HPN Movie Series: MY DAUGHTER'S RANSOM, Sun @ 22 E

Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
Courtney Love, and Marilyn Manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in

Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 02, 2020 7:29 pm

1.5 hours until we hit the runway!!
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 02, 2020 8:48 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
Deadly Runway

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Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 02, 2020 9:01 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
Deadly Runway

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 02, 2020 10:43 pm

Code: Select all
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 3
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 2
[22:14] <autarch> yes
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 1
[22:14] <autarch> yes!
[22:14] <deadly_yeoman> oh yes
[22:14] <impdentist> what city is this
[22:14] <danly_runway> Dark mode?
[22:14] <besoin> is that radio rebel
[22:14] <deadly_yeoman> Dallas
[22:14] <impdentist> and why are they listening to sitney brears
[22:14] <Trebbers> woooo!
[22:14] <autarch> oh nice. i love this haagen dasz commercial
[22:14] <besoin> are they saying dark sex
[22:15] <Trebbers> I think they are
[22:15] <autarch> yessss
[22:15] <besoin> pretty sure that's radio rebel
[22:15] <Trebbers> 0-100mph
[22:15] == kayke [webchat@cloak-1der3hh7.dyn.optonline.net] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:15] <danly_runway> I like to think a a random woman walked in off the street to caress the models
[22:15] <besoin> kayke you missed radio rebel
[22:15] <autarch> hell yeah
[22:15] <Trebbers> Previously on Fatal Fashion
[22:15] <deadly_yeoman> 0 - 100 mph - ?
[22:15] <kayke> Oh I'm watching I just didn't log on yet
[22:15] <deadly_yeoman> Rivers Cuomo: Back to Harvard
[22:15] <Trebbers> Just that it's getting right to it
[22:16] <danly_runway> the shorts
[22:16] <autarch> holy shit
[22:16] <danly_runway> already losing it
[22:16] <autarch> this guy is greasy as all hell
[22:16] <besoin> it's jamie luner from just the ten of us
[22:16] <impdentist> this is the tamest bullying i think i've ever seen
[22:16] <kayke> this is like a rare case of a hot person they put glasses on to make "ugly" that's a dude
[22:16] <Trebbers> Elective Fair?
[22:16] <deadly_yeoman> they're social distancing!
[22:16] <besoin> dephen storff
[22:17] <kayke> a male princess diaries
[22:17] <Trebbers> Only electives were shop and sports at my school
[22:17] <impdentist> the standards for getting a teaching cert are woefully lax in california
[22:17] <deadly_yeoman> lol dentist
[22:17] <besoin> hia thermopolis
[22:17] <Trebbers> ROASTED
[22:17] <autarch> got him
[22:17] <danly_runway> put DOWN
[22:17] <kayke> their college is a parking garage
[22:17] <autarch> this is an episode of america's next top photographer
[22:17] <danly_runway> see this is how you do it, 3 minutes and all the setup is done
[22:18] <impdentist> yeah we're already deep in it
[22:18] <besoin> they can't help it -- the music is driving them forward
[22:18] <besoin> feel like i'm in a sunset level in gran turismo 2
[22:18] <autarch> this rules
[22:18] <deadly_yeoman> wild energy
[22:18] <autarch> the teacher just let her be a total asshole there?
[22:19] <kayke> this is an entire season of riverdale in 5 minutes
[22:19] <Trebbers> Oh lord two different plaids
[22:19] <autarch> "Staley Doolittle"?
[22:19] <impdentist> "well sorry, this is mostly about the fashion"
[22:19] <Trebbers> Camers
[22:19] <deadly_yeoman> *Requiem for Doolittle plays*
[22:19] <danly_runway> eating MY grapes
[22:19] <danly_runway> I think that might have been the funniest line I've ever heard
[22:19] <Trebbers> Young Moose
[22:20] <deadly_yeoman> is this what mom thought high school was like
[22:20] <besoin> the main lady looks like tiffany. like i think we're alone now tiffany.
[22:20] <kayke> bold that they're pulling two princess diaries in one movie
[22:20] <autarch> Napoleon tnt
[22:20] <Trebbers> ha
[22:21] <kayke> like these nerds just need to comb their freakin hair
[22:21] <impdentist> oh no, polish?
[22:21] <impdentist> it's one of *those* photo shoots?
[22:21] <lhs> a little polish and a lot of photoshop
[22:21] <besoin> i think that would have to be a love potion no. 9, kayke. the only movie i can think of where they both blossom into heart throbs.
[22:21] <autarch> hell yeah
[22:21] <Trebbers> uh
[22:21] <danly_runway> whoa whoa
[22:21] <autarch> well hold on
[22:21] <autarch> the teacher can't be in there with him
[22:21] <Trebbers> Crimes already underway
[22:21] <besoin> river tucson
[22:21] <autarch> what is she DOING
[22:21] <deadly_yeoman> ah I was wondering if that was like fake acne on him
[22:21] <impdentist> see this is what i'm saying
[22:21] <lhs> i missed the first part, but this is college, right?
[22:22] <autarch> wait he looks worse now
[22:22] <Trebbers> Oh hell no
[22:22] <impdentist> i'm pretty sure it's high school
[22:22] <kayke> instant skin care
[22:22] <Trebbers> we in statch city
[22:22] <autarch> he WAS a hot nerd, but now he's a fucking camo-obsessed maga head
[22:22] <danly_runway> calm down lady they're just clothes
[22:22] <Bob511> Still less creepy than She's All That.
[22:22] <besoin> no dick silhouette?
[22:22] <impdentist> yeah that's exactly right aut
[22:22] <deadly_yeoman> [anime glasses guy meme] "Is This Twilight?"
[22:22] <kayke> he looks like the joker from gotham
[22:23] <lhs> gaslighting you
[22:23] <kayke> ew don't tough his back fuzz
[22:23] <@Ampersand> stroke his back hair
[22:23] <kayke> *touch
[22:23] <impdentist> "please stop breathing like that, mrs. whatever"
[22:23] <Trebbers> uh
[22:23] <deadly_yeoman> ripped from the amateur erotic fiction archives
[22:23] <autarch> this movie is brutal
[22:23] <kayke> I thought he was modeling clothes
[22:23] <danly_runway> 9 minutes in
[22:23] <besoin> this is a tiktok now
[22:24] <danly_runway> most movies this would be like the 40 minute mark
[22:24] <deadly_yeoman> "I work at Start Trek now"
[22:24] <kayke> love their single glass bowl
[22:24] <danly_runway> that happened in a day??
[22:24] <autarch> Lifetime Lifetime Beane
[22:24] <Trebbers> bwatever
[22:24] <impdentist> lol
[22:24] <lhs> heh
[22:24] <impdentist> sheesh
[22:25] <deadly_yeoman> oh no
[22:25] <danly_runway> the slideshow
[22:25] <impdentist> is this how photographers look at their shots, on a slideshow on their tv across the room
[22:25] <deadly_yeoman> me when I watch Tales From the Loop
[22:25] <besoin> uh oh
[22:25] <danly_runway> Rob Thomas - Unsmooth
[22:25] <Trebbers> too far
[22:25] <autarch> alright lady
[22:25] <Trebbers> ah dan
[22:25] <deadly_yeoman> lol dan
[22:25] <kayke> lol dan
[22:25] <deadly_yeoman> Bar Low Santana
[22:25] <autarch> lol dan
[22:25] <impdentist> ha
[22:25] <danly_runway> *fade to one of him wearing big fuzzy Dr. Seuss hat*
[22:26] <Trebbers> When the song finishes before you do
[22:26] <deadly_yeoman> ruthless dan
[22:26] <Trebbers> ahha
[22:26] <impdentist> wow they got that magazine published fast
[22:26] <deadly_yeoman> it's Higgins' zine
[22:26] <impdentist> a what?
[22:26] <kayke> usually a nerdy teen can only get this speedy of a glow up if they're bit by a radioactive spider
[22:26] <Trebbers> A blowtard?
[22:26] <autarch> blowtard??
[22:26] <danly_runway> it's a Blow Pop with a Sweetart center
[22:27] <Bob511> "It's on a rooftop...."
[22:27] <impdentist> if this guy has seen a single teen movie he should know this is a trap
[22:27] <deadly_yeoman> Gary Catherine Gallagher
[22:27] <lhs> he'll be busy serving food
[22:27] <autarch>  woah woah woah david
[22:27] <kayke> empty back pack
[22:27] <Trebbers> Is there computer smoothing on his close ups
[22:27] <danly_runway> Peter Park...oh wait I can't switch letters on that one
[22:28] <impdentist> is this above board with the school
[22:28] <impdentist> like is she allowed to be profiting off her students
[22:28] <autarch> "I should be thanking YOU; I'm the one who got paid"
[22:28] <Trebbers> 14 minutes in
[22:28] <danly_runway> her GAME
[22:28] <deadly_yeoman> are they film filtering him right now
[22:28] <Trebbers> yeah, so weird
[22:28] <deadly_yeoman> *credits*
[22:29] <impdentist> we've already seen her murder eyes twice and it's less than 15 min in
[22:29] <danly_runway> soundtrack is freaking extra on this one
[22:29] <autarch> I love the soundtrack on this movie
[22:29] <autarch> yeah, dan was just thinking that
[22:29] <impdentist> amazing
[22:29] <Trebbers> ahahah
[22:29] <autarch> lol
[22:29] <Trebbers> the origin of madness
[22:29] <autarch> omg this shot
[22:29] <danly_runway> don't Dub and drive
[22:30] <impdentist> did she frame the picture she took of him seconds before his death
[22:30] <kayke> britney and her empty ass backpack
[22:30] <impdentist> yes, it's spanish for "magazine"
[22:30] <danly_runway> THE magazine?
[22:30] <danly_runway> dammit
[22:30] <Bob511> "L Magazine, that's right."
[22:30] <autarch> this whole movie is predicated on the idea that everyone wants to look like they're in an acura commercial.
[22:30] <impdentist> and sound
[22:30] <autarch> yeah, true
[22:30] <lhs> is this actually oxygen network? seems too low budget for lifetime
[22:30] <danly_runway> Stepladder chic
[22:31] <autarch> New York Models is one of my favorite bands
[22:31] <Bob511> "Can you stand...on the top step?"
[22:31] <impdentist> what is this a photo shoot for
[22:31] <danly_runway> Home Depot catalog
[22:31] <impdentist> ha
[22:32] <deadly_yeoman> I want them to form a coven
[22:32] <deadly_yeoman> orrrr Bob called it
[22:32] <besoin> yeah, was hoping for an alliance
[22:32] <Bob511> Oh my god
[22:32] <Trebbers> The Pit was more subtle
[22:32] <Trebbers> ahahhaha
[22:32] <autarch> she's good
[22:32] <danly_runway> oh man
[22:32] <deadly_yeoman> ooh they got HEALTH
[22:32] <Trebbers> "pretty"
[22:33] <autarch> please don't be sad david
[22:33] <impdentist> "i really wish we had boned"
[22:33] <kayke> leave your dead girlfriend the cheapest teddybear money can buy
[22:33] <deadly_yeoman> weird community college funereal rituals
[22:33] <autarch> everyone in this movie looks like they might go to church
[22:33] <danly_runway> did your people's schools have a couch tree?
[22:33] <besoin> the shrine in the student union
[22:34] <autarch> i thought it was a high school
[22:34] <deadly_yeoman> I think it can be both
[22:34] <impdentist> what was that face
[22:34] <besoin> why is she opening his mail
[22:34] <autarch> not so good. my date died.
[22:34] <Bob511> His mother Eliza never wanted this makeover lifestyle for her son.
[22:34] <impdentist> haha
[22:34] <impdentist> oh god that's what it's referencing isn't it
[22:35] <kayke> it's like an iCarly high school where you just get to follow your passions all day
[22:35] <@Ampersand> that's why i call them fine-ances
[22:35] <deadly_yeoman> lol
[22:35] <impdentist> the deadbeat husband is the indication that the mom is the audience surrogate/only reasonable character
[22:35] <Bob511> Oh shit it is.
[22:35] <Bob511> Ms. Higgins
[22:35] <Bob511> I'm so slow.
[22:35] <impdentist> oh FUCK
[22:35] <deadly_yeoman> Mom works in HR
[22:35] <danly_runway> oh my god bob
[22:35] <impdentist> god damn it
[22:36] <besoin> my fair david
[22:36] <kayke> "I'm 15! I can have an affair with the teacher if I feel like it! Jeez!"
[22:36] <impdentist> yeah ok this is for sure illegal
[22:37] <autarch> model on the left is somewhat drunk i think.
[22:37] <danly_runway> can't wait for bomber jackets to finally come back into style
[22:37] <impdentist> "oh hills huh? perfect, easy to push you off of"
[22:37] <Trebbers> Is this lady also on the prowl
[22:37] <autarch> lol imp
[22:38] <deadly_yeoman> that filter they've got on his closeups is amazing
[22:38] <Trebbers> He looks like a cut scene character
[22:38] <kayke> lol
[22:38] <danly_runway> its like the henry cavill moustache filter
[22:38] <deadly_yeoman> dare i ask
[22:39] <Trebbers> "She'll never actually go through with having sex with you"
[22:39] <deadly_yeoman> i'll look it up
[22:39] <impdentist> well legally no
[22:39] <besoin> yeah, his signature isn't legally binding
[22:39] <danly_runway> expecially when its an "X"
[22:39] <impdentist> "my real name is henrietta but my friends call me jennifer"
[22:39] <kayke> arrested development voice: he was, in fact, a kid
[22:39] <autarch> will david turn out to be as dumb as the husband from deadly mile high club?
[22:40] <besoin> that guy will never be topped
[22:40] <Trebbers> Looking pretty good
[22:40] <danly_runway> turns out money IS good
[22:40] <kayke> is his contract binding if he's a minor?
[22:40] <besoin> nope
[22:40] <impdentist> yeah i feel like that's the answer right there
[22:40] <Trebbers> "What's this 'Sex Stuff' clause?"
[22:40] <impdentist> entertainment law?
[22:41] <kayke> boom goes the dynamite
[22:41] <besoin> adios andrea
[22:41] <autarch> god that camo shirt is bad
[22:41] <Trebbers> He has to model if mom signs
[22:41] <impdentist> top name
[22:41] <deadly_yeoman> millioners
[22:41] <danly_runway> America's Next Top Name
[22:41] <lhs> does the cameraperson have to pee
[22:41] <deadly_yeoman> lol lhs
[22:41] <danly_runway> (It's Jeff)
[22:41] <autarch> i heard that too, yeoman
[22:42] <Trebbers> Here we go
[22:42] <Bob511> Sometimes you can get a look at why they went with that filter.
[22:42] <deadly_yeoman> hope Andrea's house is ladder free
[22:42] <danly_runway> only thing getting signed is her death certificate
[22:43] <Trebbers> "Where do you keep your knives?"
[22:43] <danly_runway> I'm obsessed with his neck fuzz!
[22:43] <autarch> qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm
[22:44] <deadly_yeoman> a lot of trouble with syllables containting "r" in this cast
[22:44] <besoin> yuh oh
[22:44] <Trebbers> oh shit
[22:44] <deadly_yeoman> was it... last summer
[22:44] <autarch> I know what you did in college
[22:44] <danly_runway> Higgins: Origins
[22:44] <deadly_yeoman> ah dan
[22:44] <Trebbers> haahhaha
[22:44] <Trebbers> choke cam
[22:44] <kayke> rick her
[22:44] <kayke> *kick
[22:45] <impdentist> her hands were free the whole time?
[22:45] <autarch> she didn't even put up a good fight
[22:45] <Trebbers> ahahaha
[22:45] <deadly_yeoman> lol Andrea's torso still clearly breathing
[22:45] <autarch> honestly andrea deserved to die
[22:45] <autarch> omg
[22:45] <Trebbers> make it look good
[22:45] <autarch> stealing the clothing too
[22:45] <besoin> lord
[22:45] <impdentist> feel like if you always have this stuff handy in your car you've already made avery important lifestyle choice
[22:45] <Bob511> Was hoping she'd go for suicide again.
[22:45] <danly_runway> oh my godd
[22:45] <impdentist> BLACKS RULE
[22:45] <autarch> 54 st posses
[22:46] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:46] <autarch> 54 St Posses
[22:46] <Trebbers> Carve an 'O' in her forehead
[22:46] <danly_runway> please let the end be the 54 St. Posse coming in as deus ex machina
[22:46] <autarch> 54, saint posses
[22:46] <deadly_yeoman> I was just doing... not... much
[22:46] <Trebbers> Literally ghosted him
[22:46] <lhs> heh
[22:47] <autarch> i love that no characters are allowed to develop at all because the higgmeister just kills them
[22:47] <autarch> crap
[22:47] <autarch> TIME??
[22:47] <deadly_yeoman> 33:45 rn
[22:48] <danly_runway> 33:50
[22:48] <lhs> next target: mom
[22:48] <Trebbers> 34:00
[22:48] <deadly_yeoman> she was gaslighting him
[22:48] <autarch> ok, thx
[22:48] <autarch> wait, gimme 34:30
[22:48] <danly_runway> quick question...how many candy bars do people normally keep in their purse?
[22:48] <autarch> gimme 34:30
[22:48] <danly_runway> 3430
[22:48] <Trebbers> 34:30
[22:48] <deadly_yeoman> 34:30 now
[22:48] <autarch> ok good
[22:48] <autarch> thanks
[22:48] <impdentist> wait is the class putting on an actual fashion show
[22:48] <autarch> oh my god
[22:49] <autarch> jennifer does love fashion
[22:49] <@Ampersand> style for miles
[22:49] <deadly_yeoman> she's obviously a good teacher, why all the extra murder and gaslighting?
[22:49] <Trebbers> haahah
[22:49] <besoin> river flagstaff
[22:49] <kayke> that's how I dress to work from home
[22:49] <danly_runway> the mom clapping
[22:49] <impdentist> the "jack dawson"
[22:49] <deadly_yeoman> lol dentist
[22:49] <@Ampersand> lol imp
[22:50] <@Ampersand> "but could you maybe Dooless?"
[22:50] <kayke> go mom!
[22:50] <kayke> you're gonna die, but go!
[22:50] <Trebbers> waoh
[22:50] <impdentist> dream sequence
[22:50] <impdentist> come on y'all
[22:50] <Trebbers> booooo
[22:50] <autarch> lol
[22:50] <impdentist> it's like you've never seen a lifetime movie
[22:50] <Trebbers> Doug played me for a damn fool
[22:50] <autarch> choke her higgins
[22:51] <impdentist> what
[22:51] <danly_runway> extreme alpha move bullying a guy in front of his mom
[22:51] <deadly_yeoman> "he envies your closeup filter"
[22:51] <autarch> "you should try choking him to death"
[22:51] <impdentist> "it's apparently a new gang"
[22:51] <Trebbers> Decomposing!
[22:52] <deadly_yeoman> Higgins cast decompose on her
[22:52] <danly_runway> spray paint graffitti
[22:52] <impdentist> "oh, that's the rumor? ok, yeah"
[22:52] <Bob511> Her neighbors could smell her corpse from an entire mansion over?
[22:52] <deadly_yeoman> Kennedy III: Origins
[22:52] <kayke> i can't believe he's getting bullied by a guy who looks like he works at buzzfeed
[22:52] <autarch> get his as
[22:53] <impdentist> were those guys secret service?
[22:53] <danly_runway> lol yeoman
[22:53] <autarch> brooo
[22:53] <Trebbers> The nerds LOVE it
[22:53] <autarch> nice one duuude
[22:53] <deadly_yeoman> yeah that was a big hit with the Random 30 y-o Guy clique
[22:53] <autarch> what are those jeans
[22:53] <danly_runway> cool that the staff just lets students beat the hell out of each other
[22:53] <kayke> jizz jeans
[22:53] <deadly_yeoman> if it's part of following their dreams then yah dan
[22:53] <autarch> lol kayke
[22:53] <impdentist> YIKES
[22:53] <Trebbers> ohhhh
[22:53] <autarch> oh NOOOOO
[22:53] <deadly_yeoman> oh no
[22:54] <besoin> adios kaitlin
[22:54] <deadly_yeoman> don't you dare, budget Winona Ryder
[22:54] <danly_runway> Kaitlin rules
[22:54] <Trebbers> Dare Clanes
[22:54] <lhs> adios principal
[22:54] <@Ampersand> wow so many people she's going to have to kill now as each new person walks in
[22:54] <deadly_yeoman> oh sweet Caitlin
[22:55] <danly_runway> Kaitlin you get out of there RIGHT NOW
[22:55] <kayke> cait, she can put the filter on you
[22:55] <besoin> never in my 26 years have i thought of being a model
[22:55] <autarch> wait
[22:55] <deadly_yeoman> lol beso
[22:55] <Trebbers> ah
[22:55] <impdentist> the music begs to differ
[22:55] <Bob511> Aha
[22:55] <danly_runway> THATS JUST HOW YOU DO IT
[22:55] <danly_runway> WAVE YOUR HANDS AND PUSH IT
[22:55] <deadly_yeoman> Nadonna
[22:55] <besoin> gem and the reproductions
[22:55] <autarch> why is the soundtrack doing this? we know what her intentions are
[22:55] <impdentist> wave your hands and push it
[22:55] <Trebbers> what are these clothes
[22:55] <@Ampersand> PUSH IT
[22:55] <autarch> sounds of shitflixe
[22:55] <impdentist> this is like the same three outfits
[22:55] <lhs> it's just what's playing in the store, autarch
[22:55] <autarch> lol
[22:55] <deadly_yeoman> wow she really has that first date down
[22:56] <@Ampersand> Sounds of Fashion Vol. Infinity
[22:56] <deadly_yeoman> now I'm rooting for a third surprise makeover in this movie but who will it be
[22:56] <besoin> the glow up of doom
[22:56] <kayke> mom
[22:56] <impdentist> "ms higgins, i really need to get to class"
[22:56] <danly_runway> makeover for the principal
[22:56] <autarch> lol yeoman
[22:56] <besoin> "Ahh!"
[22:56] <Trebbers> Not going to be able to see the firefighters pole in the floor
[22:56] <autarch> bud light
[22:56] <Bob511> Going to push her to her death from all the way up on those shoes.
[22:56] <deadly_yeoman> lol bob
[22:57] <@Ampersand> yaaaaassss
[22:57] <Trebbers> Maybe some blackmail shit
[22:57] <besoin> oh lord
[22:57] <autarch> ms. higgins is me at the beginning of this movie
[22:57] <danly_runway> "
[22:57] <autarch> noooooooo
[22:57] <@Ampersand> like you're teasing some umpire
[22:57] <Trebbers> ahah
[22:57] <deadly_yeoman> heh
[22:57] <danly_runway> "Ok great, now put on this shirt that says '54 St. Posse'"
[22:57] <Trebbers> hahhahha
[22:57] <besoin> like you're teasing some vampire
[22:58] <autarch> nooooooo
[22:58] <Trebbers> Total tease
[22:58] <kayke> lol besoin
[22:58] <@Ampersand> thanks for the laughs
[22:58] <lhs> higgins shooting for yandy.com now
[22:58] <@Ampersand> he he he
[22:58] <impdentist> is she supposed to be drunk
[22:58] <kayke> I do not know where this is going
[22:58] <Trebbers> at least 3 beers
[22:58] <danly_runway> yes, the classic nightie+bat combo
[22:58] <deadly_yeoman> I hate to conjecture
[22:58] <autarch> i mean, i love baseball, but is the bat really a good prop for this?
[22:58] <@Ampersand> still the bat
[22:58] <deadly_yeoman> I'm just sort of glad that Kaitlyn is armed
[22:58] <lhs> heh
[22:59] <Trebbers> okkkkkayy
[22:59] <danly_runway> oKAAAY
[22:59] <kayke> is she going to photoshop the bat into a dick?
[22:59] <Trebbers> ahahh
[22:59] <kayke> and blackmail?
[22:59] <@Ampersand> too much Capri Sun
[22:59] <besoin> higgins has some guns
[22:59] <autarch> HEY!
[22:59] <impdentist> why being a GENTLEMAN matters
[22:59] <danly_runway> dying
[22:59] <autarch> health and love
[22:59] <Trebbers> "Gonna send em to my friend, Mr. Brazzers"
[23:00] <danly_runway> need to screencap so much in this
[23:00] <autarch> los angeles skyline
[23:00] <autarch> Hunter's Call
[23:00] <Trebbers> Hunter's Call
[23:00] <danly_runway> Ladies Daily
[23:00] <deadly_yeoman> I can't even
[23:00] <autarch> Ladies Daily?!
[23:00] <Trebbers> ahahah
[23:00] <autarch> a daily magazine?!
[23:00] <impdentist> wait is this actually happening
[23:00] <deadly_yeoman> why doesn't Higgins just get licensed or whatever as an agent?
[23:00] <kayke> wait omg
[23:00] <kayke> lmao
[23:00] <@Ampersand> okay then
[23:00] <deadly_yeoman> oh no
[23:00] <Trebbers> A house overfilled with 20 years of Ladie's Daily
[23:00] <autarch> coldplay back to the start
[23:00] <deadly_yeoman> poor Caitlin
[23:01] <impdentist> BOO
[23:01] <autarch> boo? i thought his name was david
[23:01] <danly_runway> uh oh
[23:01] <deadly_yeoman> Danger Things
[23:01] <impdentist> boolittle
[23:01] <Bob511> "Hey, Doo?"
[23:01] <danly_runway> here comes the DIED
[23:01] <kayke> step one: take a bunch of pictures of Cait with a baseball bat, step 2: get her a career in modeling, step 3: ???
[23:01] <Trebbers> Higgs you really screwed the pooch
[23:01] <lhs> heh dan
[23:01] <Trebbers> lolol his pants
[23:01] <danly_runway> I should sell that title to Lifetime
[23:01] <autarch> stable, because you have horse face
[23:02] <danly_runway> it was worth a shot
[23:02] <@Ampersand> excellent dudio
[23:02] <autarch> nice, dudio
[23:02] <autarch> dang it, amp
[23:02] <Trebbers> waoh
[23:02] <autarch> who IS this guy
[23:02] <danly_runway> Nick
[23:02] <kayke> porno nick
[23:02] <deadly_yeoman> Bloe Mangiamello
[23:02] <danly_runway> lol
[23:02] <lhs> a slab of beef
[23:02] <autarch> love this guy
[23:03] <besoin> she's gonna photoshop him with kaitlin eh
[23:03] <danly_runway> rip it
[23:03] <Trebbers> What an agreeable pervert
[23:03] <deadly_yeoman> Lifetime you dog!
[23:03] <autarch> great
[23:03] <autarch> oh my god
[23:03] <autarch> lol
[23:03] <@Ampersand> here take the bat
[23:03] <kayke> she should have him put on a baseball uniform
[23:03] <impdentist> "you want me to put it in my butt"
[23:03] <kayke> he doesn't get a hat?
[23:03] <autarch> really? that's the best you can do?
[23:03] <@Ampersand> imagination was pretty limited
[23:03] <Trebbers> ahahhaah
[23:03] <deadly_yeoman> I mean this is porno Nick we're talking about here
[23:04] <danly_runway> kayke was basically right
[23:04] <Trebbers> The long game
[23:04] <@Ampersand> 300% sure we're both hot???
[23:04] <deadly_yeoman> "am I doing... too little?"
[23:04] <autarch> a month ago they were total nerds
[23:04] <autarch> look at them now
[23:04] <autarch> they met at youth group
[23:04] <lhs> when did their relationship even develop, just because of the photoshoots?
[23:04] <danly_runway> Hallison Anigan
[23:04] <impdentist> "check out my ipad"
[23:04] <Trebbers> manwhore
[23:04] <deadly_yeoman> when you're in that many photos things are bound to develop, lhs
[23:05] <besoin> big deal
[23:05] <@Ampersand> erotic
[23:05] <danly_runway> Big League Screw
[23:05] <Bob511> Heh
[23:05] <@Ampersand> soft focus
[23:05] <deadly_yeoman> you can tell this is grandma fodder because of all of the ipads
[23:05] <Trebbers> Photoshopped holding a different bat
[23:05] <@Ampersand> yes, That Bitch
[23:05] <danly_runway> ahahah
[23:06] <danly_runway> the reaction
[23:06] <kayke> class is optional at this school
[23:06] <deadly_yeoman> yes Kaitlyn
[23:06] <Trebbers> "I did NOT have a series of mini strokes"
[23:06] <kayke> the only class anyone goes to is fashion class
[23:06] <@Ampersand> IN MY IRREPROACHABLE JOURNAL
[23:06] <lhs> real mormon definition of porn here
[23:06] <impdentist> photoshopped pictures of san diego
[23:06] <impdentist> lololol
[23:06] <Trebbers> Photoshopped friends
[23:06] <Trebbers> hahaah
[23:06] <autarch> here. a souvenier mug.
[23:06] <deadly_yeoman> they're here in this photo, just off frame
[23:06] <danly_runway> ahahhaha
[23:06] <impdentist> "they're just out of frame, laughing too"
[23:06] <@Ampersand> damn imp
[23:06] <Trebbers> Real life margs
[23:06] <impdentist> ah
[23:06] <@Ampersand> beat me
[23:06] <besoin> just call the police, man
[23:07] <danly_runway> Campbell loves this trick
[23:07] <danly_runway> the fake alibi
[23:07] <autarch> come on dog
[23:07] <impdentist> they have textbooks?
[23:07] <deadly_yeoman> the textbooks are fake too
[23:07] <besoin> can't help but notice this movie has 0 pink fedoras
[23:07] <autarch> those photos aren't that risque
[23:08] <impdentist> god the pink fedora
[23:08] <deadly_yeoman> lol what is this Plymouth?
[23:08] <impdentist> that really was an all timer
[23:08] <autarch> christ. need a pink fedora.
[23:08] <Bob511> A photoshoot so raunchy, they could only show it on basic cable.
[23:09] <impdentist> isn't there a fairly basic way to determine whether the picture is real
[23:09] <autarch> yeah....about that....
[23:09] <impdentist> she should have been fired months ago
[23:09] <impdentist> for stuff that she isn't even covering up
[23:09] <deadly_yeoman> just following the 45 playbook
[23:09] <autarch> wat
[23:10] <autarch> but he whooped tre's ass
[23:10] <danly_runway> that Nick dude's schlong must have been really something to get everyone this riled up
[23:10] <deadly_yeoman> ah at the Wheat Hills High Tree of Confession
[23:11] <impdentist> she hasn't!!
[23:11] <besoin> "i just keep photographing teens"
[23:11] <kayke> wouldn't the cops investigate porn of a minor
[23:11] <besoin> "i'm not gonna risk this $31K/year!"
[23:11] <autarch> roll credits
[23:12] <deadly_yeoman> please roll credits
[23:12] <Trebbers> One of the few non-Mom characters that's not an idiot
[23:12] <besoin> god, his face
[23:12] <deadly_yeoman> it's Caitlin, mom, and principal
[23:12] <danly_runway> you need to give her some advanced notice, Ladies Daily needs their new cover tonight for tomorrow's issue
[23:12] <autarch> it's been like 18 hours
[23:12] <impdentist> mods are asleep, post smooth david
[23:12] <autarch> kaitlyn the stone cold killer
[23:12] <deadly_yeoman> lol dentist
[23:13] <danly_runway> more like Datelyn
[23:13] <@Ampersand> caitlyn the betrayer
[23:13] <@Ampersand> like a friend with bennies
[23:13] <autarch> is he 18 yet?
[23:13] <danly_runway> what
[23:13] <Trebbers> Just turned
[23:13] <impdentist> what kind of establishment is this
[23:13] <@Ampersand> "You Got It!"
[23:14] <besoin> he looks like gage from pet sematary when they smooth him
[23:14] <danly_runway> she tries to sleep with him but he's become too smooth and keeps sliding off of him
[23:14] <autarch> wait
[23:14] <Trebbers> dan
[23:14] <deadly_yeoman> lol
[23:14] <impdentist> haha dan
[23:14] <deadly_yeoman> he's gonna slip off a ladder all by himself
[23:14] <lhs> heh
[23:14] <danly_runway> lol
[23:14] <Trebbers> "wait, what's this bat?"
[23:14] <deadly_yeoman> he's basically gonna go loko
[23:15] <@Ampersand> "we call it a Mudslide"
[23:15] <autarch> damn it. TIME??
[23:15] <deadly_yeoman> 1:01 just now
[23:15] <besoin> easy dave
[23:15] <autarch> ok
[23:15] <danly_runway> 1:01:15
[23:15] <impdentist> "to jennifer and david: two people who it would be illegal if they had sex"
[23:15] <autarch> what'd they toast to?
[23:15] <Trebbers> 1:01:30
[23:15] <deadly_yeoman> 1:01:30
[23:15] <autarch> thx
[23:15] <besoin> to weak chins and strong chins
[23:15] <deadly_yeoman> but maybe just don't, autarch
[23:16] <deadly_yeoman> we score with the score yet again
[23:16] <impdentist> yeah the music has been unreal
[23:16] <Trebbers> Why my guitar gently weeps midi remix
[23:16] <autarch> this is a hagen daaz commercial for sure
[23:16] <danly_runway> lmao treb
[23:16] <deadly_yeoman> aahhh treb
[23:16] <besoin> yowza
[23:16] <deadly_yeoman> hagen daas' infamously ill-fated "Back to School 1998" campaign
[23:17] <besoin> he just didn't go home, eh?
[23:17] <@Ampersand> kayke: "she's built like a fucking Pixar mom"
[23:17] <autarch> how can a photographer afford that place?
[23:17] <autarch> damn, lol treb
[23:17] <besoin> WHY ARE THEY SMOOTHING HIM
[23:17] <Bob511> Acne
[23:17] <deadly_yeoman> they could just like let him have acne
[23:17] <Bob511> Some of the shots, they have him just caked in makeup.
[23:18] <kayke> smooth everyone
[23:18] <Trebbers> College? I don't think so
[23:18] <besoin> they couldn't find a 24 year old without acne
[23:18] <Trebbers> smooth
[23:18] <autarch> wow
[23:18] <Bob511> You can't find this level of acting talent every day.
[23:19] <autarch> david's mom. kinda mean.
[23:19] <Trebbers> All the moms pumping their fists
[23:19] <deadly_yeoman> yeah that was total mom candy
[23:19] <Bob511> Mom goes to one side of the room, Jennifer to the other.
[23:19] <Trebbers> hahah
[23:19] <autarch> hahaha\
[23:19] <Trebbers> this music
[23:19] <impdentist> aw this is nice, it all worked out
[23:19] <deadly_yeoman> he's about to run out onto a football field and fistpump into the air
[23:20] <autarch> the music says zoey 101, but the visuals say wedding bells
[23:20] <kayke> I'm not about parents tracking their kid's phones, but someone needs to track this kid's phone
[23:20] <deadly_yeoman> ah here's the alliance we're hoping for
[23:21] <impdentist> loving lil' john legend here
[23:21] <lhs> i don't like how anti-glasses this movie is
[23:21] <deadly_yeoman> heh
[23:21] <impdentist> it's an organization?
[23:21] <deadly_yeoman> "it's called Scientology, and..."
[23:21] <besoin> jennifer walks like a dizzy cat
[23:21] <autarch> yes, falun gong is a worldwide organization
[23:22] <kayke> elastic waistband with a belt?
[23:22] <besoin> kait-bait
[23:22] <danly_runway> dumped her like a wad
[23:22] <deadly_yeoman> ok similes not Caitlyn's strong poitn
[23:22] <impdentist> ah yes, a wad of gum, that famous thing you dump
[23:23] <kayke> like a watto gum
[23:23] <Trebbers> ahah
[23:23] <deadly_yeoman> "uh she had panties on in those pictures, specifically"
[23:23] <autarch> yeah
[23:23] <besoin> not under the towel
[23:23] <deadly_yeoman> "like some...wad of gum"
[23:23] <autarch> fair
[23:23] <deadly_yeoman> you're right beso I'd already blocked that out
[23:23] <deadly_yeoman> bold move getting that close to his face filter
[23:24] <@Ampersand> lol
[23:24] <danly_runway> ghost noise?
[23:24] <kayke> research mom
[23:24] <danly_runway> "Sorry I can't hear you...you're dropping out like a wad of gum."
[23:24] <autarch> ah'
[23:24] <@Ampersand> a touch of the goog
[23:24] <deadly_yeoman> is mom going to invent evaluating an image to see if it's photoshopped
[23:24] <autarch> click search with the mouse
[23:24] <besoin> she'll probably just integrate into his face like the T-1000 at the end
[23:24] <deadly_yeoman> not that her son isn't always sort of photoshopped
[23:24] <autarch> don't worry about pressing the return button
[23:25] <Trebbers> His dad was a Sim
[23:25] <deadly_yeoman> lol dan's cell phone joke
[23:25] <deadly_yeoman> ahh Treb
[23:25] <lhs> when you type 2 wpm, hitting enter just takes too long
[23:25] <Bob511> Aw, you know it's true love when she wants to kiss him in the morning even before he's put his filter on.
[23:25] <deadly_yeoman> so sweet
[23:25] <impdentist> this outfit
[23:25] <@Ampersand> MAAAAA
[23:25] <deadly_yeoman> "about your outfit"
[23:25] <@Ampersand> so embarrassing
[23:26] <Trebbers> Tom Brady-esque nonsense fashion
[23:26] <autarch> YOU'VE ONLY MET ONE WOMAN!!!
[23:26] <kayke> lol
[23:26] <@Ampersand> ma she gives me filter
[23:26] <autarch> lol amp
[23:26] <autarch> lol treb
[23:26] <besoin> a knife isn't ballistic
[23:26] <lhs> a bathmat had to die for this project runway unconventional materials challenge
[23:26] <deadly_yeoman> hehehe
[23:26] <danly_runway> "You're conveniently leaving out the fact that she has sex with me."
[23:26] <deadly_yeoman> lol lhs
[23:27] <deadly_yeoman> to be fair it might've been one of those toilet lid coozies
[23:27] <Trebbers> ahahh
[23:27] <besoin> the outfits get worse and worse
[23:27] <autarch> dan
[23:27] <Trebbers> saving the best for the end of the movie
[23:27] <kayke> it's hard to be sexy in that outfit
[23:27] <impdentist> this is called "sexy joe pera"
[23:27] <danly_runway> WHERES THE DAMN SEXY
[23:27] <Trebbers> I think he's stuck on plastic
[23:27] <autarch> Then why is wearing lavender?
[23:28] <autarch> if you want dark and edgy, why is he wearing a lavender shirt with a cardigan?
[23:28] <besoin> "she IS mentally ill"
[23:28] <Trebbers> Yes!
[23:28] <kayke> they want dark sexy great british bake off contestant
[23:28] <Bob511> "esterdays"?
[23:28] <impdentist> who leaves those phone noises on
[23:28] <lhs> he's styled like the dad vampire in twilight
[23:28] <danly_runway> lol I was wondering about that bob
[23:28] <autarch> idiots, imp
[23:28] <besoin> do texts make the sent email noise
[23:28] <Trebbers> The moms that watch these leave the noises on
[23:29] <autarch> did the director tell kaitlyn to audibly sigh?
[23:29] <Trebbers> "Wheres your doo doo"
[23:29] <deadly_yeoman> "I let it mellow, OK?"
[23:29] <kayke> you didn't peepee because I didn't hear the potty!
[23:29] <danly_runway> wupwupwupwupwupwup
[23:29] <besoin> man, just tell her you're going out for starbucks
[23:29] <deadly_yeoman> I'm gonna just mince on outta here to this sick beat.
[23:29] <@Ampersand> i would wear his fit without question
[23:29] <impdentist> "i just want to finish building this building"
[23:29] <@Ampersand> well, not now. needed the cardigan
[23:29] <deadly_yeoman> heh dentist
[23:29] <lhs> "I know you didn't go to starbucks because i didn't hear the toilet flush!"
[23:30] <Trebbers> oh no
[23:30] <deadly_yeoman> oh boy
[23:30] <autarch> oh my god
[23:30] <besoin> taking his cardigans home
[23:30] <autarch> this is the first time she's been dramatic
[23:30] <Bob511> The dealbreaker was when it turned out she wasn't taking him on a trip.
[23:30] <Trebbers> want him to put on his outfit from the start of the movie before he leaves
[23:30] <danly_runway> careful dude, that was rick next to Rick's dong
[23:30] <Trebbers> ahha
[23:30] <deadly_yeoman> heh dan
[23:31] <Trebbers> Got dong dust on it
[23:31] <Bob511> Aluminum bat sound
[23:31] <besoin> clock his ass
[23:31] <deadly_yeoman> bob brutally slays movie
[23:31] <besoin> yes
[23:31] <autarch> wait, I thought he couldn't say that to her
[23:31] <deadly_yeoman> honestly better him than Caitlyn or Mom or Principal
[23:31] <Trebbers> Master criminal
[23:31] <autarch> hoo boy
[23:32] <deadly_yeoman> so relatable
[23:32] <autarch> mom will have to rescue them
[23:32] <besoin> kaitlin nooo
[23:32] <autarch> we're running out of time
[23:32] <danly_runway> pizza mom, hell yes
[23:32] <besoin> are those tomatoes pink
[23:32] <autarch> i need kaitlyn to live.
[23:32] <deadly_yeoman> yes mom
[23:32] <kayke> mom making this pizza FROM SCRATCH
[23:32] <besoin> whoops
[23:32] <deadly_yeoman> turns out mom was the most in tune with dark & edgy all along
[23:32] <deadly_yeoman> well, besides higgins
[23:33] <autarch> do u think we're gonna get to see them eat the pizza?
[23:33] <kayke> lol
[23:33] <Trebbers> I guess this lady rents the whole building
[23:33] <autarch> how did she get the rope up there
[23:33] <kayke> why is this famous/rich photographer teaching a high school class
[23:33] <autarch> how is her place so big?
[23:33] <deadly_yeoman> a ladder, autarch
[23:33] <autarch> this is real
[23:33] <autarch> this is how she gets really goood shots
[23:34] <Trebbers> 6 weeks a model
[23:34] <besoin> the mom shows up "gimme that whip"
[23:34] <deadly_yeoman> tell me the movie's not gonna make it so this gets them some sort of deal
[23:34] <danly_runway> gonna be some small-ass cuts
[23:34] <Trebbers> Not the moneymaker!
[23:34] <lhs> but he's made of self-healing cutting board
[23:34] <deadly_yeoman> filter gives him +2 against slashing damage
[23:34] <Trebbers> ok
[23:34] <besoin> nooooo
[23:35] <deadly_yeoman> lol lhs
[23:35] <autarch> ahaha
[23:35] <Bob511> Slow bullet
[23:35] <deadly_yeoman> Caitlyn all zorro chandelier calculations
[23:35] <autarch> "i gave you so much free swag
[23:35] <besoin> it'd take forever to cut that rope with a box cutter
[23:35] <deadly_yeoman> i hope this was fun for them to make
[23:35] <deadly_yeoman> but i fear it was not that kind of shoot
[23:36] <impdentist> omg
[23:36] <Trebbers> yesss
[23:36] <@Ampersand> fleabag
[23:36] <Trebbers> bonkerz
[23:36] <autarch> omg
[23:36] <autarch> is the music happening in the apartment?
[23:36] <Trebbers> yeah
[23:36] <danly_runway> dropped down like some gum
[23:36] <autarch> this rules
[23:36] <autarch>  gET THE GUBN}
[23:36] <autarch> you dumbass
[23:36] <Trebbers> waoh
[23:36] <impdentist> is the music set to stop when there's a gunshot
[23:36] <danly_runway> mom's gonna come in from behind, throw the pizza like a discus and behead her
[23:37] <impdentist> ahahaha she brought the knife all the way with her
[23:37] <autarch> mamaaaaa
[23:37] <Trebbers> ahha dan
[23:37] <deadly_yeoman> dan, we wish
[23:37] <deadly_yeoman> we were so close
[23:37] <@Ampersand> MA!
[23:37] <autarch> lol dan
[23:37] <besoin> right in her photo taking spine
[23:37] <Trebbers> haha
[23:37] <deadly_yeoman> heh beos
[23:37] <impdentist> also a woman has been stabbed
[23:37] <lhs> "hang on, gotta spraypaint 54 ST POSSE"
[23:37] <@Ampersand> wow mom way to blow up their spot
[23:37] <Bob511> "My son...his face filter...it's fading fast...."
[23:37] <autarch> stab her some more she might not be dead
[23:37] <Trebbers> hah
[23:37] <danly_runway> ya knucklehead
[23:37] <deadly_yeoman> god please do like a max headroom static thing as his filter fails
[23:37] <@Ampersand> thank u for admitting it
[23:38] <Trebbers> Time for a stinger
[23:38] <@Ampersand> mom is always right
[23:38] <autarch> "uh. yeah, i'll say so"
[23:38] <danly_runway> lol yeoman
[23:38] <impdentist> "great photoshoot!"
[23:38] <danly_runway> "He loved those ones where you were getting whipped!"
[23:38] <impdentist> wait why is his principal fielding agent calls for him
[23:38] <kayke> why would the principal be invested in this
[23:38] <deadly_yeoman> yeah dan
[23:38] <Trebbers> Yeah
[23:38] <Bob511> Everyone wants to manage this kid's career.
[23:38] <@Ampersand> is the principal named Mr. Grieves
[23:38] <autarch> principle's gonna start making out with him
[23:38] <deadly_yeoman> yeah this is just a setup for a sequel where some other photographer takes advantage of David
[23:38] <impdentist> did the whole photoshopped porn shoot angle ever get cleared up
[23:39] <Trebbers> David is dressed like an elf
[23:39] <kayke> dressed like quasimodo
[23:39] <@Ampersand> like an Alf
[23:39] <besoin> david looks like an extra in season 1 of dark
[23:39] <Trebbers> yeah, that's more it kayke
[23:39] <autarch> yessss
[23:39] <@Ampersand> insane licks
[23:39] <autarch> soundtrack brings it home
[23:39] <deadly_yeoman> gonna tell my kids this was Saved By The Bell
[23:39] <autarch> this ruled
[23:39] <besoin> deadly steve vai club
[23:39] <@Ampersand> a song to cry by
[23:39] <impdentist> i love how it's always "the players" on these
[23:39] <danly_runway> so weird to see one of these with the credits still in
[23:39] <Trebbers> yeah, a pretty great start
[23:40] <deadly_yeoman> wow
[23:40] <@Ampersand> many more thrills n' chills in store
[23:40] <danly_runway> Campbell you magnificent bastard, you've done it again
[23:40] <besoin> deadly mile high club was just so incredible
[23:40] <impdentist> steele o'neal
[23:40] <deadly_yeoman> yes
[23:40] <danly_runway> Kyle Thor
[23:40] <autarch> Lifetime just makes the best movies
[23:40] <Trebbers> Batting 1000
[23:40] <lhs> i think about DMHC like multiple times a week
[23:40] <autarch> thundeh
[23:41] <impdentist> you'd think these would get tiresome but there's always something fresh somehow
[23:41] <autarch> same, DMHC was amazing
[23:41] <autarch> I think about that dumb husband
[23:41] <deadly_yeoman> credits song by committee
[23:41] <danly_runway> love that we get 6 new tracks in the end credits
[23:41] <@Ampersand> kayke and i watched the other Lifetime movie where the DMHC psycho plays a psycho
[23:41] <@Ampersand> it was not nearly as good
[23:41] <deadly_yeoman> which one was DMHC
[23:41] <@Ampersand> OH BABY BABY
[23:41] <autarch> I think about the shot where they're doing it on top of the casket
[23:41] <danly_runway> WOO
[23:41] <autarch> Deadly Mile High Club, yeoman
[23:41] <deadly_yeoman> it's Britney (from class)
[23:41] <impdentist> britney arrows
[23:41] <deadly_yeoman> thanks autarch I missed that one
[23:41] <deadly_yeoman> lol dentist
[23:42] <deadly_yeoman> Britney Shears
User avatar

Ampersand
 
Posts: 12490
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 5:30 pm

Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 02, 2020 10:43 pm

also: Hand the Rocks the Cradle
Code: Select all
[22:14] <Ampersand> 3
[22:14] <Ampersand> 2
[22:14] <Ampersand> 1
[22:14] <besoin> ah, hollywood pictures, disney's imprint for when it wanted to make movies about abusive doctors and psychotic nannies
[22:14] <@dan2> gimme 20
[22:15] <besoin> 20
[22:15] <autarch> OK, THAT WAS THE COUNTDOWN, FOLKS. THANK YOU AMP!
[22:15] <@dan2> thank you to all who helped
[22:15] <autarch> np
[22:15] <Trebbers> hmm
[22:15] <besoin> curtis hanson, huh
[22:15] <@dan2> I was gonna do dannabella_sciorra but I knew it wouldn't fit
[22:16] <Ampersand> thank you for your service, autarch
[22:16] <besoin> i was gonna try besoinnabella
[22:16] <autarch> np. i love to help out.
[22:16] <kayke> the hand that rocks! *guitar sound*
[22:16] <@dan2> I'd let Ernie Hudson rock my baby to sleep
[22:16] <besoin> hey, i saw matt mccoy in a diner once
[22:16] <@dan2> seems like steady hands
[22:16] <Trebbers> Matt McCoy billed over Julianne Moore
[22:16] <besoin> wow, introducing madeleine zima
[22:16] <kayke> the foot that pedals the bike
[22:17] <besoin> star of the nanny and...californication
[22:17] <@dan2> looks like he's bringing home a doghouse
[22:17] <Trebbers> Bringing home a clearance beehive
[22:17] <besoin> this is the only thing they left at pottery barn
[22:17] <@dan2> this writer is doing the new Avatar by the way
[22:17] <besoin> "you forgot this!"
[22:17] <@dan2> or one of them
[22:17] <autarch> is this the prequel to cradle 2 tha grave?
[22:18] <Trebbers> Still don't believe those shits are coming out
[22:18] <@dan2> hopefully not
[22:18] <besoin> boy, there he is. good old lloyd braun.
[22:18] <Ampersand> she's helping
[22:18] <kayke> ah, family life
[22:18] <Trebbers> Wow
[22:19] <besoin> ah, 90 ml of orange juice
[22:19] <kayke> emma, shave right there
[22:19] <Trebbers> I don't like hwere this is going
[22:20] <autarch> ok
[22:20] <besoin> solomon, eh
[22:20] <Ampersand> a bit much, sol
[22:21] <@dan2> 90s audiences ate this stuff up
[22:21] <Trebbers> "Throw some shoes on and show Solomon outside" sounds like a speech exercise
[22:21] <Ampersand> mostly it's just aesthetic
[22:21] <lefthandrock> one moat, coming up
[22:21] <Bob511> Bringing in Stephen King to write a single character.
[22:21] <Ampersand> lol bob
[22:22] <lefthandrock> TEN YEARS LATER
[22:22] <autarch> "I thought the stork delivered all the little girls"
[22:22] <Trebbers> yuesssssss
[22:22] <besoin> don't get too excite
[22:22] <besoin> d
[22:23] <Trebbers> His hairline looks like a Q from the top
[22:23] <@dan2> "...and bring me a Fanta"
[22:23] <kayke> boopy!
[22:23] <Trebbers> uh
[22:23] <besoin> Q c'mon
[22:23] <autarch> fellas,
[22:24] <kayke> i was not expecting that one
[22:24] <kayke> never saw tit coming
[22:24] <@dan2> his first time ever feeling one
[22:24] <Trebbers> "I usually work on balls"
[22:24] <kayke> oh no
[22:25] <@dan2> I hope these aren't the titular hands
[22:25] <autarch> aren't you supposed to keep the gloves on?
[22:25] <autarch> dude, wtf doc
[22:25] <besoin> doubly disturbing knowing what harvey weinstein did to annabella sciorra
[22:25] <Trebbers> uh
[22:25] <Bob511> I guess she's out of practice with her inhaler...?
[22:27] <@dan2> kind of like the look McCoy has going
[22:27] <Trebbers> Has a gangster's office
[22:28] <Ampersand> Dr. Shott
[22:28] <Trebbers> ahhahah
[22:28] <@dan2> and now his office looks like applesauce
[22:28] <Ampersand> accused gyno
[22:28] <Trebbers> Allegedly a gynecologist
[22:28] <autarch> what is out the window?
[22:28] <autarch> like, where is this?
[22:29] <lefthandrock> seattle, allegedly
[22:29] <Trebbers> Puget sound or some shit
[22:29] <Trebbers> that's up that way right
[22:29] <lefthandrock> yeah
[22:29] <Bob511> The lawyer took that in stride.
[22:29] <besoin> she looks like hillary clinton
[22:30] <Trebbers> The blood on his mask is a bit much and raises questions
[22:30] <Bob511> Honestly surprised they didn't leave all this for the final-act twist.
[22:30] <lefthandrock> how's the fence coming along
[22:30] <@dan2> maybe switch over to HGTV for a bit
[22:31] <Trebbers> Would a pervert doc really be wall to wall coverage
[22:31] <@dan2> is he still doing the fence 6 months later?
[22:31] <besoin> he was on the roof
[22:31] <besoin> seems like his job has expanded
[22:31] <Trebbers> The Winchester House of fences
[22:32] <@dan2> shows how much I pay attention
[22:32] <lefthandrock> heh
[22:32] <Ampersand> lol treb
[22:32] <autarch> it would take me longer than 6 months to build a fence
[22:33] <Ampersand> Solomon seems more capable than Dad
[22:33] <besoin> there you go, treb
[22:33] <Trebbers> Matt McCoy is holding hard onto his Yacht Rock memories
[22:33] <autarch> all that exhaust can't be good for the asthma
[22:34] <lefthandrock> is she peyton zero
[22:34] <Ampersand> she is dressed like a vampire
[22:34] <autarch> you're like 50 and you've only worked with one family?
[22:35] <autarch> what were they fundamentalist mormons?
[22:35] <Trebbers> How old is she supposed ot be
[22:36] <Trebbers> "Can you tune into any other babies?"
[22:36] <besoin> she was like 32 irl
[22:36] <kayke> lol treb
[22:36] <lefthandrock> nannying and greenhouses are two things that solomon can't do
[22:37] <@dan2> no rocking the cradle yet, they're saving that for the big finale
[22:38] <Bob511> Which hand is the hand, though?
[22:38] <besoin> this is like in quantum leap when kids and dogs can see al
[22:38] <Bob511> I guess that's the mystery.
[22:38] <Ampersand> slurp
[22:38] <autarch> "looks like he's more thirsty than hungry"
[22:38] <autarch> "unless you're lactating pebbles"
[22:39] <besoin> a WHAT?
[22:39] <@dan2> he works for Bionicle
[22:39] <Trebbers> ha
[22:39] <Bob511> "Daddy's messing with things that should be left to God!"
[22:39] <Ampersand> lol dan
[22:39] <autarch> lol dan
[22:39] <Ampersand> look at her fit
[22:39] <Trebbers> "Got any milk left for me?"
[22:39] <Ampersand> look at his abomination
[22:39] <lefthandrock> when you put a kid in charge of dressing, don't be surprised when it's maple syrup and hi-C
[22:39] <autarch> she STAYED FOR DINNER?!
[22:40] <besoin> the mom asked her too
[22:40] <besoin> *to
[22:40] <autarch> "I was being facetious"
[22:40] <besoin> huh
[22:40] <Ampersand> wow he WAS hungry
[22:40] <@dan2> "I'll take the baby to go please"
[22:41] <autarch> lol amp
[22:41] <Trebbers> what the fuck
[22:42] <lefthandrock> an aeolian harp knocks them right out
[22:42] <besoin> doesn't that house have like 8 bedrooms
[22:42] <Trebbers> "This is the room where we keep the pile of money from the settlement"
[22:42] <lefthandrock> heh
[22:42] <lefthandrock> 3am, time to tutor kids in china online
[22:42] <@dan2> begins her babynapping training
[22:43] <kayke> waking up early to hex the breakfast eggs
[22:43] <Trebbers> you know that house is a lot creakier than that
[22:43] <Trebbers> You don't really need to sneak around to look at the baby
[22:43] <besoin> are babies normally awake and chilling at 3 am
[22:43] <@dan2> hey now wait just a minute
[22:43] <Trebbers> sike
[22:43] <kayke> ummm
[22:43] <autarch> phew
[22:43] <Trebbers> wha
[22:43] <@dan2> hey now wait just a minute
[22:43] <autarch> uh
[22:44] <lefthandrock> the worst part ofor lifetime movies is all the baby noises
[22:44] <lefthandrock> of*
[22:44] <kayke> any boob in a storm
[22:44] <Ampersand> "take a fucking sip, babes"
[22:44] <besoin> the mom did say he was hungry
[22:44] <@dan2> I think most of my suggestions were baby-less
[22:44] <autarch> [uplifting boob music]
[22:44] <@dan2> lol aut
[22:44] <Trebbers> hah
[22:44] <lefthandrock> thank you dan
[22:44] <Bob511> Tone down the leering, kid.
[22:44] <Ampersand> i still want to do Baby Monitor: Sound of Fear
[22:44] <Ampersand> but i feel like maybe i should preview it first
[22:44] <Trebbers> Wonder how the boob double is credited
[22:45] <kayke> they put away their birdhouse?
[22:45] <besoin> how many people is this family employing
[22:45] <@dan2> boob double is only if you get both of them out, that was only one
[22:45] <Ampersand> lol
[22:45] <kayke> wow, imagine having that kind of time to have a seasonal birdhouse
[22:46] <Trebbers> Let Solomon build progressively smaller birdhouses next to birdhouses
[22:46] <Trebbers> lol dan
[22:46] <autarch> that's insane
[22:46] <autarch> she should go with the red shoes
[22:46] <Ampersand> daaaaamn check out those sweats
[22:47] <besoin> marty the lech
[22:47] <kayke> even her scrunchie is sweats
[22:47] <Trebbers> Marty
[22:47] <autarch> "you were all out of club soda; all you had was mr pibb"
[22:47] <Trebbers> ahahah
[22:47] <Bob511> THOU. SHALT NOT. COVET. THY NEIGHBOR'S. WIFE'S. NANNY.
[22:47] <Ampersand> lol autarch
[22:47] <besoin> they had a little hotel minibar club soda in the house
[22:48] <Trebbers> haa bob
[22:48] <Trebbers> That dress is not good
[22:48] <besoin> her outfit doesn't look appropriate at all
[22:48] <autarch> she's not looking ~red dress great~ though
[22:48] <Bob511> "Sorry, hon', I decided the couch upholstery was more appealing tonight."
[22:48] <besoin> look at all those preserves
[22:49] <autarch> "ok, well don't tell your mom, but i've been breastfeeding the baby"
[22:50] <autarch> kill rob
[22:50] <besoin> yeah, hm, what is that saying
[22:50] <lefthandrock> never let an attractive woman film a yogurt commercial in your home
[22:50] <autarch> 2 in the hand is worth one in the bush
[22:50] <Bob511> Man, I miss when you could buy a house in Seattle for $3.xx.
[22:51] <@dan2> well, whoever it is is really fucking things up then!
[22:52] <besoin> fake ass park mom
[22:52] <lefthandrock> i imagine this exact conversation also takes place in dog parks
[22:52] <kayke> prepare to die, kid
[22:52] <@dan2> Bully Beatdown
[22:53] <besoin> isn't she jeopardizing her main mission for this
[22:53] <autarch> YES
[22:53] <kayke> the hand that twists the armle
[22:53] <autarch> roth btfo
[22:53] <autarch> "ok well my secret is abusing kids"
[22:54] <besoin> more workmen
[22:54] <besoin> they seem to have a guest house, but they make the nanny sleep in the basement
[22:54] <lefthandrock> "help him type it"
[22:54] <lefthandrock> like showing him where certain keys are?
[22:54] <@dan2> now this is a cool looking house
[22:56] <autarch> okay then
[22:56] <autarch> aaaaalrighty then
[22:56] <Ampersand> he felt for me, y'know
[22:56] <Bob511> "You can just go behind those bushes."
[22:57] <autarch> she gonna take a huge shit?
[22:57] <kayke> she should join the 4 horsemen
[22:57] <besoin> what is that letter? i was distracted
[22:57] <kayke> it was for the husband's work
[22:57] <kayke> wife was taking it to fedex
[22:57] <besoin> she set back gene engineering 20 years
[22:57] <@dan2> OK, OK, we'll splurge for the extra quilted Charmin next time
[22:58] <besoin> fedex had this weird ass logo in 92?
[22:58] <autarch> no, dan, he's a jeanetic engineer
[22:58] <kayke> god I love vintage fed ex's vibe
[22:58] <Ampersand> need a sippy sip
[22:58] <kayke> it looked like an air port for letters
[22:59] <Ampersand> mooning
[22:59] <Bob511> Gah
[22:59] <autarch> baby's ass just hanging oout like that?
[22:59] <Trebbers> Hmmm
[22:59] <autarch> rude/sloppy
[22:59] <Trebbers> Why does she inhale like that
[22:59] <autarch> she has asthma
[23:00] <kayke> baby has assthma
[23:00] <Trebbers> hah
[23:00] <besoin> did he type it on a typewriter or something?
[23:00] <autarch> assth, ma
[23:00] <@dan2> McCoy looks like he could play Adam Scott's dad
[23:00] <kayke> lol
[23:01] <@dan2> keep it in your pants Gilbert
[23:01] <besoin> i learned today that gilbert used to be the standard name for a male cat
[23:01] <@dan2> that's fascinating
[23:01] <besoin> like they used to call them gib cats instead of tomcats
[23:01] <@dan2> honestly
[23:02] <autarch> what is happening
[23:02] <autarch> takes a real woman to "understand marlene"
[23:02] <Trebbers> In this world people just assume you are 10 seconds away from cheating on your wife at all times
[23:02] <lefthandrock> i started thinking about cats and couldn't follow that scene at all
[23:03] <Trebbers> Boob sense tingled
[23:03] <autarch> lhs should be lefthandmilkshake for this one
[23:03] <lefthandrock> gross
[23:04] <Ampersand> autarch you're cancelled
[23:04] <autarch> just saying, didn't expect breast milk to play a major role in the plot.
[23:04] <kayke> yeah it's been a lot of boobs from second one
[23:04] <autarch> ew
[23:04] <@dan2> "Does bustin' make you feel good?"
[23:05] <autarch> dan,
[23:05] <besoin> she looks like jim henson made her
[23:05] <Ampersand> lol
[23:05] <@dan2> give em hell Soloman
[23:05] <kayke> the fence looks fantastic
[23:05] <@dan2> what the hell is that fit
[23:06] <besoin> obviously he's going to give half of the baby to claire and half to peyton to smooth this over
[23:07] <Trebbers> oh no
[23:07] <besoin> annabelle and annabella
[23:08] <Ampersand> show us on the doll where the nanny milked herself
[23:09] <besoin> chekhov's greenhouse mechanism
[23:09] <Trebbers> booooo
[23:09] <@dan2> eek
[23:09] <autarch> man
[23:10] <kayke> >:(
[23:10] <lefthandrock> the hand that plants the skivvies
[23:10] <Ampersand> starting to think this woman is bad. thoughts??
[23:10] <Trebbers> ahahah repo'd the bike
[23:10] <autarch> man this is fucked up
[23:11] <@dan2> taking him away to Oz
[23:11] <Trebbers> hah
[23:11] <besoin> heh
[23:12] <autarch> everyone around peyton dies
[23:12] <kayke> their attic is bigger than my whole apartment
[23:13] <kayke> they could fit a merry go round up there
[23:13] <lefthandrock> heh
[23:14] <Trebbers> Early 90's women's fashion might be worse than late 70's
[23:14] <besoin> shitflixe volvo
[23:14] <lefthandrock> godddd shut upppp
[23:14] <Bob511> If it makes you feel any better, their house probably smells like rotten eggs.
[23:14] <Trebbers> shut that fuckin' kid up
[23:14] <kayke> she's gonna lace the cigarettes with weed
[23:14] <Ampersand> that little shit
[23:15] <Ampersand> fuck your windchimes
[23:15] <@dan2> this is why I keep a lifesize cutout of Rebecca DeMornay in my nursery at home
[23:15] <kayke> chiming, actually
[23:15] <@dan2> really calms the little suckers down
[23:15] <Trebbers> ba dump
[23:16] <lefthandrock> JM's hair is what my quarantine hair has become
[23:16] <Ampersand> ya start to wheezing
[23:17] <autarch> "well, there are only 3 adult women in this movie"
[23:17] <lefthandrock> kissing gilbert
[23:17] <besoin> club applebees
[23:17] <@dan2> working in the lab late one night...hmm I wonder...
[23:17] <Trebbers> Oh man you can't do that Matt
[23:17] <kayke> lol dan
[23:19] <autarch> smoking at the lab
[23:19] <autarch> this surprise party is causing so much chaos
[23:19] <Trebbers> haunches
[23:19] <autarch> what is she doing
[23:19] <besoin> men love haunches
[23:20] <lefthandrock> i barely recognize him without all that belted fabric
[23:20] <@dan2> whoa, whoa, wash them off
[23:20] <Ampersand> "maybe... some... milk"
[23:20] <Trebbers> his eyes lolol
[23:20] <besoin> these two look like siblings with those eyes
[23:20] <autarch> those are the eyes of a man having a moral crisis
[23:21] <Bob511> Not even going to warn his wife about the ice cubes.
[23:21] <autarch> "Mrs. Buttsack"
[23:22] <@dan2> "He plays the harmonica?"
[23:22] <Trebbers> haha
[23:22] <besoin> this lady can't catch a break in this movie
[23:22] <Trebbers> "Is he giving you the runaround, mamm?"
[23:22] <besoin> seriously why do the characters drive volvos in every movie we watch
[23:22] <Trebbers> The official car of the pacific northwest
[23:22] <Bob511> Her asthma would probably be better controlled if someone would instruct her on using her inhaler.
[23:23] <Trebbers> She thinks it's topical
[23:23] <Bob511> :sprays ventolin in the air, walks through it like perfume:
[23:24] <@dan2> in the dishwasher?
[23:24] <besoin> yiiiiikkkkeeesss
[23:24] <Trebbers> hahah dan
[23:24] <Trebbers> ahhahahaaahah
[23:24] <autarch> he ruined the surprise?!
[23:24] <besoin> haha
[23:24] <autarch> lmao
[23:24] <Trebbers> amazing
[23:24] <autarch> love it
[23:25] <besoin> did peyton plant the lighter or whatever that was? i wasn't looking
[23:25] <Trebbers> Not sure
[23:25] <besoin> seems like she engineered and timed the whole thing
[23:25] <Trebbers> Maybe he just kept when he lit up at the bar
[23:27] <@dan2> One thing for Peyton...Peyton...the first guy you kiss can't be Papa John
[23:27] <Trebbers> ahahh
[23:27] <kayke> I think she did, because she was looking in marleen's purse and at the bar she said she misplaced it
[23:27] <Trebbers> YOU JUST CANT
[23:27] <besoin> this is tacoma
[23:28] <autarch> uh
[23:28] <autarch> whatt?
[23:28] <besoin> the hand that sets the rube goldberg machine
[23:28] <kayke> rube greenhouse machine
[23:28] <Bob511> How is a greenhouse supposed to work in Seattle/Tacoma, anyway?
[23:28] <Ampersand> MAGNOLIA DIST???
[23:28] <Bob511> Don't you need sunlight for a greenhouse effect?
[23:29] <besoin> come on
[23:29] <Trebbers> ahahaha
[23:29] <Ampersand> Boogie Night Blvd
[23:29] <@dan2> chime time
[23:29] <Trebbers> Was the the movie that introduced wind chimes to the world
[23:29] <Trebbers> Love a microfilm scene
[23:29] <autarch> yes
[23:30] <autarch> go julianne!
[23:30] <besoin> microfiche her ass, marlene
[23:30] <@dan2> *zooms in on avacado ad*
[23:30] <autarch> fuckin a
[23:30] <@dan2> lmao
[23:30] <kayke> hero
[23:30] <@dan2> this just got real
[23:30] <kayke> marlene plz be careful
[23:31] <kayke> your life is precious
[23:31] <autarch> she's about to get t-boned
[23:31] <Trebbers> About to get t-boned like Kyra Sedgwick in Singles
[23:31] <kayke> I want an apple
[23:31] <besoin> why would you be alone with someone so obviously crazy
[23:32] <@dan2> she's about to get a taste of Moore's law
[23:32] <kayke> ballsy but stupid
[23:32] <Trebbers> SHES IN THE UH Greenhouse
[23:32] <kayke> I mean, that wouldn't kill her right
[23:32] <Ampersand> redhouse
[23:32] <autarch> she dead now?
[23:33] <kayke> she should just be angrier now
[23:33] <@dan2> The Hand that Chomps the Apple
[23:33] <autarch> was that a crow or julianne who just made that cawing sound?
[23:33] <Trebbers> it's only 12 feet up
[23:33] <Ampersand> lol
[23:33] <Trebbers> less
[23:33] <autarch> that's julianne, right?
[23:33] <@dan2> Julianne Lesse
[23:33] <besoin> i wouldn't want all that glass falling on MY precious body
[23:33] <Bob511> Going to replace the albuterol with a Glade plug-in.
[23:33] <Trebbers> ahha
[23:33] <Bob511> She won't know the difference.
[23:34] <autarch> what is she putting in there?
[23:34] <Trebbers> Filled with balsamic vinegar
[23:34] <autarch> or just emptying it all out?
[23:35] <besoin> peyton's timing is really impeccable
[23:35] <Ampersand> Jokerfied
[23:35] <Bob511> "....surprise...."
[23:35] <besoin> more broken glass
[23:35] <kayke> they need less glass around this place
[23:35] <Ampersand> tomato seeds, no!
[23:35] <besoin> should hire solomon to replace all the glass with acrylic
[23:35] <lefthandrock> that french door gets broken weekly
[23:35] <@dan2> "Hello 911, my friend she's been...julianned!"
[23:36] <lefthandrock> haha
[23:36] <besoin> heh
[23:36] <Trebbers> dan
[23:36] <autarch> just tell them where you are and what you saw really fast
[23:36] <kayke> quick, someone do the thing from signs!
[23:36] <Trebbers> Write a note
[23:36] <autarch> throw water on peyton?
[23:36] <besoin> does marlene have an inhaler?
[23:37] <kayke> do cigarettes help asthma?
[23:37] <besoin> her eyes are going to be so dry
[23:37] <Ampersand> well damn
[23:37] <kayke> either wear the sweater or don't
[23:37] <Ampersand> Dilly Crystal
[23:38] <Trebbers> "Does she need any milk?"
[23:38] <besoin> can gallagher resuscitate her?
[23:38] <besoin> "this isn't gonna work, get me my mallet"
[23:38] <Bob511> Julienne'd Moore.
[23:38] <besoin> too late, bob
[23:38] <autarch> lol bob
[23:38] <Bob511> Damn it.
[23:39] <autarch> solomon
[23:39] <Trebbers> Terri Schiavo: Origins
[23:39] <Ampersand> lol
[23:40] <Ampersand> come inside. i'll make you a glass of warm milk
[23:40] <@dan2> Lloyd's brawn
[23:40] <autarch> don't do it, daddio
[23:42] <Ampersand> it sucks
[23:42] <besoin> how long has she been gone?
[23:42] <autarch> paintin
[23:43] <Ampersand> trash room
[23:43] <Bob511> "I'm burning jalapenos, would you like to take a deep breath?"
[23:43] <Ampersand> burn it
[23:43] <kayke> looks: bad
[23:43] <autarch> lmao bob
[23:43] <Ampersand> hope the kid likes turtles
[23:43] <besoin> what's with the gilbert & sullivan in this movie
[23:43] <besoin> they have a bunch of posters too
[23:43] <Bob511> "....Sephiroth!.....Sephiroth!..."
[23:44] <@dan2> is this where the Simpson's got the Gilbert and Sullivan for the Cape Feare episode?
[23:44] <@dan2> why do I make everything ending in s possessive
[23:44] <Ampersand> her fit is almost that of a Doctor Who
[23:44] <autarch> it's a good fit
[23:45] <besoin> $900K
[23:45] <kayke> if a nanny I just hired told me her husband was murdered and it was never solved, I would have been in the library looking that shit up the next day
[23:45] <autarch> frankly, all of annabella's outfits have been godo
[23:45] <autarch> *good
[23:46] <kayke> can anyone ask to go see a 900k house?
[23:46] <autarch> yeah
[23:46] <besoin> what is she hoping to see
[23:46] <Bob511> Uh
[23:46] <Bob511> New carpet, huh?
[23:46] <Trebbers> New carpet I'll bet
[23:46] <besoin> ah
[23:46] <Ampersand> pummmmmp
[23:46] <Trebbers> Da Turtles
[23:46] <@dan2> kids of mother turtles
[23:46] <besoin> i mean, you see the turtles, right, annabella?
[23:46] <Ampersand> lolllll
[23:46] <Trebbers> ahhh WHAT IS IT
[23:47] <Ampersand> tell me more
[23:47] <autarch> lol
[23:47] <Trebbers> "Like for porno or shit?"
[23:47] <besoin> volve engage
[23:47] <autarch> lol treb
[23:47] <besoin> solomon's bike
[23:47] <@dan2> "Michael, don't drink the milk with dinner tonight. TRUST ME."
[23:47] <besoin> jesus
[23:47] <Bob511> Whoa
[23:47] <Trebbers> Sweater from the Riverdale collection
[23:47] <autarch> yeaaahahhh
[23:48] <Ampersand> she's mott's apple sauce
[23:48] <lefthandrock> surprise
[23:48] <autarch> She has that mott's money
[23:48] <kayke> k.
[23:48] <Ampersand> this plan awful
[23:48] <Trebbers> record scratch
[23:49] <Trebbers> This is obviously over and no one needs to worry
[23:49] <kayke> she's a sleight or hand magician, she already has the baby up her sleeve
[23:49] <kayke> *of
[23:49] <autarch> roll credits
[23:49] <besoin> this is not peyton's place, emma
[23:50] <Trebbers> Call police first
[23:50] <autarch> all the hotels are booby trapped
[23:50] <Ampersand> Yackemoff
[23:50] <autarch> 808 yakemoff
[23:50] <autarch> damn it amp
[23:50] <besoin> oddly enough it's actually 810 yakima
[23:50] <Ampersand> :p
[23:50] <Trebbers> No emergency, just a possible murder
[23:51] <@dan2> bah!
[23:52] <Ampersand> baby monitor: sound of culture
[23:52] <besoin> unplug that sucker
[23:52] <Ampersand> got em
[23:52] <autarch> lol
[23:52] <Trebbers> good lookin fall
[23:52] <autarch> and we already established the cops aren't coming
[23:52] <besoin> we already know claire's a hard puncher
[23:52] <Bob511> She had her alarm set to wake her at 8:10pm?
[23:52] <Trebbers> Fuck doggy doors
[23:53] <autarch> claire's punch is like twin peaks s3 freddie
[23:54] <Ampersand> my legs are broken, nbd but yknow
[23:54] <autarch> this is why you should have a downstairs phone
[23:54] <besoin> god damn it, emma
[23:54] <kayke> follow directions emma
[23:54] <autarch> kid, wyd
[23:54] <kayke> nv emma
[23:54] <kayke> you did good
[23:55] <besoin> they'll still come if you call and don't say anything
[23:55] <autarch> sdaf
[23:55] <besoin> learned that the hard way
[23:55] <autarch> claire, no it aint
[23:55] <autarch> er, peyton, no it aint
[23:55] <besoin> it's actually kind of funny that madeleine zima went from this to the nanny
[23:56] <autarch> rekt
[23:56] <kayke> more door closing, less zingers
[23:56] <autarch> more zingers
[23:56] <besoin> also funny rebecca demornay played wendy in the 1997 shining given this scene
[23:56] <@dan2> HERRRRREEEE'S MORNAY
[23:56] <Trebbers> haha
[23:57] <autarch> oy, u takin the piss m8?
[23:57] <Trebbers> Cops just worthless
[23:57] <besoin> have you ever met a boomer man who called rebecca demornay rebecca dehornay? i sure have
[23:57] <autarch> emma!
[23:57] <autarch> please tell me there are more baby monitors
[23:57] <autarch> he's been living in the attic?
[23:58] <Ampersand> turn it the other way, dear
[23:58] <besoin> welp
[23:58] <@dan2> Mortal Mombat
[23:58] <Bob511> Ha
[23:58] <autarch> solomon, deck her
[23:58] <besoin> claire really needs to start keeping an inhaler on her person
[23:59] <lefthandrock> "joke's on you, we don't have sex anymore"
[23:59] <autarch> nice fake, claire
[23:59] <besoin> should have pushed her out the window, genius
[23:59] <Trebbers> oh shit
[23:59] <besoin> take two
[23:59] <Bob511> The sneaky third-act switch to a maintenance inhaler.
[00:00] <autarch> YES!
[00:00] <besoin> the fence!
[00:00] <besoin> more income for solomon!
[00:00] <Ampersand> Mission Accomplished
[00:00] <Trebbers> Glad they paid Solomon extra to sharpen those slats
[00:00] <kayke> is the fence to keep people in, keep people out, or impale people on?
[00:01] <besoin> make it an impaler was his solomon's wisdom solution to her request
[00:01] <besoin> *making it
[00:01] <lefthandrock> you're hired
[00:01] <Trebbers> 12 minute response time
[00:01] <@dan2> THERE's the titular hand
[00:01] <besoin> just in time to shoot solomon
[00:01] <kayke> baby walk!
[00:01] <autarch> how did solomon get in the attic?
[00:02] <kayke> ladder
[00:02] <autarch> ah
[00:02] <Trebbers> *cue Walk of Life
[00:02] <Ampersand> dad's broken legs became infected and he died, the end
[00:02] <autarch> had he been living there the whole time?
[00:02] <besoin> baby joe played by 19 babies
[00:02] <kayke> lol
[00:02] <Ampersand> lol
[00:02] <autarch> babies joe
[00:02] <besoin> so many adr voices
[00:02] <Ampersand> ADR VOICES: Dane Cook
[00:02] <@dan2> good job on the stunt preformers honestly
[00:03] <@dan2> the punch and fall and fights were well done
[00:03] <autarch> yeah
[00:03] <Ampersand> well done movie
[00:03] <Ampersand> extra toasty
[00:03] <autarch> Kevin "Rambo" Fitzgerald
[00:03] <besoin> they should have made it more clear that the settlement money was paying for all the projects around the house
[00:03] <besoin> like in front of peyton
[00:03] <Trebbers> Asthma Consultants
[00:03] <Trebbers> fucking 4
[00:04] <Ampersand> "yep, that's asthma alright"
[00:04] <@dan2> Box office $140 million
[00:04] <Trebbers> It was a sensation
[00:04] <besoin> probably all the t&a
[00:04] <@dan2> for a January release
[00:04] <besoin> love short credits
[00:04] <autarch> ROCK'N CRADLE PRODUCTIONS
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Sep 03, 2020 10:05 am

This Sunday,
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 06, 2020 8:30 am

Bump!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 06, 2020 4:29 pm

FAB FIVE BLOW YA MIND
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 06, 2020 8:03 pm

1 hour!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 06, 2020 8:50 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
FAB FIVE

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 06, 2020 9:01 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
FAB FIVE

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES


get in here, squad!
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 06, 2020 10:39 pm

Code: Select all
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 3
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 2
[22:14] == rah-rahtarch has changed nick to autarch
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 1
[22:14] <donnamartin> oh my god already promising
[22:14] <besoin> jenna dewan
[22:14] <donnamartin> love a cover of a cover
[22:15] <autarch> why do they all look like they have a fever of a hundred and three?
[22:15] <donnamartin> tatum o'neil?
[22:15] <donnamartin> holy shit
[22:15] <Trebbers> hip checked. nice
[22:16] <Trebbers> NO PRIMP ZONE
[22:16] <autarch> got her
[22:16] <autarch> destroyed
[22:16] <besoin> just get rid of her obviously
[22:16] <dan2> this movie is just gonna be non-stop slamming of authority and I'm all for it
[22:16] <kayke> cheer coach has michael myer's mom energy
[22:16] <Trebbers> Oh dam
[22:16] <autarch> orly adelson
[22:16] <autarch> o rly, adelson?
[22:17] <Trebbers> Is she a robot
[22:17] <besoin> oscar winner tatum o'neal here
[22:17] <@Ampersand> to warn you: they're a bit fab
[22:17] <imptexist> wait jenna tatum and tatum oneal are in the same movie?
[22:17] <donnamartin> they can fling themselves around....
[22:17] <Trebbers> Is this that donk music that was going around
[22:17] <dan2> hey, that's my nickname too
[22:17] <@Ampersand> Bacon Lettuce Tornado
[22:18] <autarch> no, we won't remember
[22:18] <besoin> she's also the same age as you
[22:18] <Trebbers> A herky and a herler
[22:18] <kayke> turkey and a turdler
[22:18] <donnamartin> lol
[22:18] <donnamartin> power move
[22:18] <@Ampersand> we <3 tompkins
[22:19] <@Ampersand> faculty, loungin'
[22:19] <kayke> walk into every room yelling your own name
[22:19] <autarch> adam reeve, resident fuckboi
[22:19] <jhs> god it's always the social studies teachers that are coaches
[22:19] <Trebbers> Better title
[22:19] <imptexist> as a former social studies teacher, this is accurate
[22:20] <besoin> chane sarruth
[22:20] <imptexist> is this allowed
[22:20] <Trebbers> too soon
[22:20] <donnamartin> teachers don't have cash
[22:20] <autarch> not now, soundtrack
[22:20] <besoin> he has that energy, treb
[22:20] <donnamartin> required church reference
[22:20] <besoin> "by studying an AP exam manual"
[22:20] <autarch> wow
[22:20] <donnamartin> your husband looks both too old and too young
[22:21] <Trebbers> His dimple is wrinkled
[22:21] <donnamartin> also don't say making my mom a grandma
[22:21] <donnamartin> to start sex
[22:21] <imptexist> the coat stays on during sex
[22:21] <autarch> "ok, let me call your sister, then"
[22:21] <Trebbers> Keeps the eggs warm
[22:21] <dan2> I mean, how do you not get all hot any heavy after that phrase Donna?
[22:21] <donnamartin> i mean it's how i start every make out session when i was in hs
[22:22] <besoin> he's gonna write upstream color during class
[22:22] <Trebbers> hah
[22:22] <autarch> why are they wearing their uniforms
[22:22] <jhs> fucking staple it
[22:22] <Trebbers> Game day or some shit
[22:22] <Trebbers> uh
[22:22] <autarch> jfc
[22:23] <besoin> "even though i don't know you"
[22:23] <besoin> this lighting is so awful
[22:23] <jhs> it's perpetually sunset here
[22:24] <@Ampersand> ya gotta tumble for me
[22:24] <autarch> it's in the US constitution
[22:24] <@Ampersand> "but you need to risk your life for us"
[22:24] <imptexist> and this is a social studies teacher
[22:24] == Trebbers [webchat@cloak-zdixmunv.hr.hr.cox.net] has quit [Ping timeout]
[22:24] <donnamartin> it's been .... a day?
[22:25] <autarch> she's been there half a day
[22:25] <imptexist> tatum overload
[22:25] <@Ampersand> great news, you've been granted tenure
[22:25] == Trebbers [webchat@edgd.96xv.2y11.ip] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:25] <autarch> "do it, you old hag"
[22:25] <imptexist> wait is the constitution thing not a joke
[22:25] <besoin> ncaa?
[22:25] <donnamartin> the US Cheer Association is very Originalist
[22:25] <@Ampersand> kinda insane that the movie treats this as unreasonable
[22:26] <Trebbers> internet went out, missed why they were kicking the girl out
[22:27] <autarch> yes! great flip flop!
[22:27] <@Ampersand> well she doesn't want to die
[22:27] <imptexist> how did they get on the cheerleader tryout cheerleader squad
[22:27] == Trebbers_ [webchat@edgd.96xv.2y11.ip] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:27] <autarch> JERRY! JERRY!
[22:27] <imptexist> CRACK
[22:27] <besoin> fweeze fwame
[22:28] <jhs> i miss the days before that fucking pinterest cursive font
[22:28] <kayke> it's good that the one who can read helped her friends identify their own names
[22:28] <donnamartin> i mean, isn't that the only thing in their lives
[22:28] <@Ampersand> fab 5, flab 4
[22:28] <autarch> oh man
[22:28] <besoin> that wasn't a texas registration sticker
[22:28] == Trebbers [webchat@edgd.96xv.2y11.ip] has quit [Ping timeout]
[22:28] <jhs> i can't tell anyone apart
[22:29] == Trebbers_ has changed nick to Trebbers
[22:29] <autarch> why would the principle be involved in this??
[22:29] <dan2> Fab and Furious
[22:29] <Trebbers> harsh
[22:29] <besoin> god
[22:29] <Trebbers> Listening to rock instrumentals
[22:29] <besoin> this is hard to look at
[22:29] <imptexist> dust storm
[22:29] <jhs> driving into the haboob
[22:29] <kayke> what is this fit
[22:29] <Trebbers> haha
[22:29] <donnamartin> that hat
[22:30] <autarch> that lizzie mcguire beret
[22:30] <imptexist> oh my god
[22:30] <dan2> oh god
[22:30] <autarch> um, ok
[22:30] <Trebbers> That bus driver is really handsy
[22:30] <kayke> her doctor said she can't tumble!
[22:30] <autarch> for being 23?
[22:31] <imptexist> HAGS
[22:31] <autarch> it's been 5 weeks?!
[22:31] <kayke> buy your wife some ugly hats
[22:31] <donnamartin> i can't with this hat
[22:32] <imptexist> oh no
[22:32] <besoin> hat made out of a box of peeps
[22:32] <autarch> omg
[22:32] <donnamartin> i'm actually offended
[22:32] <Trebbers> "Heavy on the Smashmouth"
[22:32] <donnamartin> oh honey
[22:32] <autarch> "if you need me i'll be at claire's"
[22:32] <jhs> vhs and chill
[22:32] <imptexist> gonna guess snow patrol
[22:32] <donnamartin> oooof, kiddo
[22:32] <dan2> "Have a good summer conducting that train, alright."
[22:32] <kayke> lol autarch
[22:32] <besoin> so cold in texas in june
[22:33] <@Ampersand> kuss hurrrr
[22:33] <autarch> this guy just trying to choreograph everything
[22:33] <@Ampersand> make out. hey, make out
[22:33] <Trebbers> ahahh
[22:33] <kayke> a pre covid world where you could make out with your friends at parties
[22:33] <donnamartin> i thought that was the principal
[22:33] <jhs> "using every blacklight on earth"
[22:33] <besoin> pass out boo
[22:33] <@Ampersand> pass oot beweze
[22:33] <imptexist> pffffff
[22:33] <autarch> cool mom
[22:33] <Trebbers> Marg Fridays are sacred
[22:34] <dan2> tequila and Sun Chips
[22:34] <dan2> a winning combo
[22:34] <@Ampersand> love these tree lights
[22:34] <autarch> "hey, I'm 24 "
[22:34] <@Ampersand> i don't think you have good hair
[22:34] <donnamartin> bc you're on To Catch a Predator
[22:34] <Trebbers> Are they getting blitzo on Energon
[22:34] <imptexist> is blinking glass a thing
[22:34] <Fab511> Ha
[22:34] <dan2> dude looks like Christian Slater playing Eric Trump
[22:34] <kayke> this look too!
[22:34] <besoin> so much yellow and orange in this
[22:34] <autarch> "because you're a finance bro"
[22:35] <@Ampersand> you could see that hat from space
[22:35] <kayke> did they steal a costume person from icarly or something?
[22:35] <donnamartin> it was 2003 besoin
[22:35] <besoin> or from a cessna, amp
[22:35] <autarch> is tim gonna die?
[22:35] <autarch> Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!
[22:36] <autarch> wait, isn't SHE superintendent?
[22:36] <Trebbers> These girls are 5 Jokers and I'm on their side
[22:36] <jhs> she's the principal afaik
[22:36] <imptexist> texas went to the state supreme court for this kind of conspicuously unequal school funding
[22:36] <autarch> are superintendent and principal played by the sam person?
[22:36] <Trebbers> I think they came on the the superintendent (balding dude)
[22:37] <besoin> that was the vice principal
[22:37] <Trebbers> ohhh
[22:37] <besoin> the superintendent hasn't appeared
[22:37] <kayke> seeing them walk with a group of normally dressed people is like seeing a player character in a cutscene with npcs
[22:37] <autarch> zandaleaders
[22:37] <autarch> no u are
[22:38] <besoin> i can't actually confirm that there are only 5 evil cheerleaders
[22:38] <@Ampersand> ain't got no chill, bitch
[22:38] <imptexist> she's studying geography in her spare time
[22:38] <donnamartin> they're in a fight over tape?
[22:38] <besoin> this is the hotel monteleone
[22:38] <Trebbers> Oh shiiiiit
[22:39] <besoin> i've been to this pool
[22:39] <autarch> noooo
[22:39] <donnamartin> come don't be stupid
[22:39] <Trebbers> Plant some blow in the bag
[22:39] <jhs> was it this yellow and purple irl
[22:39] <besoin> mardi gras colors
[22:39] <autarch> they're texting the thirsty teacher
[22:39] <imptexist> everything in new orleans is yellow and purple
[22:39] <Trebbers> haahha
[22:39] <donnamartin> ahahahaha
[22:39] <donnamartin> that's the text they chose?
[22:40] <autarch> do the writers know what hotboxing is?
[22:40] <autarch> ok, thank you writers
[22:40] <kayke> married people don't smoke weed!
[22:40] <Trebbers> "Be thankful we didn't send a text about hot pocketing"
[22:40] <autarch> just kick her off the tteam
[22:41] <Fab511> "It's probably funnier if you're high."
[22:41] <donnamartin> lollipops were an inspired touch
[22:41] <besoin> just take them off the team right before the competition so the parents/superintendent can't intervene
[22:41] <kayke> they each have their own room at the hotel?
[22:41] <Trebbers> What is this lady talking about
[22:41] <besoin> from the looks of it she's going to be home with diarrhea tomorrow anyway
[22:41] <autarch> feel like brooke fits the bill in terms of being a cheerleader
[22:42] <autarch> "it's about the football boys u cheer for"
[22:42] <dan2> am I nuts is or there a single Circus Peanut on the bed
[22:42] <kayke> it is kind of fucked up the cheerleaders don't get names on their uniforms
[22:42] <kayke> she's turning me against her
[22:42] <Trebbers> What kind of twisted mf eats circus peanuts
[22:42] <autarch> brooke pls cry
[22:42] <kayke> i want the cheerleaders to rise up
[22:43] <jhs> eating candy directly off a filthy hotel bedspread, mmm
[22:43] <imptexist> "we couldn't afford to get the uniforms with the names on the back because we got you all your own rooms in a nice hotel at cheer camp"
[22:43] <donnamartin> it's a traaaaaaaaap
[22:43] <dan2> "Puff...puff...puff it up"
[22:43] <besoin> welp, movie over i guess
[22:43] <autarch> wow, soundtrack
[22:43] <dan2> really turned the corner
[22:43] <Trebbers> FALL PEP RALLY
[22:43] <donnamartin> wow, oscar for the movie editing
[22:43] <jhs> <marquis>
[22:43] <kayke> ummm
[22:43] <@Ampersand> "i give you CATS"
[22:43] <besoin> are they doing the monkeys from 2001
[22:44] <Trebbers> The ascent of man
[22:44] <donnamartin> it's like remember the titans
[22:44] <autarch> it's an abu ghraib reenactment
[22:44] <Trebbers> woah
[22:44] <autarch> thiis actually rules
[22:44] <Trebbers> It's like the play at the end of Rushmore w/D&B
[22:44] <besoin> is this girl talk
[22:44] <@Ampersand> lol
[22:44] <autarch> besoin i was just about to post that
[22:45] <jhs> bring [limos and bad attitudes] on
[22:45] <besoin> wish i could listen to girl talk and get 8 loko
[22:45] <Trebbers> Why can't they get a breakdancing hornet on the floor
[22:45] <autarch> it was all a dream
[22:45] <donnamartin> megan don't fall for it it's a trapppp
[22:45] <besoin> are all the mean ones seniors? could just wait for them to leave
[22:46] <kayke> time to sweep up the confetti
[22:46] <imptexist> if this was actually in texas she would have said "y'all" not "you guys"
[22:46] <besoin> the rehead's dad owns party city
[22:46] <@Ampersand> shots shots shots shots
[22:46] <Trebbers> hah
[22:46] <besoin> the teacher's not a texan but she got there as fast as she could, imp
[22:46] <autarch> it's official that was the best pep rally in jackson history
[22:47] <besoin> why does brooke hate her mom
[22:47] <Trebbers> Because she cares more about the school?
[22:47] <autarch> idk her mom seems cool
[22:47] <kayke> her mom questioned her power
[22:47] <autarch> waiit
[22:47] <besoin> e! true hollywood story ratbags here
[22:47] <autarch> who is she
[22:48] <autarch> bes,
[22:48] <dan2> amp I hope you're writing these movies they keep promoting down
[22:48] <autarch> oh my agod
[22:49] <besoin> ashley was in now you see me AND the final destination
[22:49] <kayke> what is happening
[22:49] <donnamartin> the music omg
[22:49] <Trebbers> bonkers
[22:49] <autarch> JERRY, RUN!!1
[22:49] <kayke> is she getting purged?
[22:49] <besoin> lord of the back handsprings
[22:49] <donnamartin> i didn't think this is how popular girls fought
[22:49] <@Ampersand> cheerleader jail
[22:49] <@Ampersand> fugly!
[22:49] <Fab511> "Make out!"
[22:49] <Trebbers> ah
[22:49] <imptexist> worldstat
[22:49] <@Ampersand> you fitch
[22:49] <dan2> lol
[22:49] <imptexist> agj
[22:49] <autarch> jerry
[22:49] <donnamartin> holyshit
[22:49] <besoin> there go coach carr's hard-won gains
[22:50] <Trebbers> right in the pom-pom maker
[22:50] <kayke> her stomach cramp stomped on her face
[22:50] <besoin> but the entire premise is these girls can't be punished, shane
[22:50] <donnamartin> i mean i feel like that should get you expelled
[22:50] <autarch> who's lisa
[22:50] <imptexist> that teacher had no idea what to do
[22:50] <dan2> I should have tried all of this back in HS
[22:51] <donnamartin> this girl's acting is on fire
[22:51] <dan2> really regretting it now
[22:51] <autarch> wait lisa rules
[22:51] <besoin> tweety bird says quit the tweetin'
[22:51] <Fab511> For years.
[22:51] <Trebbers> More than one year, probably less than 5
[22:51] <imptexist> they've been here for 15 years now
[22:51] <@Ampersand> tabitha, get to tabbin
[22:52] <autarch> but shouldn't their increased pep be helping?
[22:52] <besoin> demerits
[22:52] <autarch> who's DeMaris?
[22:52] <Trebbers> witch hunt for demerits
[22:52] <@Ampersand> Cheerleaders Rule
[22:52] <autarch> tender merits?
[22:52] <Trebbers> Mr. Sputnik
[22:52] <imptexist> EMMA
[22:53] <jhs> imagine when they get into pregnancy pacts
[22:53] <dan2> total control
[22:53] <autarch> this mom needs to mom up
[22:55] <besoin> the open container boys
[22:55] <donnamartin> i don't think fake IDs would cover up for the uniforms
[22:55] <autarch> white n nerdy more like
[22:55] <dan2> Sexy Kitty
[22:55] <Trebbers> To a closed store?
[22:56] <autarch> he's dressed up  as black cougar
[22:56] <@Ampersand> siiiiick
[22:56] <Trebbers> So sick
[22:56] <autarch> big mood
[22:56] <besoin> looks like her house is on 90 acres
[22:56] <Trebbers> who's janis
[22:56] <@Ampersand> such disgrace
[22:56] <dan2> love the Carrot Top wig they sell at the sex shop
[22:57] <imptexist> well it's the featured video (!)
[22:57] <dan2> the entire Rooster Club
[22:57] <Trebbers> Foghorn will not be pleased
[22:57] <autarch> what is John Delaney
[22:57] <autarch> doiing there again?
[22:57] <besoin> trying to get to his shift at best buy
[22:58] <Trebbers> ahahha
[22:58] <besoin> this school and the hugs
[22:59] <Trebbers> "How did you find it, I set the video to private"
[22:59] <@Ampersand> daaaaamn
[22:59] <autarch> got em
[22:59] <besoin> who are those other girls?
[22:59] <donnamartin> rude to trashy sluts
[22:59] <Trebbers> alternate cheer jurors
[23:00] <besoin> the sounds
[23:00] <besoin> i didn't realize there were that many non-fab cheerleaders
[23:00] <dan2> that was actually a push-pop
[23:00] <imptexist> what's with the cinematography
[23:01] <kayke> prepare to get cheer-beated
[23:01] <besoin> the good daughter
[23:02] <Trebbers> The Fab 5 believes in a living Cheerleading Constitution
[23:02] <autarch> bratz
[23:02] <@Ampersand> never seen such trash
[23:03] <dan2> boops
[23:03] <Trebbers> bwebs
[23:03] <donnamartin> what's wrong mr machonogey?
[23:03] <donnamartin> also, i'm kind of with them honestly
[23:03] <dan2> who gives a shit
[23:03] <dan2> also look at the at that star necklace
[23:03] <dan2> holy shit
[23:03] <besoin> more cowbell
[23:03] <dan2> looks like a first grader cut it out of tinfoil
[23:04] <Trebbers> the dude in the back
[23:04] <kayke> where did the teacher go?
[23:04] <@Ampersand> brutal
[23:04] <autarch> yeah this is fucking brutal
[23:04] <dan2> he got too horny and had to leave
[23:05] <autarch> owned
[23:05] <Trebbers> hacked
[23:05] <besoin> bueller!
[23:05] <autarch> they're hackers
[23:05] <@Ampersand> is it possible they hacked the planet?
[23:05] <besoin> hackers, spring breakers, ferris buellers
[23:05] <dan2> they broke him
[23:06] <besoin> let her go
[23:06] <autarch> good
[23:06] <donnamartin> sounds like a gift
[23:06] <autarch> yeah let her leave
[23:06] <autarch> you need to know what family is worth holding on to
[23:06] <Fab511> I suppose she does have the skillset to run away and join the circus.
[23:07] <autarch> wait
[23:07] <autarch> i thought HE was coach car
[23:07] <autarch> *carr
[23:08] <Trebbers> haahhha
[23:08] <@Ampersand> PEEWEE
[23:08] <Trebbers> hojly shit
[23:08] <dan2> sick
[23:08] <besoin> there are a lot more of the non-fab cheerleaders
[23:08] <autarch> is she the one with the bad back?
[23:09] <@Ampersand> "let's kill a homeless person"
[23:09] <Trebbers> Fake tool on the soundtrack
[23:09] <besoin> let's go to gadzooks
[23:09] <autarch> i hope they get in a crash and die, honestly
[23:09] <Trebbers> ahahh
[23:09] <@Ampersand> "let's burn a Chuck E. Cheese to the ground"
[23:09] <Trebbers> I hope it's not his last day before retirement
[23:09] <besoin> the only honest man in town
[23:10] <donnamartin> what on earth is brook wearing
[23:10] <besoin> she's dressed like paris hilton's dog
[23:11] <Trebbers> ahahh
[23:11] <dan2> Sprutnik is in way over his head
[23:11] <kayke> lmao besoin
[23:11] <Trebbers> Everybody gets one day iss
[23:11] <autarch> because they drank it all
[23:11] <besoin> i mean, you have to know when you're beat
[23:11] <dan2> aside from being drunk there was nothing that proved they were drinking
[23:11] <imptexist> do it
[23:12] <autarch> isn't it up to her to kick them off the team?
[23:12] <besoin> yowza
[23:12] <imptexist> she's right there!
[23:12] <jhs> VP hands her a tampon
[23:12] <kayke> she tried to kick one of them off the team and it didn't work
[23:12] <@Ampersand> YOU'RE OUT OF ORDER
[23:12] <imptexist> THIS WHOLE COURT IS OUT OF ORDER
[23:12] <@Ampersand> big suit
[23:12] <dan2> damn, she really Sprut him down
[23:13] <kayke> pirate bandana
[23:13] <besoin> "but we want to cheer for the boys uh bloo bloo blooo"
[23:13] <imptexist> it's covering up her head injury from her dui accident
[23:14] <jhs> an entire school with no overhead lights
[23:14] <autarch> who is she?
[23:14] <besoin> the demerits, chester
[23:14] <dan2> "You'll only be allowed to cheer if you share that tequila"
[23:14] <kayke> you girls will be written up for these fucking outfits
[23:15] <@Ampersand> slow fade
[23:15] <donnamartin> they'll just form their own Telia Tequila sqaud
[23:15] <jhs> where's the pregnancy and murder and pretending to be someone's long-lost daughter
[23:15] <besoin> man, forgot that person existed
[23:16] <dan2> shoulda tried candy
[23:16] <Trebbers> judas
[23:16] <@Ampersand> dead the the five
[23:16] <dan2> maybe a nice Starburst
[23:16] <donnamartin> i want to discuss her tank top
[23:16] <autarch> "because we're gonna have to repeat senior year"
[23:16] <@Ampersand> EVIDENCE
[23:17] <autarch> omg, buying tape
[23:17] <kayke> it also wasn't sexual?
[23:17] <besoin> wargo wartindale
[23:17] <dan2> lol
[23:18] <@Ampersand> "are you jealous of Jerri?"
[23:18] <besoin> oh yeah, the cheering
[23:19] <besoin> oh god
[23:19] <Trebbers> ahah
[23:19] <dan2> oh god
[23:19] <autarch> god
[23:19] <@Ampersand> wrapped entirely around her leg
[23:20] <autarch> being a teacher seems awful
[23:20] <dan2> maybe she cheated on the essay portion of her test
[23:20] <donnamartin> they're communicating like raptors
[23:20] <Trebbers> DADDY
[23:20] <besoin> the redhead is the scariest
[23:20] <dan2> enter: Daddy
[23:20] <imptexist> she's a cheerleader so she can flex her leg straight up to read the parts on the bottom
[23:21] <Trebbers> Work them off
[23:21] <besoin> who is mister reisisnsnsnsbberg?
[23:21] <dan2> he said you can't keep me from performing at the old town road
[23:21] <autarch> who's her dad?
[23:21] <Fab511> "No, I mean your resignation."
[23:21] <besoin> come on, emma
[23:21] <Trebbers> This lady is dum
[23:21] <dan2> oh this guy again
[23:21] <jhs> the oldest husband
[23:22] <donnamartin> her husband looks like her dad
[23:22] <besoin> gets arrested every time they go to dinner
[23:23] <Trebbers> Pack your shit and go
[23:23] <autarch> just tell the girls
[23:23] <autarch> she's not your boss
[23:23] <imptexist> she also teaches a class doesn't she
[23:23] <jhs> clomp clomp
[23:23] <donnamartin> so much clomping
[23:23] <Trebbers> Stand and Deliver vs. Shut Up and Run Away
[23:23] <besoin> sounds like someone whistled for roach
[23:24] <dan2> I should have done this to all my teachers
[23:24] <kayke> jerry's tomato necklace
[23:24] <autarch> who IS she?
[23:24] <besoin> who is mr studdard? who are all these people?
[23:24] <Trebbers> "Nancy Grace"
[23:25] <jhs> it's erin T knight
[23:25] <Fab511> "Why did they blur our faces? We're twenty-seven."
[23:25] <besoin> couldn't mr reisenberg and mr studdard and mr tompkins and mr sputnik talk to the news
[23:25] <autarch> omg
[23:25] <@Ampersand> "we can now dress better than ever"
[23:25] <donnamartin> what is the pink shirt?
[23:25] <autarch> this is tthe beest ending ever
[23:25] <besoin> njnc
[23:25] <autarch> roll crediit
[23:26] <kayke> it's gonna be inspector gadget
[23:26] == Trebbers [webchat@edgd.96xv.2y11.ip] has quit [EOF from client]
[23:26] <@Ampersand> lol
[23:26] <autarch> thassa me
[23:26] <Fab511> "Yaknowhatimean?"
[23:27] <besoin> 40 whole hours
[23:27] <autarch> wow
[23:27] == Trebbers [webchat@edgd.96xv.2y11.ip] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[23:27] <autarch> she loves sharing the hug pic
[23:27] <@Ampersand> mam
[23:27] <besoin> this hearing saved old navy's 3rd quarter
[23:28] <Fab511> Heh
[23:28] <autarch> is that deb from napoleeon dynamite?
[23:28] <autarch> JUST GOOGLE HOTBOXING
[23:29] <kayke> lol
[23:29] <Trebbers> ahahh
[23:29] <besoin> emma zoom
[23:29] <imptexist> "that's because i just got done running"
[23:29] <dan2> no one told me Wilford Brimley had a son
[23:29] <besoin> he does seem a little sinister
[23:30] <@Ampersand> sequel alert: THE CHEERLEADER MURDERS
[23:30] <besoin> we all know usc has high standards
[23:30] <besoin> record scratch
[23:30] <autarch> lol
[23:30] <kayke> wow
[23:31] <Fab511> A literal carte blanche?
[23:31] <dan2> a deadly new strain of cheerleaders
[23:31] <besoin> i mean, it's not just her
[23:31] <autarch> owned
[23:31] <@Ampersand> off with her head
[23:31] <kayke> surprising king
[23:31] <autarch> yeah what about that one girl's super obnoxious mom
[23:31] <jhs> i accuse my principal
[23:31] <imptexist> "YA BUSTED"
[23:31] <besoin> fired like a dog
[23:31] <Trebbers> besoin
[23:31] <dan2> just make these 4 the principals
[23:31] <autarch> if that one mom who threatened to sue got more screen time she'd be the main villain
[23:32] <kayke> your mom just got pwned
[23:32] <imptexist> i think they're actually next in line of succession for principal
[23:32] <besoin> that's all it took?
[23:32] <besoin> coach carr is the new superintendent
[23:33] <autarch> why are they sad? they hated being on the squad.
[23:33] <@Ampersand> you will lead cheers      NO MORE
[23:33] <Trebbers> sad five
[23:33] <donnamartin> why are they high fiving? they didn't do shit
[23:33] <autarch> lol
[23:33] <Trebbers> why was this a national story
[23:33] <besoin> blondes
[23:33] <Fab511> In fact, the guy was angry that there was an investigation, right?
[23:34] <besoin> "of course i'm disappointed, i owe ashley furniture $20K"
[23:34] <Trebbers> It's a little bit about what they did
[23:34] <kayke> lol
[23:34] <jhs> heh
[23:34] <imptexist> "i don't even want to sell the rights to lifetime! "
[23:34] <autarch> lol bes\
[23:34] <Trebbers> "Listen honey, my social security kicks in next year, so we'll be fine"
[23:34] <autarch> lol
[23:34] <autarch> who's janice?
[23:35] <besoin> go girls, go team, win
[23:35] <Trebbers> Brunette mom
[23:35] <Fab511> Win, team, win!
[23:35] <Trebbers> there
[23:35] <autarch> ah
[23:35] <donnamartin> she's one of the normal girls' momms
[23:36] <@Ampersand> "She saw Spot run"
[23:36] <Trebbers> ahah
[23:36] <autarch> "WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME B****?!"
[23:36] <dan2> "...and she got an F"
[23:36] <besoin> meanwhile brooke is anchoring on fox news
[23:37] <@Ampersand> they bringed it on
[23:37] <imptexist> i assume this is not digetic
[23:37] <autarch> no it is
[23:37] <Trebbers> Why is this routine boring
[23:37] <besoin> hard to cheer to mario party music
[23:37] <Trebbers> ah
[23:37] <donnamartin> lol
[23:37] <jhs> they win for most side-lit school
[23:37] <kayke> i forgot there could be life time movies where no one gets murdered
[23:37] <dan2> yes!
[23:37] <besoin> yeah, it's awful, kayke
[23:37] <Trebbers> 2008 was a weird time
[23:37] <donnamartin> same, kayke
[23:37] <@Ampersand> only some teens futures were murdered tonight
[23:37] <besoin> all this work and jessie j stole her husband anyway
[23:38] <Trebbers> I would have bet money there was murder or prostitution in this
[23:38] <@Ampersand> ROUND TWO
[23:38] <dan2> wait a tic, I think some murders are about to start
[23:38] <dan2> called it
[23:38] <autarch> why wasn't anyone klled?
[23:38] <besoin> now we're talking
[23:38] <Trebbers> damn
[23:38] <Fab511> The sequel everyone wanted.
[23:38] <besoin> hey!
[23:38] <imptexist> what a tease
[23:38] <autarch> yeah, we need to see this
[23:38] <@Ampersand> Based on a True Friendship
[23:38] <dan2> a curse that moo-
[23:38] <Trebbers> Based on an email forward
[23:38] <jhs> that one looks really good
[23:38] <autarch> lol
[23:38] <donnamartin> lol
[23:38] <@Ampersand> night all! THE NET on Tuesday!
[23:38] <kayke> she believes in curses! I want to believe too
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Postby Bob511 » Sun Sep 06, 2020 10:43 pm

Image
Eric Roberts wrote:Hipinion. Hipinion? Hipinion...is hip.
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Postby donna martin » Mon Sep 07, 2020 9:06 am

I woke up from what felt kind an hours-long dream about the fab 5, except they were running my college paper and I was working to expose them from the inside. Except we were also on a space ship, it was ice blue, and time was running out to publish but I needed more time.

And also beyonce was helping me with background investigation.
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Postby Ampersand » Tue Sep 08, 2020 9:19 am

This Wednesday:
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 09, 2020 8:21 am

bump. it'll be in the box this afternoon!
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 09, 2020 2:40 pm

bump. uppin now
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 09, 2020 7:06 pm

2 hours to go!
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 09, 2020 8:46 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
KILLER IN THE GUEST HOUSE

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https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 09, 2020 9:01 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
KILLER IN THE GUEST HOUSE

Image
https://webchat.quakenet.org
Channel: #HPNMOVIESERIES
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 09, 2020 10:38 pm

Code: Select all
[22:11] <@Ampersand> 3
[22:12] == autarch [webchat@7wux.bz96.b408.ip] has joined #hpnmovieseries
[22:12] <autarch> Hi!
[22:12] <@Ampersand> 2
[22:12] <autarch> wait
[22:12] <@Ampersand> ...
[22:12] <airbnbesoin> boooo
[22:12] <autarch> ok
[22:12] <@Ampersand> 1
[22:12] <dan2> oh my god I almost started
[22:12] <dan2> OH GOD
[22:12] <airbnbesoin> redo
[22:12] <autarch> thanks for waitting
[22:12] <@Ampersand> cancel autarch
[22:13] <@Ampersand> *in the*
[22:13] <Trebbers> I started and ninja dragged that shit back to 000
[22:13] <airbnbesoin> is this a christopher nolan movie
[22:13] <dan2> Killer In the Guest House: Eric's Revenge
[22:13] <Trebbers> yeah srsly
[22:13] <@Ampersand> lol
[22:13] <autarch> sir, please be civil
[22:13] <autarch> wait
[22:13] <autarch> is eric in this?
[22:13] <@Ampersand> love watching you back that hatch
[22:13] <airbnbesoin> they always look like radio rebel
[22:13] <kayke> love to watch you work, hate to see you paid
[22:14] <Trebbers> "I circled the illuminati shit on there too"
[22:14] <autarch> is this guy acting in one of those "we give you money for your old cell phone" commercials?
[22:14] <airbnbesoin> he leased an 80s porsche 928?
[22:14] <airbnbesoin> is he shirt from madewell
[22:14] <airbnbesoin> *her
[22:15] <Trebbers> *bwamm bwamm*
[22:15] <airbnbesoin> hey, this isn't tenet -- it's TENANT
[22:15] <Trebbers> ahha
[22:15] <Trebbers> goddamnit
[22:15] <airbnbesoin> who will check to see if miscasasucasa.com is real
[22:16] <dan2> "We gotta pay for this airplane hangar somehow..."
[22:16] <@Ampersand> heck of a work out outfit
[22:16] <dan2> Jaxon Ansel
[22:16] <airbnbesoin> site does not exist
[22:16] <@Ampersand> hello jaw
[22:16] <autarch> helLO!
[22:16] <Bob511> "In a killer-in-a-Lifetime-movie sort of way."
[22:16] <airbnbesoin> he likes to domestic abuse
[22:16] <@Ampersand> graduated from the military summa cum laude
[22:17] <Trebbers> Looks like a bobble head of Adam Scott
[22:17] <autarch> is that Rachel Dratch's younger cousin or something?
[22:17] <dan2> stunt double for Ken Marino
[22:17] <@Ampersand> the absolute tightest outfit that has ever existed
[22:17] <@Ampersand> like saran wrap
[22:17] <Trebbers> yeah
[22:17] <airbnbesoin> thanos's brither in law
[22:18] <Trebbers> do cameras do that
[22:18] <airbnbesoin> one of you will betray me tonight...is it ME jesus
[22:18] <autarch> wait, why is he at her house
[22:18] <Trebbers> He's renting the airplane hangar
[22:18] <autarch> oh cool
[22:19] <airbnbesoin> he'll feel right at home
[22:19] <autarch> Grounded, like you will soon be
[22:19] <Trebbers> why is there a towel hanging there
[22:20] <Trebbers> Negging the guest house?
[22:20] <@Ampersand> neggin her shrubs
[22:20] <autarch> yes, at loch ness
[22:20] <Bob511> "The freezer is large enough for a un-decapitated corpse."
[22:20] <Trebbers> ahahh
[22:20] <airbnbesoin> surely pilots can do better than this
[22:20] <dan2> what was the other thing we watched recently where the guy in it was emulating Tom Cruise?
[22:20] <autarch> ah, conveniently single
[22:21] <autarch> oh god, yeah who was that
[22:21] <Trebbers> convincing
[22:21] <@Ampersand> i'm a fiend for studios
[22:22] <Trebbers> Don't make me read movie
[22:22] <@Ampersand> "my favorite dish: grapes"
[22:22] <autarch> oh he's in boyfriend mode already
[22:22] <lhouse> whiskey?
[22:22] <Trebbers> srsy wish he had been wearing her workout outfit
[22:22] <dan2> "mmm, great mayonaise"
[22:23] <@Ampersand> he's got big landlord energy, so i'm surprised he's the tenant
[22:23] <Trebbers> Do the glasses mean the shirt is for nerds
[22:23] <autarch> oh no
[22:23] <Trebbers> The camera needs a living subject to be tested
[22:24] <airbnbesoin> which one is the murderer
[22:24] <dan2> the market is hungry for pictures of desert highway
[22:24] <autarch> when he was in the pet zone?
[22:24] <airbnbesoin> and the sign from pike place
[22:25] <autarch> this guy is going to have neck problems because his jaw is too heavy
[22:25] <lhouse> the idiot husband in DMHC was pretty yolo and look where it got him
[22:26] <kayke> time to use her freaky email that doesn't list the senders in her inbox
[22:26] <dan2> "and I based my perfomance on Tom Cruise in Magnolia"
[22:26] <@Ampersand> ever thought about styling your hair differently?
[22:26] <Trebbers> Smash that text size button
[22:26] <@Ampersand> lol
[22:27] <Trebbers> Leron
[22:27] <dan2> Leron: The Dumbest Guy in the Room
[22:27] <autarch> LEEROOOOOOOY JEENKINS
[22:27] <Trebbers> ahah dan
[22:28] <autarch> does he always wear that?
[22:28] <lhouse> he's going to sell the pilot a pager
[22:28] <dan2> now shifting into Cruise in Mission Impossible
[22:28] <@Ampersand> haha gum in your wheel well, suck it
[22:29] <dan2> I hope he hits them all
[22:29] <airbnbesoin> why'd she go out with this guy
[22:29] <dan2> Leisure Suit Levon
[22:29] <lhouse> heh
[22:29] <autarch> Got that square thing?
[22:29] <@Ampersand> lol dan
[22:29] <kayke> credit card having idiot
[22:30] <@Ampersand> charge meeeee
[22:30] <lhouse> does the wallpaper match the shirt
[22:30] <dan2> don't punch his jaw, you'll cut yourself on those edges
[22:30] <autarch> you can't just treat a lamp like that
[22:31] <airbnbesoin> "wow, you date real pieces of shit"
[22:31] <autarch> god look at that jaw
[22:31] <Trebbers> OK
[22:31] <kayke> call it a night at 11am
[22:31] <autarch> she's a night owl
[22:32] <Trebbers> \\ Levon //
[22:32] <autarch> "escuse me? where is my fucking breakfast?"
[22:32] <dan2> uhhhh yeAHH
[22:32] <autarch> this guy is ridiculous
[22:32] <Trebbers> When does he work
[22:32] <@Ampersand> yeah i read
[22:33] <dan2> imagining him flying a commercial flight shirtless in the cockpit
[22:33] <Trebbers> The wings taped to his bare chest
[22:33] <autarch> he'd wear a shirt but he'd have it all the way unbuttoned except for like the bottom 2 buttons
[22:34] <kayke> gonna put a tracker on the washing machine
[22:34] <airbnbesoin> "wow, i love paying interest"
[22:34] <Trebbers> LEVON approaching
[22:34] <dan2> google alert for Levon
[22:34] <autarch> LEVON approaching
[22:34] <autarch> a challenger approaches
[22:35] <Bob511> I love my Low Interest Rate on my Small Business Package.
[22:35] <Trebbers> zoink
[22:35] <airbnbesoin> he could just pay her via paypal
[22:35] <airbnbesoin> no need for all this murder
[22:36] <dan2> not all the pictures of old road signs and old wire fences nooooo
[22:36] <kayke> our hearts beat as one
[22:36] <autarch> why do all computers in these movies run on Movie OS?
[22:36] <lhouse> is it a copyright issue to show windows transferring files or something
[22:36] <airbnbesoin> i think so
[22:37] <lhouse> levon will be pushing up floral prints
[22:37] <autarch> just leave him there
[22:37] <kayke> levon? more like passed-on
[22:38] <@Ampersand> lol
[22:38] <@Ampersand> calling on behalf of Slime
[22:38] <dan2> lol
[22:38] <airbnbesoin> "we have to know -- where is this 'pike place'?"
[22:38] <autarch> can i have levon's clothes?
[22:39] <dan2> what is the
[22:39] <dan2> what kind of car is this
[22:39] <lhouse> new bug, isn't it
[22:39] <dan2> she looks like she's a little kid pretending to drive
[22:39] <Trebbers> Make some Levon cutlets
[22:40] <autarch> Fauxlkswagen
[22:40] <dan2> lol
[22:40] <autarch> lol treb
[22:41] <Trebbers> loves getting cleaned up
[22:41] <autarch> dirty boy
[22:41] <autarch> she's gonna see him isn't she
[22:41] <dan2> I'm not sure how they get another hour out of this if thats the case
[22:42] <autarch> what's the point i burning it?
[22:42] <dan2> especially in a movie that's been pretty dedicated to only having 3 characters
[22:42] <Trebbers> Just toss the cap with your prints on it
[22:42] <autarch> shouldn't he put levon in there when he lights it on fire?
[22:42] <Trebbers> ahahah
[22:42] <@Ampersand> smoke steam bath
[22:42] <dan2> cool guys DO look back at explosions
[22:43] <dan2> equipment?
[22:43] <autarch> hahaha
[22:43] <autarch> this spaz
[22:43] <autarch> he did a shitty job
[22:44] <kayke> how do the cameras protect anything when it's clear people can walk in and steal things
[22:44] <kayke> closing the door might be a better solution
[22:44] <dan2> she was gonna use the first month's rent to buy a lock
[22:44] <Trebbers> how could he possibly have seen that
[22:45] <kayke> security app looks a lot like the email server
[22:45] <autarch> YES!
[22:45] <lhouse> gasp
[22:45] <autarch> Rise of Levon!
[22:45] <kayke> live on, levon!
[22:46] <lhouse> it can be a wiki full of feet
[22:46] <autarch> what is this video?
[22:46] <airbnbesoin> bruce springsteen and alan thicke's child
[22:46] <kayke> lol lhs
[22:46] <@Ampersand> here, these are grapes
[22:46] <autarch> lol lhs
[22:46] <autarch> no
[22:46] <dan2> some late night Booberry
[22:47] <@Ampersand> i know i criticized his hair styling before, but i don't like this either
[22:47] <@Ampersand> maybe he needs to go bald
[22:47] <dan2> one of those websites where you have to type words to scroll down
[22:47] <dan2> hate those
[22:47] <@Ampersand> still waiting for the kill
[22:47] <airbnbesoin> scream levon
[22:48] <autarch> he should have just left
[22:48] <Trebbers> oh cool
[22:48] <@Ampersand> cool party
[22:48] <dan2> And he shall freeze, Levon
[22:49] <Trebbers> ah
[22:49] <kayke> showering with make up and jewelry on
[22:49] <@Ampersand> "i knew it from the kids!"
[22:49] <Trebbers> weird egg tray
[22:49] <dan2> insane amounts of fruit in this
[22:49] <dan2> not that I'm against it
[22:50] <kayke> I'm the value
[22:50] <Trebbers> Ok, gonna be sexual harassment
[22:50] <airbnbesoin> 07??
[22:50] <autarch> '07
[22:50] <autarch> that seems about right
[22:50] <dan2> the guy in the back
[22:50] <dan2> holy shit
[22:51] <dan2> rewatch 38:25 onward if you missed it
[22:51] <Trebbers> damn
[22:51] <autarch> is it that guy in the blue jacket?
[22:52] <airbnbesoin> "live. laugh. love. how'd you come up with that one?"
[22:52] <autarch> time??
[22:52] <dan2> is this a dream?
[22:52] <kayke> lol besoin
[22:52] <dan2> 40:30
[22:53] <airbnbesoin> is there going to be one murder in this
[22:53] <autarch> i'm at 40:53
[22:53] <lhouse> levon died as he lived, so freaking cool
[22:53] <dan2> 41:10
[22:53] <Bob511> I mean, the one murder seems like it's been a real pain in the ass.
[22:53] <kayke> what if levon gets up again?
[22:53] <autarch> gimme 41:30
[22:53] <dan2> USB RIP
[22:53] <autarch> gimme 41:30
[22:53] <dan2> 41:30
[22:53] <autarch> thx
[22:53] <@Ampersand> 41:30
[22:54] <@Ampersand> 41:20
[22:54] <@Ampersand> yesss
[22:54] <autarch> is levon ok?
[22:54] <Trebbers> *dirt stirs
[22:54] <@Ampersand> he got usb'onked
[22:55] <autarch> this character
[22:55] <dan2> suddenly dubbed like a Giallo
[22:55] <Trebbers> OHHHHHHHH
[22:55] <autarch> coming on strong
[22:55] <airbnbesoin> stills camera
[22:56] <@Ampersand> proper hang out
[22:56] <autarch> can o' piss
[22:56] <autarch> hoot
[22:56] <lhouse> the perfect shoes for lawn walking
[22:56] <airbnbesoin> herd immunity party
[22:56] <autarch> was this in the elizabethtown soundtrack?
[22:56] <dan2> the head bobbing
[22:57] <@Ampersand> live performance
[22:57] <autarch> late 2000s wedding video
[22:57] <lhouse> what if the rest of this is just a romcom
[22:57] <kayke> they met on a site that was both for renting and dating
[22:57] <lhouse> A CAR IS MURDERED
[22:58] <Trebbers> Carsondaily.com
[22:58] <Bob511> "One homicide, for delivery."
[22:58] <dan2> I wonder if this dude does jawsercise
[22:58] <dan2> lol
[22:58] <Trebbers> thsi fucking guy
[22:59] <airbnbesoin> does this cop work for anonymous
[22:59] <Bob511> "Always on a jet plane."
[22:59] <kayke> levon town
[22:59] <lhouse> heh
[22:59] <dan2> looks like if Adam Driver got the nic cage role in Zandalee
[22:59] <Trebbers> hah
[22:59] <autarch> haha this detective
[22:59] <autarch> lol dan
[22:59] <airbnbesoin> "i curled my hair"
[22:59] <dan2> he definitely said pee
[23:00] <airbnbesoin> i heard pee too
[23:00] <dan2> DON'T DRINK IT
[23:00] <autarch> that's, uh, my special reciPee
[23:00] <Trebbers> Like that he's a fuck up from jump
[23:00] <airbnbesoin> what is his project even?
[23:01] <lhouse> the laundry room shared with the whole town
[23:01] <@Ampersand> "i think we all know it means missing USB"
[23:01] <Trebbers> how zany
[23:01] <autarch> WHAT
[23:01] <dan2> is there a gas leak in the house?
[23:01] <airbnbesoin> "netflix.ca and chill?"
[23:01] <autarch> missing socks turn into extra tupperware lids?
[23:01] <dan2> lool besoin
[23:02] <Trebbers> Rachel has fish eyes
[23:02] <Bob511> "Really just a quick pamphlet, the 737 MAX is basically identical."
[23:02] <Trebbers> "IS THIS USB?"
[23:02] <autarch> he brought an extra monitor
[23:02] <dan2> "yeah you're right, nobody is competing with this stuff"
[23:03] <dan2> wait...she's the same age as the millionaire guy??
[23:03] <@Ampersand> "do you do more than just rent?"
[23:03] <airbnbesoin> god, that face
[23:03] <dan2> highway to the major bone
[23:04] <Trebbers> ahahh
[23:04] <dan2> yes
[23:04] <dan2> this is how I cope
[23:04] <autarch> he needs to get moroe swole
[23:04] <@Ampersand> his decorating sense is the total death wish
[23:04] <airbnbesoin> i don't understand what mark wants
[23:04] <dan2> three little letters: U S B
[23:04] <@Ampersand> lol
[23:05] <lhouse> all his character motivation was established in killer downstairs
[23:06] <dan2> his eventual goal is to become the upstairs killer
[23:06] <dan2> and then the attic killer
[23:06] <airbnbesoin> why are all the sports cars in this from the 80s
[23:07] <autarch> wait, he followed really close
[23:07] <dan2> the windows
[23:07] <dan2> I can't take this
[23:07] <airbnbesoin> huh?
[23:07] <lhouse> it looks like a dog died and then a wedding happened in here
[23:07] <dan2> I am a rock, I am a vallllllllueeeeeeeee
[23:07] <Trebbers> ah
[23:08] <Trebbers> wait what kinda pictures is this
[23:08] <airbnbesoin> truly the height of photography
[23:08] <autarch> "you're hired!"
[23:09] <airbnbesoin> promo shots for the trisha paytas biopic
[23:09] <dan2> then Simms spends $20,000 photoshopping out the models so it can have clean pictures of those windows
[23:09] <autarch> god that outfit
[23:09] <autarch> Black v-neck with red blazer. Fuck me that's a horrible look.
[23:10] <dan2> just buy another USB stick online dude
[23:10] <dan2> they're very affordable
[23:10] <autarch> Dude looks like he's an uncle at Pajama Sam's graduation
[23:10] <dan2> lol
[23:10] <lhouse> he can just pretend he's napping
[23:11] <Trebbers> A fan of an agent
[23:11] <autarch> lol
[23:11] <airbnbesoin> jesus
[23:11] <@Ampersand> omg
[23:11] <airbnbesoin> fancy offices in an industrial park in richmond, bc
[23:11] <@Ampersand> Killer Fit
[23:11] <autarch> it is not
[23:12] <airbnbesoin> magnum p. die.
[23:12] <Trebbers> aha
[23:12] <airbnbesoin> did the license plate say "coastal state"
[23:12] <Trebbers> Suspence lessened bc you know nothing is going to happen to the car
[23:12] <dan2> either that or like "Central State"
[23:13] <Trebbers> Did they just yadda yadda a murder
[23:13] <dan2> lol
[23:13] <autarch> identical movie that also has this actress: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt6079060/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_14
[23:13] <airbnbesoin> hope you like kay jewelers
[23:13] <dan2> how comes the man I let live in my guest house never did this for my birthday? >:(
[23:14] <airbnbesoin> what if the personal assistant is there
[23:15] <autarch> you have a guest house?
[23:15] <lhouse> getting typecast as a property owner
[23:15] <@Ampersand> lol
[23:15] <autarch> lol
[23:15] <airbnbesoin> "no, levon martinez"
[23:16] <@Ampersand> yes, i am a landlord
[23:16] <@Ampersand> hi, i'm cop
[23:17] <@Ampersand> anonymoustips.net
[23:17] <lhouse> police.com
[23:17] <autarch> dude tore the label off that bottle of water
[23:17] <dan2> more backstore on the boogie guy
[23:17] <dan2> 6
[23:17] <dan2> 7
[23:17] <airbnbesoin> hasn't aged a day since 1983
[23:17] <@Ampersand> going to rach-hell
[23:17] <dan2> whoa I can't type
[23:18] <dan2> whole lot of stress push-ups incoming
[23:18] <airbnbesoin> what the hell is this party
[23:18] <airbnbesoin> looks like they're trying out for jeopardy
[23:18] <@Ampersand> a student 40 years agi
[23:18] <lhouse> it's the adult video awards episode of party down
[23:18] <autarch> ugh
[23:19] <@Ampersand> def thought Party Down too
[23:19] <airbnbesoin> baghdad is not in afghanistan
[23:19] <autarch> hell yeah roger
[23:19] <autarch> er, robert
[23:19] <airbnbesoin> ah god that's awful
[23:19] <Trebbers> oh my god
[23:19] <autarch> that's terrible
[23:19] <@Ampersand> it stinks
[23:19] <Trebbers> Cover of what
[23:19] <Bob511> Seriously
[23:19] <autarch> unbelievable
[23:19] <autarch> how is he her hero
[23:20] <lhouse> the cover of magazine magazine
[23:20] <@Ampersand> this song
[23:20] <kayke> boogie
[23:20] <autarch> lol
[23:20] <@Ampersand> is
[23:20] <@Ampersand> the song
[23:20] <dan2> finally the boogie!
[23:20] <Trebbers> boogie lord
[23:20] <@Ampersand> Morris Day and The Maybe Next Time
[23:20] <airbnbesoin> the "deadly" series puts this shit to shame
[23:20] <lhouse> i'm starting to think he's not actually a pilot
[23:20] <autarch> although I guess it was her who took the picture, maybe he's actually good
[23:20] <dan2> things in canada go at a more relaxed pace, including the lifetime thrillers
[23:20] <lhouse> time to DIE
[23:21] <autarch> how didn't he se see him
[23:21] <Bob511> I guess he...hung up.
[23:21] <@Ampersand> Metal Gear Tenant
[23:21] <dan2> nomally when you want to kill Simms you just delete the ladder while they're in the swimming pool
[23:21] <@Ampersand> omg
[23:21] <@Ampersand> party is lit
[23:21] <Bob511> Ha
[23:21] <lhouse> now stick him in the freezer just to be sure
[23:21] <autarch> was it because he said iraq was an unnecessary wawr?
[23:21] <airbnbesoin> these fashion industry parties are so wild
[23:21] <Trebbers> So well lit
[23:21] <@Ampersand> this isn't a pig roast
[23:22] <Bob511> A perfect likeness.
[23:22] <autarch> what
[23:22] <autarch> how
[23:22] <Trebbers> Lady detective sounds like text to speech
[23:22] <airbnbesoin> then robert committed suicide by strangling himself with piano wire
[23:22] <Bob511> Really could not be anyone else.
[23:22] <dan2> whoa
[23:22] <autarch> how did he get robert's coat?
[23:22] <Trebbers> ahah
[23:22] <autarch> looks like a hanging
[23:23] <Trebbers> OPEN AND SHUT
[23:23] <lhouse> he stole it from his desk chair
[23:23] <airbnbesoin> what a birthday
[23:23] <dan2> handwriting looked like the notes mom would leave in my lunchbox
[23:23] <Trebbers> 30, ok
[23:23] <@Ampersand> Landlord at 30
[23:23] <airbnbesoin> "dear dan, i'm sorry, i can't do this anymore, - m. o. m."
[23:23] <autarch> so wait
[23:24] <autarch> the story is that Robert killed Levon, and then Levon left a note at Robert's suicide?
[23:24] <Trebbers> yeah
[23:24] <autarch> WHAT?!
[23:24] <dan2> as long as the boogie king isn't implicated
[23:24] <Bob511> The note was signed R.S.
[23:24] <airbnbesoin> this would be a great time for him to fly somewhere
[23:25] <Trebbers> No, he left a note apologizing to Levon
[23:25] <autarch> So robert killed Levon? and then Levon came back as a ghost and scared Robert so bad that he hung himself?
[23:25] <lhouse> the handwriting matches the fruit salad notes
[23:25] <autarch> and then Levon left a note apologizing for it?
[23:25] <airbnbesoin> it was the guilt. the tell tale douche.
[23:25] <Trebbers> you got it now
[23:25] <Trebbers> how did he not
[23:26] <airbnbesoin> why would the security videos be on the usb key?
[23:26] <autarch> just call the detectives now
[23:26] <autarch> ah yes
[23:26] <dan2> that face
[23:26] <autarch> put it up on the big screen
[23:26] <airbnbesoin> maybe try 911 genius
[23:26] <lhouse> that's a more interesting photo than the other window one
[23:26] <autarch> LEAVE A MESSAGE
[23:26] <Trebbers> leave the message
[23:26] <autarch> JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
[23:26] <autarch> what the fuck was that
[23:27] <autarch> you already know what happened
[23:27] <dan2> Mark is kind of an evil Jesse Palmer: https://imagesvc.meredithcorp.io/v3/mm/image?url=https%3A%2F%2Fstatic.onecms.io%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2Fsites%2F20%2F2018%2F11%2Fjesse-palmer-2000.jpg
[23:27] <autarch> that thing still has batteries?
[23:27] <airbnbesoin> this guy has terrible opsec
[23:28] <autarch> dude, call 911
[23:28] <autarch> what the fuck are you waiting for
[23:28] <autarch> if she doesn't call 911 in the next 15 seconds, she deserves to die
[23:29] <airbnbesoin> sd card?
[23:29] <@Ampersand> tenant's rights
[23:29] <dan2> what
[23:29] <Bob511> Why did he listen?
[23:29] <airbnbesoin> finally did something interesting with her camera
[23:29] <Trebbers> what did she throw?
[23:29] <Trebbers> ah ok
[23:29] <autarch> that made no sense, physically
[23:29] <dan2> uh oh, he's turning into Patrick Warburton when he gets enraged
[23:30] <airbnbesoin> max bright is something i truly wish i could erase from my memory
[23:30] <autarch> that was too easy
[23:30] <dan2> Whistler's Murder
[23:31] <airbnbesoin> he put on a pleather jacket
[23:31] <@Ampersand> wattur
[23:31] <autarch> he's gonna waterboard her
[23:31] <airbnbesoin> what was his motivation in killer downstairs? i didn't see that one
[23:31] <lhouse> just a hobby, I guess
[23:32] <Bob511> Did anyone?
[23:32] <airbnbesoin> good thing you didn't leave a message incriminating this guy
[23:33] <airbnbesoin> what a coinkydink
[23:33] <Bob511> "Jim...Brueur?
[23:33] <dan2> oh no
[23:34] <@Ampersand> wow
[23:34] <airbnbesoin> wow
[23:34] <airbnbesoin> finish his ass
[23:34] <@Ampersand> what a way to go
[23:34] <autarch> now run
[23:34] <autarch> go
[23:34] <@Ampersand> smile
[23:34] <dan2> Can-dead Camera
[23:34] <autarch> wait
[23:34] <autarch> that did it?
[23:34] <lhouse> gotta upload them to instagram first
[23:35] <@Ampersand> the one time the friend survives, huh?
[23:35] <autarch> so is this spicy cop gonna take his shot now?
[23:35] <dan2> still alive for more
[23:35] <Bob511> A serious shapeshifter, deputy Van Dyke there has been chasing him all the way from his episode of Supernatural.
[23:35] <kayke> can you guys boogie a little bit
[23:35] <airbnbesoin> what the hell
[23:36] <@Ampersand> "creeps"
[23:36] <Trebbers> ELECTRIC KISS OF A KILLER
[23:36] <dan2> demolish the guest house and turn it into a memorial for Levon
[23:36] <autarch> you'd think that the director of this movie would be better at photography, or at least the camera crew
[23:36] <Bob511> So it turned out there was a killer in the main house, too.
[23:36] <autarch> so, james was definitely in a CW or ABC Family show, right?
[23:36] <airbnbesoin> this music
[23:37] <Bob511> He was on Arrow, yeah.
[23:37] <lhouse> thanks again, canada
[23:37] <autarch> lol you can always just tell by the face
[23:37] <dan2> thanks as always to canada
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Postby Ampersand » Thu Sep 10, 2020 2:40 pm

Next time:
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 13, 2020 12:09 pm

bump. tonight!
get your texting hand ready
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 13, 2020 4:37 pm

T E X T
"K I L L"
T O
J O E - 3 0 3 3 0
T O
J O I N
U S
T O N I G H T
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 13, 2020 8:01 pm

1 hour (to kill!)
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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 13, 2020 8:48 pm

TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
TEXT TO KILL

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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 13, 2020 9:02 pm

Ampersand wrote:TONIGHT'S FEATURE PRESENTATION:
TEXT TO KILL

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Postby Ampersand » Sun Sep 13, 2020 10:41 pm

Code: Select all
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 3
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 2
[22:14] <@Ampersand> 1
[22:15] <besoin> all movies should start with thunder
[22:15] <dvr> shit i thought this was a comedy
[22:15] <donnamartin> this movie starts like final destination
[22:15] <Bob511> That's what happens when you text and kill and drive.
[22:15] <besoin> thought that was joey jeremiah for a sec
[22:15] <autarch> Ampersand, can we watch the halloweentown movies this october?
[22:15] <pretty_yeoman> gonna tell my kids this was The Mummy
[22:15] <dan2> farewell, Perfect Nanny
[22:16] <@Ampersand> i will say we can definitely watch at least one Halloweentown movie
[22:16] <donnamartin> did anyone have those school groups in hs that would stage drunk driving car crahes to send a message?
[22:16] <@Ampersand> kayke would punish me otherwise
[22:16] <dvr> is this ahh.. Hallmark, or whatever channel ?
[22:16] <dvr> Lifetime
[22:16] <pretty_yeoman> yeah donna they brought a wrecked car to the HS parking lot once
[22:16] <besoin> it's johnny mnemonic's dina meyer
[22:16] <autarch> Thank you Amp, and thank you Kayke
[22:16] <dvr> no way. way too big budget
[22:17] <besoin> daaaavvvveeeee noooooo
[22:17] <dan2> weird how she seemed cocky about going to look at the car crash beforehand
[22:17] <besoin> everyone who dies in a car accident just looks asleep
[22:17] <dvr> maybe he's okay
[22:17] <text2kayke> I don't understand this crash, how many cars were involved
[22:17] <besoin> not like 17 lbs of hamburger
[22:17] <autarch> great opening credits
[22:18] <donnamartin> so hard to wake up with lovely curls and eyeliner
[22:18] <dan2> not so sure about this font though
[22:18] <besoin> you have nightmares if you don't take your makeup off before sleeping
[22:18] <text2kayke> love means never having to say you're sorry
[22:18] <pretty_yeoman> this font is incredible
[22:18] <donnamartin> that's some google docs font
[22:18] <besoin> why is it sped up
[22:18] <dvr> is the daughter older than mom?
[22:18] <lhs> benny hills
[22:18] <besoin> is it 2049 now
[22:18] <pretty_yeoman> it is outside my house atm
[22:19] <besoin> god, she looked right at us
[22:19] <besoin> "we were friends in grade 23, but this is grade 27 now"
[22:19] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[22:19] <text2kayke> lol
[22:19] <lhs> even forever ends, I guess
[22:19] <dan2> to me, that's more of a bragging point than 2nd sleaziest date in town
[22:20] <text2kayke> my cop could beat up your cop
[22:20] <donnamartin> why is she dressed like a PTA mom
[22:20] <autarch> jfc
[22:20] <dan2> so good for her
[22:20] <@Ampersand> so her mom rules, your mom drools?
[22:20] <besoin> C
[22:20] <autarch> AMAB
[22:20] <@Ampersand> Clark Kent over here isn't fooling me
[22:20] <pretty_yeoman> heh
[22:20] <text2kayke> lol
[22:20] <dvr> heh
[22:21] <Trebbers> "Doing"
[22:21] <@Ampersand> bad stache
[22:21] <donnamartin> chicks, man
[22:21] <pretty_yeoman> did he say "bad blood Tim Taylor"?
[22:21] <Trebbers> This exposition is confusing me
[22:21] <besoin> glasses looks like a young totally
[22:21] <Trebbers> holy shit
[22:21] <autarch> yeah, i thought "doing" was funny too, treb
[22:21] <@Ampersand> swallowing own loogie
[22:21] <lhs> mazes and monsters later?
[22:21] <text2kayke> doing it and doing it and doing it well
[22:21] <@Ampersand> ol
[22:21] <pretty_yeoman> u no it lhs
[22:21] <besoin> ana de armless
[22:22] <Trebbers> a rave
[22:22] <pretty_yeoman> can you crash a- nvm
[22:22] <dan2> tell me when she gets the text
[22:22] <Trebbers> what the hell is going on in america now
[22:22] <dan2> I need to sync
[22:22] <Trebbers> 730 in 10
[22:22] <text2kayke> dooey zashnelle
[22:22] <@Ampersand> text to intimidate
[22:22] <Trebbers> 730
[22:22] <dan2> I'm watching a different rip it turns out
[22:22] <pretty_yeoman> it's the home invasion guy from every fox news channel home security system ad
[22:22] <donnamartin> director's commentary, dan?
[22:23] <text2kayke> turtles: I'm watching you
[22:23] <besoin> COL
[22:23] <donnamartin> her text alerts are so foreboding
[22:23] <pretty_yeoman> it's just a Venmo bot
[22:23] <dan2> the tv rips are much better than webrips of Lifetime movies because you get to see the little advertisements for upcoming Lifetime movies in the corner
[22:23] <donnamartin> she knows what you did last summer duh
[22:23] <autarch> Loving the sound effects on this OS
[22:23] <dvr> she talks and types like sandra
[22:23] <autarch> doing doing
[22:23] <dan2> blooBOOP
[22:24] <besoin> A
[22:24] <dvr> "ok class, here's a car crash problem"
[22:24] <autarch> wow, i guess science IS kind of hip
[22:24] <donnamartin> are we really getting a science lesson in this movie?
[22:24] <pretty_yeoman> well, not really but yeah
[22:24] <@Ampersand> I'M TEXTING YOU
[22:24] <pretty_yeoman> lol amp
[22:24] <Bob511> Truth AND lies?
[22:25] <text2kayke> tooth and eyes
[22:25] <@Ampersand> hers said "i'll pluck out your eyeballs and eat them like grapes"
[22:25] <besoin> radio rebel again
[22:25] <Trebbers> Is hannah a teacher
[22:25] <autarch> is hannah like 26?
[22:25] <donnamartin> is she a 15th year senior?
[22:25] <text2kayke> why does she dress like a reality tv show host
[22:25] <autarch> she honestly looks like she could be my mom
[22:25] <lhs> she's this school's clueless amber
[22:25] <autarch> age-wise
[22:26] <donnamartin> amber was a better dresser
[22:26] <besoin> hannah should comment on taylor's highlights
[22:26] <dvr> the "cleeks?"
[22:26] <besoin> big canada-ism just now
[22:26] <donnamartin> love a good movie bad boy
[22:26] <besoin> pronouncing cliques CLEEKS
[22:26] <@Ampersand> read that as Big Brother Canada-ism
[22:26] <text2kayke> degrassi: text generation
[22:27] <Bob511> Heh
[22:27] <lhs> it's a french word, why not
[22:27] <dan2> RJ Mitte Without a Cause
[22:27] <besoin> what the hell
[22:27] <text2kayke> kick out the extras
[22:27] <donnamartin> wait, why do they have to move?
[22:27] <dvr> lower on the popularity totem pole
[22:28] <Trebbers> "I was taking a shit, and he knew I was taking a shit!"
[22:28] <donnamartin> did she sleep with her boyfriend too?
[22:28] <Trebbers> Just a board of random bodies
[22:28] <autarch> is "lower on the totem pole" a saying in the UK too?
[22:28] <donnamartin> come see my dead body artwork
[22:29] <Trebbers> In the insurgence?
[22:29] <autarch> insurgence?
[22:29] <besoin> internet text logs
[22:29] <pretty_yeoman> they do a lot of texting in Philly
[22:29] <pretty_yeoman> internet texting
[22:29] <donnamartin> texting is blowing up in philly
[22:29] <besoin> actually he doesn't
[22:29] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[22:29] <text2kayke> hmmm, the philly answer is yes
[22:29] <donnamartin> love a good law and order moment
[22:30] <@Ampersand> you'd need a hacker
[22:30] <Trebbers> Wizards
[22:30] <pretty_yeoman> "I'll call my friend Sandra."
[22:30] <dan2> "Uh yes, wizardry is complicated. Duh."
[22:30] <lhs> we can sit down, drink some gibsons
[22:30] <Bob511> "You'd need a very awkward-looking giant guy..."
[22:30] <dvr> lol
[22:30] <pretty_yeoman> oh no
[22:30] <text2kayke> lol bob
[22:30] <besoin> taylor looks like she's doing jonbenet ramsey cosplay
[22:30] <pretty_yeoman> this is the score from Stigmata
[22:31] <besoin> no way he can use that little phone with his gloves on
[22:31] <Trebbers> Fancy leather texting gloves
[22:31] <Trebbers> Why is that guy cast as the hunk
[22:31] <Bob511> Very well-lit nighttime car interior.
[22:31] <donnamartin> is this a movie about the dangers of car computers?
[22:31] <dan2> she's mad the camera angle doesn't let her see dong
[22:31] <besoin> maybe get some curtains
[22:31] <Trebbers> "Why did you fuck in my cab?"
[22:32] <text2kayke> so stealthy she didn't see him in the front seat of the car
[22:32] <besoin> zack's insignia so far: C, A, fleur de lis
[22:32] <pretty_yeoman> as long as he doesn't show up in a Q sweater
[22:32] <donnamartin> i mean, you did leave her for her best friend
[22:32] <Trebbers> Was his letterman jacket for curling or golf
[22:32] <pretty_yeoman> knitting
[22:32] <dan2> lol
[22:32] <Trebbers> h
[22:32] <Trebbers> a
[22:33] <pretty_yeoman> minor key trumpet fanfare is for when you get a bad text
[22:33] <besoin> yowza
[22:33] <Trebbers> Damn
[22:33] <donnamartin> maybe this movie is awarning about town survellience cameras
[22:33] <lhs> who knew that teens were having sex
[22:33] <Bob511> So many elbows grabbed already.
[22:34] <besoin> beat it, NPCs
[22:34] <Trebbers> Extras, leave
[22:34] <dan2> classic text prank
[22:34] <besoin> the video from inside that guy's car is a little different than a video through blinds
[22:34] <donnamartin> they need angela lansbery
[22:35] <text2kayke> just tell them honey
[22:35] <text2kayke> it's 20whatever
[22:35] <besoin> looks like luigi's
[22:35] <autarch> this is why you should never have sex
[22:35] <donnamartin> i wonder if the new detective from philly is doing this to teach the town a lesson
[22:35] <@Ampersand> *shows her photo of Momo*
[22:35] <donnamartin> i'm fucking your ghost dad
[22:35] <lhs> heh
[22:35] <Bob511> "...and I keep saying he's from Canada, and you wouldn't know him, and you say 'but we're in....'"
[22:36] <@Ampersand> "mmgay:
[22:36] <besoin> taylor has that little reese witherspoon croquet wicket on her forehead
[22:36] <donnamartin> how do you get a lifetime movie screenwriter job
[22:37] <donnamartin> wait, i thought the teens were always more advanced than the cops. shouj'dnt they know how to trace texts
[22:37] <dan2> I think you just erase and fill in old scripts, Mad Libs style
[22:37] <dvr> only the wizard
[22:37] <autarch> what else is she in?
[22:38] <Trebbers> Gandrew Carfield
[22:38] <dan2> the :) working wonders
[22:38] <besoin> andrew odie
[22:38] <lhs> cody in another of his weirdly laminated denim jackets
[22:38] <Trebbers> Cybostalker
[22:38] <text2kayke> lol
[22:39] <autarch> lol
[22:39] <besoin> naturally it's young totally
[22:39] <donnamartin> oh man the computer geek. it was him all along
[22:39] <autarch> stalked by my texter
[22:39] <lhs> he's just having a staring context with his own reflection
[22:39] <autarch> u gotta watch out for those computer nerds
[22:39] <donnamartin> okay, i knew i knew the mom from somewhere. friends and starship troopers
[22:39] <dvr> starship troopers!
[22:39] <besoin> taylor is the voice of polly pocket
[22:40] <donnamartin> i bet the computer nerd is on some lame message board
[22:40] <besoin> she's literally the voice of polly pocket
[22:40] <autarch> she's rachel friends?
[22:40] <dvr> and yeah recognize her from friends
[22:40] <besoin> she was in johnny mnemonic!
[22:40] <dvr> rachel's sister or something?
[22:41] <donnamartin> she was kate, who dated chandler and joey
[22:41] <text2kayke> hanging out in front of the giant windows when you're being stalked
[22:41] <dvr> oh
[22:41] <pretty_yeoman> she needs to be careful or it's going to be curtains for her
[22:41] <besoin> good thing her curtains have 18% opacity
[22:41] <text2kayke> to be fair, it looks like her house is mainly windows
[22:41] <donnamartin> i love how lifetime movies always look like staged model homes
[22:41] <pretty_yeoman> i am -in love- with these commercial cuts
[22:41] <dvr> wow that runner was really leaning
[22:42] <lhs> how many jackets can one teen have
[22:42] <text2kayke> "can I ask you something: are my pants and shirt too similar in color?"
[22:42] <@Ampersand> Dinkward Cullen
[22:42] <Trebbers> yeah
[22:42] <dvr> 27:00 for forward leaning runner reminder
[22:42] <donnamartin> oh i bet the video is calling out his jacket fetish
[22:42] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[22:42] <pretty_yeoman> "expelled for too many jackets"
[22:43] <dan2> "I beat his ass and all his werewolf buddies too."
[22:43] <Trebbers> Hell yeah reinforce that shit
[22:43] <donnamartin> lets make out and have someone video it
[22:43] <dan2> this guy should play Wreck-It-Ralphs son
[22:43] <Trebbers> ah
[22:43] <donnamartin> is he gonna break out into one week any minute now?
[22:44] <lhs> what is that goon's motivation
[22:44] <autarch> lol
[22:44] <pretty_yeoman> I think when I was in college there was a dude who looked just like computer guy living in my dorm
[22:44] <Trebbers> what is this
[22:44] <pretty_yeoman> Texted by Kylo Ren
[22:44] <besoin> probably the son of the people in the other car in the accident
[22:44] <donnamartin> It's been One Week since you texted me...
[22:44] <besoin> heh
[22:44] <dvr> heh
[22:44] <pretty_yeoman> *waggles eyebrows*
[22:44] <autarch> google: how to get rid of freaks
[22:44] <besoin> it's emeril!
[22:44] <Trebbers> Garth Vader
[22:44] <autarch> lol
[22:44] <pretty_yeoman> fuck yeah time to organize
[22:45] <dan2> another side effect of these all being model homes is that it makes it seems like they're calling each other from the same house
[22:45] <besoin> "he said he was going to kick things up a notch and also BAM!"
[22:45] <donnamartin> lol
[22:45] <pretty_yeoman> their high school is wearing Lyle Lanley's hat from Marge vs. the Monorail
[22:45] <donnamartin> my dad made his own emeril's essence spice
[22:45] <dvr> one of the rooms from these movies looked like it was in a hotel (from the hallway outside the room)
[22:45] <donnamartin> oh man it's like harry potter
[22:46] <besoin> C guy dresses like a nut
[22:46] <dvr> lol
[22:46] <Trebbers> What is that jacket dress combo
[22:46] <autarch> Da Freak
[22:46] <lhs> each character wears a different collection from kohl's
[22:46] <pretty_yeoman> oof
[22:46] <Trebbers> woah, sweater + letterman jacket
[22:46] <donnamartin> he's gotta be hot
[22:46] <pretty_yeoman> sweaterman's jacket
[22:46] <dan2> he assembled the school's computer lab?
[22:46] <donnamartin> cody's stach is everything
[22:46] <autarch> ok that's clearly the guy
[22:46] <dvr> ( i assembled a computer lab over a summer between high school years)
[22:46] <donnamartin> why did they let a student set up the computer lab?
[22:47] <besoin> this guy's outfit is something else
[22:47] <dan2> it's 100% Andrew Odie
[22:47] <donnamartin> ookay i take it back
[22:47] <Trebbers> And a v-neck
[22:47] <lhs> another cody scene, another jacket
[22:47] <Trebbers> amazing
[22:47] <text2kayke> the bright red v neck is making me mad
[22:47] <text2kayke> what is he doing
[22:47] <donnamartin> extremely subtle
[22:47] <@Ampersand> i would 100% wear that
[22:47] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[22:47] <autarch> 4144
[22:47] <Trebbers> waoh
[22:47] <donnamartin> wait they let a student have this?
[22:47] <autarch> write that down
[22:47] <besoin> they seem to have a bunch of audio equipment instead of servers
[22:48] <lhs> if i were a lifetime screenwriter, i would make sure that no one ever said "out"
[22:48] <besoin> C's v-neck means this is a red herring
[22:48] <dvr> hrm a weasel wizard
[22:48] <pretty_yeoman> ok everyone, like, check him out but like don't like check him out, you know?
[22:48] <autarch> gif of that
[22:48] <donnamartin> just ... call the principal?
[22:48] <pretty_yeoman> Blark Zuckerberg
[22:49] <dan2> Text m
[22:49] <besoin> are they going to enlist his help
[22:49] <Trebbers> His eyebrows are nuts
[22:49] <donnamartin> dude, fucking tell the principal
[22:49] <text2kayke> he's gonna hulk out
[22:49] <donnamartin> i mean, he does actually
[22:49] <besoin> yeah, what this guy is doing is worse than the main mystery
[22:49] <Trebbers> "McGill won't touch you"
[22:49] <donnamartin> this is not how to handle this at all
[22:49] <pretty_yeoman> ouch, Trebbers
[22:49] <dan2> the crazy thing is he's probably a good 3" taller if he fixes his posture
[22:49] <autarch> they let him off witth a warning?
[22:50] <Bob511> Huh?
[22:50] <donnamartin> great scene, A+
[22:50] <pretty_yeoman> the layers at this school go deep
[22:50] <donnamartin> these kids are dumb as hell
[22:50] <besoin> more gauzy curtains
[22:50] <dan2> de-stress with a coffee and calzone
[22:50] <pretty_yeoman> dying at "from facebook to instagram!"
[22:51] <dvr> it will be "from myspace to xanga" eventually
[22:51] <Trebbers> how can they tell it's her
[22:51] <lhs> just tell your parents that you were out of your gourd on drugs, they'll get it
[22:51] <pretty_yeoman> fuck, just own it
[22:51] <text2kayke> what year is this that these kids are even phased
[22:51] <autarch> wait
[22:51] <pretty_yeoman> I mean this *does* look like the suburbs
[22:51] <autarch> her nam is BARB?!
[22:51] <donnamartin> depends on the town in 2015
[22:52] <pretty_yeoman> oh god I thought she was running -in- to the liquor store
[22:52] <Trebbers> would have been great
[22:52] <lhs> also is this like the second gay lifetime character we've had
[22:52] <besoin> who the hell
[22:52] <Bob511> Liquor store and funeral home.
[22:52] <autarch> who s this hero?
[22:52] <Trebbers> It's this guy
[22:52] <donnamartin> these kids don't handle anything well
[22:52] <autarch> Kiss
[22:52] <dan2> this kid rules
[22:52] <text2kayke> let's see more of that kid
[22:52] <pretty_yeoman> how is it over for Barb she doesn't even have any parents
[22:52] <besoin> (?)
[22:52] <text2kayke> lol yeoman
[22:52] <autarch> "barb, it's going to be ok. I've met a hero. He will save us."
[22:53] <dan2> thank god they still don't have internet in Hawaii
[22:53] <besoin> taylor's bed is a horror show
[22:53] <pretty_yeoman> lol autarch
[22:53] <besoin> just go over there
[22:53] <text2kayke> barb has a lot of internalized shit she needs to work through
[22:53] <Trebbers> No police in canada huh
[22:53] <besoin> boy the wee hours
[22:54] <dvr> zoom in on the blue backpack thing in the corner
[22:54] <dan2> we have a possible murder via text
[22:54] <besoin> taylor didn't try that hard to save barb
[22:54] <pretty_yeoman> why do shows about teens always take out the Barbs first
[22:54] <pretty_yeoman> dammit, first Stranger Things Barb now this
[22:55] <autarch> fuck
[22:55] <Trebbers> 'could'
[22:55] <besoin> why does her address have 5 numbers? does she live on I-10?
[22:55] <donnamartin> aww man, barb was the best one
[22:55] <autarch> yeah, she was
[22:55] <Bob511> Off to better things on YouTube Red
[22:55] <lhs> i grew up in a culdesac in a house with 5 numbers
[22:55] <Trebbers> Wait, how long would that call take
[22:56] <lhs> way to kill off one of your only gay characters just for being gay, lifetime
[22:56] <besoin> do we think this all will have something to do with the victims in the other car in the car crash
[22:57] <besoin> although i don't remember if barb had any part in that
[22:57] <donnamartin> oh that would be very Urban Legend
[22:57] <dan2> I did read that Lifetime is breaking ground with a gay Christmas movie this year
[22:57] <text2kayke> what if barb was bi
[22:58] <text2kayke> barb never really clarified
[22:58] <@Ampersand> text to mourn
[22:58] <autarch>  what is this?
[22:58] <besoin> these outfits
[22:58] <pretty_yeoman> oh no Ampersand
[22:58] <donnamartin> teenage suicide....don't do it!
[22:58] <Trebbers> Why is she standing there
[22:58] <@Ampersand> My Mourning Jacket
[22:58] <dvr> llol
[22:58] <donnamartin> wait, what kind of funeral is this
[22:58] <lhs> haha
[22:58] <besoin> heh
[22:58] <donnamartin> omg amp
[22:58] <text2kayke> lol
[22:58] <autarch> lmao amp
[22:58] <pretty_yeoman> fuck god damn Amp
[22:58] <Trebbers> Is this how Canadians do this
[22:59] <besoin> she just sits there with her laptop wide open
[22:59] <dan2> I swear the sound effect when the killer texts is from The Circle
[22:59] <donnamartin> what if this is her dad coming back from the dead
[22:59] <Trebbers> ahahh
[22:59] <autarch> jfc
[22:59] <besoin> i think it's from the opening theme song of poirot, dan
[23:00] <besoin> "remember that movie sliver? no?"
[23:00] <donnamartin> okay but again, this is NOT LEGA
[23:00] <pretty_yeoman> whoa Sliver
[23:00] <donnamartin> tell the copys
[23:00] <Bob511> Or at least tell them to go to the bathroom at home.
[23:00] <dan2> the killer might be Mario because these murder meet-ups are great for business
[23:00] <donnamartin> these kids are so dumb
[23:01] <donnamartin> you should probably tell her now
[23:01] <donnamartin> these kids suck at this stuff
[23:01] <pretty_yeoman> is she just forgetting the attempted murder by car
[23:01] <donnamartin> uh, what a time to kiss
[23:01] <Trebbers> what writing
[23:01] <text2kayke> stay here? outside the parking garage?
[23:01] <pretty_yeoman> "If we're not married to anyone else by the time we're 30 (next year)... you wanna get hitched?"
[23:01] <@Ampersand> stay here 4eva
[23:02] <@Ampersand> validate my parking 4eva
[23:02] <autarch> lol amp
[23:02] <besoin> wish i could stay here in front of this municipal building in kamloops forever
[23:02] <Bob511> Canada has such brightly colorful wanted posters.
[23:02] <autarch> I was gonna say "ill love u 5ever"
[23:03] <text2kayke> it's usually a case when someone dies, isn't it
[23:03] <Trebbers> "The gunshots suggest otherwise"
[23:03] <@Ampersand> "Women, you know"
[23:03] <@Ampersand> omg my mom is sexist
[23:03] <autarch> the fairer sex, etc
[23:03] <besoin> "women usually mess it up"
[23:03] <Bob511> Did Barb seem like she would be so Impulse-ive?
[23:03] <text2kayke> "maybe it's a gay thing, we don't know"
[23:03] <@Ampersand> lol
[23:03] <donnamartin> why is no one considering ghost dad
[23:03] <besoin> jacket number 11
[23:03] <@Ampersand> OMG
[23:04] <@Ampersand> A HOODIE AND A JACKET
[23:04] <besoin> excuse me, 11 and 12
[23:04] <besoin> O
[23:04] <@Ampersand> i thought it was just a hoodie for a second
[23:04] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[23:04] <pretty_yeoman> 04
[23:04] <besoin> C, A, fleur de lis, 04
[23:04] <donnamartin> say that louder for the bleacher
[23:04] <@Ampersand> i have to agree
[23:04] <autarch> [the stalker] "You were wearing an O shirt today, well tomorrow, I will show the whole world your O face"
[23:05] <besoin> yellow notebook man looks suspicious
[23:05] <Trebbers> is this a new ringtone
[23:05] <@Ampersand> her mom is the killer
[23:05] <@Ampersand> calling it now
[23:05] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[23:05] <text2kayke> I hope it's not the black friend who has been in 2 scenes
[23:05] <besoin> he seems involved somehow
[23:05] <dvr> ya the mom's black gloves during the investigation
[23:05] <pretty_yeoman> the only thing stopping her mom from going full TRUTH AND LIES was her dad
[23:05] <dan2> killing them all off to get more screentime
[23:05] <autarch> is he on the set of V for Vendetta?
[23:06] <dvr> lol..
[23:06] <autarch> doing it
[23:06] <pretty_yeoman> extreme wine mom
[23:06] <donnamartin> good lord, calm down MILF
[23:06] <Trebbers> what kinda of house they got going on here
[23:06] <besoin> close your friggin' laptops, guys
[23:06] <pretty_yeoman> oh no time for another one of his cam loops
[23:06] <dan2> he's fully into the Delocated voice
[23:07] <@Ampersand> that's what... sje said
[23:07] <Trebbers> ahahahahaha
[23:07] <@Ampersand> slow hump
[23:07] <besoin> "an adult having sex!"
[23:07] <donnamartin> her mom dresses like that for a night in with wine?
[23:07] <Trebbers> "Not bad"
[23:07] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[23:07] <dan2> oh ho ho no way
[23:07] <Trebbers> Party foul
[23:07] <@Ampersand> White Zin Down
[23:07] <besoin> relax, music
[23:07] <donnamartin> red red wiiine
[23:07] <autarch> amp lol
[23:07] <pretty_yeoman> relax, slo mo
[23:07] <donnamartin> she took her costume cues from samantha jones
[23:07] <pretty_yeoman> a wine mom has been besmirched
[23:08] <besoin> i'm not sure the philly detective isn't involved
[23:08] <pretty_yeoman> like, what kind of sex is not shameful, in Lifetime's eyes?
[23:08] <besoin> we're running out of characters
[23:08] <autarch> who is this
[23:08] <dvr> i think other person in car crash was the best guess (retracting mom)
[23:08] <@Ampersand> yeoman: missionary
[23:08] <@Ampersand> between a sheet
[23:08] <text2kayke> in philly we make our own crimes to investigate
[23:08] <besoin> but who are the alive people acting on their behalf, dvr
[23:08] <dan2> whoever bullybarp
[23:08] <dvr> they really just need a wizard on the case
[23:09] <pretty_yeoman> missionary, under a sheet, married, without doll
[23:09] <Bob511> "Now, if your bathrooms were secretly recorded because you allowed one student to have full control over campus computers...."
[23:09] <Bob511> "....then that would be a failure."
[23:09] <autarch> consensual sex between main characters, yeoman
[23:09] <besoin> is the principal wearing leather pants
[23:09] <Trebbers> It's canada
[23:09] <text2kayke> they need the code for the perv closet
[23:09] <dvr> "larry work set up"
[23:09] <Trebbers> "A larryworks?"
[23:09] <besoin> wouldn't he have taken it all down
[23:10] <autarch> lol it does seem canadian
[23:10] <pretty_yeoman> yeah dvr that took me a minute
[23:10] <donnamartin> can't they just turn on the lights?
[23:10] <pretty_yeoman> yesssssss
[23:10] <autarch> moves mouse "i'm in"
[23:10] <text2kayke> just looking at powered down computers with a flashlight
[23:10] <besoin> what's with the flashlight? just turn on the lights
[23:10] <pretty_yeoman> please gratuitous hacking scene
[23:10] <text2kayke> we're in
[23:10] <pretty_yeoman> *nods*
[23:10] <Trebbers> IM IN
[23:11] <dan2> this kid has Girl Wired!
[23:11] <donnamartin> amazing
[23:11] <pretty_yeoman> -provincial- and federal laws
[23:11] <besoin> framing him
[23:11] <donnamartin> what is that a smoking gun for?
[23:11] <besoin> the salon murders of 02
[23:11] <Bob511> It was...already bagged?
[23:12] <Bob511> Aha
[23:12] <Trebbers> ahahh
[23:12] <donnamartin> ahahahha
[23:12] <@Ampersand> "but i'm a minor"
[23:12] <text2kayke> she can't catch him his legs are too long
[23:12] <dvr> double deek her
[23:12] <Trebbers> What a pitiful run
[23:12] <autarch> yeah
[23:12] <@Ampersand> this is erotic
[23:12] <autarch> like, you have to pick a direction faster
[23:12] <donnamartin> what are they arresting him for?
[23:12] <text2kayke> having hair
[23:12] <dan2> being a computer wizard
[23:12] <donnamartin> yeah what if that was his own hair?
[23:13] <besoin> good cawp bad cawp
[23:13] <Bob511> Recording children in locker rooms is presumably illegal in Canada?
[23:13] <pretty_yeoman> "nice headshots"
[23:13] <dan2> lady you have no idea how close you are to having him Hulk out
[23:14] <autarch> shit
[23:14] <donnamartin> isn't he a minor
[23:14] <autarch> laptop ran out of batteries
[23:14] <autarch> time??
[23:14] <autarch> TIME??
[23:14] <donnamartin> lawyer, parent?
[23:14] <Trebbers> "I let you tackle me"
[23:14] <dvr> 59 35
[23:14] <Bob511> More of a Bizarro in Clark Kent disguise.
[23:14] <besoin> the mainframe
[23:14] <dvr> 59 55
[23:14] <dan2> another classic prank
[23:15] <autarch> ok, thanks dvr
[23:15] <autarch> a thousand hits is nothing
[23:15] <lhs> taylor is under arrest
[23:15] <besoin> welp, gotta recuse myself, see ya
[23:15] <pretty_yeoman> lol
[23:16] <donnamartin> omg my kid had a boyfriend
[23:16] <donnamartin> omg this scene is sending me up
[23:16] <Trebbers> "My little girl is doing make outs now
[23:16] <pretty_yeoman> "I told myself I'd never let my daughter have sex."
[23:16] <autarch> "why couldn't you be gay like your friend"
[23:16] <autarch> "yeah but you're a cop now"
[23:16] <pretty_yeoman> why is it a mistake?
[23:16] <pretty_yeoman> i mean, yeah it's C sweater guy but
[23:17] <donnamartin> this is not very professional of mom
[23:17] <dan2> maybe its a mistake because she did the sex all wrong
[23:17] <besoin> how long until there's a new message from truth & lies
[23:17] <dan2> the video with 1,000 hits could be titled Epic Sex Fail
[23:18] <pretty_yeoman> ooookay
[23:18] <Bob511> Like Brandon?
[23:18] <Bob511> Really?
[23:18] <lhs> god another jacket
[23:18] <autarch> thanks, Lifetime
[23:18] <besoin> this is what happens when the canadian jacket manufacturing association finances a film
[23:18] <dan2> they look like your average 26yr old High School student, it's terrifying
[23:18] <donnamartin> i'm a fan of this jacket collection
[23:18] <pretty_yeoman> just doing their part to scare the living daylights out of boomers
[23:18] <pretty_yeoman> screenplay by Kohls
[23:19] <Trebbers> I don't trust this apology. It's her
[23:19] <Bob511> "They look just like your average Jonah Ryan on anabolic steroids."
[23:19] <dan2> lmao yeoman
[23:19] <donnamartin> OH MAN
[23:19] <text2kayke> scary sound
[23:19] <besoin> hey, you can't just dark music us into a commercial break
[23:19] <autarch> really fast cut to commercial
[23:19] <donnamartin> cody is the killer
[23:19] <donnamartin> isn't he a minor?
[23:19] <autarch> he looks 35 now
[23:19] <dan2> this guy reminds me of The Boy when it was revealed he was a man
[23:19] <Trebbers> You only get one phone call and a cup of maple syrup in Canada jail
[23:19] <Trebbers> haah dan
[23:19] <dvr> heh
[23:19] <@Ampersand> rohipinion lair
[23:20] <pretty_yeoman> heh trebs
[23:20] <donnamartin> where is this kids parents?
[23:20] <pretty_yeoman> no one has parents in the movie
[23:20] <dan2> "We found another wizard"
[23:20] <besoin> well, uh, let's see this video from the hospital
[23:20] <dan2> still _mighhht_ want to ding him for filming the girl's lockeroom
[23:21] <donnamartin> STOP TELLING YOUR KID THIS STUFF
[23:21] <text2kayke> room temperature soda
[23:21] <donnamartin> she's a terrible cop
[23:22] <Trebbers> "Just a lot of child porn, but no murder stuff"
[23:22] <pretty_yeoman> it's Taylor
[23:22] <@Ampersand> e-mail me, dear
[23:22] <besoin> more soda
[23:22] <autarch> Taylor Hi,
[23:22] <@Ampersand> mail chimp, honey
[23:22] <dan2> mmm Pepsi Blue
[23:22] <lhs> this is WAY too jacketless
[23:22] <dvr> just windexing the hood of my car
[23:23] <besoin> why did he have bb8 for a spray bottle
[23:23] <@Ampersand> camera breaking kayfabe
[23:23] <autarch> he drives a hot rod
[23:23] <autarch> dude drives a classic car
[23:23] <dan2> the more jackets he removes the closer he comes to revealing his true self
[23:23] <@Ampersand> Jacket. Cody Jacket
[23:23] <Bob511> She ruled out Cody entirely based on the fact that he asked her out on a date, right?
[23:23] <Trebbers> 2 you say
[23:23] <besoin> skylark will be on the surveillance footage
[23:23] <besoin> it's this movie's pink fedora
[23:23] <autarch> yeah no shit besoin
[23:23] <dan2> hey be nice
[23:24] <Bob511> Like, she literally said, hey, what if Cody's doing this?  But nah...
[23:24] <autarch> ok
[23:24] <autarch> good point besoin
[23:24] <pretty_yeoman> lol we're gonna find out sooner than we thought
[23:24] <donnamartin> we should photo shop the pink fedora into all movies
[23:24] <dan2> that's more like it
[23:24] <Trebbers> Flip phone in 2015
[23:24] <donnamartin> ooof, buddy
[23:24] <autarch> his house is that well
[23:24] <dvr> dont judge for flip phone in 2015
[23:25] <besoin> is that the house from fear
[23:25] <donnamartin> wait he lives in the lodge from twin peaks?
[23:25] <pretty_yeoman> "come on in, my parents aren't existing"
[23:25] <autarch> this is where she dies
[23:25] <donnamartin> he murdered his parents didn't he
[23:25] <besoin> car people!
[23:25] <text2kayke> uh oh
[23:25] <donnamartin> OH MAN
[23:26] <autarch> "we're siblings"
[23:26] <besoin> we never really heard who was responsible for the accident
[23:26] <text2kayke> they're all over the mantle
[23:26] <autarch> "oh my god. your mom invented christian girl autumn"
[23:26] <pretty_yeoman> aaaahh
[23:27] <besoin> was her dad drunk or something? having an affair doesn't make you have car accidents
[23:27] <text2kayke> his dick was too hard
[23:27] <pretty_yeoman> "she didn't even hear my high heels"
[23:27] <dan2> he's starting to talk like Holly Hunter
[23:28] <autarch> do we really need to see these flash back
[23:28] <dvr> my Walmart Caterpillar boots
[23:28] <Bob511> Texted his cover story to his wife while driving.
[23:28] <donnamartin> yes the killer always has to lay out and confess in detail
[23:28] <text2kayke> where's our hero to save her this time
[23:28] <besoin> the perfect crime, hitting someone with your car in broad daylight
[23:28] <dan2> lol
[23:28] <autarch> couldn't he have just talked while driving
[23:28] <donnamartin> he's like, 95 pounds
[23:29] <donnamartin> that did not knock her out
[23:29] <pretty_yeoman> he's super glad he had the floors waxed last week
[23:29] <besoin> we're gonna find out his full name is buffalo bill cody
[23:29] <dan2> "Good job doing all the detective work."
[23:29] <autarch> "took a walk around some jews"
[23:29] <Bob511> "Note the seven jackets."
[23:29] <pretty_yeoman> yes
[23:29] <pretty_yeoman> we even get an "enchance"
[23:29] <besoin> do hospitals have rohypnol
[23:30] <pretty_yeoman> shouldn't she mobilize some mounties or something first
[23:30] <dan2> Code Cody
[23:30] <besoin> just use find my iphone 4
[23:30] <Trebbers> ZOOM
[23:30] <autarch> just do a search for every cody in town
[23:30] <@Ampersand> weird amount of knowledge to have
[23:31] <lhs> Washington doesn't have DMV
[23:31] <besoin> thank god this guy transferred from philly
[23:31] <pretty_yeoman> searching for every cody in a town like this will crash the servers
[23:31] <autarch> "oh no! the other guy with a skylark is also named cody!
[23:31] <dvr> heh
[23:31] <Bob511> Ha
[23:31] <Trebbers> "Hmm, it's registered to a Mr. Dead Dad"
[23:31] <lhs> it's the DOL
[23:31] <dvr> department of, ?
[23:32] <lhs> licensing
[23:32] <autarch> justice for cody
[23:32] <dvr> ah
[23:32] <autarch> does he not get that it was her dad?
[23:32] <besoin> even he probably knows she's not DIRECTLY responsible
[23:32] <autarch> what the fuck
[23:32] <donnamartin> i mean...
[23:32] <Trebbers> This is so weird
[23:32] <autarch> did he call her?
[23:32] <dan2> not the REAL codyy????
[23:32] <autarch> "I lost more parents than you"
[23:33] <pretty_yeoman> of all the motives
[23:33] <besoin> "yeah, what's his address?"
[23:33] <autarch> "also, he's 34"
[23:33] <pretty_yeoman> is there a more Canadian street than Croft Ave
[23:33] <lhs> don't do anything until backup jackets arrive
[23:33] <dvr> Maple Lane
[23:33] <@Ampersand> no. more. jackets.
[23:33] <autarch> McDonald Way
[23:33] <@Ampersand> Dina Meyer Anti-Fan Club
[23:34] <text2kayke> she didn't do anything
[23:34] <text2kayke> what is he even going on about
[23:34] <autarch> he hasn't thought this through at all
[23:34] <Bob511> Why doesn't he want to kill Hannah's mom?
[23:34] <donnamartin> how does he still have this house if his parents are dead?
[23:34] <text2kayke> it's his aunt's house
[23:35] <lhs> he's 34
[23:35] <text2kayke> this motivation would make so much more sense if the dad had lived
[23:35] <text2kayke> he's punishing a guy who isn't even alive to be punished
[23:35] <autarch> maybe get backup?
[23:36] <besoin> does she even have probable cause to enter
[23:36] <lhs> [fighting grunts]
[23:36] <Bob511> She should just toss her jacket outside the house and wait for him to come out.
[23:36] <donnamartin> so mom could take brandon down but not 95 pound cody?
[23:36] <Trebbers> hah bob
[23:36] <dan2> was that a broomhandle?
[23:36] <autarch> yeah, fuck up his vase
[23:37] <autarch> give her the chair
[23:37] <pretty_yeoman> "while Brandon was creeping on locker rooms, I was studying the 2x4"
[23:37] <donnamartin> i think the probably cause is he kidnapped her daughter
[23:37] <besoin> the mom basically brought him a gun
[23:37] <besoin> when are we going to find out who owns the other skylark
[23:38] <dan2> "Now I have to kill you both...good thing I've got unlimited texting."
[23:38] <autarch> I would have jumped down on him from the bannister
[23:38] <besoin> sheesh
[23:38] <pretty_yeoman> should've worn a bulletproof jacket
[23:38] <autarch> the fucking arm?
[23:39] <Bob511> These guns only shoot arms.
[23:39] <autarch> are you kidding me?
[23:39] <besoin> she clearly shot him in the right shoulder
[23:39] <donnamartin> oh the soft music to let us know it's over
[23:39] <autarch> should have shot higher you stupid fuck head
[23:39] <besoin> i'm hearing it's not over
[23:39] <donnamartin> i mean, i don't think she's fine. she needs counseling
[23:39] <pretty_yeoman> ah this is all so Kohls can sell bulletproof vests for Back To School 2016
[23:39] <autarch> hahahahaha
[23:39] <besoin> booooo
[23:39] <donnamartin> oh that's it?
[23:39] <lhs> heh
[23:39] <@Ampersand> Sob Story to Acquit
[23:39] <Bob511> Highway Patrol?
[23:39] <pretty_yeoman> WILD
[23:39] <dan2> a Kohl's Blooded Killer
[23:39] <donnamartin> oh okay then
[23:39] <donnamartin> lol dan
[23:40] <@Ampersand> lmao
[23:40] <autarch> "this isn't over. when the court hears how sad I was they'll let me off"
[23:40] <pretty_yeoman> those cowards should've let "This isn't over" be the last line in the movie
[23:40] <donnamartin> it's lifetime, gotta end on a good i love you
[23:40] <@Ampersand> thank you, Canada
[23:40] <pretty_yeoman> I hate this, I love you all, Canada's cool too
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Postby Ampersand » Wed Sep 16, 2020 10:33 am

TONIGHT!
Image

(movie will be up this afternoon)
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Postby dan » Wed Sep 16, 2020 2:32 pm

PRESENTING:
Image
Image

https://www29.zippyshare.com/v/OmNaOzHB/file.html

All previous OSTs still available here
Code: Select all
https://mega.nz/#F!gRkkUJjZ!pTGNc7YpvI39UBqDwzPwrg


Another year of movie madness is in the books so it's time to celebrate with SOTMS Vol. 9. This year was positively loaded with great songs, so sit back, slap on the headphones, and take an audio trip down memory lane. As always I want to thank everyone who comes by to watch week after week for all laughs, for all the love, for all the collective groans, and for all the movie requests that have opened my eyes to worlds of cinema I never thought possible. I want to thank Trebbers for his work keeping classix going at a time when the extra nights of programming have been greatly needed and greatly appreciated. And most of all I thank Amp for keeping this whole operation alive, fun, and surprising (maybe baffling is a better word) after all these years.
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