Are you lonely lately?

Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
Courtney Love, and Marilyn Manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in

Only the lonely

Yes
45
75%
No
15
25%
 
Total votes : 60

Postby mancubz » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:48 am

i went to an engagement party last night and it was the most emotionless yet highly emotionally performative thing i've seen in AGES
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Postby mancubz » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:49 am

when people say 'i'm crying' at me and don't just actually laugh i want to kill them because i deserve more damn it!
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Postby Chester Minute » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:49 am

mancubz wrote:there's this thing i've noticed in my 'work friends' ( i think i don't like most of them) where there's a way over-exaggeration of emotion, like:
"omg i'm CRYING" (when something is funny, but no one is laughing?)
"i'm literally hysterical!" (but they're not)
big surprised excited faces that they hold for waaaaaaaaaaaay too long, probably just in case there's a picture or, even better, a boomerang (only called a 'boom' though)


Total pet peeve of mine

When I hear someone doing this on the phone in public I want to scream "no she's not she's not even smiling"

There's this dude I hang with sometimes who is so Valium personality that he does the opposite and I love it

: Boring anecdote:

"That. Is. Hi-laaaaar-i.us"

Said with no enthusiasm, very slowly
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Postby elaine » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:52 am

OH MY GOD IM SO LONELY MY BODY IS RETRACTING INTO ITSELF, I LITERALLY FEEL MY HEART TURNING INTO A BLACK HOLE
*said with no enthusiasm whatsoever*
Last edited by elaine on Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:53 am, edited 1 time in total.
I'm alright, don't nobody worry 'bout me .... BLACK IT OUT... BLACK IT OUT.... BLACK IT ALL OUT

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Postby mancubz » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:53 am

i wonder how long it'll be until people stop laughing entirely
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Postby mancubz » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:53 am

elaine are you telling us that you find something amusing?
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Postby elaine » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:58 am

loneliness is pretty funny, it makes people act like they're being directed, hey, i think we're losing touch with our emotions, everything is a scripted scene and we can't hear the laughing track cause we are the laughing track, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm alright, don't nobody worry 'bout me .... BLACK IT OUT... BLACK IT OUT.... BLACK IT ALL OUT

tarantula wrote:yeah, elaine gets it

dvr wrote:I gotta listen to that Chills
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Postby elaine » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:02 am

i met this girl so i told her i love you, poor girl, i dont even know who wrote that line, i just said it cause i didnt know anything else to say, i lonely you
I'm alright, don't nobody worry 'bout me .... BLACK IT OUT... BLACK IT OUT.... BLACK IT ALL OUT

tarantula wrote:yeah, elaine gets it

dvr wrote:I gotta listen to that Chills
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Postby RIXX » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:03 am

RIXX wrote:
chowder julius wrote:my best friend is a heavy drinker and I am not but we're still best friends. can you go to bars and not drink or is that triggering for you? i sometimes don't even have a single drink on a night out. the nice thing about dc venues is that there are so many straightedge ppl here they all serve like scrump rootbeers and nobody thinks twice about you ordering or drinking one

Luckily being at bars or around alcohol isn't triggering for me in the slightest, but it's more that I just do not do well in very loud environments when sober. i love to have conversations with people but i find it one of the most absurdly draining experiences to try and shout things to someone at a bar and have a halfway reasonable and intelligible conversation. i'm not soft-spoken but i'm also not a loud person, and most of the time I lose my voice the next day because i'm not used to it. also (and there's no way to say this without sounding corny and reddity)...among my close friends i'm the "funny person" in the group, and my comedic timing and delivery is not suited well to extremely loud noisy environments. i guess my style is kinda dry and sarcastic and deadpan (but definitely not in a weird steven wright sorta way lol) and when it's loud and there's no nuance I just kinda shut down and don't even attempt it. occasionally something funny might just come to my brain and i'll say it and get a WHAT DID YOU SAY? back and its like, why even bother

and like, even in the past when I was fucked up on a combo of things in any given night, I never really liked bar environments that much to begin with, because of all the aforementioned reasons. house/apt parties and kickbacks and beach parties and whatever have always been a million times more fun and my thing. and then take away the substances which make it all tolerable and I can just become miserable

i sound like such an old person with this post. but I guess bars have become our go-to for social events, and if I want to make lasting friendships in this football league, I gotta suck it up and go to em


wow what timing. literally after making this post, I got an email with them's weekly newsletter, and this was the main story

https://www.them.us/story/sober-queer-spaces

"The initiation into queer life usually involves alcohol and nightlife," says Josh Hersh, a former wine buyer who lives in New York City. "But can we envision other ways?"

Last year, Hersh was inspired to create a project called Queeret, a "global movement" uniting queer introverts by providing monthly events called Qalm, which offer quiet, sober spaces for coffee and conversation. It was Hannah Gadsby's Netflix special Nanette that gave him the idea for Queeret, which he is currently working to expand into seven new cities.

"[Hannah joked] 'Where do the quiet gays go?' and when I heard that … it was sort of a lightbulb moment and it really spoke to something I was feeling," he says. "I'd been in New York for about two and a half years and when I heard that I was like 'Where do the quiet gays go? How do I find them?' So it just felt like a really deep calling that I felt for a while."

For both Bauman and Hersh, the sober aspect of their respective spaces was built into their initial launch, largely for accessibility. Cuties was always intended to be an intergenerational space, Bauman says, and Hersh, who no longer drinks, says he sees alcohol as antithetical to what introverts who come to his events are looking for.

"Alcohol can give you this feeling of being more brave or courageous, but at the same time it doesn't lead to the same sort of connection that introverts really love," he says. "It kind of gives a false sense of connection." Hersh adds that introverts need environments that aren't overstimulating as nightclubs tend to be.

"When we're able to create an environment that is not intense on the senses, then we don't need [alcohol," he says, "because we're not struggling against the environment. When you feel comfortable and safe, then we can open up."


https://www.queeret.com/

— queeret (pronounced queer-it)
a global movement for queer introverts.
we create social gatherings that are quiet, queer & sober.
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Postby RIXX » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:09 am

thank god i'm queer. i have no idea how I would find any sort of community or identity without sorta just being born into one automatically
it's sorta like a cheat code
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Postby Robo-Chachi » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:12 am

Social interactions are overrated. I mean, have you ever had a conversation with someone? They’re incredibly boring!
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Postby DasLofGang » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:14 am

Chester Minute wrote:If I heard someone legit quote something in a social gathering I'd walk right out

as a man who has obviously never been bazinga'ed or pickle ricked IRL, I think what you meant to post here was "I've never truly lived"
heven’s full of merderers
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Postby Robo-Chachi » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:15 am

My wife gets mad at me every time we go out with other people because I invariably start starting off into space or other hints that I’m ready to be done interacting with people.
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Postby Robo-Chachi » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:19 am

I think the board has socially stunted a large potion of us.
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Postby DasLofGang » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:20 am

i got stunted by a large potion last night it's true
heven’s full of merderers
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Postby Robo-Chachi » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:24 am

Damnit
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Postby Chester Minute » Sun Mar 17, 2019 8:39 am

Robo-Chachi wrote:I think the board has socially stunted a large potion of us.


Eh I've always been this way
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Postby smartphone » Sun Mar 17, 2019 9:15 am

lonely as all hell
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Postby bruceagain » Sun Mar 17, 2019 9:18 am

i like being wanted around but i also have spent the majority of my life avoiding people and i wish it was more concordant with my desire to be loved
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Postby bruceagain » Sun Mar 17, 2019 9:21 am

that is: I'm only truly happy alone but i need some degree of sociality to function
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Postby RIXX » Sun Mar 17, 2019 9:22 am

bruceagain wrote:i like being wanted around but i also have spent the majority of my life avoiding people and i wish it was more concordant with my desire to be loved

bruceagain wrote:that is: I'm only truly happy alone but i need some degree of sociality to function


yeah this is a contradiction that I have not figured out how to solve yet
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Postby bruceagain » Sun Mar 17, 2019 9:26 am

i love being a million miles from anywhere but i also want you all to want me
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Postby Sobieski » Sun Mar 17, 2019 10:56 am

I want to get wine drunk and argue heatedly with somebody about something I don’t feel nonabstarct social emotions about

That’s the human social experience that’s better than solitude most of the time imo
Last edited by Sobieski on Sun Mar 17, 2019 11:03 am, edited 2 times in total.
smoke less weed
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Postby milknight » Sun Mar 17, 2019 10:57 am

im trying to get sober but i also dont have a gf and almost all my friends do and now i have to try to go on sober dates it stinks
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Postby landspeedrecord » Sun Mar 17, 2019 11:01 am

I was pretty hermetic and lonely in december and january, but have made more of an effort since february
rather be an idiot than a sheeple
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Postby Sobieski » Sun Mar 17, 2019 11:05 am

Drink this wine and tell me whether you believe in ethics or are a neoliberal!

Last weekend I played bingo with these high school english teachers and got tipsy on rosé, and that experience taught me a lot
smoke less weed
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Postby Sobieski » Sun Mar 17, 2019 11:08 am

also I don’t want to advocate alcohol, I don’t drink that much or think that it’s actually that big of a social lubricant

I just think a lot of conversations are boring and need something to make people reflect on the Absolute
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Postby KALM » Sun Mar 17, 2019 11:39 am

i'm not lonely but i do have long term fears about being alone, and those two things are weirdly related

i think my main problem is i'm never lonely enough to actually cultivate friendships or even good acquaintances because i'm totally fine with only ever hanging out with my 1 or 2 friends every now and then, and i don't even mind seeing them more infrequently than that if life gets in the way sometimes. and that's basically how i've been all my life, with different friends filling that role at various points. but i'm starting to worry that's no longer sustainable the way it once was, because if one of them moves away now or whatever i might suddenly find it's too late in life to make new friends and i've done such a terrible job of meeting people and keeping in touch with everyone else i've ever known because i've never felt it necessary for my emotional well-being that i'm now actually going to be truly alone, well past the threshold of what i can tolerate, and there won't be anyone even casually a part of my life i could call on to help fix that
Last edited by KALM on Sun Mar 17, 2019 12:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby KALM » Sun Mar 17, 2019 11:49 am

i mean really it's just the mundane fear of not being able to make new friends past a certain age, but intensified by my recognition that i'm kind of in a precarious situation and i could find myself there at any time now
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Postby WussWayne » Sun Mar 17, 2019 12:42 pm

I try not to be alone but I overextend in my effort to do so (frequently at my own expense) in off-putting ways that drive people away and end result feeds back into the start of the cycle. I dunno what's wrong with me. I recognise what's happening but it's like I'm watching a twitch stream or something. I haven't had any real friends since like 2014. Then I go back into seclusion for a while. I'm kinda staying home more and more now and I defo can't do this sober. I already fucked up whatever weeks of sobriety I'd built up by getting trashed this saturday to cope and it's defo gonna happen again, and again, and again. I should really go to more meetings.
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