26] <xtn-virus> i do like that they seem to have hired level designers as set designers
[23:26] <code_besoinica> it actually is a berlin ubahn station
[23:26] <autarch> lol dan
[23:26] <autarch> hahaa
[23:26] <code_besoinica> we need more movies about bringing corporations down
[23:26] <kayke> the scene in ghost ship is cooler
[23:27] <code_besoinica> kick him like a dog, milla
[23:27] <donnamavovivch> why, after all this, would defend umbrella corp
[23:28] <autarch> "we worked for the same company"
[23:28] <donnamavovivch> and in the end, it doesn't even matter
[23:29] <kayke> computa
[23:29] <code_besoinica> how did milla not get a kick in there
[23:29] <lhs> her boots are too full of water
[23:30] <kayke> if she had to train for months to kick a dog, it'll take years before she's ready to kick a human
[23:30] <dan3> notty notty
[23:31] <xtn-virus> thats a licker
[23:31] <kayke> what did that little ghost of christmas past do?
[23:31] <code_besoinica> look out, he's got the fever for the flava
[23:31] <dan3> let there be carnage
[23:31] <donnamavovivch> oh no the human muscle diagram from my text books killed him
[23:31] <dan3> "produced by spilling the T, sis"
[23:31] <code_besoinica> sam goodbody lost his danged mind
[23:31] <autarch> pokemon evolution music
[23:31] <@Amp> lol
[23:31] <kayke> it looks like someone skinned a butt ugly martian
[23:31] <Bob511> Ha
[23:33] <autarch> why is the computer doing that
[23:33] <dan3> she's being a real git
[23:33] <autarch> why would you program a computer to be mean?
[23:33] <kayke> a right little wanker
[23:34] <xtn-virus> this is why i hate kids
[23:34] <dan3> I shall cut the ghost child in two, and each shall get half
[23:34] <code_besoinica> this is walking dead level nonsense
[23:35] <ohitsmax> 4 on the floor
[23:35] <donnamavovivch> they are never ever getting back together
[23:36] <kayke> do you have to hold it level or are the levels decorative?
[23:36] <code_besoinica> beep bop boop
[23:36] <donnamavovivch> i love the edm train
[23:36] <code_besoinica> run milla run
[23:37] <autarch> if that's the case, then this won't be a very good movie
[23:38] <autarch> ah fuck
[23:38] <autarch> it's a dang grizzly
[23:38] <ohitsmax> boss battle
[23:38] <donnamavovivch> well, that was a waste fo the antidote
[23:39] <autarch> "any faster and we're gonna be going off the rails!" "just like a crazy train. DAMN IT!"
[23:39] <dan3> well, he ate fresh on this subway
[23:39] <xtn-virus> this is one of the better videogame movies probably
[23:39] <autarch> is its tongue a fruit rollup?
[23:39] <kayke> chekov's pipe hammock 
[23:39] <code_besoinica> until they make the bionic commando movie
[23:40] <xtn-virus> like that the movie has qtes
[23:40] <ohitsmax> lmao
[23:40] <autarch> ahahaha
[23:40] <autarch> incredible death
[23:41] <code_besoinica> thanks for riding amtrak
[23:41] <dan3> someone should put that behind their car with a JUST MARRIED sign
[23:41] <xtn-virus> is racoon city based on a us cirt
[23:41] <xtn-virus> city
[23:42] <dan3> It's based on Opossum City
[23:42] <autarch> yeah, it's based on Racoon City, TX
[23:42] <xtn-virus> Raccoon City (ラクーン市シティ?) was a small, industrialized city located in Arklay County, an isolated mountain county in the Midwestern United States. It was destroyed during the t-Virus outbreak in 1998. At present, the area is cordoned off to the rest of the world by a U.S. government facility.
[23:42] <xtn-virus> madison?
[23:43] <xtn-virus> too small. who knows. denver? nothing i guess
[23:43] <code_besoinica> she beat up like 800 zombies
[23:43] <code_besoinica> i think she can take these goons
[23:43] <donnamavovivch> yeah just spin wall kick them like the dog
[23:44] <code_besoinica> "IF she has insurance"
[23:44] <xtn-virus> we used to buy dvds of electronica videos like this
[23:44] <autarch> a mountain county? in the midwestern united states?
[23:44] <code_besoinica> nice of them to give her this napkin to wear
[23:44] <autarch> i guess if you consider missouri the midwest, then the ozarks are the only option
[23:44] <xtn-virus> i know
[23:44] <dan3> whoa
[23:44] <xtn-virus> it's hard to figure out
[23:45] <donnamavovivch> she couldn't even have a gown?
[23:45] <kayke> she's just got on two of those dentist bibs
[23:45] <@Amp> she can have two napkin
[23:45] <xtn-virus> denver isnt midwest but population wise its the closest i can think of
[23:45] <code_besoinica> i wonder if anyone has worn this for halloween
[23:45] <donnamavovivch> i'm sure someone has gone as slutty resident evil
[23:46] <code_besoinica> is this how card scanners work
[23:46] <donnamavovivch> yes
[23:46] <code_besoinica> the problem with the premise of this movie is that it assumes people would care if a virus killed a bunch of people
[23:46] <@Amp> heh
[23:46] <xtn-virus> IM THE FIRESTARTER. TWISTED FIRESTARTER
[23:47] <ohitsmax> fuck
[23:47] <donnamavovivch> lol
[23:47] <lhs> 28 saves later
[23:47] <dan3> that napkin is gonna get so dirty
[23:47] <code_besoinica> heh
[23:47] <autarch> 28 games later
[23:47] <xtn-virus> is it two then with the nemesis guy or w/e?
[23:47] <donnamavovivch> good thing it's brawny
[23:48] <code_besoinica> hello toronto
[23:48] <ohitsmax> YESSSSS
[23:48] <xtn-virus> GGs
[23:48] <Bob511> Gotta admit, more local news needs to be raccoon-centric.
[23:48] <autarch> fuckin awesome
[23:48] <ohitsmax> this end credits song is more exciting than the 90 minutes preceding
[23:48] <autarch> not true
[23:48] <donnamavovivch> i would enjoy a all racoon news network
[23:48] <autarch> that dog kick was legendary
[23:49] <dan3> IM TURNING IT AROUND LIKE A KNIFE ON THE SHELF
[23:49] <@Amp> fever for the flava
[23:49] <Bob511> A Marco Beltrami and Marilyn Manson pairing
[23:50] <donnamavovivch> jurgen sucker
[23:50] <code_besoinica> this has to have the most umlauts of any hollywood movie
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